Still more...

::thinking intensely:: "And it's true you're a bit like me but you're a lot like you and I'm not like you and you're not like me but I'm the same as you and you're the same as me and you're a lot like you but you're a bit like me but you're a lot like you and I'm not like you and you're not like me and you're a bit like me but you're a lot like you. I'll tell you what I'll do; I'll listen and it's true you're a bit like me but you're a lot like you. I'll tell you what I'll do I'll listen. The lessons lately I've learned now it's your turn I think you've earned your freedom. Forgive me I was a fool and I might be older than you but I certainly aint no wiser. Come now rest your head ease your mind and I'll fight for you instead and it's true you're a bit like me and you're a lot like you. I'll tell you what I'll do; I'll, I'll listen. Lessons lately I've learned now I think it's your turn I think you've earned your freedom. The times they get so strange; friends like brothers, friends like brothers and the times they tend to change; brothers into friends..." -Tiga
Music is meant to move the soul and I thought of you when I heard this song. It has much meaning to me and I hoped it would have meaning in your life as well...
I wish I could tell you everything I think but I lack to words in so many respects. I'll try though...
I'm a lover and a trusting person. I love because I love myself and I trust because I trust myself. I'm a person who feels I have nothing to hide. I cannot express to you how much you have given me hope that there are other people like me in this world. I connected to you on so many levels and I admire and respect you. I will always admire and respect you because of the person you are...because of the person I am:) The only true constant in this world is change and I believe ability of people changing. I want people to make their own decisions and will never hold anyone's decision against them; only hold them accountable for their decisions. I only have a few expectations in life...
I expect each person to live to the fullest potential especially myself. I expect people to be honest not only with other people but themselves. I also expect everyone to love themselves. I try to teach by example and used to wonder why people liked me so much. I realized it's because I live the way I want to live and I'm a happy person and I've never judged those around me. I only hope that they will learn to live the same (all people). I feel very much that you are the same way and hold some of the same truths and I see that you live your life very shamelessly and happily. This attracts me to you as a person and you have gained my loyalty and will always have a friend who would go to the ends of the earth to be there with you no matter what. I deeply care about you and always will. I want you to always know that I will try to understand you. I don't know if you feel like you said too much the other night or what you really are feeling today. All I know if how you felt the last time I talked with you. I take that for what it is. I'm that kind of person who will believe what you tell me at the time you tell me and will think of only that until told otherwise. Change happens day by day though and I'm always prepared for what ever change may happen each day. I love unconditionally but I don't expect those around me to do the same. It's not something that comes easy to people or is easy for them to accept from another person. I was blessed as a child to have both received and learned how to give unconditional love. This is one of the gifts I hope to leave with the world when I pass. Most of all I want you to know this so that when I tell you I love you it's not because I think you're beautiful and wonderful or because I expect you to love me in return but simply because I do love you and that's just it...love. Love is not something to take; it's something you give and I give it to you freely and for free. I always want you to feel loved and I always want you to be happy...I hope to always make you feel that way. I really hope that you can understand what I'm saying. I'm trying really hard to explain it and I don't know if it's coming out right. I know my heart's in the right place. I wish you many wonderful things and will always think of you. You really are a blessed, wonderful and beautiful person (inside and out)
P.S. you will always make me smile

Don't pierce my heart...

So I'm up to six piercings now and I plan on much more. Word to the wise they're very addictive :) I also am working on the design for my next tattoos. I'm coming out of my shell like a bad ass from hell. since I'm not dating I figured that now is a great time to get body mods because there's no problem with the down time caused be most of them. I also must praise my piercer for his technique and ability to make it almost painless. Dustin, who pierces for Brainstorm tattoo in Fayetteville, AR is highly recommended by me and everyone else who he has pierced.

No more nightmares...just sing to me.

I once knew a girl
In the years of my youth
With eyes like the summer
All beauty and truth
In the morning I fled
Left a note and it read
Someday you will be loved.

I cannot pretend that I felt any regret
Cause each broken heart will eventually mend
As the blood runs red down the needle and thread
Someday you will be loved

You'll be loved you'll be loved
Like you never have known
The memories of me
Will seem more like bad dreams
Just a series of blurs
Like I never occurred
Someday you will be loved

You may feel alone when you're falling asleep
And everytime tears roll down your cheeks
But I know your heart belongs to someone you've yet to meet
Someday you will be loved

You'll be loved you'll be loved
Like you never have known
The memories of me
Will seem more like bad dreams
Just a series of blurs
Like I never occurred
Someday you will be loved

You'll be loved you'll be loved
Like you never have known
The memories of me
Will seem more like bad dreams
Just a series of blurs
Like I never occurred
Someday you will be loved
Someday you will be loved

-- "Someday you will be loved" Death Cab for Cutie

And thus I am born..

All I ever wanted was to pick apart the day and put the peices back my way.
-A.R.

Once again I claim my confidence back, my beauty back, my life back. Don't let those around you take what you have. Don't let the crooks of life rob you of what makes you-you. It's easier to think that your just following the advice of others but, don't forget that you are the olny person that can break you. Just becuase they had you the weapon doesn't mean that you have to use it. Don't forget how simple life really is and that nothing's as complicated as it seems and everything happens for a reason (so cliche', I know). These little reminders to ourselves and those around us are what keeps us going sometimes. Don't forget to tell those you love that- you love them :) Don't be afraid to be honest, it's really not that painful. Put your emotions on the line and watch where they go. It's okay to be happy and it's okay to be sad just don't let your life slip out of your hands.

Life's not a bitch, life's a beautiful woman you only call her a bitch because she won't let you get that pussy. Maybe she didn't feel y'all shared any similar interests, or maybe you're just an asshole who couldn't sweet talk the princess.
A.R.

The Knight of Cups

In times of darkness there is always the light of my heart. I've dated several people in my time but there have only been two times in which I was in love. We all know what it's like to be in love no matter how hard we try to deny it. This second time is upon me now and for once I don't feel like it's going to hurt me. I do not have access to this person that I love though that does not bother me either. I am satisfied knowing that I can still love no matter what. Real love is different than any other thing on the face of this planet and to know that I am capable of this reasures me that the world is not desolate as I had once thought it was. rejoyce in the existence no matter how it may be hidden or denied from us. celabrate our capability not our failures and we shall be happy.

Turn the face a stray...

There are only so many things that a person can handle...Like being caught in the limbo of love. Stuck in that point between feelings and words. If I could only tell the person then, I could cure my limbo but, I'm not quite ready to cure ill fated rejection (if that be the case). I would almost rather spend the rest of my life here in love without the chance of ever falling out or finding out for that matter. I shall bide the sea of turmoil and find a nice sandy beach far from everything to live out my loving life and never forget who I am.

Trees

Numa Numa iei!
There is hope in the world!
Metal music feeds a part of me.
If anyone knows of any psy artist with heavy guitar, remixes and such I would appriciate if the info got passed my way :)

First time for everything

Finally I got booked. I didn't get booked for spinning Psytrance, my main misstress, but instead I span some 80's dance! I had a lot of fun and it was great having so many of my friends there.
Thanks Guys!

when things go...

I can't even begin to sum up everything that's happened to me in the past two months. It's been more than just a rollercoaster and I"m just hoping that there's another turn in the rail...maybe one that goes up for a little while atleast. I'm not really worried for all things work out like they're are supposed to. It's always hard to see what's ahead though but, the point is to remember that there is a place ahead of everything that's happening now. I am trying to remind myself of how beautiful the world is so I ask of you that are my friends to please post any moment in your life that reminds you of true beauty. It's the little things that count so don't leave out the trivial things, let's all remember together.
I love you guys,
Little Miss Yonnie