Porn and Fling.com

I just posted six nude pictures of myself on a porno dating site called Fling. I did this after becoming submersed in porn as a result of a psychology book I found out about at the New York Times. I learned from the book, "Why We Love," that men raise their immune systems--visually by looking at porn. Porn raises a man's testosterone, which in turn makes a man's hair, teeth, skin and so on, healthier.
To spice things up, I joined a dating service boasting 50 thousand users world wide, called FLING. I got like 6 offers from horny girls around the Bay Area to meet up and have sex. They were all bullshit.
One of the girls actually lead me to a web cam where she had sex with herself and it was pretty amazing. The other, like half dozen, were men from porn sites who had posted borrowed photos of chicks and then added to them, bullshit biographies. The porn sites emailed me with bullshit love letters that said the falsified girls' phone numbers were on links provided in the email. The links all went to random porn sites where the chicks couldn't be found anywhere.
I got two love letters, one standardized pasted message inviting me over for sex, and three invites for cyber sex. I got three more blog style invites to come over the girl's houses and have sex, two of which were from girls living in totally different parts of the Bay and the blogs were identical.
These Love Letters below are total bullshit.
---Hey there! I hope you are having a good day so far...mine is going pretty good, but it is still early. Maybe WE can make it a little better later on today though :) I am really glad you got back to me, if everything goes as I think it will, I really think we will hit it off well:) I don't mean to sound to forward but I have to tell you I really miss having great sex and I think you are just what I need right now. Not that this is the first time in my life I have gone so long without it, but this time feels so much worse for some reason and you just feel so right!! I am so looking forward to some naughty fun with you that's for sure...I am getting excited now just thinking about you! If you can make some time for me tonight that would be awesome, I'm definitely ready for you to break my little dry spell... Anyway, I gotta run but I wanted to get back to you real quick while I had a minute. I wanted to let you know you can call my cell whenever you want so we can set something up. I posted my number for you (and a bunch more pics!) at my favorite personal site it's at www.onlinegirlshome.com/ashley00 My username in the site is ashley00. I use this site mainly cause a couple of my friends use it and it's discreet and safe. It's definitely much better than most sites I have tried. If for some reason you already have plans for tonight lets definitely try and get together tomorrow or even Monday.
Call me,
Ashley
---Hey! Thanks for writing me back here, its great to hear from you! how are ya? great I hope! me, I am doing good.. just getting ready to go to my Yoga class. I am really looking forward to it, I took a couple months off because I hurt my knee while hiking during a family vacation. Anyways its really nice to get back to it! As you can see I love to be active and keep my body in shape. I am not like a fitness nut or anything just like to look/feel sexy! so what made you join Fling? have you had much luck? I just joined myself and I am not sure it is what I am looking for. I have a pretty busy life and kinda just want a regular basic fling to satisfy my (and your/his) sexual needs. I am not sure if the guys on this site are down to meet up and rock this boat though. So far the guys that have messaged me just wanted to cyber, which is ok.. I like that sometimes but I am looking for the real thing ultimately. Which is why I messaged you back.. seems like you are looking for that too. so -CL-tell me more about what your looking for, what your into, your turn ons/offs etc and lets see if we click. As for me, I am into just about anything having to do with oral and really like to get fucked hard. Hope that isnt too forward :P just wanna keep it honest :) jeez its getting late, I should head out to my class, I will be on later this evening so if this all sounds good to you maybe we could chat some on IM? Do you have Yahoo? mine is my email name. Oh and I also have this place that has pics and stuff on it, the link is www.50mbstorage.com/aliceshomepage hope you like what you see and I hear back from you again (and that your not just some spammer trying to get me to join some other stupid site, I hate that!)
xxo Alice

Brazilian Playboy, Whaletime.net '03

A Brazilian Playboy is something I seriously can't have in my possession for very long.

The first time you look at a Brazilian Playboy is very nice and is in public. You open the magazine, and it flips open to the centerfold page and you realize what a complete gem you've uncovered, and the day brightens like butterfly wings caught in the sunlight. You flip through the pages and take a good, interested, long look at each picture and feel proud of your fanship in the playboy bunny.

The second time is a little more complex and must be the final time the Brazilian Playboy is looked at. It usually happens when you're in a situation that is very private. For instance, you wake up at five or six in the morning and you realize that you're just going to lay there awake with your eyes closed so you might as well take advantage of the beautiful dawn light peaking through the window.

You open the Brazilian Playboy and take a slow, passionate, fumbling glance at each page, letting your mind wander on a seemingly endless journey from picture to picture. Once you've imagined the reality of every body part of the Playboy bunny being a real guest in your home, you then continue to the next set of pictures, to other girls.

Then you view the other girls in reverse order and then the first Playboy bunny. And then the first Playboy bunny in forward motion and then the other girls for a third time. At this point, the Brazilian Playboy must be thrown out. If the Brazilian Playboy is not thrown out at this interval, the third viewing may meet with disaster and, dare I say, damnation.

Because as the second viewing has risen in intensity from the first, so shall the third from the second. If the Brazilian Playboy is viewed for a third time, there may become the involvement of the olive oil from the kitchen as well as hiding your bed sheets in the bottom drawer behind your pants. At this point, the keeping of a Brazilian Playboy could enter an area of medical risk.

Upon the fourth viewing of a Brazilian Playboy, you may call in sick for work, head out into town, and buy some silk sheets, rent a music stand, get some antiseptic cream, and include a quick detour to the lesbian sex shop for assorted ointments.

This, of course, is when you're online with a bunch of women who are all doing the same thing you're planning on doing. It's like being online at the 7-11 with a bunch of beer and a bunch of women who also are buying a bunch of beer. And the only natural thing is to ask them all to come back to your house and join you. But what you don't realize is that the lady at the cash register got the job there because she hates men and wants to spend her day around other people who hate men.

And there you are, a man, who is masturbating, thinking that it's OK to hit on her and all the other chicks in the store because they all know that he's masturbating. And he knows that they're all masturbating, only reaffirming the cashier's hatred for men.

After returning home, the end of the day will consist of painstakingly accurate precision-shaving, antiseptic creams, and bandages, which is really why the Brazilian Playboy should be avoided in the first place.

SF-URBAN-MOTO Sept. 07 pg. 30

In 2000 I voted for the Green Party instead of Al Gore. Bush won and our world was sent into a pit of endless drama. Per advice from a relative, I left SF and lived in Brazil for 10 months. Brazil is Socialist-- School is only for four hours, work is usually a short ride from home and people never change jobs. Beach Culture in Brazil is an organized Brotherhood and people take in surf-tourists with no questions.
SF has the best cold weather surf in the world, but the sport involves a lot of sit, wait and fear of being bitten by dinosaur-like sharks. After Brazil, I lived in Colombia and was threatened with knives and guns and had become phobic. I took a ten hour train ride to San Diego, traveled down into Baja and after being in the water for ten minutes I became completely afraid of sharks and went home.
Skate boarding had always delivered more adrenalin than surf because there’s no wait and plenty of time is spent charging and sliding rather than sitting and shivering. All of these aspects combined, the idea of a Norcal Brotherhood like he one in Brazil, the fear of water, the need for a constant rush and the drug tests I have to take for work in corporate security caused me to look towards motorcycles. (In Colombia, soldiers and security are an organized Brotherhood, hence the profession.)
Also the desire to make money on the side and not being able to buy an apartment to fix up and sell, made bikes a good choice. Electric bikes, my first interest, weigh 200 pounds and cost $2,700 dollars so they fell out of the running. Also, the design of electric bikes was one of the reasons I felt people were shying away from fuel efficiency even with the world running red with war.
So I sat down and started to draw stick figures of bikes until I found a design that I thought anybody would buy–something undeniable. Then after drawing bikes for a month, I found that Beach Cruiser Bicycle companies already make a bike similar to what I had drawn. Then when I bought a used Tim Roth Rat Fink, I was disappointed with the design. I almost felt as though the box-like shape of the cruisers were to scare people. The raised handle bars cause the rider’s back to raise up at 90 degrees and then the arms come out at 90 degrees so that rider forms a square shape. From behind, the design directs the onlooker to look at the dude’s butt. This can cause a guy to think about how the dude may have been in prison and what must have happened to the dude’s butt while he was locked up. Then the person get’s scared and looks away.
So with some help from the 14th and 15th Streets in the Mission, some brothers and I stripped off the motorcycle style, chrome forks and put on extended three and a half foot chopper forks with a twenty inch wheel. This raised the front end and gave the bike the pyramid shape that it desperately needed. The fork was made by Mike at Lo-Fi Customs.
Then after this initial impulse buy of the bike, I went onto the net and found a myriad of web sites, in particular, the links page at Rockx that show how popular the sport of beach cruiser bikes are in Europe. With new hope from Europe, I went and got myself ripped off by buying an engine kit from a store in Oklahoma. –Never buy the kit.
Then it was time to learn. With too much money into the hands of ancient Hells Angel affiliate Lauren from the Grant and Vallejo corner at Café Trieste, I learned the term, “Case Hardened Steal Saw.” 500 bucks after that, a returned kit, multiple separate engine mounts and ten different arc welds, many of which were removed and redone, I’m ready to explain to anybody how to make a motor-bike.
Honda makes three engines that are perfect for bikes. The GXH25, GXH35 and the GXH50. The 25 and 35 are great with pedal assist and the 50 doesn’t need an assist. The torque necessary to push a bike is too great for any of the three engines. Thus, on the engine you want to slip on a transmission. There are gear box transmissions made for motorized bicycles that can be bought on the web, but they cost more and aren’t really nice, especially when they’re new and squeak all the time. Also, many are designed to be mounted above the rear wheel and run backwards. Or you can use a Pocket Bike CVT Transmission or a Go-Cart Torque-a-Meter transmission. When you get the transmission, you want to make sure the cup is the right size to fit over the clutch. This can be read by how many cc’s the transmission is built for.
Then you want to make sure that it has a one inch bore on the shaft which you’ll mount your sprocket onto because you want to use a really big, eight toothed sprocket for a #41 chain. Most transmissions come with a really small sprocket made for a #25 chain. This is bad because you have to mount the engine down with factory-robot strength for the chain to be pulled tight enough not to come off.
Then in the back, under the right conditions, your wheel will climb to whatever speed your engine shaft will turn at. Even if you run a chain to a sprocket with no transmission, you’ll eventually climb to 49cc’s of speed, if the bike is on a slightly downhill slope. So the larger your sprocket is in the back, the better. Your take off will be slow, but if the sprocket is large enough you wont have to push off with your feet and you’ll be able to go uphill. Right now, I’m getting help with an arc weld and mount of a 73 toothed sprocket for a #41 chain onto a mountain bike freewheel. I’m going to run that to a ten toothed sprocket on a 2 to 1, 24 tooth Gear ratio inside a gear box transmission. Engine shafts usually run in reverse, so a 2 to 1 gear box, one small gear and then one large gear will run forward. The CVT and Torque-a-Meter transmissions have 2 gears, but they don’t touch and are connected by belts. A 3 to 1 gear box is the one that will run backwards, but the torque is spread out better.
Fuel emission and efficiency is controlled by the mount of the engine. The engine must be mounted solidly, preferably on all sides and bottom. The engine should be mounted to a quarter inch plate and then the plate should be mounted to the bike. The chain must also be tight to reduce the shaking of the engine. Idling the engine for too long will give cause for failure. If the engine starts to take in the wrong amount of air, the engine will begin to shake. The more it shakes, the worse the air ratio becomes and the more violent it will shake until black smoke comes out.
The chain must be pulled very tight to reduce the shaking. Pocket Bikes with the #25 chain are great because the a Chinese robot pulls the rear sprocket into place and makes the chain tight enough to cut off a kids fingers. A #41 chain pulled this tight with the Honda GXH engine should run quiet and clean.
Lastly and the most obvious problem is the throttle. Honda throttles don’t work and have to be altered. A spring needs to be added, mounted on the transmission to pull the throttle into an idle position. Also the mount for the throttle cable is terrible. The throttle hose must remain stationary for the cable inside to have the leverage necessary to pull the throttle lever. Right now, I’m using a wing nut, which I turn by hand to clamp down the throttle hose.
This can also be used to pull the chain tight. The engine can be tilted back towards the rear wheel and the chain can be applied to both sprockets. Then bolts can be pushed up through the frame of the bike and through the plate mounted to the engine. Then wing nuts can be used to push the plate down onto the frame and pull the chain as tight as possible, away from the rear wheel.
Honda GXH engines also have the problem of aesthetics. If you’re not a middle aged hippie trying to save the Earth by riding a fuel efficient bike, you’ll have no reason for trying to convince anybody that the GXH engines look cool. At least the 49cc doesn’t look cool. If you strip the engine covering to gain the cool chopper style engine inside, be wherry of the fan next to the pull start. If you reach down to adjust the throttle while the engine is running, the fan will hit your finger as hard as a twenty-two pistol. The first day out, I reached down and saw a rainbow of blood spray off of the fan and had no idea how many fingers had been cut until I got to a sink.