Musings, Ramblings and Raptures

Edges

Caitlin — Sat, 07 Feb 2009 01:22:22 GMT

Careful now, she cried, as the sum of all her days weighed down upon her Walk steady, she murmured, for this is your time Breath into the mirror of your shadow as it shows what is no longer temptation, necessity or reality, but ghosts of past selves who did not know their way to the light. Careful, as the waves roar and spread and open, like her mind, like her womb Careful as the warm offspring of her most refined contours are born out from the darkness; Light tendrils fast and brilliant, slow and swirling, alive and scintilating, mark their course through her flesh This is just the beginning, a mark along the curve of her spine, a delicate movement of new color and sound through her bones She remembers everything And she longs to be free And she feels every vessel inside her heart, beating, birthing, vibrating, revivified, a tonic to the dark night outside, to the cries she hears in the night.... She is ALIVE!!!!!! A queen of every angle A torchlight made blue with the heat of her star-born soul The beginning and the end her very presence And the night dancers howl And the black blue bird wings of her thoughts stand perched, awaiting flight And all songs cease and renew in the fabric of her voice: Lifted cloud, sorrows siren, her one and only flight.... Careful, as the world turns and yesterdays fortune dies while tomorrows not yet arrived, On the precipice of a deep dive from which there is no return....

Homeland

Caitlin — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 22:39:22 GMT

For what was once my name is now a field of perfect stars. From their shining constellations I come and to their infinite arms I roam. Balanced in a rapture between worlds, long held velvet nights on the edges of the quickening fire pulses of dawn, I have come to bless this world with the gift of song-slivers and shimmers of silver drenched melody making its way through the caucaphony of noise trembles and mire. I have come from worlds far and loft, their spells and murmurs awake in my bones, telling of lifetimes gained and lost. Lavender skies unwind in my smile as deaths ringing culprit surrenders its clutch and I find myself spinning in infinities touch- it’s vast array of color and sound the constant companion to this flesh life- a reminder for all what stretches beyond this seeming sight. I know of pain and its workings. I live on the verges of ceaseless sorrow and joys untold. I know of something so beautiful, and yet I forget how to spell out the letters and the stories of these places so real inside. And so I come to this threshold moment in time to herald the verge of this awakening –to call forth what has once been lost that perhaps my spirit may know the taste and the feel of its own release. I come back to the place I started from.

Baby Dolphin Love-So So Sweet!

Caitlin — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 20:36:26 GMT

Within

Caitlin — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 22:14:41 GMT

Blue Velvet Curtains Part For the Revealing of the Within. Within- Spells of Swirling Rhythms Divine Past and Future Ecstacies Sapphire Selenite Caves Alight- Dancing Spark and Riddle Tongue Blue Palace of my Womb Murmurs Subterranean Lullabies In the once Dark, now Shining Night Within Trillions of Stars-These Cells-Birth Anew Scintillating Fabric of Sparkling Matter Echoing the Domed Temple of the Skies... Owl Speak, Wolf Cry- Sacred Protecters of these Rich Inner Chambers I am filled with Jewels and Windows, Radiant Bird Song, Misty Lanes, Mirror Wisdom, Winged Tomorrows... Vast Inner Dimensions Unfolding, Unraveling, Delight.... This Blue Night Within...

Falling...

Caitlin — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 04:37:42 GMT

Falling Under stars awake and night blooming Crystal veins flow Light of blue eyes shine Deep beneath the canopy of the sky She’s dancing over water Light steps awake on the path of the moon A candle, a lotus Weeping willow tears

Raise the Shadow

Caitlin — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 04:31:01 GMT

Raise the shadow And brighten the lens Glory be Glory be Hear the whispers And the banshee cries As the waves roll in… Watch the sound as it is carried across the horizons Into the open corners of the sky ‘Neath the wings of herons and doves Listen to the call rising from below Heralding the Legends of forgotten dreams: Tall ships and masquerades Horseriders guided by moonbeams Crystal cities of the wide open dawns All these born in the fathomless depths of your soul Ocean, lift these eyes that they may see Open these ears that they may hear Wet these lips that once thirsted for your song And pour forth this voice across your ageless miles. Ancients songs of the silver morning ever upon this tongue… I want to act out the depths of love on your watery flesh, Dance in the towers of your breath, Be the melody of your ceaseless song There is nothing that will stop me from This call of love! No word, no voice, no mind, no thought. Only this holy fury, this remembrance Only this honor I give my storm battered heart to you, blue song. Ocean of promise I give my heart to you.

Neptune

Caitlin — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 04:15:17 GMT

Neptune I hear you calling me Yesterday I found you sleeping And in your dreaming you sang to me softly (Lapis ripples, Mother of Pearl) Today you pulled Father Thunder Down from the sky And with him called my name (Black Onyx twilight, Indigo dancers) Tomorrow I may feel The smile of the sun or the tears of the moon And I know you are sending me your laughter (Oh, song of Silver Morning) But Great Ocean, I pray I will never hear your silence It is your swirling hymns, your constant rhythm That sustain me (Aquatic Symphony, Mercurial Lullaby) What I would give to ride your frothing white stallions Or to swim forever down to your cool, dark depths To be a part of your netherworld for all time (Light of Blue Heavens, Night of Aquamarine skies) This is what I was born for, Neptune, my love

It's a New Dawn, It's a New Day

Caitlin — Fri, 07 Nov 2008 03:56:02 GMT

Birds flyin' High You know how I feel Sun in the Sky You know how I feel Breeze driftin' on by You know how I feel It's a New Dawn It's a New Day It's a New Life FOR US!!!!

Rapture

Caitlin — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 03:32:34 GMT

Sultry, rich, like chocolate pouring warm over tongue Languid movement set light to heated breath Heart wings of luminous fire Opening doorways to ruby soft pleasures, Velvetine raptures, Spiralling, ceaseless vortices Ever expanding towards the dawn Sunrise, Sunrise Mists outside dance in cool remark, Swirling to the hypnotic hymn of breath on breath, Gently caressing tender tendrils of emerald ferns, mirroring the great unfurling inside- Inside Powerful Sun God chants ancient whale hum and honey soft rhythm onto my tongue, Taste so sweet and kiss so full no ambrosia could compare In him Subterranean depths and titanic worlds truly a wonder to behold Whilst Pantera Queen, Priestess of sinuous serpentine languor Wraps spells of secret delight onto fire-warmed flesh, An unfolding vision of raptures' ancient and unhurried way Black hair undone and onyx eyes alight with great eternal knowing, Keeper of sultry gold and the most sensuous high A morning moon peers in to witness the clear depths unfolding As heart becomes heart becomes liberties' hypnotic, flame-colored song.... All as one Ceaseless flow A Union of light and of sacred fire An initiation passed in flying wings of the most brilliant of colors So Fine Simply Divine

Day Will Come (Lyrics written for the band Tryad)

Caitlin — Sat, 19 Jul 2008 10:09:47 GMT

Come Open up your eyes I'll show you what we're made for Out in open skies Our walls will fall Our lies will die We'll Dive Into eachothers eyes Over and over as we fly So High Bygone will be disguise We'll break this spell of Sorrow Your waiting there to Take me home My love I've come along to Take you home My friend Across these fields of stars we'll wander Hand in Hand And in these eyes the solemn promise of the skies Your waiting there to Take me home My love I've come along to Take you home My friend I've crossed the oceans to Take you home Oh hear my voice We've come together to Take us Home Again And I believe the day will come That we shall rise again Every color blends And then the night will surely end Yes I know the Day has come that we shall rise again It's just around the bend So follow me until the end

Marching Towards the End of Time (Lyrics written for the band Tryad)

Caitlin — Sat, 19 Jul 2008 09:59:12 GMT

Sun is Flaring Tides they rise Pack your bags Let go your lies The end of time is now upon us Sky of smoke and warring streets Poisoned hearts and tired feet The ground is shaking underneath us But you can't feel Maybe we'll find our way Maybe we'll reach another day The sky is raining down upon us (Take my Hand) If there's another way Maybe we'll find it here today Our time is up and you? Where are you? Faster now, pick up your speed Forget you ever had the need To watch the beauty of a sunrise (no, you'd rather watch TV) Tidal waves await our fate Seismic shifts too great to take The undercurrents of our memories Rereleased Maybe we'll find our way Maybe we'll reach another day The sun is beating down upon us (Take my Hand) If there's another way Maybe we'll find it here today Our time is up and you? What are you? Awake! Awake! for all we love Will pass away in war and flood Oh please hear the song of your blood Quickening pace this derailed train Faster down the fucking drain The raw assault of this pain Too much to bear Maybe we'll find our way Maybe we'll reach another day The night is falling down upon us (Take my Hand) If there's another way Maybe we'll find it here today Our time is up and you? What will you do?

A Dare

Caitlin — Tue, 18 Mar 2008 09:26:00 GMT

I have seen rivers of fire fall, drop by drop into a black and smouldering sea I have seen the phantom ships that pass unannounced along windy forgotton shores I have watched the red rose smile upon her lips turn from ashes to flame in one naked, revealing moment I have watched as buildings were plundered and skies once blue were blackened by so many stolen sorrows I have seen winter fields laid bare and soaked in some soldiers precious blood-the red waves like lava flowing from his youthful limbs the final testament of his brilliant and wasted life I have seen the angels who come and beckon soft winds to those who have failed and the elementals who would see to it that all beings be awoken to their own hidden and molten design I have seen the torment of the centuries alive in one mans gaze-the flames of his heart burning violet with all that is untamed and unspoken I have seen hands outreached-begging, offering, dying, in prayer and the million armies that march to the beat of some scorched metallic drum-flat, timid, spiked with fear I have seen the one I love vanish into the mists of his own creation-a ghost to some past dream or fortune or vanity- a ghost to his own self-made apparition of what he was SUPPOSED to be I have seen legions of the darkest of souls as they dance and scurry their way onto the scene, unannounced and uninvited, privy to every wanton lust and desire at play in the streets of the cities, at play in the fortresses of gold and of steel I have seen the wings of Icarus as they touched the sun and melted deep into the sea... The flames grow higher Dear god they burn As so many flee the scene for want of an easier outing into this strange and oft misunderstood episode called life While escape has no meaning While fires they burn in rings sure and steady and fierce So that not one soul Not one being Shall depart unscathed, Unscathed and resurrected by the sheer heat of the reckoning at hand.

An Open Heart

Caitlin — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 06:35:13 GMT

Her heart was wrenched It told of ancient spells and heartache upon heartache upon heartache-lifetimes passed in useless toil, loss, loneliness Her chest was squeezed cold and barren-there in her heart where something profound had died- Her joy- Her joy, Her joy! Wrapped and trapped and spun up inside veil upon web upon dank and desperate veil-the joy she had once lived without fear-lost inside some story, some spell, some strange language altogether removed from her own true soul Tears so tired, so wound, so needed came down, first in small torrents, then in floods, as her heart unraveled that most ancient spell of bittersweet sorrow And there, beyond the layers of corrosion and fear, there lay her heart, Gentle and fragrant as a pink rose at dawn In her flesh, temple upon temple, city upon city, pyramids of pure gold arose The Kingdoms of the Stars and The Fairies alive within her bones The queen of light beckoned while beautiful stranger appeared with a message crafted out of the pure light of love And deep, deep, deep inside-imagine this! A star! A Supernova! A pale blue light brighter than the eye could possibly see! Her very own heart a star as vast and as bright as unhurried and sure, as vibrant and full of cool, steady heat as any and all the lights in all the worlds combined! At last a safe shore to call home At last a quiet place within to believe and to touch At last a field upon which to live entirely untouched by thought or time, memory or curse At last the remembrance of what it means to truly shine! Shine your light on the world! Shine your light for all the universes to see! The Holy Land Of the Heart- The Arc of the Covenant- The ceaselessly burning blue sphere of the souls ceaseless emergence- Light of Lights! Song of Songs! Heart awakened once more! Hallelujah!

Again....

Caitlin — Fri, 11 Jan 2008 10:14:07 GMT

Carefully she unwraps the gift as she hears the call of creation quietly and surely emerge from her breast- Soft torrents of light and shadow Pink stardust backlit by a gentle smile. Once upon a time, she'd been given over to the indelicate dreams of a world gone awry yet now something inside as quiet and old and real as the turn of the day arises within and she is born of mountains sighs and she is held inside shells of pearl and dusk and she is lit up inside by forces she herself can barely name and she is rocked gently upon the memory of cloud and sky Hers is a spell of rapture, a quiet song of pure knowing the irises unveiling unto the day....

Annunciation

Caitlin — Tue, 16 Oct 2007 10:24:45 GMT

The Skies Reach down and bend to Our Ears Reminding Us to Listen to the Chimes of Dawn Arriving All that was ever Clear and Just and Holy will Awaken In the Course of these coming days And the spell of disenchantment will come undone The Skies will grow Resplendant in Rays of Colors Undescribable The Days shall Call out in so many Hallowed Tongues and Enraptured Songs of Return The Clouds will part and Reveal Star upon Star upon Star- Countless and Incandescently Shining in their Glory And In the Mirror of the Skies, We will Know that We are the Chosen Ones, The Ones of Might and of Annunciation Heralders of the New Dawn Arising in Untold Brilliance Strung with Golden Harp Strings and Diamond Sharp Rains Blue Skies Dancing and Emergent Sighs of Release and of Ageless Wonder

The Farthest Reaches

Caitlin — Sun, 03 Jun 2007 22:43:47 GMT

Last weekend, I traveled to the highest height I have ever been and to the lowest depth I have ever been, profound experiences the both. Friday evening, after a week of process and pain, upheaval and enlightenment, I scaled, with the company of five friends and the help of a 4 wheel drive Cherokee Jeep, the top of Mauna Loa. Not only is Mauna Loa is the largest volcano in the world, it is also the highest from base to summit. Its gentle slope and shield-like shape belie the greatness of this edifice. Here's an excerpt from a website I just downloaded that descibes the make-up of the mountain how, when all is said and done, it is 56,000 feet from top to bottom!!!! This I stood upon: The heights of mountains are generally given by their elevation above a datum, such as sea level. The highest point on Mauna Loa is 4,170 m (13,680 ft) above sea level. But the flanks of Mauna Loa continue another 5,000 m (16,400 ft) below sea level to the sea floor. The massive central portion of the volcano has depressed the sea floor another 8,000 m (26,000 ft) in the shape of an inverted cone, reflecting the profile of the volcano above it. Thus, the total relief of Mauna Loa, from its true base to its summit, is about 17,170 m (56,000 ft). Wow!!! We arrived at the 13,680 foot summit just as the last glowing drops of the sun fell gracefully behind the miles and miles of clouds that lay before the horizon. The scene the sun left behind where earth meets heaven was a brilliant ban of Carnelian Orange glow, fading into gold then green then the most brilliant clear shining indigo blue sky I have ever seen. So vivid, so clear, standing there inside a dome of pure principle, God's carefully crafted light. The temperature was probably a good 30 degrees, a signifigant drop from the consistent 80 degrees I have become accustomed to at my home 12000 feet below. We were all shivering but so very alive, lighter stanced, each step softer than the ones we are used to on lower ground. I do believe we were all a bit giddy from the lack of oxygen!!! The terrain all around us was all sloping, red tinted black lava rock, creating an atmosphere akin to what you would experince say, on Mars. And to add to this otherwordly quality, dotted about this barren landscape are multiple silver domes that house the most advanced telescopes on the planet. You know all those majestic images of galaxies, constellations, nebulas and stars being born? It is from this mountain many of them are discovered and documented. We danced a little, we ran a little, we shivered alot and watched in awe as the sky sang into its night glory and Venus appeared so bright. Then we headed on down to the observatory at 9000 feet where we drank hot cocoa and gazed through telescopes at Saturn and the moons of Jupiter as they peered out from behind their planetary consort. Sunday: On Sunday my friend Ron and I went to a famous snorkelling locale in south Kona called Two Steps (thus named for the convenient ledges of lava rock that guide all snorkellers in the sea) I practiced again my free diving and found a whole new level of freedom and meditation in the practice. I made it as far down as 25 feet this time, my deepest depth yet! There was one dive where I took some kind of quantum leap, not only in my diving, but in my consciousness, a true moment of "Zen" where all thought, fear, tension, or concern dropped away and my vision became all seeing and I felt nothing but a calm and spacious peace. Hard to describe but it felt truly interdimensional. It was this dive I went down the furthest. Upon coming to the surface, my friend Ron was in awe and saw how something fundamental had shifted in my approach/experience. Its as though something in me that has been asleep is being awoken again in the waters, some primal remebrance that we once belonged to the sea and knew no bounds. Epic! We were later met by a new friend Matisha www.songofhome.com, who is some kind of wondrous magician under the sea. The image attached is an example of the "art" he creates under the suface. Gorgeous rings like magical glowing irridescent hula hoops emerge from his mouth, one after the other, creating a scene unlike anything I have ever seen. Blue blue blue all around touched by the grace of these silvery opalesecent rings. We would dive under them and through them, like circus animals in some ethereal dream and dance about as gracefully as the dolphins themselves in that ocean clear like crystal water, warm and thick like our very own blood. We also swam through bubbles created by scuba divers that acted like the bubbles in a champagne glass, only they were 30 feet long and 5 feet wide. They feel so good as they tickle your skin and dance about your every move. So from the heighest heights to the deepest depths, I found something of stillness, something of grace, something of eternity, not to mention some serious chills and a mild sunburn. Another weekend in Paradise......

A Shrine for the God of Love by Sri Aurobindo

Caitlin — Tue, 15 May 2007 06:32:55 GMT

Near to earth's wideness, intimate with heaven, Exalted and swift her young large-visioned spirit Voyaging through worlds of splendour and of calm Overflew the ways of Thought to unborn things. Ardent was her self-poised unstumbling will; Her mind, a sea of white sincerity, Passionate in flow, had not one turbid wave. As in a mystic and dynamic dance A priestess of immaculate ecstasies Inspired and ruled from Truth's revealing vault Moves in some prophet cavern of the gods, A heart of silence in the hands of joy Inhabited with rich creative beats A body like a parable of dawn That seemed a niche for veiled divinity Or golden temple-door to things beyond. Immortal rhythms swayed in her time-born steps; Her look, her smile awoke celestial sense Even in earth-stuff, and their intense delight Poured a supernal beauty on men's lives. A wide self-giving was her native act; A magnanimity as of sea or sky Enveloped with its greatness all that came And gave a sense as of a greatened world: Her kindly care was a sweet temperate sun, Her high passion a blue heaven's equipoise. As might a soul fly like a hunted bird, Escaping with tired wings from a world of storms, And a quiet reach like a remembered breast, In a haven of safety and splendid soft repose One could drink life back in streams of honey-fire, Recover the lost habit of happiness, Feel her bright nature's glorious ambience, And preen joy in her warmth and colour's rule. A deep of compassion, a hushed sanctuary, Her inward help unbarred a gate in heaven; Love in her was wider than the universe, The whole world could take refuge in her single heart. The great unsatisfied godhead here could dwell: Vacant of the dwarf self's imprisoned air, Her mood could harbour his sublimer breath Spiritual that can make all things divine. For even her gulfs were secrecies of light. At once she was the stillness and the word, A continent of self-diffusing peace, An ocean of untrembling virgin fire; The strength, the silence of the gods were hers. In her he found a vastness like his own, His high warm subtle ether he refound And moved in her as in his natural home. In her he met his own eternity. Savitri, pp. 14-16.

In Hawaii...

Caitlin — Mon, 14 May 2007 06:19:26 GMT

How can I begin to describe what majesty and wonder has been unveiled in the presence of these most kind and illustrious beings? Free flow stream of consciousness here we go: Today I had my first private audience with a small pod of 5 dolphins-they came to me "out of the blue" and danced around me in circles for what was only minutes but felt like eternity. I told a story to one about life above the water-babies and flowers, redwood trees and musicians, mountains and good friends. She was very pleased and liked what I shared very much and as I focused in on her and her alone, two dolphins came up from behind me (mischieviously I might add) just barely grazing me, startling me out of my communion with the one. I responded with a happy giggle-a frequent expression I can't help but feel in their midst. I'm pretty sure they giggled back! Try laughing through a snorkel sometime-it's pretty awkward. I find that in the blue depths all worldly hindrance and self-importance slips away and a kind of simple awe arrives. In the clearest turquiose depths, I watch the light dance on the ocean floor, ripples and curves of golden light cascading through the luminescent blue. Today the water felt like silk and was the temperature of blood and I would watch my hands sift through the waters all lit up like some apparition-my own hands so holy! When in the midst of lifes sweet quiet splendor living on and on beneath the surface of the sea, one can barely comprehend how there could ever be an unkind word spoken or toil born. I do not understand. I love to hear the dolphin song before greeting them- you know they are close and yet all you can see at first is the vast expanse of sea of sea of sea and perhaps some coral or rippling white sand or little fishies laid out before you, until suddenly they appear-graceful angels of the oceans lore- all smiles and movement and light. And imagine, all you need is a snorkel mask to experince such heavens. I love them so much! Today I was able to free dive further than ever before and with the most ease yet ( I have been practicing) -I think I made it down past 15 feet and I swam under the surface alongside the dolphins for the first time-totally immersed with them in their sweet and enchanted, serene and peaceful underworld. What a gift! What a gift! And when they went along their way into their dreaming sleep state where I could not follow, I stayed behind and practiced my newly found swimming skills under the waves. I spun and I danced and I twisted like a corkscrew through the soft, pearlescent sea-a feeling like nothing you can experience above the water-weightless, full of grace, at ease somehow in the watery world below. Meanwhile, above the water, many good people gather. Divine muisic strings out from steroes and guitars and flowers of every shade exclaim their lively wonder for the world to behold. Goofiness and sweet laughter rule the roost here as it is nearly impossible to take life too seriously upon these blessed shores. We're pretty sure we're becoming 3 years old again-a practice I highly recommend it to all ye grouchy faced modern day city dwellin' adults in need of some humor! Like in the movie Mary Poppins where the key to levitation is through laughter! 'Tis true, 'tis the way! Today I saw a carpet of firey magenta blossoms covering the road, coupled with a carpet of lavender violet jacaranda flowers- whole roadsides made of flowers!!! And oh the luscious scent of gardenias and oh the intoxicating aroma of night blooming jasmine and oh the sublime subtleties of the plumeria and macademia and coffee blossoms and the great displays of orchid trees and bougainvillea and hibiscus. And don't get me started on the fruits- lilikoi vines covering miles of fences, papayas infinitely producing their sunrise hued fleshy fruits, Suriname cherries transluscent red sour sweet sublime, and the mangoes now officially in season literally dripping off their branches-such golden sun drenched nectariferous yumness! As you can see I am enchanted and graced and full of such gratitude for what beauty life can hold, here in Hawaii. I pray we all can experience some kind of wonder today and everyday, that helps feed the god within and break the spell of disillusionment and dis-ease, that we are all blessed by the warm touch of the sun and a friends smile and a good laugh and some light inside and throughout the tunnel.... Sending you all good vibes and pearly visions, Caitlin

Becoming

Caitlin — Sat, 05 May 2007 06:26:06 GMT

The ridicule of the assaulting days pressed upon her chest like so many needless weights. Hour upon waking hour of forfeit thought, inept circumstance and useless toil bore down upon her, While the being within her, The Great Knowing, Watched patiently the timid and unfulfilled days awaiting the moment that she would hear she would breath she would know once more the wild luminescent fire of her soul. Her soul-colour all-illumined and shining, calling out across the peaks and the valleys of all times. A soul triumphant unto its own cause, Perfectly alone and utterly fixed to a higher destiny, A destiny unforgotten by the illustrious pages of the eternal mind. Her heart spoke out from under riddle and rubble, that were born of misdeed and spite, and gave way to so many flowing rivers of timeless beauty- There where her work was unsullied and laid out like some ancient map- crystalline gateways of her vast and innumerable expanses laid bare, naked, clear for her to travel and to know From the perilous turning of the hours, Across treacherous and barren territories her soul would traverse, All for a love of all things wild and true. She would walk, Over times grinding ceaseless wheels, Through the machinery of the marching armies of forced mechanism and fear, Across the very shadow of death itself, To know what it is the mortal day bows to and is bound to, To call ignorance by its true name, that she may dash its foibles upon the rocks for once and for all, and know freedoms road, and show freedoms road, To the souls greatest heights. A lofty thought beget an even mightier deed, a deed far beyond the rationales mind- From these pages her lion-breasted soul would emerge, Resplendent and naked in all its untempered glory. She knew no bounds and sang the songs of love from across her heavenly horizons- The water dance and the pearlescent hymn she sung a sweet balm for the torpid turn of the world Could it be she was awake and alive to the deeper rhythmns and the fortitudes of the undying spirits aim? In his voice she found her own and could no longer lay in hiding For the earth shook beneath her feet and the sun flared its daily heated warning- That the tides are rising and the animals are dying- Billions of souls preparing their departure as the soul of the world loses its grip and all things brittle and bent take its place Tarry no more did she in the trite and the injust, no more her ways undefined- Just as the catepillar knows its way by some wind-struck miracle through space and time, out from inside a holy wrapped cocoon, into flight of wings to sky, So too her soul, destined for greater heights. Ambivalence a memory of some incomplete past, Here today the only song she could possibly rehearse for the witnessing stage of eternity, was her very own lullaby, Clear bird of the luminous winds, Rapt and careful spell composed of ocean, sea and sky The mystic and the titanic wonder of the soul of all worlds Released in the lull of her voice, Put to rest in the folds of her arms, Made realized in the perfect reading of these pages born of stars and heavens sighs. From where she came and to where she has always been, These plumed and medallioned fortresses in her heart her compass and her destiny at once, This song a song born for the world to sing itself into beginning, This song the song for the soul to know itself once more.

Blood of Eden: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dA_lmSTqet0

Caitlin — Thu, 03 May 2007 21:19:51 GMT

Please watch this video by Peter Gabriel and Sinead O'Connor-it's all there: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dA_lmSTqet0 I caught sight of my reflection I caught it in the window I saw the darkness in my heart I saw the signs of my undoing They had been there from the start And the darkness still has work to do The knotted chord's untying They're heated and they're holy Oh they're sitting there on high So secure with everything they're buying [Chorus:] In the blood of Eden Lie the woman and the man With the man in the woman And the woman in the man In the blood of Eden Lie the woman and the man We wanted the union Oh the union of the woman The woman and the man My grip is surely slipping I think I've lost my hold Yes, I think I've lost my hold I cannot get insurance anymore They don't take credit, only gold Is that a dagger or a crucifix I see You hold so tightly in your hand And all the while the distance grows between you and me I do not understand [Chorus] At my request, you take me in In that tenderness, I am floating away No certainty, nothing to rely on Holding still for a moment What a moment this is Oh for a moment of forgetting, a moment of bliss Heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy I can hear the distant thunder Of a million unheard souls Of a million unheard souls Watch each one reach for creature comfort For the filling of their holes In the blood of Eden Lie the woman and the man With the man in the woman And the woman in the man In the blood of Eden We wanted the union Of the woman and the man In the blood of Eden Lie the woman and the man I feel the man in the woman And the woman in the man In the blood of Eden Lie the woman and the man I feel the man in the woman And the woman in the man In the blood of Eden We've done everything we can In the blood of Eden Saw the end as we began With the man in the woman And the woman in the man It was all for the union Oh, the union of the woman, the woman and the man. The blood of eden keeps running through me running through my veins the blood of eden keeps rushing through me when I'm sure there's none that remains the blood of eden keeps running through me I can feel it in my bones that blood of eden keeps rushing through me taking back what it owns

Eye to Eye

Caitlin — Fri, 05 Jan 2007 09:27:49 GMT

Lover: Tell me Will we ever meet, there in the place that lies beyond all explanation? The place where not a question need rise for the road map has long been flung out the window, the side roads and curved bends the only guide to our joined destination. Will we ever meet, there, in the place of Deliverance from so many eons of loss, and of sorrow where the restless gravesong of the ancestors are at last put to rest in eachothers gaze? Lover, will you meet me? Up where our hearts speak no reason, only Truce And we begin to feel the undeniable coursing of their two rhythmns as one? I miss you I miss you and I haven't even met you You are as close as you are far, Watching you is as watching from below a star traverse across the sky, millions of miles of distance between us and yet you appear but a sidelong glance away... You run before we have even met eye to eye, too quick to follow me below, Into sweet abysses and billowing dreams of yesteryear that go on without end... Lover, can you tell me a bedtime story that will fill my dreams dripping with the promise of a Soul-bent union- a spell no time nor thought nor deed nor whim nor treason nor injustice nor prison nor wall nor explanation could ever ever break? Lover, meet me and yours shall be a lifetime of infinite promise, an eternity of Yes...

A New Year

Caitlin — Wed, 03 Jan 2007 23:56:01 GMT

I want a new song, one at once filled with silence and the deafening call of thunder. I want a song that will urge me out from under rocky weights, awakening me at last to the knowing of the skies. I want a primal song, one that stirs wildly the blood asleep in my veins, one that is neither apologetic nor shy, a song only a warrior truly knows by heart. I want to awake to a new dawn-a dawn crimson with promise, vast with possibility... I want to awake in shivers and in quakes, in the unmistakable triumph of a night spent in daring, impossible communion. I want grace to follow with her silken veils and opalescent curves, her soft spell of virtue, dignity and might an ever ardent companion to my ceaseless desires. I want riches to pour forth from my sorrow, treasure to melt from these eyes, diamond tears the price no man could ever pay, so precious their hope and their promise. I want to speak in riddles bold, walk in mountains untouched and valleys unharmed, I want to listen gently to the dying of the days as they fold into themselves forevermore....I want to hear the song of creation born from my own lips, envelop the stars with my love, dash all fear upon sharp and jagged rocks, I want to know only the intelligence that can be found in not thinking, and spill forth the knowledge uncovered there, in color infinite and song unbound. I want to live, live in the shadow as well as the light, dance in perfect harmony with charging stags and falling star, I want to feel the gentle touch of skin on skin and remember what is is to be true...true to god, true to my own design, true to life as it churns and it churns and it churns. I want to follow no one and seek nothing, watch the countless sands yield beneath my feet and carry the cross of surrender with every step I take, across ship, across sea, across desert and nights alive I roam, until the majestic is the only song left in my bones and god the only lover I have known. With my staff and my sword, this prayer and my heart, I begin. I begin....

A Child Is Born

Caitlin — Mon, 18 Dec 2006 07:40:43 GMT

A child has been born- her skin as soft as all things new-her hair thick with black curls and ancient honey-her tiny cry as soul stirring as a thousand symphonies combined. Her name is Elkannah, she who is possessed by God, daughter of Tirza, the Radiant and Desirable One, my sister. She came through on a quiet day-December 16th 2006-a day that opened sparkling pure with white frost, becoming guache soft grey cloud turned wild contrast of charcoal black on burgeoning white cloud, backed by the incandescent glow of a winters setting sun and a wash of blue-grey distances. The moment she came, just north of her home, I bore awed witness to thousands upon thousands of tiny black birds gathered in a vast dance above the Alexander Valley. They would come together to make shapes like tornadoes, spheres, the flowing silken scarf of a belly dancer, parting clouds. In and out they would move, up and down, in one great union they would swoon together then seemlessly come apart into smaller assemblies, dancing, dancing, the melody of stringed instruments the soundtrack to their welcoming dance. As mother heaved and baby birthed through crevice deep and wide-a warrior soul coming to greet the first brave breath before her, all this I witnessed, the song of the winter and all her mysterious and quiet churnings made illustrious vision of bird dancing for sky dancing for child dancing for my heart to know she was here at last, safely arrived in her mothers arms, into a warm home for her soul to know solace. The beauty of the day evaporated into a night unveiled, a million stars shining for this new tribe sister, Elkannah Audrey Joanna Clementina Scura, she of noble strength, who bears the mercy and the forgiveness of god, who is possessed by god, who comes from the dark....Welcome dear Elkannah-you are so loved!!!!

Logos

Caitlin — Wed, 04 Oct 2006 04:13:17 GMT

Can’t I but dream, of love requitted? Why can’t we stay, here in the folds of love and exhaltation? Here where fear wrestles not with the glory that is rightly our own and only the song of our spirits remain? He is here in my heart-all of them are-the ones I have loved. From the marrow of my bones and the warrior cry of my mortality I have loved them and my spirit is tainted wildly with paints of gold and red and thunder clouds parting and he lives here in my heart. Heaven have mercy-my hands outreached in constant dying…in constant departure, my heart is melting into a thousand liquid lightening bolts and tiny glowing shards of spirits made to be light. And I am breaking apart and all that I have known passes before me in flashes of silver and diamond and I know not where to tread and I know not who to be and I know not my place amongst the shadows nor why I am a haunted and a suffering fool-and I can’t see past the moments and the memories that keep me in their pregnant and seductive gaze and I see no future beyond the laughter of my friends that have kept me whole and bright these past years and I can’t see a future beyond his stare and the quiet murmurs of his touch along my spine….kisses unfolding in a thousand layers of silk and snow melt….And the fire inside that grows wilder-blue are its tendrils and flashing are its medallions of movement and sound. How can I speak all of this? The thousand fold virtue of life, of god, of heaven live here-they live here-the colours too bright to bear, while tears spread like slow honey down my shirt and I cannot see anymore, and I cannot see but for the small torchlight that bears it’s burden across my chest, promising remembrance-a deep and ceaseless embrace. I am hiding, I am quaking, I am dying and being born this day and I make no sense and lullabies and rhythms untapped follow every step close and near and his voice pounds in my chest and I am bleeding, bewildered, broken and fixed. A Grand Cross opens my horizons and spills forth unimaginable fortune-waiting to be tapped-waiting to be spread inside like new skin, like love. This body ripe for tomorrow. I pray a million prayers, all amounting to one and the same-that this love be known that this love be shown that this love live on in temple flesh, abounding river, holy water, my breath. Let shame take a backseat and love light land softly and surely upon my door….

Bowie Lullabies

Caitlin — Fri, 29 Sep 2006 05:43:31 GMT

I I will be king And you You will be queen Though nothing will Drive them away We can beat them Just for one day We can be Heroes Just for one day And you You can be mean And I I'll drink all the time 'Cause we're lovers And that is a fact Yes we're lovers And that is that Though nothing Will keep us together We could steal time Just for one day We can be Heroes For ever and ever What d'you say I I wish we could swim Like the dolphins Like dolphins can swim Though nothing Will keep us together We can beat them For ever and ever Oh we can be Heroes Just for one day I I will be king And you You will be queen Though nothing Will drive them away We can be Heroes Just for one day We can be us Just for one day I I can remember Standing By the wall And the guns Shot above our heads And we kissed As though nothing could fall And the shame Was on the other side Oh we can beat them For ever and ever Then we can be Heroes Just for one day We can be Heroes We can be Heroes We can be Heroes Just for one day We can be Heroes We're nothing And nothing will help us Maybe we're lying Then you better not stay But we could be safer Just for one day