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What: Dr. Sketchy's Anti-Art School, Barbary Coast

When: Sunday, January 28, 2007, 4-7pm

Where: The Stud, 399 - 9th Street @ Harrison, San Francisco

Who: Bombshell Betty modeling. Hosted by Thomas S. Roche and Ponygirl.

Dr. Sketchy's Anti-Art School is a burlesque-influenced figure drawing salon that occurs twice-monthly at locations worldwide. Founded in 2005 in New York by ill-disciplined inkster Molly Crabapple and spreading like a bad case of the oh-la-la's to London, LaLaLand and points beyond, Dr. Sketchy's is what happens when Cabaret meets art school, with drinking and drawing contests, retro-porno giveaways, slutty jazz music and wicked dancing to tart things up a bit. Dr. Sketchy's Barbary Coast is organized by Thomas Roche and Ponygirl.

For the launch of Dr. Sketchy's Barbary Coast on January 28, you can ogle the sensuous curves of Bombshell Betty, one and only purveyor of Burlesquercize and well-known bump-n-grinder about town.

Not only will Betty be posing for your figure-drawing delectation -- she will perform a burlesque number that will knock your socks to the rafters, Bub. Prepare to spend several hours attempting (unsuccessfully) to stuff your tongue back in your mouth, capiscio?

All manner of artists are invited to attend Dr. Sketchy's and draw the esteemed Bombshell Betty: sultry sketchers, irascible illustrators, pen-and-ink pervs, and Adobe artistes, as well as the wielders of wicked watercolor and prurient pastels.

If you're not an artist but just dress like one, slap on your beret, comb that pencil moustache, snuggle into your black leather jacket with the latex Lou Reed and come on down for a drink and a dance. More importantly, non-artists will help judge the Dr. Sketchy's Barbary Coast Illustration Contest, perhaps the only figure drawing contest in San Francisco where the winner gets -- you guessed it! -- porn. Prizes will be provided by Eros Zine (eros-zine.com, also cohost Roche's day job).

Sketchy founder Crabapple tangoed onto this slippery slope of debaucherous drawing because after uncounted months as a brazen hussy posing salaciously before septugenarian shutterbugs, she asked herself -- and here I quote -- to discover "Where was the booze-and-hot-chicks fantasy so many of us went to art school for?" Where, Molly -- where, indeed?

Now, something over a year later, disaster ensues for the morals of the Left Coast with the advent of Dr. Sketchy's Barbary Coast, San Francisco's entry into the how-skimpy-are-my-pasties contest that seems to be about the only current East-West rivalry not inspired by an SNL skit.

Dr. Sketchy's: where your soul will assuredly be forfeit to the addictive curves of pencil-drawn cleavage, and you'll find your spiral into depravity soundly greased by the texture of a conte crayon. Don't blame us: We tried to warn you, Picasso.