Intelligent, mysterious, and deliciously complex, Jenny is my favorite Epicurean. She is the only person I know who can classify the neurons in your brain. She can do this silently while talking to you about oppressive government policies, feminism, or her favorite quote from Milton as she simultaneously checks out the guy behind you and thinks “ I’d like to fire up his neurons.. ” She will kick your ass in any board game, and you will actually enjoy getting your ass kicked. She is a superb mime artist, a dog lover, a hat connoisseur, and, potentially, an undercover agent in the global war on frat boys. Freedom was created by the gods so she can consume it, stretch it till it has no bounds, beat it like a proud dominatrix until is squeals with pleasure. I hear she is an official deity in a dozen countries, territories, and small islands merely for her fabulous caboose. Worship her, converse with her, buy her a drink, hug her like a fuzzy teddy bear, praise her as a goddess amongst dorks, touch her with a delicate but firm grasp, approach with cautious anticipation, and enjoy!