Usually, I can keep a decent composure at work. I work in a lab. I R Scientisty chick. That means my brain is as huge as my ego and I will wreck you when nerdily challenged.
Anywho... here's a story for you:
This morning I decided to drink a full glass of warm water with a SERIOUS chlorophyll inoculation. HOLY HOT DAMN! WTF I HAVE SO MUCH ENERGY!!!!!
This ass-blast of frantic fun came on while I was at work.
Since then I have accomplished the following:
1. I changed my coworker's deskto... read more

I want to be there, right now...

...pushing that guy into the lake.

oh you Bastard Machine,
78 thousand dollars of LAME.
I watch you fly out the window of my lab
while the sound of broken glass is music to my ears.
Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you.
Fuck you HPLC.
Your name sickens me.
Moody piece of shit.
Fuck your over pressure alarm.
Fuck your percentage retention time.
Fuck your processing methods.
I hate you so much.
Integrate this, you plastic man-made jerk wad.
Process my overwhelming RAGE.
Integrate my fecal matter.
Now that's a peak I want... read more

After 7 months of arguing with the National Board for Massage License Exam Corporate Assholes, I have finally scheduled my board exam for next Saturday, June 14th. My deadline to take the test is midnight the 15th.
Needless to say, I will be absent from all classes, phone conversations, texting, and human contact until then.
Wish me luck, all. I'm switching gears to Super-Mega-Studying-Machine!!!!

Until Next time,
The Madame.

Sometimes, ladies and gentleman, living the raw food lifestyle is dangerous.

In the process of preparing my delicious raw lunch, the universe decided to enhance my recipe:
- mixed organic exotic greens (I don't even know half the names of them but they all taste good).
- dulse flakes, for salt and minerals
- fresh organic tomato, for color
- fresh organic cucumber, for coolness
- flax seeds, to shit better and get your omega 3's
- raw kelp noodles, cuz noodles are fun
- mixed fresh ... read more