I feel like shit so I am going to whine, so if you don't want to attend my pity party this is your official warning. So after swearing off anything serious relationshipwise, especially after the Davy disaster, this boy, who I thought I knew, and who I thought was everything he said he was (ha ha) came along and things were beautiful, for exactly two weeks. Then boy started to have feelings, real honest to god feelings, Oh My! So boy freaked out, I thought things were through, was depressed, was getting over it, when boy came back, still wanted to be friends, still wanted a relationship someday, but for now wanted space and to take things really slowly. Fine. After a few bumps in the road things are going swimmingly. We hang out once in a while, have fun, everyone is satisfied. Until I start seeing someone else. Not a relationship prospect, partly because I still want to be with the boy above everyone, partly because I am not ready for a serious relationship, and partly cause it's just smarter to take things slowly. Boy is a little jealous, but I tell him to work through it, you break up with someone you no longer have say in whether they are going to date other people. Well then boy decides he does want to be serious, asks me out again, I am happy, this is what
I want. Well then the next day boy makes some questionable comments, leads me to wonder, I ask him, Morning after regrets? with a smile on my face, understanding, we've all said things without fully thinking them through. He freaks out, gets angry, and is now refusing to talk to me, despite having told me so many times before how he is my friend, always there for me, yadda yadda yadda, we've all been there before. So in turn while all of this is going on I am enduring the biggest of all drama queens at work, who is slowly making it unbearable for me to be there. So these things come to a head on the same day, I end up quitting my job, boy is refusing to talk to me, and my good friend and majority of my support network is left at the old job. So now I am jobless, lacking in support, and heartbroken. Because it doesn't matter how many times people tell me the boy is certifiable, beyond damaged goods, he's broken with little chance of repair, I know this on my rational side, but it makes no difference to my emotional side. But this is the last day of my pity party, since tommorow I get to work at a new location, and hopefull don't fall flat on my face. So yeah me.