La Vita Mia Manifestato

My Life Manifested...
Its funny to look back at the first blog entries that I wrote this year. I thought it would only be a summer away... and its unfolded to be a completely different life and path than I thought it would take. It feels as though I never know what is going to be presented to me from the One.
I'll be returning to the states for the holidays, and I must say that I am really excited. I miss little things... like cheerio's...but i miss other bigger things... like sunshine (i've been in the uk for 3 months)... but mostly... i miss my friends.
I have a few very dear friends here.... but I definitely am due for a fix from my friends in the states.
Then in January, back to Italy. Spending the winter snowboarding... falling in love again (with the country and maybe even a boy!)...and after that...
well... thats a secret for now...

Attenzioni Regazzi!

Well, I have made my final decision. I went to London only two weeks ago to get a job...found work...e poi (and now) my decision to stay in Europe is final.
I will be staying here beyond my expected parting date of 7 August and instead, I will leave for London on this day... I will stay there for 3 weeks, working and then return to the states only to sell my car, furniture and cancel the lease on my apartment.

My time here in Italy has given me a liberty that I have never understood before. The liberty, and the freedom to CHOOSE...
I am so excited for my life...
A little scared and nervous for such a huge change in my life...
But still very excited.
Vi amo!!! I love you all!
Jasmyn

Io Amo Mia Vita

This isn't going to be long, because I'd rather wait a month, but I have to say:
I love this country...
The kind of love that wraps your heart in a smile and is released with tears of joy cooling your cheeks...

Una Settimana!

Una settimana!
I have one week to go before I take off for beautiful Italia! It seems as though its approaching so fast...

Florence, Roma, Sorrento, Pompeii, Positano...wow...

I am very grateful for the abundance of beauty I have in my life and the abundance I have in store for me!

Its surreal, but becoming more and more real hour by hour...

What a beautiful life I live.

Thank you Universe

A Healing Fault Is Open

I am getting very excited and a bit anxious for Roma! I found my flat and will be staying with a lovely lady out there.
My excitement isn't just for the simplaecemente vida, but even more so for what emotionally and spiritually I will experience while out there.
The freedom from my dramas.
It seems that no matter how many changes you make in your own life, there are more of the same dramas that like to repeat in your life. The only thing that changes is how you react to them and how you percieve them.
My best choices have been not to react. But to respond. Responding has allowed me to take responsibility of the circumstances in my life. Gives me a sense of control while allowing me the freedom of offering the steering wheel to others.
But to go somewhere that I don't know anyone and can truly start fresh...not only fresh in my relationships, but in the way that I communicate. I may actually learn something about communicating much more smoothly...haha...without rambling. I won't have room to ramble if I don't know the vocabulary.

The cleanse I am on now is an emotional cleanse as well as physical. Cleanse the wound to stop the festering, so I can heal. "A healing fault is open now."
I truly feel that I am rising from the ashes...
A season of passion and a season of passage...

Come What May

So maybe I was ready, maybe not...
I played "Come What May Tonight". Our song.

I remember when I first moved into my new place, the song came in my mind and I started singing it. It was the first time that I cried. I had to lean against the counter, because even though I had to leave...it still hurts.
It hurts to know that I had the kind of love that was in that song once... and that it had faded.
I suppose though, that it still applies. Until the end of time, I will love him. We may not be together. We may not be compatible.
But I will love him...I wil miss him...I will remember him.

I remember the first time I heard the song I cried the same. We were apart, but together. In different towns, but in love. I have to say...the pain felt the same... I guess that its the pain of knowing you aren't with the person you thought you'd spend the rest of your life with...
This pain is different though. The hope that makes me want to get through the pain isn't the hope that I will be with him again....its knowing that the pain fades to nostalgia...and into contentment...and into happiness...into flight

Modesto bello piacere

I just got back to the UK from Italia. And ohh, i never knew what being in love was until I fell in love with that country. Fireworks at the airport when the plane was landing in Napoli, the food that made me melt in my chair with every bite, the chocolate desert that we actually licked the plate, the chilled wine with every meal, the sun that gave me color even when it was cloudy, the colors of the buildings that show through even in my black and white sketches, the men that look in my eyes as they offer me "complimenti"....everything so beautifully romantic, and wonderfully simple and perfectly beautiful and balanced.

Inspiring me to be artistically expressive in anyway possible. Singing, dancing, drawing, poetry... and the best art of all, the italian art of "Belle di niente" beauty of doing nothing....

A country where even when you are eating your secondi (second course) at lunch you are planning what you are going to have for dinner (all 4 courses). The country that every bite of their margherita pizzas is like the last kiss you give a lover before you say "arrividerci bella" knowing you won't see them again, except with the food, you still have a whole plate left, and 2 more courses to follow! Never indulging so much that you say "i can't take in anymore" you only say "why won't it fit? what can i consume to make more room?"... and the night before you leave, i was sad just wondering "what I am I going to eat for the next 90 nights before I return to this country?

a country that the hillsides put that love drunk look in my eyes and my smile, so obvious that I even notice it without seeing it....i know i wear the expression though...which makes me love the country more, and express the intoxication even deeper

and not to mention Signore Pasquale whom I didn't exactly meet on the airplane, but yet the relation created could have been written by an 18th century author (had their been airplanes and passport control back then). Just simply to romantic. Pasquale is the person that the only thing he's even said to me is "I will be awaiting your email." in a deep italian accented voice, after slyly passing his email address to me on a napkin...

beauty is my life

Manifesto Estate

Well I'm getting really excited about my summer plans. I'm leaving the desert heat for the beautiful country of Italy for a couple months. Although I haven't bought my ticket yet, I've decided to go for two months. I know its a long time, but if I want to really be learning the language, I need to commit to that much time. Spiritually, I think 2 months is a good length of time to have time to adapt to the culture and move on to enjoying your environment.

I picked up the book "Eat, Pray, and Love: One Woman' Search for Everything Across Italy, India and Indonesia." today. Its remarkable how similar our hearts are. Its helping my anticipation for my journeys to read of someone else that already went through the same romantic dramas (even more intense in fact), spiritual questioning and questing, and introverted conversations to have peace in her life. To help ease the tears that come to her at night. I'm highly inspired!

And highly excitable :)