Aren't Labia lovely?!!!

Ladies who want to make a personal contribution to the celebration of the loveliness of the labia are needed for sex-positive fine art photography project here in San Francisco!!

Fine art photographer Joel Belmont is working on profound and aesthetically compelling project for a book and exhibition, and looking for women to model their labia. It's a study of the lines and form of the labia, removed from the context of sexuality, designed to inspire women to love their bodies, for everyone to have a better appreciation and understanding of this much-maligned body part, and to move inexorably toward the day that genital mutilation is no longer practiced on earth. The world needs this work.

The photos are very closely cropped (not even the skin of the inner leg is showing). The body part is completely revealed, but completely anonymous, completely without context.* It gives people the opportunity to see this body part outside the context of sexuality: it's a chance to appreciate it aesthetically, without sexualizing it. The photography series is about abstraction. According to Belmont, it's a study of the beauty of the lines and form of this unique body part. The series is not intended to draw excessive attention to or objectify this one part.

One hope that Belmont has for the photography series is that people will not see this part as dirty or sexual, but simply as beautiful. This body part is the human portal of life, and it is beautiful. Think of what the labia look like, and consider the line and shape of the labia, the petal-like aspects, the gentle texture, and the curves and folds. Most anyone who has ever lived was born from between these folds -these photographs are intended to elude to the qualities of the labia that are eternal, spiritual, and profoundly human.

A woman's labia is often seen as dirty or ugly, containing a woman's sexual desire -and in some cultures they go so far as to believe that this part must be mutilated, the pleasure spot cut out, the baby's sexuality destroyed... just so the men can tell which babies are theirs. Tragically, over 3 million young girls are still undergoing genital mutilation each year, primarily in African and Islamic countries. It is painful, debilitating, traumatic, and sometimes even fatal. Hopefully these photographs will challenge the practice of genital mutilation. Ideally, people that practice genital mutilation will see these photos, or even just talk to someone who has, and begin to understand the inherent beauty of this part, and begin to question their misogynist beliefs and practices. Even if it helps just one person, it has served a purpose, which is the intent of all Belmont's artwork.

It is also Belmont's intent to present these images so removed from sexuality that it challenges the notions of people who view a woman's labia as a sexual object. The labia are often seen as perverted because they are only seen in pornographic material, but here, by itself, it's simply pure line and form - and simply beautiful.

Also, for many women who grew up in body-negative and sex-negative cultures and families, it can be very difficult to see the beauty of this part of their body. Belmont hopes that these photographs will help women see and finally appreciate their own beauty. Love your labia!!!

The idea is to challenge people, but Belmont does not want to cause disgust or shock. Instead, he hopes to inspire an appreciation based on life, elegance, and the beauty of the way we are, and the way humans are brought into the world.

If you are interested in being a part of this project, and would like to model, no experience is necessary. As long as you are over 18, any age and body type is accepted, and the wide range of shapes and uniquenesses that exist in humanity is encouraged. I invite you to contact Joel Belmont and learn more about about his Labia Project. www.joelbelmont.com/lproject.html

Peepshow Minigolf San Francisco Superhero Costume Fun Mayhem

Peepshow Minigolf San Francisco Superhero Costume Fun Mayhem
Current mood: sparkly

For Scott's birthday we dressed as superheroes & played Peep Show Mini Golf at several locations around San Francisco whooping on and off Chicken John's bus. Visited Dolores Park, Union Square, Fisherman's Wharf, crashed some kid's birthday party and sang him happy birthday, we hit a yard sale for extra golf balls.... it was super extra nifty awesome.

Sniff the Magic:
www.youtube.com/watch

Thanks to molitov for taking the photo!!!

proposed 25% sin tax on porn and sex toys!!!

25% tax on porn and sex toys!!!!!
Current mood: aroused in a outraged way

Just when you thought the Government couldn't put it's head any further up it's a- *ahem*.

A tax is being proposed to tax anything "sexually explicit" including (and not limited to) sex toys, strip club fees, porn movies, pay-per-view films, lube, books, magazines, periodicals, films, videos, or photos. This is not just any tax, 25%!!!! That's a huge chunk of any industry, even a successful one. A 25% tax like this could even put sex-positive stores like Good Vibrations and Babes in Toyland out of business!!

California Ass embly member Charles Calderon, is proposing the bill because, let's be honest, no one in the gov't wants to stick up for porn, so it might just work. Calderon is justifying the tax by blaming the adult industry for the testing and treatment for sexually transmitted diseases, the law enforcement needed around adult venues, and other social services.

Clearly there's no causation between STI's and porn - people were coming home with the clap long before you could come home with that brown paper bag, and to tax everything 25%: books, art, lube, vibrators? That's just greedy and onerous. Are they even going to tax condoms? Please God/dess, I hope not, but I wouldn't put it past these nattering nabobs of sex-negativity, blaming birth control for teen sex, porn for STD's, and XXX bookstores for bad neighborhoods.

Take a moment to tell Ass embly member Charles Calderon what you think of his plan.

Charles Calderon
State Capitol
P.O. Box 942849
Sacramento, CA 94249-0058
Tel: (916) 319-2058
Fax: (916) 319-2158

There's also an e-mail form on his website.
democrats.assembly.ca.gov/members/a58/

I suppose that the *justice* here is that Calderon wouldn't know pleasure from a hole in his -

Want more?
California's porn tax: Violet Blue has serious concerns when lawmakers get in bed with fundamentalists for a 'money shot'. www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi

They're trying to Kill Gay Marriage Ruling by the Supreme Court!!!

Hooray for queer weddings in the State of California, however, they're already trying to squelch the love...

Last Thursday, the California Supreme Court overturned a state law that said that only heterosexual couples could legally marry in the state of California. The CA Supreme Court Chief decided that because Californians have a constitutional right to privacy and autonomy, the state must protect "the right of an individual to establish a legally recognized family with the person of one's choice." HOORAY!!!

However, this victory for gay marriage may be short-lived. "Moral" Majority dissenters are saying that the court interfered with the democratic process and overstepped its jurisdiction... and even conservative members of the CA supreme court are invoking the argument that if you let gays marry soon polygamists and incestuous marriages are next. I am frankly surprised that conservative Justice Marvin Baxter, who wrote the dissenting judicial opinion didn't say that those slippery homos are just opening the door for people to marry their dogs.
Also, conservative religious groups have submitted more than 1.1 million signatures on petitions for an initiative that would re-enshrine the ban on gay marriage as a California Constitutional Amendment! They are also calling, e-mailing, and sending letters to Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger trying to get him to support their constitutional amendment.

You can do something right now that will take 30 seconds and help ensure that Californians have a right to love, legally, whomever they choose.

All you have to do is call Schwarzenegger's automated phone line to vote in support of the Supreme Court's decision on LGBT marriage. It literally took me 30 seconds, you don't even have to listen to all the prompts.

1. Call 1-916-445-2841
2. Press 1, 5, 1, 1 and you are done.

You can also email or write and (btw) they don't ask in what state you live. Online go to gov.ca.gov/interact, hit email tab and select Supreme Court decision on Same Sex Marriage. On the next screen you must click PRO. It's a little confusing since we're talking about the initiative for which we are con. Just a couple of words of thanks are all you need to write.

State Capitol Building
Sacramento, CA 95814
Phone: 916-445-2841
Fax: 916-558-3160 ( new number )

Thanks for taking a moment to take action in support of what you believe. I've included links below if you'd like more information.

California Supreme Court strikes down marriage ban
www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi

Read the CA State Supreme Court's Ruling for yourself
www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions

Hooray for being able to create queer families!!!

Does too much sex cause prostate cancer?

There's a long standing body of medical "knowledge" that men who have "too much sex" or higher than average levels of sexual activity are at greater risk of prostate cancer. Prostate cancer is fairly scary, besides being way too close to the family jewels, it frequently affects men over 50, causing pain, difficult urination, and erectile dysfunction... and until you get the blood test, you probably won't even know that you have it, and it can spread to other systems. Clearly, we live in a society where sexual pleasure for the sake of sexual pleasure is frowned upon big-time, because if we go around just enjoying ourselves we won't know whose babies are whose so we know whose property is whose (and who belongs to whom), and we won't want to go to heaven if we're having too much fun here on earth, will we? Blaming sex for disease is as American as Kellogg's cornflakes and Graham crackers, which were invented by John Harvey Kellogg and Sylvester Graham, respectively, who blamed everything from tuberculosis to mental disease on masturbation and having sex more than once a week. In fact, Kellogg's cornflakes and Graham crackers were invented in order to decrease libido and squelch desire so that you would have sex less often and 'be healthier'. Historically anything horrible that could be attributed to "too much sex" often was, and sometimes still is. Hairy palms, anyone? Please.

Now, whatever the white-coats believed, it wasn't 'scientific' just to say, "God got you", so there were two basic sex-causes-prostate-cancer theories:
1. Higher levels of male hormones causes you to have more sex, and doctors believed that high hormone levels were linked to cancer.
2. Perhaps these guys with high levels of sexual activity were out there catching some "prostate-cancer-causing pathogen", but so far so such cootie has been discovered.

In fact there was a big study done in 2002 that linked higher levels of sexual activity with prostate cancer, however because the studies they analyzed primarily featured subjects that had already been diagnosed and treated for prostate cancer, it's possible that these guys 'remembered' having more sex than they were actually having at the time which was probably way more sex than they were having now, not just 20/20 but magnifying their sexual past.
The most recent study, conducted by researchers from the National Cancer Institute, John Hopkins, and Harvard, had a HUGE sample size = 29,342... and when we are talking statistical validity, sample size *does* matter - plus it matters what you do with it *ahem* anyway, they followed these 29,342 so far prostate-cancer-free men, aged 46 to 81, for eight years.

At the beginning of the 8-year study, they were questioned about the number of ejaculations (sexual intercourse plus masturbation and nocturnal emissions) they had, per month, between the ages of 20 to 29, then between the ages of 40 and 49, then in the last year. Then, every two years, these 29,342 men were asked if they had developed prostate cancer. By the end of the eight year study, about 5% of them did... but GUESS WHAT!? - the group of men with the highest frequency of ejaculation were less likely to have developed prostate cancer. In fact, three more ejaculations per month across the man's lifetime was associated with a 15% decrease in the risk of prostate cancer. So the more ejaculations you have had, the less likely you are to develop prostate cancer. When just considering the cases of prostate cancer confined only to the prostate, the correlation was even stronger, every three more ejaculations per month across the lifetime, was associated with a 90% decrease in the risk of prostate cancer. Now, in both these cases there was a statistical suggestion that men in the very lowest ejaculation frequency group of 0-3 per month also had somewhat lower risk, when compared to those with frequency of 4-7 per month. So there was some suggestion that in the very, very lowest group there might have been less risk of prostate cancer. But overall, looking at men who were consistently in the highest ejaculation frequency group – that is, 21 or more ejaculations per month, over the period studied – as compared to all the men who consistently reported frequencies of 0-20 ejaculations, those with the most ejaculations showed the lowest risk of developing prostate cancer. So not only is ejaculation fun, it reduces your risk of prostate cancer.
Take two and call me in the morning. ..
Remember, you are "shooting for" at least 21 times per month here. Better get to it.
Love and laughter...
:) Monika

High heels: good for your pussy?

According to an Italian urologist at the University of Verona, Dr Maria Cerruto, wearing moderately high heels (2 inches) might "work the pleasure muscles which are linked to an orgasm" -your pubococcygeus, 'Kegel', or pelvic floor muscles.

Dr. Cerruto studied 66 women under the age of 50, finding that women who held their feet at a 15-degree angle to the ground, like when wearing a two-inch heel, had 15% less electrical activity in their pelvic muscles, suggesting that the muscles are more relaxed with higher heels, increasing their strength and ability to contract.
So, while high heels are proven to cause stress fractures, joint problems, bad posture and back pain... they might save you from doing 15% of those 200 kegel exercises you are supposed to be doing every day. Personally, I think Dr. Cerruto is just trying to justify wearing painful shoes. She's quoted as saying, "I adore high-heeled shoes and I wanted to find something positive about them,"
"In the end I achieved my goal."
There's dubious scientific merit in a study where the researcher decides what they want to prove before the research is conducted, but I think we all know where Dr. Cerruto is coming from, "Like many women, I like high-heeled shoes, and although they are sometimes uncomfortable I continue to wear them in an effort to appear more slender and taller." Yes... don't we all.

"It's good to know they have potential health benefits." -except the aforementioned joint pain, stress fractures, and back misalignment, oh my!

Italians do seem to have a special relationship with shoes. When I was traveling through Verona, Padova and Milan, my adorable CouchSurfing host, Giuliano Giuliani, was simply aghast that I would wander into Italy with just one pair of sneakers "You cannot come to Milan with just one pair of shoes!" Oh, but I did... though I could not spin three times on my heel on the testes of the bull (it was supposed to be lucky).
www.flickr.com/photos/mon.../114315727/
Perhaps if I had been wearing heels it would have been easier... though I really don't think it's any substitution for doing your kegels, grrls. Not only do kegels help you enjoy jumping on trampolines later in life*, but they make sex better!!
For women, kegels not only enhance the pleasure for your partner (you can squeeze him tight at just the right moment), you also have stronger, more intense orgasms!

For men, in addition to being able to make your turgid wang jump (a show of which I will never tire) kegels make you last longer and make your orgasm more intense. I've even heard you can hang a towel over your erection and raise and lower your 'flag' at will (www.askmen.com/love/love_...ve_tip.html ) -go on, see who salutes!!

I'm doing my kegels right now, aren't *you*? Hooray! Better orgasms all around!!

*The Gory details: Not only does doing your kegels make childbirth easier as the perineum is less likely to tear or require episiotomy, and prevent you from wetting yourself when you sneeze or laugh later in life, but it also prevents the prolapse of your pelvic organs, which is when the pelvic floor muscles become so weak or damaged that they can no longer support the pelvic organs. (The uterus is the only organ that actually falls into the vagina, the bladder and bowel just push up against the vaginal walls.) *shudder*

Why her nails on your back feels *so* good... scientifically!

The men in white coats have taken it upon themselves to investigate what happens in your brain when she rakes her nails across your back. Dermatologist Dr. Gil Yosipovitch was apparently up all night at Wake Forest Baptist Medical Center wondering what happens in your brain during a good scratching and put 13 people in an MRI machine and then scratched their lower legs with a small, soft brush at 30-second intervals for five minutes.

The images from their brain scans revealed scratching shuts of the part of the brain that is associated with the the part of the brain linked to negative emotions and memories. The more intensely they scratched, the less activity in the anterior cingulate cortex and the posterior cingulate cortex. Conversely, scratching increased activity in the pre-frontal cortex which is linked to compulsive behaviors, and a pain-sensing area of the brain, the secondary somatosensory cortex.

Perhaps made giddy by scientific advance, Dr Yosipovitch then said "This is the first real scientific evidence showing that itch may be inhibited by scratching,"

"Of course, scratching is not recommended because it can damage the skin. But understanding how the process works could lead to new treatments. For example, drugs that deactivate this part of the brain might be effective."

Just what we need! A new drug that deactivates part of the brain! To be fair, Yosipovitch was talking about chronic itch from eczema and kidney dialysis... but when they come up with the drug that kills the part of the brain housing the pain/pleasure response, that's when I'll knuckle down and get a 'real job' with health insurance so I can afford to deaden my brain scientifically. Thanks, pharmaceutical industry, "Better living through chemistry"!!

The researchers concluded that actually this study (scratching those that were not itchy), may not be relevant for treatment of chronic itch... but actually it goes a long way in explaining why it hurts so good when our back is scratched, what makes us *want it more* (push-the-lever/get-the-pellet)... and why, when I ran my nails down his back in a post-coital cuddle, he called me "mommy".

More, more, more:
io9.com/351348/neurosc...urting-yourself
www.reuters.com/article/em...39220080131
www.eurekalert.org/pub_rele...12808.php

Two hot naked girls and no erection... why is this happening to me?

Dear Monika,

I'd like to pick that sexpert brain of yours. I just moved to San Jose and started hanging out in person with a girl I'd known for a long time, Laura. We have been friends for six years, but there had always been sexual tension, building up. After I moved here it finally boiled to a head and culminated in the single steamiest make out session I've ever had. We're at the library and nearly started having sex right there until someone told us to take it home. We go back to her place, ridiculous passionate animal fooling around and foreplay ensue, we climb into bed and for the first time in my life I can't get an erection -not even half way. The entire time until that point, I had one that could chop down a tree, but now, no go. We laughed about the ridiculousness of the situation, and she said she doesn't care, and 5 minutes later everything is working great and bam we have some of the best sex of my life. The problem is she's just interested in sex (which is AMAZING), but I'm looking for more of a relationship so we decide to be friends with benefits or whatever. Laura has a party and I meet her friend, Krista, who is incredible. I'm just moonstruck by this girl. The three of us are talking late into the night, and the girls start making out. Things are starting to really happen between the three of us, kisses everywhere, clothes are flying, my wildest dreams are coming true, but I can only get it like 3/4 up -not how it should be, not 19-year-old-guy strong. I still have sex with both of them, but I'm wondering what the hell is going on. I mean here are two hot girls! Later that night we start up again with no issues whatsoever, until after rolling through a bunch of positions, Laura is kissing and playing with Krista, Krista is on top of me, and man, is this girl beautiful. I start worrying, and lo and behold, I lose it, completely soft. I take a time out, and the girls keep going while I watch. Pretty soon it's back up and we all go at it until everyone is satisfied. I guess I'm just wondering WTF is going on. I figure maybe this is something that happens to a lot of guys but it's never been an issue for me and I'm kinda worried. I really want it back to normal so I can go back to just loving sex, you know? I'm sorry to bug you but it was just so hot with these two girls, and then this happened… is there something wrong with me?

Mike



Mike...

Gosh, don't apologize for asking a sex question. It's my pleasure and I *live* for exploring the ins-and-outs of how biology, psychology, and sexuality play together (multiple puns intended). I don't have my own penis to erect, but I get to play with them, and this downer happens more frequently than anyone wants to talk about… except the Viagra corporation, and that doesn't mean you should just go snorting Viagra. No really. Don't. It's not good for you.

Erection problems are like not being able to cum when everybody's waiting for you. He's trying to last, "please cum, baby, please cum, I want you to cum", and you close your eyes and you really really really try and the harder you try the harder it is. Whew, the pressure! Our vulnerable bits are bared, but then we have conversations that make us go deeper, get it off our chest, feel better, and then we all have ridiculously good sex afterwards because we trust each other, know our way around each other's bodies, and aren't freaking out about sex, which really goes a long way to improve sexual functioning!

Erections and orgasms are part of the Chinese finger trap that is consciousness and desire and the path to funlightenment - the more you get wrapped up in your mental state of worry, the harder it is to be really *present* and get what you want.

It's so cool that you could laugh at the elephant in the room. Ladies often think "is it me?", and if you say "I want you so much that my wiener needs a time-out. Let me [insert alternate naughty sex act here] for a just a minute" then nibble her nipples, go down on her, play your fingers outside and inside her pussy, and kiss, kiss, kiss her until you're so turned on that your brain isn't giving your penis any more problems. Or let's say that during this session you don't ever achieve the kind of erection that you want to put a condom on, what about telling her you'd like her to play with her clit while your fingers find and love her g-spot? It's hot if someone tells me to play with my clit, (not that I often wait for them to ask anymore, but it would go a long way in making me feel comfortable doing it if I was shy). Yes, "she said she doesn't care", and she really really really won't care if she's having orgasms at your hands, in your arms, on your fingers, and she'll always come back for more. That second time, you had two lovely ladies to distract each other (and yourself) from your wiener-worries, so while you felt more pressure, watching the two of them together really helped you get over it, didn't it?

The trouble here is just mental. You've got two hot naked grrls in front of you, you really want to perform, and you're freaking out about not being able to perform so you can't. The solution is: get control of your mind. Force yourself to stop worrying about it, either by focusing on some other activity and your partner, or by intentionally being present and focusing on the sensations you are feeling and letting them fill up your consciousness. Meditation can be kinda mindless, but it helps you get exactly the kind of mental focus you need. If you're not ready to meditate, the least you need to know (and probably already do on some level) is that you are not your mind; your mind is your tool. When it comes to things like sex, desire, and trusting life, our heat-seeking mammalian bodies know best. You just have to tell your mind to shut up and stop worrying. When you notice your mind start to go into a worry pattern, your mind is just babbling, ignore it and focus on her, focus on what you feel when you touch her skin, how she tastes in your mouth, how her hair smells, those gorgeous sounds she's making and literally distract yourself with the smorgasbord of sensation. Once you get into really worrying, it's harder to stop. It's like scratching an itch... it's a feedback loop of reality creation, the more you scratch, the more it itches. Tell your mind for once your cock knows best, so please shush while I do naughty things to these nice girls and feel all the marvelous sensations that God/dess gave us for loving each other. After all, sex is proof that God loves us and wants us to have fun!

Don't worry, have fun, and let me know how it goes... I LOVE talking about this you are never 'dumping' on me, I LIVE for the dialogue. Talking about sex is my True Purpose.

Love,

:) Monika

Sexploration EVERY TWO HOURS!

Sexploration with Monika is on Erotic Radio Live every two hours!

After the flurry of publicity after the front page SF Gate/SF Chronicle Erotic Radio Live is rebroadcasting The BDSM Tea Party and The Sex Robots show in rotation every two hours... go listen!! www.EroticRadioLive.com

I've also gotten a flicker of interest from an agent wanting to discuss "the possibility of a non-scripted television series" -which is nifty because it's such a good sign of things to come for Sexploration with Monika. However, I think at this point the intense scrutiny of reality TV show would wreck total havok on my bisexual polyamorous personal life, so perhaps we'll wait on that, though I'm talking to someone about doing some video on the show as it's recorded live... how d'ya like them apples? *clapping hands in glee* Hee hee hee!

There was another article written in New Jersey by a blogger who found me on SF Gate also

Monika Thomas: San Francisco's Professional Homeless Sex Talk Radio Host
americancity.org/updates/b...adio-host/

Professionally homeless, to finance the sex talk

Oh, the joy of controversy! SF Gate readers have made 225 comments so far! They love me or they hate me. One woman called me a "vitamin deficient" suicide girl (I am secretly, gleefully, flattered -hee hee, she thinks I'm too thin! That's only happened one other time, but that guy was into *really large* women).

My favorite part is when reporter Chris Colin talks about my parents, "recent years have seen interesting conversations with her parents, whom she calls "so conservative, and so supportive."

"Oh, I didn't know you could do that," she recalls her mother politely replying, in an astonished Midwestern accent, after Thomas described someone's particularly athletic sexual feat [I was talking about female ejaculation].

Or as she once put it, "I'm sorry, Daddy, someone's daughter has to talk about dildos on the radio, and it's yours."

LOL! Funny 'cause it's true! I love my parents so much! They are *so* not into having a sex-positive feminist radio talk show host daughter... but they are dealing with it REALLY WELL, and, if I don't tell my mom that women can ejaculate, who will?

Professionally homeless, to finance the sex talk
www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi