julio saez lopez- memories of a love

tonight, while going through some things to donate and add to the yard sale collection, i came across something i had long ago thought was lost.



a 17 year old cassette tape. it was the first communication julio sent me after i left spain. i haven't listened to this tape in over 10 years. it barely plays, and with his soft spoken spanish it's impossible to make out at times. but it plays. he had wanted to send me a tape instead of a letter, he says, so he could just talk to me without thinking about it, so i could hear his voice, and so he could say things he was worried he hadn't said -or said enough- while i was there. so i ran a hot bath, and listened to the scratchy staticy tape of this beautiful man's voice- who taught me what it was like to love and be loved, telling me how i had taught him the same thing. almost an hour of his voice, recounting to me his days, his thoughts, and remembering silly beautiful memories of us. he ran through the airport as my plane started to move, just trying to see my face... but he couldn't see me, he says. the tears streaming down my face, i had to laugh when he said "don't be sad, don't cry- i know you- you're crying right now. don't be sad. i love you. i love you. i love you. i love you". at the end of the tape, he puts it on the night stand to continue recording as he falls asleep, telling me as he closes his eyes the details of his imagining me there next to him. soon he does fall asleep, and you can hear his breathing and snoring and dreaming. on my worst nights, i used to fall asleep listening to him, comforted in knowing at least one person in my life had loved me so sincerely. so many wonderful memories. wonderful sentiments. wonderful words. so much beauty he was. so much love.

i found the cassette in a random case for something else. 10 years at least since i've believed it to be gone forever. it's on my altar now.

Need a gift for Mom? Check out my Etsy shop!

Hi! I wanted to let you all know that I finally have my Etsy shop up and running! I am delighted to have this opportunity to share with you, the products of my Imagination. Please take a moment to stop in and visit. I have a variety of jewelry listed now, with many other projects currently in the works as well.. such as fantasy masks, bookmarks, treasure boxes, hair accessories, costuming clothes and accessories, crocheted items and much much more! So check back often as I am continuously creating, learning, and experimenting with new ideas. :)



AND I am currently running a Mother's Day Special!!! Buy before Mother's Day and get Free shipping AND Free gift wrapping!!!


Each piece is the result of its own creative journey with many being inspired from and incorporating eccentric, rare, or vintage finds as a result of my love for treasure hunting. All of my work is carefully handcrafted with an eye for detail, quality, and durability.

Please forward this invitation to your friends and family. Thanks for visiting my Etsy site, I hope you enjoy!

www.twilightserenity.etsy.com

Hugs and Laughter,
twilight

to all lovers, believers, and appreciaters of music....

i have a movie to share with you.

"august rush"

music is all around you, all you need to do is to listen.

conscious giving

this is an article that i wrote and published in the dec issue of aquarius during the last of my tenure there as editor. may the light of love, friends, and family keep you warm this winter season. blessings to you and your families, twilight.



Conscious Giving
By Twilight



The wheel has turned. The night comes early now. The leaves have fallen from the trees. Winter is knocking on our doors. Already, lights are strung and Christmas trees decorate window fronts. Everywhere you go, stores are stocked and ready for the much anticipated influx of holiday shopping. Once upon a time, this was the season for spending time with Community and Family, and a time for rest and reflection (Yes, REST!!). In our evolution, we have lost touch with this part of the earth's natural cycle. Now, too often and too easily, we get caught up in the commercialization of it all; The overwhelming obligation to buy and give gifts. This obligation has been created by marketing and social expectations, not by any Religious belief. Even us non-Christians get pulled into this modern tradition. Let's face it, we all enjoy getting gifts! And we enjoy giving gifts and bringing happiness to those we love! But most of us here in our society have very little "need" for Things. Yet still, we get caught up in the stress; trying to find the right present for someone who has everything already, and all too often we end up buying a gift that they will probably like, just to be giving it- for the sake of expectation.




But you have a choice. We all have a choice. We can choose to not give material gifts at all, but to instead give each other our time and our attention. We can choose to give gifts that actually have meaning. We can choose to write each other poems or songs, or some other fun thing that will make us smile. We can choose to give gifts that are personal, using our talents to make handmade items that are filled with love. We can choose to give gifts that help those who are truly in need. This season, (and all seasons for that matter) we can CHOOSE to spend our time and money, in a way that help's to make a real difference in someone's life.



There are many ways to make a difference. There are many ways to help those in need. For those of you who choose to spend your time and money doing just that, I have some suggestions to help you get started:



Spend time volunteering, either alone or together with your family or community. Slow down and visit with the sick or elderly- maybe a neighbor who lives alone, or at a retirement center or nursing home- bringing warmth and companionship to their lives. Go through your house, find things that you no longer use or need and donate them. Teach your children the beauty of giving by having them go through their toys, and pick out a few things to share with those less fortunate and go together to donate them to a local shelter. Coordinate with your friends and coworkers, and instead of giving each other gifts- collect the money that would have been spent and give to a local charity or food bank. Find out what charity holds special importance to a loved one, and donate money in their name. Buy gifts that help to support organizations that assist the handicapped or disabled. Buy gifts from companies that donate part of the proceeds to a charity that you want to support.



These are just a few ideas, following is a list of organizations and agencies that can help you to begin acting on your Choice- Use your imagination, and I am sure that you will discover many more ways that you can make a difference!







Atlanta Children's Shelter

607 Peachtree Street

Atlanta, Georgia 30308-0322

404-892-3713

www.atlantachildrensshelter.com



Alzheimer's Association

Metro Atlanta Regional Office

1925 Century Boulevard, Suite 10

Atlanta, GA 30345

404-728-1181

www.alzga.org


Camp Twin Lakes

5909 Peachtree Dunwoody Rd. Ste. 802

Atlanta, GA 30328

404-231-9887

camptwinlakes.org



Rainbow House, Inc.

Post Office Box 912

Jonesboro, GA 30237

770-478-6905 or 1-877-247-3379

www.rainbowhouseinc.org



American Cancer Society

P.O. Box 102454

Atlanta, GA 30368

1-800-227-2345

www.cancer.org



Atlanta Community Food Bank

732 Joseph E. Lowery Boulevard

Atlanta, GA 30318

404-892-3333

www.acfb.org



Atlanta Habitat for Humanity

519 Memorial Drive, SE

Atlanta, GA 30312

404-223-5180

www.atlanta-habitat.org



Atlanta Union Mission

P.O. Box 1807

Atlanta, GA 30301

404-367-2244

www.aumcares.org



CARE

151 Ellis Street, NE

Atlanta, GA 30303

1-800-521-2273

www.careusa.org



Children's Wish Foundation International

P.O. Box 28785

Atlanta, GA 30358

1-800-323-9474

www.childrenswish.org



Earth Share of Georgia

1447 Peachtree Street Suite 214

Atlanta, GA 30309

404-873-3173

www.earthsarega.org



Friends of Disabled Adults and Children

4900 Lewis Road

Stone Mountain, GA 30083

404-491-9014

fodace.org



Georgia Conservancy

817 West Peachtree Street Suite 200

Atlanta, GA 30308

404-876-2900

www.gaconservancy.org



Hands On Atlanta

600 Means Street Suite 100

Atlanta, GA 30318

404-979-2800

www.handsonatlanta.org



Literacy Action, Inc.

101 Marietta Street Suite 200

Atlanta, GA 30303

404-818-7323

www.literacyaction.org



Make-A-Wish Foundation of GA & AL

1230 Johnson Ferry Road Suite E-40

Marietta, GA 30068

770-916-9474

www.wishatlanta.org



Project Open Hand Atlanta

176 Ottley Drive, NE

Atlanta, GA 30324

404-419-3317

www.projectopenhand.org



United Way of Metropolitan Atlanta

100 Edgewood Avenue, NE

Atlanta, GA 30303

404-527-7200

www.unitedwayatl.org



Atlanta Interfaith AIDS Network Inc.

1053 Juniper St NE

Atlanta, GA 30309

aian.home.mindspring.com



Moving in the Spirit

P.O. Box 17628

Atlanta, GA 30316

404-624-5295

www.mitsdance.org



Heifer Project International

P.O. Box 8058, Little Rock, AR 72203

1-800-422-0474

www.heifer.org



Captain Planet Foundation

133 Luckie Street, 2nd Floor

Atlanta, Georgia 30303

404-522-4270

www.captainplanetfdn.org



AID Atlanta

1605 Peachtree Street NW

Atlanta, GA USA 30309-2955

404-870-7700

aidatlanta.org



American Red Cross

Metropolitan Atlanta Chapter

1955 Monroe Drive NE

Atlanta, GA 30324

404-575-3730

www.atlantaredcross.org



CHRIS Kids, Inc.

3111 Clairmont Rd., Suite B

Atlanta, GA 30329

404-486-9034

www.chriskids.org

"love until you know"

(tonight, i decided part of my rite was to take a bath and write whatever came to mind. this is what i ended up with. it is the first song i've ever written. as for melody, think something along the lines of joni mitchell. :) ... blessed full moon. )



dance until you release

laugh until you hurt

sing until you cry

and love

until you find,... who- you were

until you know,... who- you are

until you see,... who you will be

in my eyes

love





grow until you become

touch until you feel

live until you die

and love

until you find,... who- you were

until you know,... who- you are

until you see,... who you will be

in my eyes

love





love until you know

love

we have come...

a friend posted this today. it was the first time i've read it, as i sit here with my cane next to me, knowing that the next two weekends in a row i'm heading to burns where i won't *really* be able to Dance. at least not in the way that i know dance.

....but every injury and re-injury and obstacle in doing so, just makes me that much more determined to be a dancer. i guess it's time i figure out a way to take back control of my body.
...........................................................

We have come to be danced
Not the pretty dance
Not the pretty pretty, pick me, pick me dance
But the claw our way back into the belly
Of the sacred, sensual animal dance
The unhinged, unplugged, cat is out of its box dance
The holding the precious moment in the palms
Of our hands and feet dance.

We have come to be danced
Not the jiffy booby, shake your booty for him dance
But the wring the sadness from our skin dance
The blow the chip off our shoulder dance.
The slap the apology from our posture dance.

We have come to be danced
Not the monkey see, monkey do dance
One two dance like you
One two three, dance like me dance
but the grave robber, tomb stalker
Tearing scabs and scars open dance
The rub the rhythm raw against our soul dance.

We have come to be danced
Not the nice, invisible, self-conscious shuffle
But the matted hair flying, voodoo mama
Shaman shakin' ancient bones dance
The strip us from our casings, return our wings
Sharpen our claws and tongues dance
The shed dead cells and slip into
The luminous skin of love dance.

We have come to be danced
Not the hold our breath and wallow in the shallow end of the floor
dance
But the meeting of the trinity, the body breath and beat dance
The shout hallelujah from the top of our thighs dance
The mother may I?
Yes you may take 10 giant leaps dance
The olly olly oxen free free free dance
The everyone can come to our heaven dance.

We have come to be danced
Where the kingdoms collide
In the cathedral of flesh
To burn back into the light
To unravel, to play, to fly, to pray
To root in skin sanctuary
We have come to be danced
We have come.

by Jewel Mathieson

so many things...

so many things....
thoughts, fears, insecurities, hopes, desires, secret wishes and love. so many things at once going on in my head. almost two weeks now that i've been sitting here alone with my injured knee trying once again to heal myself. everything is about to happen all at once, and all i can do is sit here. my head spinning in all directions. trying to convince my heart to not panic. i guess age has given me some sense of awareness, i do recognize that Change is taking charge for a bit, and i have to let go and ride the wave.... whether i like it or not. *sigh* now where the hell is my boogie board?

maybe this is how spontaneous human combustion happens. :)

someday, i still have a transformus post to make. whenever i can get over myself enough to write it out.

hope you all find beauty in your day.

trip theory- sat night

i'm planning on going to this tonight :)

Saturday, July 28 2007
Playground and Evil Empire have joined forces to bring you a night of complete madness!
>>>EVIL PLAYGROUND<<<

Featured in the main room:

TRIP THEORY
DJ Trip vs. Subliminal
[The Digital Mix – Breaks]
www.triptheory.com

We're taking it back to the old school with a rare Atlanta performance by Florida'’s very own Trip Theory. Trip Theory has been moving crowds across the globe for over a decade. Their first full length release in 1997 propelled them to the forefront of the rave scene. Trip Theory's signature funky breaks have been featured on MTV, in video games, and on countless compilations. For this night the duo, made up of DJ Trip and DJ Subliminal, will be laying down a special “digital mix” that will blend together DJing and live performance.

HERO vs EVIL Z
[Hard Dance]
Good versus Evil – a special 2x4 battle set.

DJ Hero and Evil Z will battle it out on four turntables! Both will be armed with an arsenal of heavy hitting favorites that are sure to destroy the dance floor. You don't want to miss this unique set from two of Atlanta’s favorite hard dance DJs!

NUMINUS [Breaks] RED RUM [Breaks] ZANDY [Trance]

Featured in the second room:

SECTION8 [DnB] BELROK [Hardcore] SPUNKIE [Techno/Electro House] RYZE [Funky House/Disco House] REL1 vs ERIC ZB [Breaks] POETIC MOTION [Breaks]

Information:
Cost: $15.00
Doors: 11pm
Age: 18+ with photo ID
Costumes are always encouraged!

Main Room Sound: Detoured Souls Audio
Second Room Sound: Evil Empire

Location:
Southern Mills
585 Wells Street SW
Atlanta, GA 30312

Directions:
Take I-85/75 to I-20 west. Exit at Lee Street (exit 55B) and turn left. By West End Mall turn left on Ralph David Abernathy. At the train tracks make a left on Wells Street. Southern Mills will be on the left after you cross Metropolitan.

**There will be an off-duty police officer to help park cars and ensure your safety**

www.playgroundatl.com
www.myspace.com/cyberaver
www.myspace.com/playgroundatl
www.triptheory.com
www.myspace.com/triptheorymusic
www.djsubliminal.com