The time rolls around for another set of goodbyes, but a set of hellos dulls the blow. I had a great time rollin’ with the RV crew at Tribal fest. Shawzy and Jerimai rock! They amaze me with their sweetness. I hope their sweetness will facilitate forgiveness for the attached photo of Jeramai's ass, but come on, it had to be done. The tribal fest was an overwhelming combination of the best belly dance shopping and performing I have ever seen. At times I would just wander through the booths wid... read more

Goodbyes
my heart hangs on loosely strung cords
slung haphazardly through out my chest
it flutters in the breeze of sadness
and the strings pull at my throat and my stomach
it seems no where is safe from this gentle attack
breath comes in shaking and incomplete
I look in to tear filled eyes and I know I am helpless
my eyes at once fill and empty at a pace beyond my control
those eyes that gaze at me with such adoration
and I can not forget that I am loved
I will never forget that I... read more

Today I looked at some of the stuff I’ve been writing and I have to wonder. I am such a weirdo. I thought this time I would just drop a note that was not so self contemplative and hopefully less manic. I got to hang out with a black bear today. Well, hang out is probably going to far. I was eating lunch in my parents yard relishing the few moments of warmth and sunshine we’ve had for a while when a black bear jumped on to the fence and gingerly walked along the posts judging me as friend or f... read more

I sit here making peace with the light and the shadow of my inner being. Exploring the recesses of my memory and the lingering feeling of awe at awakening to a whole new world that is as old as ever. This path I begin through heavily lidded eyes, weighted with knowledge of my own imperfections. Questions of a nature that only promote further inquiry gather in my unquiet mind. I struggle for scilence of voice and thought and rejoice at the momentary pearls of simplicity I am blessed with. I ... read more

The First step

Toes curl in anticipation
Throat dry, fists clenched
My heart races faster and faster
“I’m so scared!”
“I’m scared!”
I shout it again because it feels good to yell
“I’m fucking scared shitless!”
A crazy grin floats across my face for a moment and drops off the other side
I won’t look
I don’t even want to look
But I know I have to face it
Face it all
Before me a mystery
It tilts and whirls, unstable and ever changing
I steal a glance behind me at where I’v... read more