LIfe moves forward each day. Last weekend, since Ed had company, I had the oppotunity to go spend time with my friends. I had a awesome weekend, went out, went to movies, basically just had a great time.

Each day I keep working towards to goal that I started working towards that day three years ago.

I mean would he actually think I would stay here. I mean hell, we have not played in three years or had sex together. Why would I stay. I mean for the most part I am freakin miserable,

On a good day, I can say to myself, just a little more time I need to get my shit together and find a place and other days I am like, shit, just move into a shelter and start living your life again.

I mean when it comes to me, no matter what I do, I will not be good enough for him, lol, I no longer try, and I find myself not liking the way I am because of this. He is not good enough for me, I deserve better.

Each day I take a step forward or stay at the same place, I have not falling backwards, nor do I forget the things I hear and see.

Well enough of my shit.
love
me