My Dearest Howard,

I fantasize about the day when we can finally meet in person and I can suck the stocks and bonds from your mutual investment plan. Any human woman would be hard pressed to find a man like Howard. He puts the pants in Financial Planner. One more thing for all you lonely ladies out there; financial advise really is the way to a human woman's heart. *sigh* I highly suggest you find one today!

Howard, I love the way you shake your ganseleberwurst! It makes me want to spill my milzwurst all over your aalgeleewurst and lick the rauhwurst from your geflugelwurst. Ich wurde vorschlagen, sie kommen vorbeiund legen sich eine weile auf mein couch!!! NOW BITCH!!