Plokk inks

How does one love themselves?

   Sun, July 5, 2009 - 9:12 AM
new post
Re: Oh great Universe
Yesterday, 7:44 PM
there is always hope. :)

it takes practice, you need to love yourself every day. and every day it gets easier. love yourself, honor yourself, cherish yourself, and change.

First off what is love? You may have your own definition of love I never have figured out mine.. my sister compared it to chocolate donuts she says I love Chocolate donuts and I love my husband.. they arent the same but I love them..both..

Well I love chocolate donuts and my hips will concur

I have never had a husband so I dont know that kind

and my parental love consisted of accepting corporal punishment and the bloody welts on my ass as proof of that love.

I have a couple kids who I think I love, I accept them for who they are and I try not to make their lives the living hell mine has been. They think of me once in a while and thank me once in a while but one doesnt care that my bankcard doesn't have his name on it and I dont have the money in it for him to sign up for yahoo internet chat porn, and will lie to cover his tracks.. so where is the love there?

I think I love photography but not everyone likes my photographs and most of the time I dont really either if only I had a better camera I could love that too? no I would find something wrong with it..

Please tell me how the hell I'm supposed to love myself when I dont even know what it is...
If you think that Plokk has lost her nugget and is a freakin whiner please dont post a reply



12 Comments

add a comment
Sun, July 5, 2009 - 9:43 AM
I'm sorry.
I just read the Title and started playing with myself.
Wait...what was the question?!
KK
Unsu...
 
Sun, July 5, 2009 - 2:11 PM
its the same question i have asked myself over and over again, hang in there!
Sun, July 5, 2009 - 3:32 PM
You haven't lost yer nugget :P Most everyone struggles with this thought, I think. I know I do! Sometimes it's difficult to accept oneself, let alone love. You're not alone, hang in there :)
Sun, July 5, 2009 - 4:47 PM
Funny KK bonkin yourself dont count.. most of the time it doesnt count if you have a living breathing partner.. or is that love? I dont think so..

I'm trying really hard to manifest something different.. something real I didnt even go out last night to watch fireworks.. there were just too many yahoos outside my window all day.. .lighting M80s or cannons.. whatever the hell... and of course the startle response was in high freakin gear.. and yeah Im still hangin in here... I dont want to hang in I want to freakin live!
Mon, July 6, 2009 - 8:24 PM
I love your photographs! And I believe photos show us both what is pictured and who is behind the shutter.

There's a lottta heart in those photos of yours. :)

Loving myself mainly means forgiving myself. And sometimes being forgiven by others. And especially with family, it means that some time after I messed up, I went "Oh crap!" and felt really bad about it, and was forgiven. And it works both ways, even though it can sometimes take time.

Forgiveness is unconditional love. :)
Tue, July 7, 2009 - 12:00 AM
What the hell do I have to forgive myself for? when I screw up I totally take responsibility for it and apologize and then move on from that.. I dont hate myself for my errors .. as a matter of fact I usually find the blessing even if its really teensy tiny.. or really screwed up.. but a blessing nonetheless.. maybe thats what loving myslef is.. well ok Ive been doing that for along time I still do it even when Im this freakin depressed? anxiety ridden mess... the blessing is all of you.. and the words even if they dont make sense right now you came and entered my life when I needed you thats a blessing...
Tue, July 7, 2009 - 8:50 AM
I don' t think it's a task or a goal one can set for oneself, even upon the strong recommendation of others. I think there is a process involved that starts with accepting one's self, with all the lumps and warts and poorly timed farts...accepting just as you accept that some days it'll rain, and that roses don't always have any scent. One must also manifest care of one's Self, whether that is feeding the meat body appropriately or keeping the psyche away from volatile situations. One must care for one's self at least as responsibly as one would care for a pet or small child. People do things to themselves (and to others) that they would never do to a dog... :-(

Love just grows; it cannot be studied, emulated, enforced, commanded to appear. It's not shy, though; and if you make a place for it you just might turn and find it sitting quietly by your side while you were peering restlessly out the window and waiting impatiently for it to knock on the door of your heart.

{{{Plokk}}}
Tue, July 7, 2009 - 2:25 PM
I find that the huge amount of self-hatred and loathing I have is baseless, when I look at it objectively. Certainly, I fall far short of the glory of my Maker, and am in dire need of improvement in almost every regard. But I realized the other day that I would love to have friends such as me- and I DO- I'm so blessed and rich in friends and love from others that I'm delusional to NOT love myself- how could so many delightful, amazing people be wrong?

That the love I receive comes in forms other than that which I most desire is regrettable, surely, but at least I AM loved- and there's no least about that!!

The times I've been closest to suicide- and usually I've been very lucid and emotionless- the thing that finally breaks me down to tears and makes me put the gun away is finally feeling sympathy for MYSELF. It's bizarre that I have so very much- nigh limitless- love and respect and compassion for EVERYONE: everyone but me. Yet when I can view myself as THE OTHER- as another soul met on the long hard journey of consciousness- that's the beginning of rebuilding my self-worth and seeing myself as worthy. Strange, huh?

It's a challenge to love myself, but I, too, am a beloved child of the Universe, worthy of love, special, and with something to contribute. Where this massive self-hate came from, I have no idea, but until I find and release it, I shall likely always be burdened with its pain and suffering, which I do not deserve, and which serves me not at all.

Best-wishingly, Love-and-Lightingly,
Major Tom
Tue, July 7, 2009 - 4:59 PM
You guys rock! really !
Wed, July 8, 2009 - 5:05 PM
I love this very much---
www.crimethinc.com/tools/po...s_big.gif
---and have the actual poster on the wall near my desk.

Also, if you have never read it, www.lordtonymackenzie.com/desid...a.html , you might want to put this up somewhere that your eyes rest frequently. It's been an excellent touchstone for me for many years, and I still like to recite it aloud periodically. Used to read it aloud to myself in the mirror every morning....
Sat, July 11, 2009 - 7:24 AM
Hmmm...loving oneself....never been so good at that one. Its hard when you have been programmed to do the opposite. And where is a true and honest depiction of love in this world?
I wish you all the best, my dear. I wish you love.
From the deepest part of yourself....I know its there....put on your clam diggers....get out your gloves and start digging.
Sat, July 11, 2009 - 7:30 AM
beautiful post Ambivert. Thank you.