writings

whoopsy daisy chain links fenced

randy — Fri, 09 May 2008 05:13:31 GMT

I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired love and hate, I love and hate locked gates pock faces bright ways towards days unblemished by despair we’re nowhere here near helpless near hopeful lack and waste my honor at the door scraping fingernails bloody raw on concrete passion oh fashion! me some new pants spiderwebs and comfrey leaves rose thorns and nettles and petals petals pedaling into the moonrise where I may stand enshrined in my mind’s eye at least for a day this day our daily weight in worry but if we hurry… scurrying ants on the window sill the stillness of my lover’s sleeping breath hurling requests at the gods like hailstones buckets of dreams cougars and wolves and butterfly wings like silk like flaming naphtha in spirals around ourselves we dance to be alive and yearning turning how many revolutions around which of my suns? heeding which revelations? I need rest? I need the rest of my soul to discern a distinction between love and hate I’m gonna get you sucka!! like bombs over bags of groceries cogs in a gear transmission: Drive Forwards thru fields of dreams fields of crosses yoga at Flanders I’m 29 years old and don’t know who I am I can’t find myself on the tv screen or in the magazine racks and my intentions no wise reside in such ammunition anyways, experts say child plays at dawn on the seashore don’t eat the fish or weeds we need supplements we need implements to display our creativity I make much more that dollars and babies but it gets hazy under my hood they’re cutting down the woods I am not a carpenter I am not a man I am not a consumer I just am with no plan tryna stay afloat in a river of filthy magic where beauty is tragic

some mo old shite

randy — Thu, 10 May 2007 14:37:55 GMT

attack of the butterfly fang hornet heart nest sheep paint the town pink but still sleep for primetime tv blink mink coats and wing ding floats two hundred dollar hoodies and packed bowls certified organic oat feed bags we still tie shit around our throats neckties and nooses golden shackles my boy wears a padlock who’s free? red light green light freeze put your motherfuckin hands in the air smile pretend you don’t care we’re all hella stubborn and judge sour cream fudge baseball curmudgeonly break beats and budge for eggplants and such dishes crack wishes like whips and shards of glass slicing lengthwise but creep through city streets and crooked paths through leaning trees i’ll sieze moments and set them free for evolving dreams to foster roots in stormy seas but let’s pretend to be placid so our neighbors can pretend ease but i dont wanna sign a fucking lease this beast rages for a feast of laughter but is tensed for disaster and can’t keep the past tense from becoming ever after until he tells these mother others to shove it but how to do that and still be nice still show love and and actually melt some ice instead of planting forests that grow stunted and tortured more bricks more trips fuck power i want a kiss and the judges miss the fucking point when they insist on their dead morals and can’t admit that they too commit actions that create factions and fraction family and who do i love and how am i able and what will i wait for and what what to make haste towards and which way is forwards what up i got my cup and it’s empty to the brim and i swim in my desire to give sips to my people who rip holes in my heart and i’m not always good at sewin them up or showin my love or just standin up for my right to spiritual health but fuck all that cuz i don’t even know i’m just selfish and she’s just some ho

butterfly fangs

randy — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 19:22:24 GMT

fuck gray clouds, we got daggers we got butterflies, we got pollen we got bloody fucking thorns we got halos we got horns we got fairy wings and fangs we got love got scorn got hopes and fears and dreams we're torn we're tattered fragments of divinity we're scattered memories of eden wandering lost and tryna get back to the garden, tryna find ourselves in this hazy sharp maze of mirrors tryna care, tryna share tryna get somewhere just a little bit closer to who we are in our most hopeful dreams blind and groping for something solid that isn't a cage we've got rage we've got bloody beating hearts broken and joining together wandering found with like one fucking toe holding us to the ground buried in mounds of bullshit and frayed feathers cut the tether to build a wall? fuck y'all i love y'all and your burning bridges and leaning towers and stick figure perceptions of other we got heart we got soul we got memories that overwhelm we got emotions that challenge our control we whisper and choke and then write in bold screaming silently that we exist that we're real, multidimensional with color and depth we got tears we got breath cycling in and out between every one of us connecting each and every one of us fuck gray clouds we've got the sun in our eyes and deep seas we've got wounds still bleeding we've got disease we've got kisses we got missing the point and severing connections we've got misdirection we've got discovery we've got drudgery we got muddy lessons and i'm gritty but it feels shitty to hurt someone i love but i ain't got pity and i ain't got hate i got extra plates and a place set at the table and i'll wait but i ain't gettin on my knees i demand divine deliverance from the goddess in me i demand all eyes open and willing to see i demand fear float on by and leave me free i demand that we all be who we really fucking are shining stars burning with yearning to light up the world's turning learning to love ourselves and others well we've got deep wells and deserts parched lips and floods we've got mad love and terrific tears bone blood and spirit are you feeling this???? my soul floats on the brink of joy and despair on the border of birth and death in the shoreless sea of endless possibility that we all bring into being together called life and i'm alive and i strive and i hide behind my shadows and the moon rises reflections of my soul growing towards full

sunflower scepter

randy — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 19:21:12 GMT

i do not wield a sunflower scepter. but how pleasant could be that deception i'll sow hazy luminescence smoky inky radiance mazes of mirrors mask missions' mantra color the sky with 52 shades of gray and play in the shadows the clouds shine reflective still pond puddles of dreamy remembrances of futures tangled vines wrapping my ankles thorn blades fruit wine i sing in the shimmering wind make time ripples mutant sea monsters dolphins and dime bag tortoise shells i be well sense hell spell heaven play drums in sevens where me brethren? you reckon sunflower swords could catalyze true transformation? i suppose i'm just beckoned by thorns, caressed by scorn bloody love and inspiration how i yearn for temptation for storms i am an angel with horns i am dusk and i am dawn i am swirling light and shadows in the silence of the howling moon the dust and the broom this is not torment this is soul scent roses and compost and peppermint heaven sent hell bent on awakening on being on expressing on inventing seeing and screaming loving and dreaming try to create meaning from muddy gleaming of crystal waters streaming through this vessel of earth's breathing revolutions around our sons our daughters our lovers leaving this seemingly stagnant pool of depth unfathomable this soul weeping moonbeams and hailstones my love is not a candle in the wind flickering but behaves in ways some deem sin my love is not a sunflower in the vase withering my love builds futures out of nebulous imaginings casts spells of fabulous surrenderings to the rhythms of evolutions oft confusing meanderings with a motion of raging tenderness our muse will rise above the slanderings the panderings to moral codes and odes to hesitance shit......... we intoxicate the stars goddess bless we create them with a kiss and set 'em to shine within our chests to light up the best of every one we meet cause everyone's a piece of me and i'm a piece of god and i don't wield a sunflower scepter or a sword more like an ancient tree acquainted with fire and rain and ice and storm and dropping leaves and being reborn in proper seasons spreading roots towards the force in the core and stretching branches towards the lights of heaven

risin shinin

randy — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 19:20:29 GMT

risin shinin metamorphasizin openin eyes and hands and heart to fill my part with shit worth sharin caring yet daring yearning and learning and burning and birthing and searching and working and..... scrub dishes dirty to bring wishes from out of sterile reference frames into gritty glistening reality gravity are you listening... to the misty rain the shining sun the dancing flames they know our names the glowing moon the standing trees the singing birds the thousand mosquitoes for who we're food floods of information dammed transmissions scrambled i hike thru brambles tearing wearing out my soul i cry and turn around and plant some more i'm standing in a doorway at a crossroads on an unmapped trail to gods know where trying to kill myself so i can live trying to transform so i can forgive myself step forward unsheathe the sword and fall... risin shinin metamorphasizin openin eyes and hands and heart to fill my part with shit worth sharin caring yet daring yearning and learning and burning and birthing and searching and working and turning in spirals within every tear is the seed of a thousand smiles file this over declarations of sacred intentions file this over a soul finding direction file this as letting my fires flow with passion towards the reinvention of the world got wings got songs got longing got dreams bring these things into fruition my only guide is intuition god lives within and the only truth is the way i choose to live bring dawn bring cracking thru my chrysalis bring broken cages bring raging patience bring funk beat medications bring tantric meditations bring one lost soul swirling in the tao together with his constellation to create vibrant nows bring anointed wows blessed wonder bring melodic thunder bring joyful suppers bring openings to seeking lovers rising shining synthesizing mind body and soul authentic/ whole metamorphasizing self into gold philosopher's stone opening gateways to uncharted realms of overwhelming splendor filling days with myriad ways to expand and connect with the mother with ourselves with each other searching out the energies we wish to ingest to feed inject beauty into the decay color the gray with visions vibrant dreamspells timeless finding the shit that rhymes with my soul watch the petals unfold become whole start to glow what wealth is hidden within ourselves dare to delve dare to cast your spell in a mirror creator bountiful desire to become earth wind water sun it's just begun just begin risin shinin metamorphasizin openin eyes and hands and heart to fill my part with shit worth sharin caring daring yearning and learning and burning and birthing and searching and working and turning and serving as a cell in god's evolution this revolution curing soul pollution dancing thru the confusion to bring a profusion of light from out the ether this ain't about solution this about becoming the libation the offering the invocation the force that transmutes the course of the desecration into one of reverence for and synchronization with all of creation live funk beat medication live tantric meditation live life love celebration live god force activation live

gray clouds and butterflies

randy — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 19:19:06 GMT

gray clouds and butterflies memories of revelry spawning mo(u)rnings yawning stiff back copper and crystal mystical dawnings musical knick knacks tree frogs and fruit bats feathery green needles pungent wings flap crack hold this hold that like kisses on the wind that bitch is supafly climbing rungs on the tree of life bells humming ancient tunes of truth of dream that dwell in the spaces we create these roads need no paving no waiting i'm wading thru a river of emerald eyes of fire the midwife i'm shaking cobwebs from my heart set the spiders free longing find the middle path between hedonist and ascetic somewhere between bacchus and buddha between druid and judah planting beanstalks with heartalk to deliver meaning and nourishment to the gods scaling mountains drumbeats may the stones know the ecstasy of a kiss from the song of my lips may our tears drip like nectar and our fears drown in sweet puddles of reflection mirrors and prisms reshaping visions retuning wishes what i send returns kisses on the wind ceremonies of joining reverent honor creation unleash passion shining climbing rungs on the tree of life polish jewels unwinding spools of self weave with others brothers and sisters and mothers and lover sugar and spice and my honey may not be a nice girl but it's love let her in where i can't hide build an altar devotion to evolving divinity we come for soul delivery clear space are you feelin me? fill it up copper and crystal amber and sage drawings and longings kisses at dawn within new patterns reforming old visions restoring faith the shape the galaxies spin sparkling ether if she'll eat, i'll feed her try not to need her and so it begins reckless ripples of angst ripples of stretching towards desire ripples of thanks cast out reel in fishing for destiny displacement contemplation of sin what is love?? what do we bring into the world?? what song does soul sing?? birds and trees snakes and bees spring not ease reclaiming ground creating new sounds stretch i left fights and fear for kisses our lips run deep infuse the starways ingest the moon mountains and magic life can be tragic depends how your chakras are tuned rhythms and runes make room for the muse to express the views from the window growing slow down and step back??? boom boom crack her eyes be glowing the beat be flowing water and patient stone volcanoes erupting whole earth be bumping in time with evolution of souls deep ohm thumping journey in spirals manifest home jewels in the dome of my temple keep your chrome i be polishing spirit the galaxies be singing tones about the evolution of matters hear it there's mirth within this beat down planet given birth wind muttering shells shuttering open to let out our light cast my spells brightly shining from the depths of the cavern to the heights of the sky finding my soul learning to fly

i'm onna shine

randy — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 19:17:34 GMT

iron wrought hides import walls into green space box store parking lot light poles holes in sky holy mind this park is reserved there're diseasements mummified hearts sing beats of petrification ask who'd dare to cross the basilisk i it's aiight, we killed our own rooster he was an asshole there're tolls to pay even on the cloud route trees doing headstands to portray their phosphorescent roots but the glow of the moon is a mute point we shoot fiery glances and give up the loot scoot scram skedaddle this battle addles my mind but can't leave it behind scrambled rambles and hints of divine intervention or maybe this was my intention i mean, my life is my invention but i'm sculpting blind and can't rewind and don't really know if i would even if i could i mean all y'all's shoulds didn't do any good to change what i felt as good as grand as ground worth dancing on standing on head down with my feet in the clouds and my heart beating loud treating now as something more to live for than a doorway to tomorrow and i feel the sorrow but i do not regret reckless beginnings my soul is singing churchbells ringing the ceremony is on psalm etched palms caressing potential portals of new being slapping the gateways of new sound gripping the vessels that illustrate meaning or at least name the sensation or at least try by and by sigh and cry sink and fly i'll float my goat to weave a coat of stankin splendor chawin thistledown in the moonlight of i will remember dismemberment and enchantment betrayal and enhancement life and love and pain and aching pleasure deep breaths and scratched itches stitched hearts and parting ways the parts we play this scene this dream what we mean when we say while we sleep while we fall deeply rising downsizing expanding understanding or over fields of four leaf clover folding our shoulders emptying holsters on roller coaster toasters no sir, not guilty but i'll plead no contest cause though i don't hold your code in contempt it don't tempt my tempest to attempt to dismiss the temptation of temporal fascination that yields activation of self in refreshing situations sit you ate? i on for an eon when this being is catalyzed to be on wavelengths in temperaments that attain something new some new heart some new rhythm some new part to play some start reckless but endearing caring fearing daring to share kisses and hearts harp strings sleepy mutterings of devotion to the idea that a bit of love is worth a deal of pain ideals insane i'm a lunatic tock kill that clock i'm bringing this now with me forever in my pocket to cherish the feeling of this being unlocked healing and reverence desire and severance jealousy's leverage lovers' penance purgatorial head trips embrace guilt embrace growth embrace cozy boats on stormy seas embrace the ones who make you shine and break your knees these loves this divine wine trickling between our thighs the stars the moon the pale sunrise souls overflowing with the joy and pain of life's tides rolling fresh paint in the dusty rooms we use to hide ourselves from the cycles of time i'm onna shine fuck time my watch sees dreams that demand divine deliverance i embrace ecstatic dissonance dance polyrhythmatic insistence in the validity of this mission which through distance and difference brings visions and wishes met ready set lickety spit witches and bitches brew steeply pitched roofs climb and slide and be the sights then die my oh my we really opened up a can of worms this round let's go fishing in the sound for solid ground in soiled gowns as sacred clowns we can pound cake and nail frowns onto crosses boogie down i wear fertile brown i'll cast hope around my tangled crown think roses think noses running from the nooses think whose is this convoluted aroma of desire and fear terrifically terrified grasping to lose yabba dabba do nothing stones age frothing mother moon human mothing croon and swoon this tired tune all our homes have too few rooms but there's plenty of spaces to bloom boom zooming around the edges of my sanity felicity fostered ferocious fermentations of gut rot festering delusions of heartache raise the stakes give me rattlesnake fangs and honey i'll brew for you such an elixir of wonder of such sweet passion and tangy tragedy as to leave you breathful and rainbowed soggy and sticky with tears and cum stains and bloody self inflicted wounds i'll scribe runes into the flesh of my soul rhymes you can't read with the two eyes on your face but by the light of the stars and the moon this starving world of marvels this love that reeks of incest or is it sweet incense i'm incensed that trust and calamity are so well intertwined there's no such thing as innocence take sips of divine breathy kisses like fire and wine i'm onna shine

cedar and sage

randy — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 19:16:45 GMT

cedar and sage scribbled pages broken cages trickless mage wage slave but my loves rage we angels have horns torn wings and unanswered prayers or maybe wait or maybe stop or maybe just thick gashes from rose thorns swollen bee stings saturn enveloped by rings cell phones i'm roaming past home looking for tomorrow joy fear and sorrow lightning eyes split minds we need time? we have nows we moan vowels and constants ohm stretched and broken through the night zen of hiphop and kisses mingling hearts tangling bodies into love's profusion stop mingling bodies tangling hearts into webbed confusion stop butterfly fangs i have no regrets for reckless beginnings i shout defiant dreaming at the stars i scream movement at the mountains my soul fountains hope and fear and love and pain into the river i float i'm soaked in torn pages and pouches in warm embraces in the excrement of lusty comfort tears and laughter the rain the sun the moon in what comes before what came after in what should i'm soaked in the tears i can't shed tangled blankets what ifs i'm soaked in guitar riffs in far and wide in hold my hand in spliffs and vomit seizures in years of numb comfort gambling and scrambling my direction so i don't go where i'm going but yo i am growing i have no regrets for reckless beginnings i shout defiant dreaming at the stars i scream movement at the mountains my soul fountains hope and fear and love and pain into the river i float in halfanswered prayers and unfinished dreams soaring on torn wings sore and tense confusing tenses contradicting senses of storms and knots blurry lenses building fences to tear down stop i don't think i trust the lot of you i don't think i trust myself i have no regrets for reckless beginnings but fear what i've ended am ending i shout defiant dreaming at the stars but maybe i missed some meanings i scream movement at the mountains but i'm stuck my soul fountains hope and fear and love and pain into the river i float soaked in fantasies of sharing in shadows of caring i'm chasing my tale in a spiral to see but some of me is buried and it's raining and i'm stained and i'm straining against the grain and i'm healing and i'm maimed and i'm opening my doors and building my defenses considering lessons considering weapons moths and flames scribbled pages cedar and sage

touch these kisses

randy — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 19:15:32 GMT

other front porches other sources of warmth touch these kisses bipolar? reigning in and crying out fluttering belly and stuttering lips these dripping pens and hands full of potential embedded in so many beats and breaks looks of blank slate expressions looks of desire of scorn of compassion our ability to read increases when we encounter new words our ability to be increases when we encounter new worlds caress new meaning out of satin skin and fits of depression emotional administration bodies pressed in yearning contentment jealous indictment making excuses to place blame is all the rage this season bringing faulty reason center stage love and fate and shifts of faith pain masked as hate life told to wait on heightened state on the edges of sleep dreaming weeping gazing into gleaming eyes moonglow and tears hopes and fears misery and mystery love and rage it's all god it ain't all good and if i'm gonna live in a cage at least i'll design how it's made smuggling desire out the fucking door i ain't sick i've got curious habits and if i lick you right there...... oh shit what's for lunch? kale cookies and genital lumps i'm grumpy, dress frumpy but in some eyes some times i shine god's fingerprints caress the divine refined sea water dip your clamshell ladle and let it leak slowly out your pores and if you can help me open doorways out of my mind.... i would drink time like a fine wine lick my lips manic? no panic, i'm piercing my clouds i ain’t sick, i've got curious habits hit me pronounce my name with scorn but i was warm this morn when i awoke and didn't need to don a cloak to hide myself so, if you're gonna paint my canvas... i really like the gritty oranges and salty pinks and rich heavy greens and deep blues and while the raging reds no doubt have their place they don't leave a taste that inspires devotion all is love and commotion growth and corrosion musings and notions of poison and potions patience and haste kiss me no wait i don't want to waste ahhh...... but the taste of the sauce that we baste ourselves in sensations of flavor to savor let it simmer but it's ready dip your spoon i'm hungry no, not chips the moon

i contact

randy — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 19:14:10 GMT

cedar trees juggling i contact contractual definitions tobacco playground stairways this path threw a would should could what if headlice mice nettle stings flights of fancy chancy glances ranting chanting angels in my soul singing redemption songs freedom songs revolution sounds like a whisper in the moonlight in the moonlight sunshine and birdsongs i'll get up and fly away one bright morning landings lemmings baby possums let's dig homes with spoons for the little people the little people hugs without demands this sinner do not be damned in a cave in a bad way runny nose itchy toes exhalations of poetry and drumbeats self concocted crises invent new possibilities tranquility confusion hope fear i trust trust i trust the force that moves my feet and beats my heart i'll be whole for my part glad i could help life happening bells and bells going going gong round comet round cupid round kali golly gee batman, i think you've made a folly fuck that let's dance reverence eros and eris and bacchus and artemis all of our archetypes bleeding my pen zen and the art of compassionate selfishness shellfish and candlesticks sleeping bags of groceries shopping us stopping me doorstops red hexagons red dry rotted siding carpenter ants little hands holding pencils and coloring in the world little hands holding pencils and coloring the world our minds our lives bring that beat back fuck nah invent another it's mother's day creaky steps countless questions i seek rest and adventure brush your teeth

1+1=3

randy — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 19:13:10 GMT

for far too long fire tongs drop glowing coals afraid to be burned by right and wrong what was learned? how much earned? how far turned from my nature? have i matured or just endured? procured any inheritance lately? ya know, like waves from the moon and stars washing the shore and smoothing rough edges or sinking in sandbars and spitting at the sky i need air what should i wear? so much to hold dear and try to come near to.... we share the air what should we wear? somewhere between the tree and forest somewhere between native and tourist somewhere between the river and the sea between the flower and the bee between i and we there ain't no fucking manual teaching how to be free but i'm finding mine somewhere between the earth and sky life has no money back guarantee so if you can see the light behind my eyes and feel the energies radiating from my heart and my mind fuck you, don't take it, it's mine but i'll meet you somewhere between here and there add one plus one you get three and it shines we can hold hands play in a band buy some land we can build eat till we're filled sit still we can climb mountains bathe in fountains cripple each other with doubtin we can stay up all night hold each other tight we can fight we can be silent get violent overthrow tyrants we can smile rest awhile walk five hundred miles we can act like fools break rules invent a school we can get high tell lies say goodbye we can drink wine write rhymes share time we can be on guard try too hard get credit cards we can laugh sail a raft learn a craft we can smoke tell jokes gather our folks we can pitch tents pay rent forget common sense we can kiss we can diss we can hit it we can miss somewhere between me and what's mine somewhere between space and time somewhere between spirals and lines between miracles and crimes between laugh and cry there ain't no fucking manual teaching how to be free but i'm finding mine somewhere between the stone and the sea life has no money back guarantee so if you can see the light behind my eyes and feel the energies radiating from my heart and my mind fuck you, don't take it, it's mine but i'll meet you somewhere between here and there add one plus one you get three and it shines

counting breath

randy — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 19:11:52 GMT

counting breath until release until death until candles and incense until moving back west may we walk the red road together help us to live in harmony bean tea and nicotine breath movement is fluid and jerky trees in the dawn outline the shape of light my shadow is inside tides and tantrums mantras and flights of fancy i pitched a tent and grew roots i want kale and cookies beaaatch i want a watch with twelve hands all sifting the sand for jewels i burn in the cool of awakening mourning i'm storming the castle with a pouch of tobacco a pen and some beads of amber i stand wondering what to do with my lighter and laughter these pages burn with the fire of flaming swords and still moonlit pools fern fronds and treebeards these people are not tools i can use just to meet my needs will you walk with me? we can watch the stars behind each other's eyelids i don't know who you are and where we go is far hold my hand? we are so old stardust and saltwater i would skip the rapid and hop on a rock wander the forest and grow out my locks it's the boom boom crack of beating drums and bloody hearts that move me and groove me and glue me unstuck it's the idle time in tide pools that raises the stock of the raging current we have dreams and value time doesn't keep us rage and lust patience and trust angels and demons hormones taboos and moral codes sons and daughters the moon i didn't sign a prenup with life and the bitch won't give me what i want learn to take it without forsaking reverence the tides don't try bound up in release? teasing the truth eases the proof aloof? nah sprung next rung rings deliverance above the battlements partaking of sacraments where did the love go she asked it glows right behind your crying eyes open up steep staircase on the shore glistening mountains and the sighing sea i'm stumbling under the weight of beams to hold up the path and keep it from being swallowed by the changing tide i ain't gonna fucking crumble i'm climbing up next rung rings deliverance above the battlements partaking of sacraments singing testaments to the rising tide of fulfilling lives

sand dunes

randy — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 19:10:34 GMT

sand dunes in my mind grainy sifting digging rough and grating tearing scraping in order to make smooth not smother not stutter accept polish join others do i look nice? i'm trembling like ready to break or maybe just settle into a different shape so rusty so new so dusty and true confidently confused sand in my eyes irritating removing rough spots in my vision abrasively cleansing if my soul would sing who would dare to bring tearing tears to the ceremony deepen my stomach quivers what my fingers feel when my hands are empty fantastic moonlight majestic drizzle awaken the dribble that drools from this pen as i scribble attempts to find the middle of my being so i may branch out and start seeing solutions to some of these riddles that sizzle my synapses and stunt the syntax my being speaks valleys and peaks i want rolling hills less extreme but i also wonder where are the limits to the infinite of course i'm a fucking hypocrite reality contradicts i seek peace not stagnation just my full piece of the fragmented god not this leaky shallow chalice that quenches no thirst i'm ready to burst but scared to be heard scared to or be hurt scared to merge when all that i yearn for is union scared to lose self while seeking with other i don't wanna play games to stain the bedsheets i wanna share the sweet and salty i wanna be faulty and grind plates like earth quaking the birth of new vision new methods of being i want my fruit to be eaten and nourish new ways and means i don't want to be so fucking confused i want my days and nights to groove in the rhythm of earth and sky deep and high whether we or i shouldn't fucking matter float on by the world is weightless in relation to our fears i can carry mine crossing double standards and dry creek beds i can carry mine through mazes of demons and angels with severed heads and spiders who weave toxic delusional webs but i can't figure out standards for what clamors in my head like hammers and chainsaws when hummingbird petals are what i am fed but i am overly aware of every move and glance and fear what is read of my face and stance and i care what y'all think of my words and my dance and i can't find no peace inside of my pants but i don't think pants are really my issue it just rhymed so i used it these lines all seem useless like working up to a frenzy just to confuse us oh, hell sex sells ring bells bring out your dead i'm moving ahead of myself into a realm where i can be well and stepping right thru the landmines i left to sabotage myself

holy mama!!!

randy — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 19:03:13 GMT

penvelope me swiftly tilting planetary consciousness tilting verily forward the source of heartbeats and cedar trees and baby feet and suv's to awaken my inner yearnings onto technicolor tapestry called life my soil is moist rich humus fertile sparkled with sharp gravel volcanic daggers to sharpen my desires and burn my passion who amongst us would sing psalms to a handless god and praise him for the act of abandoning his creation but oy! what fertile seeds! what deft planting a voluptuous mother with her tall trees and expansive oceans the tears she sheds in quiet melancholy contemplation or raging howling tempests KADOSH!!KADOSH!!KADOSH!! my father ejaculates idea into her molten womb lava flows like birth blood we are born of fire stone and sea we are born of light and breath and dream we are the sky sprouting from the ground we are earth embraced fy fiery heavens we are the percussive breath of forever's improvisational orchestra ..... and we sing black sooty smoke and car alarms the brazen shrill of industry of our creative impulse run amok and callous who amongst us would sing psalms to the destroyer the producer of deathly elixirs the marrer of beauty who would sing praises of the enchantment of war to the patron saint of boys with bodies blown apart i see the majestic snowcapped thighs of my mother i eat the sweet fruits of her forested rolling flesh i wonder how we could have become so sick that we've instituted a thousand forms of matricide and deny even that she exists

awakened dreams

randy — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 19:02:27 GMT

like sunsparkle lakelight enchanting evergreen hills with waves of unpolished sapphire we'll build spires on the midday moon with spoons with mud and sponges it takes so long to drink eternity thru a straw have you washed your dirty dishes? mountain grounds frozen clouds meandering to the sea frigid green rivers like molten emerald frothing rabid carving the granite heights ring of fire erupting vision and stone new soil in the valley we toil for bites for breathable air and shelter we live fables and fairytales so mundane the moments when we touch the divine like lightning split firewood a sip of sky tears hugging strangers manifestations of goddess finding the starry vault of heavens in each other's eyes there are towers in my mind breathing stone that glows smoldering life force soul artesian wells cracking parking lots like orgasm like jackhammers of spirit stuff like the birth of galaxies colonies of ants how many fibers in a pair of pants? how many cells of plant stuff? how many mutations of dna? how many eons of starshine? IT'S ALL GOD work rest and play polishing the discovery of jewels mining the depths of soul the pinnacles of spirit manifestation of my being an awakened dream

home

randy — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 19:01:45 GMT

there are stars in my eyes but i can't see the sky for the halogen lamps block out the night with their glare so i stare inside at what matter hides behind its rind of swirling colonies of atoms was our father at least for a time but i always thought mater meant mother but what shines and what is my mantra? it hums it pulses it ripples beating heart fish eggs copper bowls of cedar smoke so many crippled souls lost scrolls while reality unfolds its petals, lowers it's face mask and reminds us of our eyes eye could tell a thousand lies and not blink twice but there is a price what's the interest rate, prime time?? where's your dice?? there's been a heist jewels were stolen that's not nice who was christ really and why myrrh?? olive blessed tree of peace the bulldozers the barricades the twelve foot walls of cold concrete burning chariots and cross-eyed killers but this is just filler have you seen what was stolen? felt it? in the raging quiet in between atoms and daydreams and fantasies of infected riches with interest the rates the hate the plush offices the rotting bloated bloody carcasses leaking mater out of ten times too many orifices the crack whores and working poor wage slaves and wasters life leaking out oily pores in dissatisfied subservience to hollowed bosses who grow fat and empty on manipulation mechanization of the mass the whitewash of culture religion prays with mortar shells and land mines the confiscation of individuality sacred fear profit motive propagation of death we become slaves by perceived necessity they stole the food source drilled it for oil planted chemical factories and coal burners and strip malls gave the people white sugar and whiskey slot machines but i hear rhythm in raindrops grandfather's grandfather singing songs of redemption in breezy damp forests not my blood not my home but i'm here and the ancients give voice to the future the ancients give voice to the future the starry sky revolves the revelation revolution is no resolution it's just what planets and galaxies do what solution are you circling? what dream or vision or nightmare are you bringing through the space between atoms to matter? to what gods do we pay homage and create homes for? what demons? what love? what trials and tribulations and triumphs? eternity leaves me bullshit but may it lead us home

furious

randy — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 18:57:04 GMT

i’m fucking furious at the spurious maneuverings of concrete peddlers and profit junkies convolutions of ancient sacred sendings molded into systems for stifling human spirit into terminal cubicle flunkey patriots and prescription pushers ushering in age of debilitating psychoses numbing our abilities to create we excrete whatever we’ve been fed and call it knowledge, progress, i call it shit and i sit and i eat it mamma’s lactating tit replaced by a tin can formula for retroevolution a box with a tube or plasma showing five hundred versions of the same tunnelvision our news delivered with third grade diction so we don’t have to use our brains we’re being broken and tamed crippled and lamed so we can all feel the same about being pawns in a game i think i’m going sane cracked sidewalk to adorn crayola green lipstick lawns dwelling units soaked in formaldehyde like corpses blinding halogen lamps and epileptic fluorescents to block out the moon and stars replace the forest with utility poles and billboards high voltage wires mask the invisible electrical connections between beings red maple red maple where is the staple that binds us unstable in the midst of this fable of table manners and cable channels and sweetmeats and capers the masked one mocks his internal twin broken crockery litters the mindscape control? escape? wait? in the darkening waters of styx waves a candlestick a cedar staff a rosewood spoon noon overcasts the transmission gone transient and missing the point we hit joints we stacked coins caressed loins parted to the joining so free in our cages such slaves under open skies at dawn sweating wages

pinwheel galaxy

randy — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 18:55:23 GMT

pinwheel galaxy still well went agnostic prophet ethereal taxes slumbering masses the government’s fascist folk battle for victuals get drunk on skittles and skitter back to their cribs to jitter bewildered fenced in focus can’t concentrate no ether to mold with in the enclosure the psycho the tropics the delicacy of melting snow under tall trees the clean green intoxicating strength of cedar the taxi meter the crystal goblet holds a silver rose golden dewdrops like kissing poetry flows misty lining lingers in the princess’ eyes pattering intricacies of beauty’s dance like rain on the still pond of the sand shimmers but where is my wand verdant fern fronds tickle the wind fairy song to bring dawn when the storm grows boring we’re exploring the exterior internally the furthest reaches latchless doors in downpours of metaphorical libation puddling at each way station to expound an incantation several layers of language expand to understanding like seeds of trees under melting snow grow the princess beckons glittering glamour but where is her hand amidst the clamor of clanking clam shells that hold love immobile which princess which table multiplication of interest but the rates the rates taxation on fixation the crush crushes the image plush and sharp blood subtle sublime twine knotting intention condensing sensation to point of matter which is the foundation of a question market no answers for sale i know the trail travels tales’ unraveling to reveal their splendour but we left our tails in the trees to better build jails we shorten our sails and sharpen our cares wind blow me where my wings may be healed and love be unsealed to grant truth to feelings is to be as if free there is only one sea no sure what did you see in moment of clarity lucid wave crash cascading over eyes to cleanse mind of thought and leave perception swirling calmly in wakefullness of whirlpool flood gulls squawk melodic transcendence of ugly eleven tones of elven mutterings weave seven heaven tapestry fabrics thread webs to glisten in the teardrops of a jealous queen unable to comprehend her own beauty or the appeal of the princess and unclamp the clam aaaaahhhh love is priceless trial of soul and patience symbiotic parasite darkest depths of stellar heights weakest might brightest night

drumbeats and mapleleaves

randy — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 18:52:57 GMT

like drumbeats like earthquakes like fluttering maple leaves like broken dreams litter the forest floor like over stretched limbs grasping at stars for an instant for an eon eternity’s clockwork spirals like a staircase to elsewhere like bottomless jars of peaches like half a heart dripping oozing floating in boiling blood of fruit like nectar as lava flow caressing so gentle a scalding scouring away of cold granite heights like fighting so we know we exist in your eyes in our eyes for an instant for an eon i feel drumbeats like waterfalls like ancient trees crashing down so forest may grow like evolution unfurling like hummingbirds sipping nectar from the outcome of dinosaur bones like stars exploding and dusting galaxies with a speck of brighter light for an instant for an eon what is my heart amidst the grandeur of eternity’s spiraling evolution how much light if i go nova before i learn to shine and warm a world like desert winds like gritty tongues trying to speak the truth they grasped amongst the swirling stars for an eon before they crashed and broken took up human form for an instant like swarms of insects eating my dead flesh dead ideas dead dreams would i disappear or just become boundless can we keep it longer than an instant i hear drumbeats like new sprouts breaking through the death of forest floor like new awareness breaking thru the shadow veil like new planets gathering the dust of fallen stars ah to sip the spiral and become the drumbeat like trip and fall into boundless skies and craft an i of stardust and light to slip the shadow of dead humanity from off my feet to share the fleeting glimpse of truth’s nectaring blossom to hover for an instant for an eon amidst the golden floating leaves of maple trees like drumbeats like gaia’s breathing melodies volcanic thumping bass lines like eternity’s spiral dancing light of shadows

rain

randy — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 18:50:55 GMT

how long to sit in the rain? a breath of shiver’s cool shower cascading droplets refreshing my back my past cleansing the scum of dried up wet dreams the sewage of selfish fantasy or delusional fancy the moldy tire tracks skid marks on a path that leads nowhere but here and now but my path so hear now: these train tracks that racket your daddy ain’t an old man and he ain’t encased in plastic it rains harder tears sheets of ice melting the candles we forgot to light they were never blown out we can still find our way home i’ve got a lighter did i forget to show you how amidst fluorescent nightmares and off center headlights the reek of burnt oil and downtown drunkenness seagulls rats and pigeons sparechanging for crumbs and cigarettes the mist of sea level midnight there’s a chill in everyone’s soul fluttering heartbeat murmurs of crystal clear thought that eludes us and chases us through the back alleys of our mind till we meet in the heart you beautiful chunk of meat with a soul so deep that it cannot be fathomed within fragments of time -- meet me in that place and greet i with thine eyes and i shall show you mine