Forgiveness

“When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.”
Catherine Ponder

Tell Me About You

What are you listening to right now?
What was the last thing you ate?
If you were a crayon what color would you be?
What color is your underwear right now?
Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?
The first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
Where is your favorite place for a first date?
Ever got so drunk you don't remember?
What color are your eyes?
Are you single?
What is favorite month and why?
Last movie you watched?
What is your favorite day of the week?
Are you too shy to ask someone out?
Hugs or Kisses?
Chocolate or Vanilla?
What books are you reading?
Do you have any piercing?
What is your all time favorite movie?
Dogs or Cats?
What is your favorite flower?
Have you ever fired a gun?
Do you like to travel by plane as opposed to car?
Right handed or left handed?
How many pillows do you sleep with?
Are you missing someone?

I LOVE THIS SONG

BRIGHT EYES

"First Day Of My Life"

This is the first day of my life
I swear I was born right in the doorway
I went out in the rain suddenly everything changed
They're spreading blankets on the beach

Yours is the first face that I saw
I think I was blind before I met you
Now I don’t know where I am
I don’t know where I’ve been
But I know where I want to go

And so I thought I’d let you know
That these things take forever
I especially am slow
But I realize that I need you
And I wondered if I could come home

Remember the time you drove all night
Just to meet me in the morning
And I thought it was strange you said everything changed
You felt as if you'd just woke up
And you said “this is the first day of my life
I’m glad I didn’t die before I met you
But now I don’t care I could go anywhere with you
And I’d probably be happy”

So if you want to be with me
With these things there’s no telling
We just have to wait and see
But I’d rather be working for a paycheck
Than waiting to win the lottery
Besides maybe this time is different
I mean I really think you like me

emerge triumphant

spin the bottle
hickey on your neck
sex on a bathroom floor
waking to that old
familiar
latex laden stench
smelling of cigarettes
of cheep cologne

revisiting
your past
your sex
so desperate

your years
have they taught you nothing?

emerge triumphant
strong and beautiful woman
and revel in the knowledge
that you have been reminded yet again
not to relive your past
reinvent yourself
evolve
choose love

thinking

“The wine of youth does not always clear with advancing years; sometimes it grows turbid”
Carl Gustav Jung

I have been asked many times if I am ever curious about you?
Do I ever think of looking for you?

Meeting you I fear would be a trite 80 talk show re-run
Crying desperation
Embracing
"Forgiveness"
When the crowd disappears
The sad reality sets in
That you chose another life
One that didn't include me

I have fantasies of
Watching you from afar
Like a heartless stalker
Removed
From emotion
Behind the glass of a car windshield
Night vision goggles, binoculars and a telephoto lens
Curious
I would like to see your face
Would I see something
Myself perhaps?

For now
I will choose to go on with my life
With out you
Because I am better off not knowing
I have my imagination
My explanation of why you abandoned me
It is enough for right now

Pine Forest by Gabriela Mistral

Let us go now into the forest.
Trees will pass by your face,
and I will stop and offer you to them,
but they cannot bend down.
The night watches over its creatures,
except for the pine trees that never change:
the old wounded springs that spring
blessed gum, eternal afternoons.
If they could, the trees would lift you
and carry you from valley to valley,
and you would pass from arm to arm,
a child running
from father to father.

DON'T DRESS YOUR CAT IN AN APRON

by Dan Greenburg

Don't dress your cat in an apron
Just `cause he's learning to bake.
Don't put your horse in a nightgown
Just `cause he can't stay awake.
Don't dress your snake in a muu-muu
Just `cause he's off on a cruise.
Don't dress your whale in galoshes
If she really prefers overshoes.
A person should wear what he wants to
And not just what other folks say.
A person should do what he likes to
A person's a person that way.

A summer in San Francisco when I was 18

I remember that summer we spent in a small flat on Fell street.
We were so young, playing house together.
I remember making love every night hungry for each-other
Or was it I who was hungry for you?
We had wine from a box and dinner parties with take out from down the street
You were obsessed with Donovan that summer and every morning I would wake to the scratchy vinyl recording of colours.
I loved to watch you walk naked to the bathroom
your beautiful ass in the soft morning light
Warm under the quilt my grandmother had made from Alice in Wonderland sheets
(You had that quilt years later when i came to visit you and your girlfriend in San Francisco ... I wonder if you still have it?)
I remember the 4th of July - driving everyone up to twin peeks in my VW bug
The fog a thick blanket, couldn't see a thing, we could only hear the explosion
After we returned home I got drunk and yelled at you for flirting with the girl I called Cleopatra
You laughed at me and I laughed at myself
When the summer was over we spent the hours before your bus left having Blondie's Pizza and kissing in Union Square
I remember your fingers grasping the chain link fence at the Greyhound station
You were crying
I didn't cry I thought it was a goodbye for now - see you later
You must have known that everything would change

A dream

In your arms laughing
At a world so ridiculous
The light of the fire illuminating
Soft light washes over us
I relax into your body
Your soft warm breath on my neck
Strong hands tracing the side of my body
Moving slowly
you undress me
I feel the heat between us
our bare chests pressing against each-other
The dog licks my knee
We laugh
Falling back on to the couch
Lightly kissing breasts
My belly quivers in anticipation.....
My alarm goes off
I try to go back to sleep
Back to the dream
Back to the warmth
To the heat
Crap time to get up.

Colours ( I miss D'arcy)

Yellow is the colour of my true love's hair,
In the morning, when we rise,
In the morning, when we rise.
That's the time, that's the time,
I love the best.

Green's the colour of the sparklin' corn,
In the morning, when we rise,
In the morning, when we rise.
That's the time, that's the time,
I love the best.

Blue's the colour of the sky-y,
In the morning, when we rise,
In the morning, when we rise.
That's the time, that's the time,
I love the best.

Mellow is the feeling that I get,
When I see her, m-hmm,
When I see her, oh yeah.
That's the time, that's the time,
I love the best.

Freedom is a word I rarely use,
Without thinking, oh yeah,
Without thinking, m-hmm.
Of the time, of the time,
When I've been loved.

Yellow is the colour of my true love's hair,
In the morning, when we rise,
In the morning, when we rise.
That's the time, that's the time,
I love the best.

-Donovan