My Blog

We Won

geomana — Fri, 01 Jun 2007 01:38:21 GMT

In your lies I saw the truths you withhold. In your sighs I saw the love that you sold. In your eyes I saw destiny unfold, and the rest of our past was history. In your fears I saw my courage born. In your tears I saw sanity torn. In your mirrors I saw the masks I’ve worn, and the rest of our future was fate. In your dark dreams I saw wonder. In your high hopes I saw plunder. In your war screams I heard thunder, and the rest was a mystery. In pain I saw your sorrow. In gain I sought to borrow. Insane, I thought tomorrow might carry us both back home. In solitude we prayed. In sanctity we stayed. In suffering we bathed, sealing our history. In you I saw me. In me you saw you. In us we saw truth, and the rest was fate. In you I’m whole. In me you’re free. In us we lost identity. In one step, In one breath, In one death, history. One pulse. One tone. One sky. One home. You. I. We. One.

Déjà View

geomana — Mon, 23 Apr 2007 01:23:48 GMT

Discrepancy déjà vu… Something’s wrong with this view. I’ve seen it twice before, or more, and never was it true. Night terrors and wiring errors electrify perception. My system’s set on self-destruct to kill-off misconception. Reality rendezvous… Am I just a part of you? We’ll live this dream again, it seems, until it passes through. Night pleasures and drastic measures to justify elation. This satisfaction’s what we need to feed our perturbation. Mortality mystery… Is life ever really free? I’ll force death’s hand with will until the keyhole fits the key. Night madness and bittersweet sadness vividify our vision. This destiny is what we need to lead our indecision. Divinity symmetry… Unfolding inside of me. I felt it long ago, though never quite so thoroughly. Night voices and impossible choices test my education. My sanity now rides upon this search for integration.

Watching the Mandala Unfold

geomana — Wed, 14 Mar 2007 07:42:32 GMT

Too many things are falling apart all at once. I fear that if I let go they will all fly away, leaving me as a raw sore spot in the center of a vast nothingness. But perhaps my acquiescence would serve as psycho-physiological glue, binding the various aspects of my life by their common resonance. Certainty can be the quickest path to death, but my lack of it here leaves me fighting constantly for breath. The struggle to maintain a delicate balancing act taking place interpenetratively in a multitude of dimensions keeps me walking the fine line of a razors edge between mountains of wisdom and a sea of abyss. Or is it a lake full of bliss? They can feel quite the same at first, at least until you try to quench your thirst… then you find much quicker than time flows that whatever swims in those waters knows you at a depth previously unfathomable by whatever the you was that you thought you were before being utterly dissolved, revolved, and then resolved into clearer focus by the lens of the eye in the mind of the heart in the temple of the souls reflection. After being stared down by the face of your own infinity, you start to wonder, or at least I did… Where does self end and environment begin? Am I all I will ever know? Am I eternal whirling consciousness motionlessly moving beyond the speed of light, spinning silently with the sound of everything that will ever be blending seamlessly into all that ever was while tied timelessly at a now that will always exist and has always existed? Within this magnificent matrix, am I just a piece of a piece reflecting the reflections of reflections from the source of each fractalized, crystalline container filling and emptying, draining and pouring simultaneously into and out of creation? Am I pure desire, like fire, burning for manifestation within this deadly conscious playground, coming to be then going, intention sparked then growing into whatever I may just to dissipate and disperse back into the universe which holds us all, which drowns us in life, in love, in laughter, in sorrow, in yesterday, today, and tomorrow, and in that time between in which we all dream the existence we participate in? Too many questions remain a mystery. I’d let them all go but for fear of the madness I’d inevitably embrace upon discovery of their true answer. Perhaps it’s the refraction of reality by the prism of my perception, a trick or a twist of the light, nothing more, but from this place in time and space I see a series of windows, not a door. I see a kaleidoscopic panorama of possibilities and an evolving imagination relentlessly pursuing the expression of an endless variety of existences through the unified interface of chaos and consciousness. I see the earth growing old, and a sea of oscillating eyes watching the mandala unfold.

Choices

geomana — Fri, 09 Mar 2007 23:36:53 GMT

You chose to see what you wanted to see, regardless of the truth that stood staring you down. You chose to be who you wanted to be, regardless of the you that you knew you should’ve found. Now you lay broken. Fate has spoken, and the unending winds of change have blown through. Where once we were merged, our paths have diverged, and the we that was us has become me and you. I should have known what would soon be my own, if I played with a fire that burns to the soul. I could have seen the results of my dreams, but it seems that desire has sucked me down a hole. Now I lay broken. Fate has spoken, and the unending winds of change have blown through. Where once I was strong, I now sing a song thick with echoes of pain and ironies of truth.

Chronos

geomana — Thu, 23 Nov 2006 17:36:52 GMT

Time is leaking, and bleeding all over me. It's so smooth and liquid as it pours across my skin. Boundaries are blurring and I can't say just where you end and I begin. Was it always pain or pleasure? I can't seem to let go. But I feel divinity in the flow as I drift away. Time is draining, and the future is haunting me. It's so familiar as it creeps into my past. Memories fade every day, and each one consumes the last. Was it always now or never? I can't seem to recall. But I see the irony in it all as I slip away.

Wailing Grey World

geomana — Tue, 26 Sep 2006 05:50:11 GMT

Watching the wailing grey world beneath as I leap with oblivious encompassing arms, Delicate tendrils blossom desperate encasements of liquid to hold in their palms. Unknown symbols emerge from the light as ambient creatures of silence unfold. Union impregnates invisible chasms with bridges of manifestations untold. Weaving the whirling colors within as an infinite expression of all that revolves, Infusions of visions and sound draw me in past the nexus where space/time dissolves. And as I float on a cloud in the sky of my mind to the farthest edges of dreams divine, I see with the eye that feels with the soul which grasps with heart the living design.

Nobility is slavery

geomana — Sun, 07 May 2006 17:54:48 GMT

Suck up your pride all you like, but don’t claim honor to me. I won’t be the one to tell you Nobility is slavery. Despite my lack of interest, I’ll feed you false sincerity until your image sucks you dry and leaves your mind in poverty. I’ll cater to your fevered thoughts, regardless of my apathy, and when your kingdom falls apart, I’ll photograph your misery. So suck up pleasure while you can, but do not claim integrity. My tolerance is decreasing inversely to hostility. One wrong word and I just may be forced to set you free, to show you what it means to say Nobility is slavery.

Eternal Eyes

geomana — Thu, 20 Apr 2006 21:32:16 GMT

Eternal eyes seeing far into the frame of things perceive existence in a way that weaves an endless connection. Boundaries become relations within the encompassing embrace of unity and arguments are agreements in a wordless world of wisdom.

Summation of Forces = 0

geomana — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 03:44:00 GMT

Equilibrate the chaos, if you can. Chances are, you won’t get far in this thickening plot. Each step becomes heavier than the last, and each breath resonates with a whisper from the past. Try harder and you might fall faster. It may be best to just let it go. Possessions can be prisons in this twisted circus sideshow. It started out so sweet in this life. The sun rose, the sky turned red, and then you saw it coming. You caught a glimpse of the face of existence, and it stared indifferently into your souls core. Struggle and hide to get out of this ride, but you’re coming along just the same. Some learn sooner than others, that this show is not a game. Give and take what you can, while you can. Before long, the sun will set, and all will see it coming. We will each breathlessly watch the unfolding, as our lives are consumed by the unfathomable. To acquiesce to luminescence, to allow time to pull us in, could be our chance to understand that the end is where we all begin.

Be or else

geomana — Sat, 18 Mar 2006 18:44:32 GMT

Wade through the muck that is what was to get to what will be in time to be here now again for the first time before it's too late and the never meant to be catches up with hopeful dreams leaked while dying during birth. Allow invisible boundaries to dissolve between fingers while trying to touch the indivisible lattice before they crawl like worms into eyes and ears and strangle brains with inane restrictive prisons. See past the edge of the sun into the luminescent essence to view that which shines with invisible radiance before eyes cover absence of sight with blankets of light that blind what can be felt with the soul. Live life loved and love life lived to feel fully the eternal beating heart pumping intention into the inanimate before regretful contempt snags serenity and drags vitality from the tranquil center of peace and acceptance. Taste of the nectar which pours from the fruit of the flower that blooms on the vine which weaves us as one before the chance to dances away leaving flesh to decay and blow in the breeze as timeless sand.

Razormouth

geomana — Mon, 06 Mar 2006 17:10:52 GMT

When I was young, fractured spindles of rose-less thorns crawled desperately up my spine, drinking time in like some sweet black abyss. With holes for eyes and stumbling full speed into a sea of silently screaming souls, I swam in a lucid fever for what seemed an eternity. Occasionally, I awoke and felt the light of divinity shining upon my intricate vessel; always to wake again... ideals ripped from my skull like skin from my face. The brutality of reality was hammered into my mentality. As I aged, mirrors disguised as butterfly wings tore razors from my mouth with such sudden animalistic anguish, such a fanged ferocity, that it was as if my tongue had been stabbing and slicing since long before the beginnings of my birth. I grew against gravity and so did the claws inside me that ripped my throat open widely, releasing screams of blood that purged me of that urgent flood so bitterly sweet as it poured ripe from my mind, born from my brain like a child, yet utterly wild, vicious and viscous, cavernous yet ravenous for the dimming glow of a choking culture. Crystal clear nostalgia for a world long destroyed lurched from my abdomen, shredding savagely at walls of fire and false desire, tearing frantically at the fattening fallacies and tantalizing trickery that birth disfunctional phantom flesh pods which lick liquid lies glazed setting their eyes ablaze with a repression they can't quite see. This flirting with the hell realms of the collective primate mind; this nurturing of fetal time bombs for systematic self destruction; this shameless mutilation of the sacred reconstruction is aimed directly down the throat of human kind. These tunnels of thought are covered in webs of deception, pitfalls of perception, paths lined with ingenious devious traps entangling lives and then dangling knives over their skin as if their stomachs aren't already overflowing with willingly ingested poison. When will the wordless truths consume this abrasive, corrosive, composition, so beautiful in its erosion, so peaceful in its decay? When will the madness cease to be, that which is you and me, and it, isolated in existence, suspended in an equation, torn by the invisible fingers of our own minds from the mysterious matrix of manifestation? Oscillations of brilliant vibrations call us silently towards unification, increasing in intensity as the magnetic pull of tran-sensual enigmas deepen, sinking seductively into the fertile pools of mutation we have cooperatively filled with the ethereal fluids of our limitless imaginations. We hang in the threads of a delicate balance, woven intricately by the infinite as a vast and evolving expression of universal self-awareness, a masterpiece sculpture of intentions, ideas, motions and emotions, culminating towards a peak experience of ecstatic equilibrium, rendering the individual so vastly insignificant and yet so vitally important. I have no choice, I suppose, but to continue bleeding from my eyes and mouth and heart, so red and raw from passionate outbursts of compassionate anger, until I have drained myself and my purpose in this life, back into the encompassing arms of the earth from which I sprang.

The Universe

geomana — Sat, 18 Feb 2006 05:26:48 GMT

Touch this gem. Feel its cold, smooth, indifference? It doesn’t care about you and it never will. This fact compounds the geometric electricity of its divine design, to reflect with crystal clarity, the ruthless nature of existence. Beautiful beyond boundary, Profound without reason, and yet as maddeningly meaningless as the fluttering by of an utterly non-dual butterfly, resting on a flower in the eye of its mind, to find that they are one and the same. Listen hard. Hear the spaces between the sounds? They speak in tongues unheard by ears of flesh. These songs pacify the moments passing by, by humming with an eerie alien intelligence, harmonic tones of resonant timelessness. Creative beyond brilliance, Destructive without purpose, And yet as passionately playful as the shimmering dreams of an ancient wild-eyed child, immersed in a garden in the eye of its mind, not knowing they are one and the same. Look at me. Do you see me looking at you? Our eyes view only what we allow them to. This tedious game of seeing ourselves through the projected thoughts of others, rejects with harsh hostility, the encompassing nature of our existence. Tragic beyond tears, Magic without the tricks, And as movingly infinite as the vast sea of souls indivisibly interwoven, that we’ve chosen unknowingly in the eye of our mind, to forever be one and the same.

Jewel

geomana — Mon, 16 Jan 2006 18:03:28 GMT

We are all unique functions of the infinitely faceted jewel, each reflecting reflections in the only way we can. Our free will is our fate and yet we have never been nor can we ever be anything more or less than what we are at any given moment.

Enterplay

geomana — Mon, 16 Jan 2006 01:44:01 GMT

Walking through a garden of glass, sublime scintillations mesmerize me in the morning moon, reflecting with perfection aquamarine dreams, and violet frost on a canopy of blue. Sapphires spring forth from my eyes as the daze deepens. Frozen frame of a mortal moment. Gaping like an ape at the wonder of this world, and wandering on in a whirl of spirals. Emerald flames feasting on crimson grass, suspiciously seductive, hypnotize me with their silent tune. Dancing in a trance, naked to the soul, and guided by the infinite smile. Back beneath an obsidian sky, turquoise tear drops crystallize on my luminous skin, showing with a glow the universal flow, and the harmony in unity of being.