I perceive jealousy to be the worst of all human emotions.

When an EE student has great trouble with a concept that I myself find second nature, why do I feel jealous? I get it. They don't. I've got something they want. So why the jealousy?

Is it because their worship at the alter of higher education will grant them things I have no access to? Probably. But do I really want those things? Do I even know what they are?

Why do I feel jealous? I know the concept. They don't. I even try to help them understand the concept. If there were jealousy in such an exchange, shouldn't the jealousy be theirs? Why is it mine?

Is it even jealousy? Is it something else masquerading as jealousy?

Feh.

Finish the wine. Read another chapter in one of the books. Go to bed. Tomorrow the wiring will still need pulling. Who better to pull it than me?

Two months since last entry.

Lots of things happening, but too little time to journal them.

Laird Dubh was diagnosed with bone cancer. We're just *barely* able to afford treatment. Vet had to amputete. It is truly astounding how fast and how well he adapted to tripedal locomotion. Lots and lots of emotional distress involved in deciding what to do - but that stage is past and done. He's more than halfway through chemo now. Dogs fare much better than humans with that as well. He's a happy dog!

Wife does *not* have cancer. Took a while to be sure. She's still going in for MRI and other tests on a monthly basis just in case. She had a pulmanary imbolism last time they did surgury, so the Doc wants to avoid cutting again if possible. Fine by me. Wife and I have agreed: instead of major surgury next year, we are going to visit the UK. Airfare & hotels will cost less than co-pay, and the food will be much much better.

Electronics projects are on hold. Unhappy about that, but no cure for it.

Smithy projects moving ahead - in fact...
My most superb wife gifted me with a registration at this years's ABANA conference up in Seattle! Four days of learning from some of the best living smiths! And a chance to see an old friend or two as well.

Going to attempt my first clay-coated blade this week. Going to try to get a pretty pattern near the edge - assuming it doesn't snap into three pieces during the quench.

Haitus at work after an even busier than normal period. Timing for it sucks - we'll just barely be able to avoid a cash-flow crisis at home. Should be some work to do when I get back from the conferene, though.

Our little Galadriel is getting her paws wet, so to speak, in AKC show rings. No points yet, but coming real close. We're working with her, attempting to get her to *show* in the ring instead of *playing* in the ring. When she does stack, she stacks beautifully. She just needs to stack instead of tyring to play with the judge. She also needs to trot instead of jumping and trying to play.

She'll get there. And she'll start gaining points quickly when she does. She's a spectacular example of a deerhound. (She's also a cuddly sweetheart and a mischivious clown!)

Got invited to a big dinner at a rural Oregon spread during a dog-show near Merlin. About two dozen deerhounds running around a half-acre fenced back yard. Now THAT was a party!!! They would *swarm* up onto the deck - most of them not bothering to lay paw onto step - and then back off again. Everybody present was a deerhound owner, so the impromptu pack had a fully appreciative audience.

Finished "The Protectors War" by Steve Sterling. I like Steve's work. Finished "Medalon" by Jennifer Fallon. Good enough to get me to buy the sequil. Finished a couple of old Jack Chalker novels.

Studying the history of technolgy. Studying freemasonry and the history of the Knifhts Templar. Reading a little about woodworking. Still studying metallurgy (of course).

Accomplishements: The knives I make are starting to look remarkably like knives; Dynamite anniversary weekend on the beach; Quality time with an old friend; Re-orgainsation of almost 20% of the library; Continuing improvements to Wife's vending booth.

Still to do: Repairs, repairs, and repairs... I sometimes think this house is falling apart faster than I can nail it back together; NICET preparation; Re-organise rest of library; Re-organise shops.

In the hopper: Coursing practice with Galadriel; Lapidary; Getting electronics projects back on the front burner.

Broken rib hurts.

At least it doesn't hurt as much as when I broke it. After more than a week now its down to a dull ache most of the time. No wrap or anything, just pain pills. Doc says they don't wrap broken ribs anymore - found out that restricted breating interferes with the healing process.

At least the goofy pills let me sleep. I was even able to lay on my right side for a little while last two nights. Can't drive or work when on the goofy pills, though.

Work.

Yeesh.

At least the bills are going to get caught up, but I'm loosing track of what day it is. Too many twelve and fifteen hour swing shifts in a row. At least I had tonight off.

Odd, tonight. (Just misspelled "tonight" wrong three different ways. These goofy pills are potent.) I'd like to just go to bed, but then my sleep schedule would be fucked up for the rest of the week's work.

Staying in hotels these days. At least the company pays for clean and comfortable ones.

It's a gooood company to work for. They're real people, just like me. (Except for the salesman, but what do you want?)

Looking foreward to some fun time before too awful long. Taking four days at the coast digging for agates. Going to try & sneak in some shop time before then as well.

There's a knife that needs polishing and a handle. (Got the handle designed, just need to slice & drill the wood & bronze and get going on it.) There's an induction heating unit lacking only a variac (should come in the mail in a week or two) that begs for my attention. There are also some beads to be made out of some slabs sitting on the bench.

And brewing has fallen behind as well. Can't let that continue or we'll be limited to purchased wine & beers. Maybee we'll make some wine Thursday night...

I may never get the hang of this "Journaling" stuff. Then again, I might...

Accomplished this and previous week:
Average of two stores per day cabled. Good work. Phase One of "Project Saphire" is complete. Phase II scheduled for late March or early April.
A bit of progress on the metallurgy chapter.

Not Accomplished this and previous week:
All work and no play makes Lee a Dull Boy.
Not enough progress on the metallurgy chapter.

Accomplished Yesterday:
Finalised math for Villiard Cascade & Purchased some caps on eBay.
Lion's share of work on math & layout of spark-gap oscillator.

Not Accomplished Yesterday:
Didn't do a lick on the isotransformer.
Couldn't find the diodes I need on eBay, Electronic Goldmine, Cascade Surplus, nor anywhere else I checked.
Didn't do any house-cleaning either - naughty of me.

On Agenda for Today:
Powell's.
Wire.
Misto.
Isotransformer, dammit!
Groceries. Or else. (Don't forget flour...)
House-cleaning, dammit!

Stuff I need to squeeze in soon:
PDA software.
Investment paperwork.
Temporary fix on back door.
Metro run.
Diodes, dammit.
Variac.
More on the metallurgy chapter.

Fun stuff I did:
Movies.

Fun stuff I want:
Lapidary - There's a brand spanking new still-in-the-box Lortran tumbler sitting five feet to my left. It pleads like a hussie for an end to virginity.

Side commentary:
I've got dandy deerhounds!!
I've got my truck back. I love that old wreck.

Well, that's a lie. There has been *some* playing. :)

Fourty seven hours of paid work this week. Looks like the average for the rest of "Project Saphire" will be nine hours per working day. My boss tells me that we've been awarded 120 additional Albetson's stores (at least sixty working days worth of work) and an undefined number of Safeway stores. The long drought certainly feels like it may be over.

I squeezed in a couple of evening sessions at NIETC - Electrical Project Supervision class (part of the Foreman Certification series). I continue to be impressed with the quality of NIETC.

Cold weekend this... winter's last bluster, I suppose.

Dorothy reports having had a good time at Radcon. I wish very much I could have gone along, but duty lay here. Next year is another matter... I enjoy Radcon almost as much as Orycon. She should be home before midnight tonight.

I treated myself to Powells yesterday. Curling up with a good one most nights this coming week!

I also rented some DVDs. It's been a long time since I've done movies and popcorn. It is something of a luxury to just sit back and be entertained. Reading is wonderful, but it requires active participation on my part. I *am* doing something when I read. Movies are sort of like an intellectual and emotional massage. Small wonder that so many folk are addictied to TV. (I'm really glad that ours has been offline for the past couple of years. A fine life choice we made there!) A good movie every now and then is like a good desert every now and then!