Dreams that are written

Building new realities

aarond — Sat, 10 May 2008 00:38:43 GMT

We create our reality around ourselves, we must come to understand moving away from fear guilt and shame, moving away from being a criminal, or a victim we are moving out of these patterns, of self hate and scorn into a place beyond all this. Acceptance. I wish to talk about all the sadness I have accumulated in my life, how this sadness has motivated me too much joy, and how much I appreciate real happiness now that I have found it. I haven't found it from other people or lovers, although they've taught me greatly, I found it within myself, I came to move past all those patterns spoken of above into a place of pure acceptance. Because I accept myself, because I am not stuck in those self-mutilating patterns, things have started organically to fall into place; life has become a gift and each day a romance. This is what I wish for every person, move out of those patterns that bind you, stop allowing oppression rule over your life, and you will stop oppressing the people around you. I speak of darkness I speak of light, I am just looking into both of them and working with cause and effect, bad things happen destruction happens, so creation and nurturing can be fostered. So our "New World what shall it be, I feel and foresee very strongly a world built on acceptance of self and others feelings for mind body and soul, the real revolution starts within each and every sentient being and motivates, permeates into the all consciousness. Collective consciousness, love the self, and begin to truly see understand and love others for similarities, our differences our "New World" cultural catharsis, let's come together in love to create educate and play!

revolutionary worlds

aarond — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 07:13:01 GMT

What if we could live in that faerie tale world where fruit fall from trees that our ancestors have planted food and grain, along side healing herbs and vineyards? A world where people took turns doing every job that was important and necessary because they new that job had to be done; all people do all the work to understand what it is like. Why can’t we spend long days in the sun getting to know what makes us human working alongside one another for a collective conscious based on ethics, mutuality and pure sweet unconditional love. Love this is what we call the original voice of the gods a voice that rippled and created us, young avatars, we are not separate from that voice we sing like our grandmothers and grandfather’s chanted, our world is full of music, and theatrics, it is built on the celebration of life a feast of passionate understanding for all sentient beings, we give this we work as good stewards to our mother the seed planted by the music of yah way, Vishnu, Allah, our mother of the harbor however you call it, it motivates us to sing our lives freely, sincerely. No one would own anything and everyone would own everything, no more crime our riches would be the bridges of rainbow connections, and all would share freely. Our world is playful enthusiastic it is exciting it’s our enlightening, this is waking we are becoming awake and aware. By the way our world would have no fear, guilt, doubt, or shame. Like I said no crime since everybody did everything and got all they needed to be comfortable and equal. Our world would have no boundaries, humans could travel freely and be treated as citizens of the earth wherever they would go and they would go because everyone would be see the world and understand the importance of our evolution, because all would have the opportunity of travel. Our world would be like the ancestors taught us it should be, humble yet expressive romantic, cultured, progressive. People think in our world they think thoughts they write them down and share them, information is in every beings hands. In our world there won’t be clear cutting of forests for the slaughter of the cow, or toothpicks or whatever they produce from the genocide of the trees and beasts. Our world understands forestation, we know the flora and fauna, we understand it’s usefulness as medicine, and it’s ascetic beauty. We admire our planet as we admire our own mothers, Our world is colorful fabulous, and inclusive for all beings, people are confident happy and hold themselves in a style and grace, no low self esteems cause everyone’s empowered, no more loneliness, affection and honest true brilliance from all things abounding. People openly share life stories there travels freely, the world is an open vessel and we shall all drink from the fountain of eternal ecstasy, and simply understand love. Love no more fear or guilt or shame no more no more, just respect and honor for all living things, a capability to empathize with any energy any creature that might cross your path, all will be understood. It’s all so simple huh, we are working we are working so hard at this world we understand that war, the war inside must die, so that we may truly allow all life to be alive, free to feed our hearts our needs, all living things. No one locked in jails no more pain no more slavery no more no more no more controlling elements disrupting this planet, this is the last war the war for our minds, and if we as a species cannot learn to control our power if we cannot learn to empower all life on earth than this planet will die!!! The future will suffer as the past has all that effort our ancestors made laid to waste in a vast wasteland of pop star delusions forever.........But not in the world we are building, we are building foundations of awareness, praise life almighty for giving us such a wonderful blessing of correcting thousands of years of pain With eternal love. Our voice is our music, ripple that voice of god my brothers in betweens and sisters! This is all about the faerie tale of all of mankind coming true Heal, sweet dreamers, our loving family of music.

Foundations for true relationships in a a mad world: 5 AM prose

aarond — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 16:56:39 GMT

Relationships take a lot of work. So many of us have practiced the disposable way of dealing with the people we meet, as friends and lovers it really is so much easier to get up and walk away, flake out, not write, speak, look into one another’s eye’s basically not following through on the spiritual quest of life connection to spirit. Once you get to liking someone as a friend or a lover you give yourself to one another like a test, ABCD and F. The way we were raised was by standardized education we have been trained on tests quizzes and rote memorization, we have this methods caught in our cycle, so therefore, we test one another and as we do we discover people have faults and foibles as well as they’re perfection, the faults become apparent in most of us apparently we have been taught to grade ourselves and individuals and cultures that make up local and world society, on such a standardized scale. So for many centuries, we have been trained humanity and the earth individual relations are disposable tests pass-fail or be seen as less than perfect. But it is now in our time that people have become co-dependant on very surface experiences, humanity and it’s individuals have become a veritable pop quiz, we are being bought and sold in judgments based on guilt and fear not given the full time to take the full true holistic test of life. The full test of how we do unto others throughout our lives, that that is a true test, as most spirit text will tell, you. Relationship we all have them you know I am just as guilty sometimes, its a technocratic ADD online love affair not a lot of touching more plastic disposable mass consumerism, people within this world are so hurt by the way this world has been dictated that the social barriers are put up, people work more hours, less thinking for themselves more for the survival. Less true genuine love, and not enough touch not a least compassion for the people they pass by on the streets. Compassion to understand that you and another individual may not have the same experiences in life, that one another’s experience might be so different and so similar. The job to me at least is to find those similarities, I believe most people because of how the people of the earth have been manipulated to think have become self serving individualist, you see these patterns ingrained in our corporations governments religious institutions, we live under some oppressive majic, the majic of slavery and mass manipulation, our similarities are our freedom. We as a human race are not disposable people, every being deserves redemption, and opportunity to free themselves from the mental slavery that is ignorance caused by the poor quality mass media and consumerist spell. Breaking all this down once again, people become tests for one another all these dichotomies lies begin to make our minds move in good and evils night and days, The binary way of thinking is becoming passé in the grassroots I noticed some people working actively to destroy it, to redefine what a relationship might be if we worked from the similarities out. Once we reach the similarities, then the differences become our art, and how we work together becomes and creates culture, when we come together, we form a union for however long two people form a union, they are agreeing to test one another out, the way we are trained by standardized binary thinking. What I am urging for people to do is go beyond the testing, allow and make truth within relationships safe and compassionate, let us move beyond the disposability of one another, and let us build a culture based on humanities similarities not differences, let us create equity among all the tribes of this planet, and our own tribes and our relations with ourselves and others, be truly present, understand each person has equitable, ignorance and genius, pull out the ignorance by schooling the intelligence, empathy passion compassion, let us learn from our individuals wars and neglect of self and others and move towards making efforts in our lives to agree to build a loyal and integral world where it is safe to educate, and grow as a sage, where wisdom wakes in dreams to days. Intention what is our intention with to learn and go, or to stay grow and “know.” As a futurist I see people making efforts a green movement of well intentioned souls forming well intentioned relationships, work on these things work on keeping connection with all people don’t allow the borders from keeping you from crossing outside with all the colors we can share. Blessed be to all those who are working on personal and world awareness, of self and others, blessed to those who work on maintaining relationships despite one another’s faults, blessed to those who find beauty in all people in all lands, we are the hope of a future where "acceptance care and love" are the only government our corporation, we will ever need to help each other as human beings on this tiny planet called earth survive, actively work on finding the beauty of having foundations in the relationships we build, with one another Mind body soul. We are all one, One light burning together to light one another’s way. Loves all-ways

in love

aarond — Wed, 12 Mar 2008 04:58:10 GMT

My head on your shoulder purring like a wildcat kitten, how did we find each other my newest truest friend, observe each other for so many years, my brother and finally admit what we both new. I’ve never had this experience, a man, a man, willing to take me on, aside from my look, my style, my grace, my face, something deep inside worthy of loving and knowing and growing with, you see it you don’t fear it, no not you, Both of us stable and strong, willing to take it slowly working at becoming one, like two big cats purring, feral and wild. I am and have been ready to begin again, I trust you, are feeling the same. Like a stranger in a car you took me away, lacing me in your spirit, pulling me in, with landscapes ocean, trees, vegi-foods booze and a beautiful breeze, and conversation understanding of both of our needs. I went out into the woods from the ocean so blue with you, to a place that brought so much inspiration to you and now you bring me to it too, into it, like you brought me into your heart, you stitched me and held me there, while the bands played and bud and booze filled the air, your family around, I looked in your eyes and felt so right and so grounded, ohhhhh that hot tub was so amazing, We found each other, my friend, my brother, we found each other, deeply in each other two solid loving holistic men. I am amazed at what I have found, I could never have imagined the most precious gift that is you, my brother my lover my friend, wow, wow love my friend.

Un-ruley energy

aarond — Tue, 26 Feb 2008 20:38:30 GMT

Energy I do not hear or see but feel from the toes to the gut, I feel it being tossed back and forth in and out of me. Some lucid vessel filling and spilling awash in a sea of electricity, driven from my dreams to my daylight, I wake up feeling the pressure in my veins pushing it around, the chemicals in my mind pump in and I resound needing to ground out, touch the earth fill it with all my worth. I can’t keep the energy from flowing through and out of me, how simple life would be if I could ground out and be in peace with just me, just me. The intensity raises my magnetic capacity and energy just flows out and through me, Psychic energy flowing through me, pouring from my vessel over-flow through me, let me release and resume in my chi. Is it static ecstatic, blessed energy from different ego’s other than my own, I am so sensitive when they “call” my name they “call me home” to the flow of the happiness, anger, cheer, hope or fear of the “know” energies that are stunted, expanding. Sometimes vampiritic, dialectic with unruly tactics it’s all a little too dramatic from time to time when I am reminded of how power dynamics manipulate fates they can fly crooked or straight into this consciousness of aggressive and lavish obsessive energetic emotionally distressed but beautiful, learning from throwing and pulling in energies constantly blowing through me, like spells but stricter more direct still a bit inept in attempts to reflect, when energy is forced from or into me or you we undo, or flow through the true views of all our holistic brews our potions electricity, changed to emotions, our electricity, overwhelming complexities of mental spiritual and physical capability. So now I see the other side of the current trend is it doomed to begin again or flow on through, grounding grounding grounding, when I feel this energy understanding it, demanding it maintain it’s balance within it’s intense movements, Preferring it flow through but energy gets stuck in our emotional muck and we loose it and loose faith and luck, Tune in, turn on, plug in.

Feral Love

aarond — Tue, 19 Feb 2008 02:17:36 GMT

Lessons of love, brother come down from above me, come up from below; I’ll lift you getting on our level, until our eyes meet. Two cat gods, two wild feral wolves, ferocious chaotic, warm soft and true. I looked away and looked back and I saw you, I saw you looking back into me, and transforming as quickly as I in the flash of an eye lycanthropy I walked with my tongue our movements our mouths, deeper into soul, reading an ions and arrays of dimensions, reflecting ourselves in those dimensions how timeless and eternal our love is, has, will be. I fell back into pillows and clouds of revolutions of understanding of words between the confusion, acceptance. Acceptance, I have neglected so long. Because what I hold in my heart song, the epic majical path of this mortal coil, it spreads and unfurls riches for you my brother, my experience is yours to share, and now that we are aware of what we are, a bunch of big silly cats, morphing and meditating with the soul’s tongue and eye, we are finding deeply that truth inside, cascading into our passion without any fear, boundaries have disappeared leaving our spiritual path with one another perfectly and lovingly clear.

those who subdue the Earth

aarond — Fri, 18 Jan 2008 08:36:27 GMT

Those who subdue the earth and her people. Take your anger take your pain, send it away let holy insight reign find a balance find a way have faith and salvation will come your way. We are children of the rEvolution, we seek and search solutions potions to cure our life in each way, all hurt and shame all guilt and blame quickly melt away and shining like a fire a phoenix, an enchanted avatar, we send our darkness our personal deception away and replace it with majic, love, and enlightenment and burn any entitlement. We share for we are aware, of all fires that burn within, and this Vedic flame is our cosmic union we a driven to find solutions, to this worldly pollution. We share and learn we teach we preach we flow like rivers, ripple’s and gentle waves, let the water pour into our bodies, protect us, and nurture and bless us in cleansing water is our life story, water is life protect this miraculous glory. When we are thirsty, we are thirsty for truth a metaphor to keep you aware. Remember to quench our sons and daughters and ancestors and all mothers and fathers, let us hydrate and celebrate water as life, and water as life. We breathe in we breathe out, the voice of god is sung out or by the trees and the birds and bees, the sprit of air us safe blow away the unconscious waste of whirling technology robbing people of their lives and freedom from physical strife, trying to have better qualities of life. Blessed be to all creatures flying high and blessings to them for the sacred eye they show to me, as the wind that they float an blows through me, it takes away any systematic technocratic bestiality, back to the natural base of the kind loving true beast that I be. Earth dear grounding earth bring me back into my sensibilities let my empathy protect we and me, and remind me to treat your plants people and creatures, with equity equality and mutuality let my hands bring about the green prophecy where all human beings will be seen, and see the need to work towards love, shelter, education, economic inclusion, and all basic human needs. Bury wicked self centered greed, let us pray deeply and truthfully for those ignorant beings who stand in our way, we must find a way to wake up our people and ourselves, from a government, a demon, a fascism of corporation, we did not elect or choose, but we support, stop spending money on crap, vote with your dollars cause when we feed conservative corporations all beings on this planet loose, let these false profits fall like empires must and over throw the corporations that hate and hurt US and all people of the world too, let dear mother earth grow, and green economics fruit and blossom, may mother earth grow up like the roots of the tree of life, into our souls and protect our minds, bodies our spirits speaks it hears it, keeping all three whole, as well, we are now building bridges, growing a heaven, from the roots up to break thousands of years of slaveries spell, and no longer are we building a Judeo, Zionist, Catholic, Muslim, war mongering hell, true heaven on earth is coming, beyond world religions there is the love, the earth, our worth and it's foundations, will withstand and false temples to the godhead. The world is my church and nature, plants, rocks, people, creatures, my fruits, my communion, all things around my heart, all things that form all beings and myself, this is god, and our holy foundation. Let's work on solutions and heal this falling nation.

Dear Mother Earth, circa 1996

aarond — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 09:07:52 GMT

Dear Mother Earth, I think I should start by saying I am sorry, I haven’t been the sun you might have liked me to be, I promise I will work harder. It seems my brothers and sister’s potential as well as my own are not serving you quite the way we should, we have messed up our fragile home, caused harm to your blessed body. Mostly we act like selfish children, we act like we own you, when it is you who gave us the life we now lead. I get so confused when I see how some choose to treat you, like you aren’t really there, you must feel neglected, and it hurts when people ignore your tears, we all should understand your pain, for it is reflected in our own pain. What can I do, I am just a small man, with big dreams, all of which orbit your love for me, what can I do? I’ve tried to show others that you are there for them, like you have always been for me. I don’t know what I would have done if I couldn’t have walked through your forest, tenderly caressing your hair during the times I needed comfort you have always been here to hold me. When my tears have fallen to the ground, you never hesitated to join me, teaching me that pain can be washed away, and new life can be found in the fresh morning dew. Many times I have dove into your oceans your river’s your bodies of water, and I knew I was swimming so deep into you, into myself into others, all to envision the colors of a world most are afraid to sea. While sitting on top of the curves of your body, the mountainous landscapes, I have viewed the way both light and dark reflect many diverse ways between them. This has helped my spirit soar to new heights, when I have watched as your children the birds sing their joys of you, I too am locked in flight, it takes me away from the fight of this life, letting me know what is truly right, sing your heart-song, sing it loud. How many things have you graced with your images, with all the earthly love of your soul, your soil, how many poets throughout time, who have in turn, inspired me to also rhyme, I speak of the ways in which you have been there for them. To me mother you hold the true wisdom, beyond this time into the next, your truth, will always be there your spirit, has made my destiny quite clear. Love always Aaron 1996

Questions?

aarond — Sat, 24 Nov 2007 22:33:24 GMT

Activating your life, an accumulation of dreams, Is this your epic and mythic theme? Or are we just living in some patriarch’s dream? Living each life with unfulfilled schemes? Throughout the centuries we’ve traveled? Along same paths and many roads? Do our intentions cross or weave? Or is our heart meant not to believe? It’s doubts that haunt me? In my heart I am broken? Need of some fixing, empowerment compassion? Outside false messiahs, and false profits? Am I a victim of my circumstance? A survivor, a thriver coming into the light? Do I perpetuate my truth? The truth I have become wise of because of my oppression, from my youth? Are we empowering each other’s truths? Or are we empowering each other’s weakness? Out of the darkness? Into the light? Up from a movement? Born in the night? Heroes shall rise? Show the world a better way to survive? A reason to wake each morning involved and alive? Build up through strife? Save your, our people’s lives? Is this why you’re alive? To change the coarse of the tides? So that all of humanity is one? Until this spell weaves and comes undone? Will we live our day’s with praise? Acknowledge the teachings that come our way? What is an epic hero to do? The revolution starts in me? Does it start in you? Do you feel so liberated and free? What about the people living in slavery? Is there death and war all over this planet? You do see it don’t you? Dammnit? Is anything I am saying getting though? We must rise up and make it through? We must build a better world? Cherish the humble? All wholly as god? Not more separation? No more hatred? No more war? Restitution? Humanism? We create? War with ourselves? War with others? War with the world? Should we? Could we? Would we? Create? Revolution with the self? Revolution with others? Revolution with the world? Is it this simple? Can we claim responsibility for our own actions? Can we activate consciousness with others? Thus creating a current for mass change to happen? Huh? What? Umm? Gees? Are we twittling our thumbs? Not living by our words? Not activating the ancestors in our DNA? Are we clung up in the web? Blinded by the fibers of a deceitful spell? Removing all illusions? Fibers are weak? But control is strong? Do you see me? Am I feeling you? Are we understanding? Evolving? Finding solutions? Resolutions? Perpetuating potions? A notion to wake up? Find devotion? Self love? Love of others? Of all? Activating it? Relating? No more self sabotage? How have things become better? Moving through obsessive abusive patterns? Rising up from how much oppression? Becoming adult? Wise mystic elder? A guiding light? An inspirational life? Do we see the changes inside? As we grow into it? Accept it? Share it and reflect it? Is it like a blinding light? Are we afraid to walk into the truth? Is it to soon? “How soon is now?” When does it all begin? Didn’t it at our birth? Hasn’t the truth been brewing inside? All your life? All the loss of life, we’ve seen? People burned building a greedy dream? Don’t you sometimes wanna scream it out? Let the dogs out of the house? But what does the rage do? Do people want to listen to me or you? When we build a cage built on rage? Can we find the emotion that is crippling our approach? Can we accept one another as eternal life coaches? Is it ok to look into your eyes? To look past your pain? To find the truth hidden inside? To pull it out? Remove guilt fear and doubt? to help it thrive? So many questions? So much time? I hope the answers will complete my rhythm? Finalize my rhyme? So sign your name on the dotted line? Is revolutionary evolution? Right in our minds?

The landscape of the soul is passion

aarond — Tue, 20 Nov 2007 02:37:33 GMT

Drown me deep in the mornings stars, high upon the highest point, looking out over snow capped, steam rising in the distance, on top a medicine wheel, a doorway to the birthing ground of the past, as ghost of Custer’s last stand wander round me in these woods holding out as morning dew seeps into my pores, like gentle teardrops I fall onto earth hands wrapped in green fresh I am tied down to her, reaching in as she reaches out telling me stories of feet crossing my path my path I look back up into the last twinkling of starlight, as it fades and the air enlightens the world around, glowing green a world, landscape rising like, the movement of a serpent it appears so clear my path, I walk up this mountain because I am drawn to high places, standing on the ground in the air clinging held like roots by the mother, expanding out into the rising yellow red, blues and pinks, the father the father the sun beams out onto me as he creeps from behind the smooth lines of what appears to be a woman’s round voluptuous torso as it crests over the hillside and it begins to cast it’s shadows slowly gently across the land, how tender the father to the mother, feeding fertilizing all, the sun illuminates my eyes as tears begin to fall again for each drop a life which has been taken to soon returned to the mother by my soul, I fall down like so many have back into her arms she caresses and cradles me as I wail for all my lost loves, within her I find them, each footstep I take under beside me, they walk and wait to return, I follow my path down the mountainside back to my tribe, remembering this is why I have fought to survive to revive and put differences aside to find that path which we all share, just needing to get high higher higher, higher, we are all part of it all earth sun moon river and air, following my path I have discovered this, let us become earthen and aware, climbing up n down neon evergreen scent of summer, winter, fall, or spring, the path to our truths isn’t just a dream, climb with me to the top of this mountain and we shall truly get high, deeper drowned deep in morning stars, on mountainsides, our spirit of connectedness is becoming awoken inside.

we know rEvolution

aarond — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 09:10:24 GMT

We are looking for romance that faerie tale world we all dream of, we are creating a sacred space to become. We see the forest and the trees and we seek to save them, we put in or time to defend things smaller or larger that have no means of defense. We wander with a hunger and feed on any energy we receive, with gratitude, wisdom, and acceptance. We listen to out elders, we hear the voices of our ancestors, and we move with all the strength of our loved ones who have passed We know the plants and the mushrooms that heal, wild crafting wherever our path might take us. We dream openly we share or thoughts and spirits freely without any fear or guilt we release those lies of the past and help others claim responsibility for their actions. We meditate we chant we light candle’s and are moved by the moon. We speak to animals we hear their voices telling us to help them, for they have not chosen this world it has become forced on them. We understand there is a lot of retribution and redemption we provide space for the souls around us to grow into awareness, without shame, and with total liberation. We build little alters everywhere we give blessings to the mother and all her children who discover them, a spell for sacred spaces. We acknowledge that there are dark and light forces within this world we acknowledge that the separation is cause more harm than good and we try to reconcile the two and bring harmony to the dichotomies We feed our people food we gather like all animals that are not arrogant, we gather to share our lives and our heart songs We sing we dance we find those truly free moments when we really are at freedom, movement voice, music it is the true voice of god, and we celebrate our connection, through this expression. We look into one another eyes, we slowly remove the disguises and look through them to find the seedling of our souls, and we reach out like branches of a tree to touch hearts. We dress like we are at a festival, at all times, we have evolved past the shame of our looks and our body; we have become yogis with our vessels, and guide other’s to health with style and grace. We eat organic foods, practice fair trade, we don’t support large corporations, we vote with our money......we know our dollars will become they’re destruction. We understand our civic duties we are true to our tribes we are involved in them and bring information to them like hunter’s coming home with truth and enlightenment. We lucid dream, we understand that these dreams are true realities other dimensions, doorways into other ways of being, our dreams transcend into this world. We are healers we touch one another, we rub each other, do reiki on each other, we practice tantric sex majic, and realize the sacred dance which is making love, to be of a higher unifing plane. We are constantly working on our ego, releasing our karma, realizing how our dogma has scarred our dharma, we are humbled in the face of fame and noterity. We create, art music poetry commentary, we expand so greatly when we do this, we keep our art close like our majic so that it cannot be corrupted by the mass hypocrisy. We embody the present the past and the future and see them not as seperate but the same moment, we wish to change that moment, to create a sacred healing world, we wish to stop the abuse of our ancestors and ourselves in the present, to save the future. We are Rainbow warriors and we are the promise of the past the promise of the present and the gift to the future, we have come like one in a million and billion a trillion messiahs, we are growing in number and we will overcome the curses of the past our individual personal prophecies all lead to a world built on love. So Mote it Be Love is the Law.

Mountain morningstar

aarond — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 19:19:08 GMT

Drown me deep in the mornings stars, high upon the highest point, looking out over snow capped, steam rising in the distance, on top a medicine wheel, a doorway to the birthing ground of the past, as ghost of Custer’s last stand wander round me in these woods holding out as morning dew seeps into my pores, like gentle teardrops I fall onto earth hands wrapped in green fresh I am tied down to her, reaching in as she reaches out telling me stories of feet crossing my path my path I look back up into the last twinkling of starlight, as it fades and the air enlightens the world around, glowing green a world, landscape rising like, the movement of a serpent it appears so clear my path, I walk up this mountain because I am drawn to high places, standing on the ground in the air clinging held like roots by the mother, expanding out into the rising yellow red, blues and pinks, the father the father the sun beams out onto me as he creeps from behind the smooth lines of what appears to be a woman’s round voluptuous torso as it crests over the hillside and it begins to cast it’s shadows slowly gently across the land, how tender the father to the mother, feeding fertilizing all, the sun illuminates my eyes as tears begin to fall again for each drop a life which has been taken to soon returned to the mother by my soul, I fall down like so many have back into her arms she caresses and cradles me as I wail for all my lost loves, within her I find them, each footstep I take under beside me, they walk and wait to return, I follow my path down the mountainside back to my tribe, remembering this is why I have fought to survive to revive and put differences aside to find that path which we all share, just needing to get high higher higher, higher, we are all part of it all earth sun moon river and sky following my path I have discovered this, climbing up n down neon evergreen scent of summer winter fall or spring, the path to our truths isn’t just a dream, climb with me to the top of this mountain and we shall truly get high, deeper drowned deep in morning stars, on mountainsides, our spirit of connectedness awoken inside.

My good friend, couturier just passed from AIDS. What he taught me.

aarond — Mon, 02 Jul 2007 07:52:45 GMT

Well, well another friend, “Ultra-Paul”, just passed from one dimension Denton, Texas to the next, yesterday morning. He was one of my better friends in Texas, in Denton the town I ran for mayor of. I remember when I met him, I was 23 strung out on meth, because a meth manufacturer had moved into my house, and taken over like a spider built his dark web. So one day this interesting creature crawls into our web, he comes in holding a long purple antique wine bottle, “would you like a sip of my shroom wine” what an intro. He helped me move into hallucinogens and even more of the mysticism, historical dress and couture, showed me the ways of web majic, doing that spiritual work versus, destroying my life. So my addicted spell only lasted three months, thanks to his trippy witchy majical teaching. I decided to clear my soul find my purity my path again, I decided I was gunna go to Rainbow that next year, my little, now dreded twenty threeyear old head clearing coming into my destiny. Ultra-Paul carefully bleached my dredies, which were down my ass and he dyed them blue with pink ascending spirals. We spent weeks designing my outfits for the Rainbow Gathering (as well as nightlife, and political career), he did this for six years before I moved in 2001, Talk about tribal sheik, he spun it out for me, shit I was doing “that there” neo tribal thing in the mid nineties cause of him, a perfect comedown after my 5 year club kid stint. He made the greatest exaggerations of hippie indigenous looks for me to wear, I like to think he inspired or influenced some of my current tribes members weather they think it or not. His wares were fierce feral well-schooled historical pieces of art, I know the style imprinted in many young rainbow warriors minds, when I chanted Rainbow songs by the fire. He actually altered a beautiful green plaid antique suit for me, and I looked like the southern dandy, every time I opened for Ralph Nader I looked decked out “Green” sheik, when I was on speaking tour, he invested a lot of me and my political pur(e)-suits, making most of my dapper outfits. Can I say one of the greatest things he imbedded on me, was safe sex. My friend you see, died of complications due to AIDS, and yes he had “full blown” the entire time I knew him, 10 years. His T-cell went up and down and he was in pain sometimes, couldn’t get up for days, but he made it for many years, took pill after pill, chemotherapy, heavy heavy drugging. He used to tell me over his “cocktail,” “Baby don’t get this I don’t care how gorgeous or charming they might be to you, do not get this, it is the worst feeling in your life to have to be enslaved to this disease,” and he constantly drilled me, in a sweet motherly way for many years, always made sure he knew, I knew he wanted the safest path for me. He saw me as an investment in a better future he told me I was meant for great things so he helped me evolve from club kid to rainbow warrior. He would say, “don’t just give yourself away, you are to important of a man, you inspire so many.” For so many years I have held these truths to be apart of my movements and when it comes to sex, I missed out on a lot of really hot scenes cause well the boys (and people generally) don’t really care about themselves it seems much less me, sex always seems so becoming till the next day when you wake up and realize you’ve given your power to someone you barely know and then your stuck emotionally physically mentally responsible, now you are responsible not only for yourself but for them, and you have to trust they will have responsibility for you, unfortunately we live in a very self serving world. So this really hits a cord, I have been told by more than 8 friends under thirty that they have contracted the HIV virus recently, some of them are in they’re early twenties. I hate to say it but these are typically my friends who are struggling with they’re place, looking for acceptance from real men a fraternity for once. But getting nothing but coercive charming sex demons, with no real concern other than to get off, I know that’s harsh, people with HIV are not dark spirits but people who are irresponsible are defiantly dabbling in darkness no matter what a person’s status, we have to care about the beings we take into our lives, I say this from a very pagan point of view, there is a spiritual war going on. Unfortunately, I have noticed no concern for the younger men in our communities, city folks as well as my pagan tribe, gay culture generally has lost it’s liberation it fought for so much in the sixties. So please don’t feed me a line “Oh and blah blah blah about they’re responsibility for they’re behavior” I think generally that’s bullshit, we take responsibility for anyone we form a relationship with, whether a one night stand or a long term friendship, that is the bargain you make when you look into someone’s eyes or take them into your body. You are taking them into to your life more than anything. So why is becoming “positive” so popular these days among the younger generation, I have a couple of key factors to address. First the generational divide is really really large and is getting bigger and bigger, among mainstream gays. Therefore you don’t have people who lived through the plague of the late eighties communicating with Youngers, Youngers don’t look or listen cause they are always “right”, very headstrong these days. The olders (elder is a spiritual term) have objectifying intentions, but this goes into a bunch of issues around growing older, ageism, beauty, politics, misdirected chicken hawking. We don’t have images of wasting syndrome, Kaposi’s sarcoma, chemotherapy; these are the things that scarred my sexuality for many years as a teen. You don’t see people on the streets like skeletons anymore; you don’t have to see your friends wither like flowers in your hand. Understand I came out when I was twelve, and worked in the theatre, so I saw people falling all around me, it caused some early trauma to my sexuality, I am still working through. The cocktail for HIV has changed and people are living with it longer, with less exterior physical problems. Now they give out steroids to help people with wasting, it’s creating massive muscled guys, suddenly being positive “looks” healthy. Now it’s not fucking with a condom, it’s bare backing I can’t believe this trend!!! A selfish idiotic “way of getting closer”, more and more guys are involved, and think nothing of their partners intentions, it has become a normal thing in gay culture. Porn movies popularize bare backing, they advertise all over SF. Guys do meth, so they can fuck longer and harder, and once they get caught in it’s web they give in, to make the experience oh so “personal,” it feels so much easier to let go when your high, that excuse pisses me off, what a greedy hateful self mutilating lie. I know about sex cults where physically hot guys with great personalities, I mean hot guys (which makes it so tempting to give in) take turns on one another, sure it’s great in the moment for them, sure sounds hot, but without a mention of HIV status, or a condom used, sad, sad shit. So there is no brotherhood between gay men, it is a false self-serving brotherhood in sexual situations. It makes me hurt deeply thinking of how my friend Apollo was so passionate with me about this issue, how hard he worked to instill ETHICAL values in me, to play responsibly, sure sometimes I am overly cautious but “an ounce of caution”. I don’t want anyone to think that I am POZ a phobic, I have had a few POZ lovers over the years, I love them they are good men, I am still very much NEG, all because they loved me enough at the time to communicate and negotiate with me, and I love them for being upfront with the risks, and working with me on prevention. Unfortunately most guys generally don’t talk about the subject unless it’s brought up, which is sometimes hard to do during the heat of the moment, but brothers you gotta be open and honest either way it’ll cum out and your taking responsibility for someone’s life at that point. Remember we are gunna be in community with each other till we pass, don’t add your pain, don’t place it into other’s, it is unethical it is irresponsible and it only shows you to be a coward afraid of being forthright with your own truths, and letting your sexuality overpower your humanity and it’s truest love! So in the memory of my dear sweet generous well-intentioned friend I will not cease to push prevention and safe sex, this is what it is to be a real man, to create a brotherhood among queer men, RESPONIBILITY! It’s OK to pass up sex that feels unsafe, it’s OK to walk away if someone doesn’t seem honest, and no “hot” guy is worth a life of constant drugging and chemo treatments, and no POZ guy should put that onto someone they “supposedly” love. You will be loved by the right “hot” guy, POZ or NEG, hold out for the one who really cares enough to keep your body safe, remember there are many people waiting to love you, please, please, please hold on for the right one(s) the ones who really understand you and care about you and your wholistic health, that’s the most important thing regardless of status. Take care of your body it is your body, your vessel for life, not anyone else’s. Remember please take care of each other, POZ and NEG, we can love one another if we both choose to care enough to speak our truth. Find solutions, we need a dialogue, Poz and Neg guys need to open up talk and listen on this subject, let’s all stop denying this subject acting like it’s the elephant in the corner no one sees, it isn’t going away and if no one talks about it, it never will, it will just get bigger, as it always has. I love you all, positive friends, please don’t take offense; I am just reaching out to help us all be conscious of this imperative issue, so we can have safe space for all of us to open up and feel safe with our sexuality, and open to experiencing affection from all. Please pray for my dear friend Apollo, he has saved my life in so many ways, and I am so honored to have been in his graces, I know he has always been working through and with me and always will.

Better world

aarond — Fri, 29 Jun 2007 23:13:45 GMT

Dreaming of a better world building a prophecy of how a life could grow could know and help set others free. All I had to do was look inside, of me to know you too, for we are the hope and the promise of all dreams, we will change consciousness with our whimsical themes, this world is bathed in honey and cream, look inside and find that hedonistic scheme. We control our own path but some destinies transcend the past, through karma, dogma, dharma, we learn we begin again, fresh and new, multiplicities of ways to do things to, find the solutions to this confusion, it’s not so hard to do. Look inside our ancestors to guide us and how they have had to fight on this planet for just t a bit of so called freedom while they held fear in the night and the addictions of unjustified religions, colonial invasions, ions of hurt working it’s way through, forgive them all, US all for our misgivings, just trying to have a quality of living a life, still trapped in the same ancient strife. Is the real world war three a wall I built inside me, while I reach my hands up not knowing what it means to be truly free, while others duck down while the bombs resound around them, when will our hearts expand break through, the perimeters that keep us from loving totally fully with each breath our lives become fresh and new and look in my eyes I see you softening your gaze looking into my days and nights, a mirror of what is here and right now in the present give me your hand, and on the frontlines we will stand from our nihilism to our optimism, we shall unify the “present” within, release all those isms inside and begin again, to look into eye’s dig deep in the lives presented to you, what are they showing you, how are you growing, standing on the frontline glowing singing your heart song flowing into the truth, that you and I and we are all part of the same prophecy, and no single creature holds a monopoly over the earth’s diversities, we are one world one heart spirit and mind, it’s time to reflect and rewind, remind ourselves of all the things we been through, and share our dreams, our love, our world with all things, all things part of the one, a dream of a world built on love our time has come.

quotes

aarond — Tue, 26 Jun 2007 07:53:52 GMT

It is only with the heart that one can see rightly, what is important is invisible to the eye. The Little Prince Your dreams will come true if you make the effort to make it happen. Your community is expanding around you. me Seek vision in your voice. me If you can’t dance you can’t come to our revolution. Emma Goldman Love is like a butterfly, a rare and gentle thing. Dolly Parton Love is a doing word. Massive Attack Find the messiah inside ya. me Christ is a verb. Me You will go on a whirlwind journey this year be prepared to evolve. Me Style without substance is the ruin of the soul. Edward Abby Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great. Mark Twain Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect. Mark Twain Cherish your vision and your dreams as they are the children of your soul; the blueprints of your ultimate achievements. Anonomous "The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams." Eleanor Roosavelt Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get, it's what you are expected to give -- which is everything Katharine Hepburn Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within. James Baldwin "Where there is great love, there are always wishes." Willa Cather Love builds bridges where there are none. For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul." Judy Garland Love can sometimes be magic. But magic can sometimes...just be an illusion. forgot Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength; loving someone deeply gives you courage. Lao Tzu If you judge people, you have no time to love them. Mother Teresa Nunc scio quit sit amor. (now I know what love is) Virgil The essence of all beautiful art, all great art, is gratitude. Friedrich Nietzsche The vanity of others runs counter to our taste only when it runs counter to our vanity. Friedrich Nietzsche The first duty of a revolutionary is to get away with it. Abbie Hoffman Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed people can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. Margret Mead Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional. Lao Tzu? By revolution we become more ourselves, not less. Orwell Rebellion without truth is like spring in a bleak, arid desert. -Kahlil Gibran, The glow of inspiration warms us; it is a holy rapture. Me Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine percent perspiration. The fragrance always stays in the hand that gives the rose. Hada Baher Maturity begins to grow when you can sense your concern for others outweighing your concern for yourself.? We cannot hold a torch to light another's path without brightening our own.? I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I intended to be. Douglas Adams The heart of a fool is in his mouth, but the mouth of a wise man is in his heart. Ben Franklin

Co Counciling

aarond — Fri, 25 May 2007 19:35:54 GMT

I just wanted to offer a practice I recently picked up again that has served me and my people very well in the past. The practice is called co councilling, I kinda rediscovered it after going to a festival recently, where I had a great time, but in the same note I found myself being to serious with some at the wrong time, at a point where they were just tring to have fun. Thankfully no one took my intentions the wrong way but at that point it snapped in my head, years ago in Austin Texas I was helping to run a needle exchange, I had to co-council the addicts and couples that I worked with, and amazingly when they were responsive I was able to help them help themselves off of the drug or into a healthier relationship. I realized at that festival that yes alot of exchange needed to take place but perhaps in a more focused personable manner. Since I have opened myself up to this different friends have been comming to me a few I have offered it to a few have sought me out. It's funney how I let all my hurt blind me from my emotional healing side, I really do thrive when I am doing that work, it's been very healing for me as well. And in the past few instances I have worked on people, we seriously have felt a shift in our conciousness. It's kinda like reiki your not only giving it your recieving it, and so when this method is passed it seems to spread pretty quickly with amazing results, and creating a more fluid path for our unity towards revolution of collective conciousness. So just some key things about co-counciling: 1. It can be done with anyone, set aside some time with afriend you feel a bond with, say to each other we need to focus on these issues, and it's very important to check in "when could we do this" I always like the "how about now" answer, because its immediate and doesn't allow people to linger in thier difficulties or let situation perpetuate. 2. find a sacred space, or a coffee house. 3.Sit down and state your intentions, stating intentions will give you a way of redirecting if the conversation digresses you can go back and say but "let's deal with this issue or this intention of hurt at hand." 4. Own your feelings, but understand the person you are co-counciling with or you, may need some proding in the right direction, so instead of saying "you did this or he or she" Say when "you/they make/made me feel this way I am hurt for these reasons." 5. Anger is a false emotion, but we all feel it, when your are angry with someone it is important to redirect and recognize that that anger is really caused by hurt, "your not angry your hurt, what has hurt you?" How many wars would end if people could just work through thier hurt, hurt is the sorce of anger and rage, be an adult be honest when you are hurting, so it doesn't have to escalate into anger, being honest claiming responsibility, really makes you a stronger adult, the weakness comes from those who brood. 6. Co-councilling is a two or three way street, one person cannot think they are more together, better or worse, co-counciling is about getting onto the level, looking in someones eyes and knowing that they are just reflections of you, and when you make that soul connection you can move into the meat of the situation and not the into value judgements, you might have. 7. When co-counciling or mediating with couple allow them to do the talking, if they start to sway this is the time to interupt as a mediator, but only enough to help them get back on track, mediators are present while co-couciling is happening, just to hold space for the two that are in conflict and perhaps if they ask you question answer them honestly without choosing sides. Anyhow I would love to teach this technique to anyone who might need help anyone who's had some trauma that is lingering or controling them when I am available during the day, I am open, I really am a healer and want to expand on this path use the resources I was given. I can do this free or if you maybe wanna take me for lunch or dinner we could go through a session and then you'll know it and be capable of sharing it with other family memebers in need, it kinda like the ripples of a pond once it starts going. It really can shift conciousness in a really large way really quickly when we get past all the pian we can turn that hurt into art music and culture, a much better focus for our existance. this healing is part of the true revolution that will eventually heal all hurt "lost" souls, may we all truly be found understood, and bring one another into the light blessed be, Aaron 415-341-6976 here's the wikapedia link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Co-counselling Aaron Dolson 415-3416976

Path

aarond — Mon, 07 May 2007 21:12:05 GMT

A path cast in love and pain this man will rise again always unfolding like a pheonix i rise to claim my path Fire flame it is my name bringer of light always I have fought to give a good voice to what is right, to find that which is lost I stand like a candle against the wind if I blow out my heart it will ignite again. Like a million little stars so distant so close I recognize my shadows their ghosts, ancestors falling around I resound again and again give voice to thier names, I wake from my lifetime within dreams a different man today, reborn each day in that way I am learning to play, I wake to this world I say am I going the right way? I try I travel to distance hillsides, beachs inside those little biomes hidden, biomes inside are part of me part of my life. could I ever deny or say I won't try to rise up lift up again and again I walk my path sometimes so close, am I real or am I the ghost look at things really close understand my body as my host, respect it reflect it, feel and project it it's majic to be a man growing and knowing where he stands, has stood, by a brook or in the hood I do what is right I do what is good I become better I send out my bottled messaged letter's and wash my stories on shore's Quench my dreams my desires with your's we become pure, purely unconditional love we-I will rise above and build a dream into reality a loving beautiful rich immortality, like you and I have always seen we be growing knowing rising and showing. keep the heartsong floating and flowing rise up stay direct on the path build a dream a reality that will last this is our future preasent and past.

Journies to hope

aarond — Fri, 20 Apr 2007 21:24:34 GMT

I have learned so much these past few weeks learned alot about life, death love forgiveness. So many things to process all things that are making me a stronger wiser more loving and well intentioned man. I feel completely different, like a completely new man, amazing stuff, really focused. My love for Matt and the experience of loving fully regardless of physical boundries, I feel has helped me know that as a man I can love whomever I meet that I just need to take the time to mutually understand, get on the level, be real. I think back to my past relationships with many of the men in our tribe, and think wow I thought my intentions were right, at the time, but wow how did I come across to them, even if my intentions have been wholly, I know my rugged roadworn physical form has projected a less than appealing image to some. I have had problems all my life that caused neediness, clingyness, I know now comes from the neglect and abuse I suffered as a boy and adult. I know that I have sabotagued what might have been a good wholly experience, because I haven't been on the level. I am more and more aware, and more and more stable and sure of these factors. I would like to ask forgiveness to any of those men who wanted to love me, who had the right intentions, but that I let down through my actions or behaviors. I want to forgive the men who wouldn't even give me the chance for acceptance because they heard rumors of my unruly behavior, I am sorry I haven't been able to cross that barrier to true affection with you, please forgive me for not being present and real in your lives. Like I said I have changed I know that I am a brillant warrior, that I am worthy and desearving of love from the right men, men who have patients and compassion for the road that I have traveled upon. I know I have so many stories and so many more vivid beautiful experiences to share with my community, and I am going to work very hard to help others understand themselves and me. I am going to be a present, be present, and make sure my actions and words, work in unison to create harmony and love for all those around me. I am headed to SMS next week, funny i have been going to Short Mountain Sanctuary for ten years, and never been to a Beltaine gathering there. I know I have new information to share, rebirth, I know many younger and elder faeries look to me for many reasons, for my path, my revolution, that they are seeking wisdom in this, and of coarse I too will learn so much from thier experiences as well. So keep me in ya'll prayers, Matt will be going with me, he loved the Mountain, always dreamed of having a little farm with me out in the woods, someday we will, my angel. Anyhow just wanted to check in with everyone, give my love and let my peeps know where I was in my healing process. Thanks once again for all the support over this past month, you all know I love you very deeply with the right intentions, and that I know in my heart we are overcoming these present situations with the world and a new day is dawning where no one will ever feel alone and misunderstood ever again. Keep the revolution growing and your heartsongs flowing. love life and light Aaron

my heart is so broken : (

aarond — Mon, 02 Apr 2007 03:40:20 GMT

It was three aclock when the LA coraner called me, my lover, my lover the man I have been talking and sharing my deep being with Matt Brown has died. She said I was the first she called. Matt and I had a very vibrant and budding relationship, I am deeply in love with him, he understood me and accepted all of my quirks and ideas, he understood me. We never met physically I never even saw close up til pictures today, yet for 2 and a half months he was part of my daily ritual, we would download and offer support and loving romantic words for each other, it was a true bond, goddess how I love him. He was dreaming of moving here with me to be my husband as we called each other, we really needed to be together. Matt baby I love you so deeply I wish this wouldn't have happened,I am lost in tears. love you husband always and forever, Aaron

so let me just say

aarond — Sun, 01 Apr 2007 11:31:59 GMT

I hate fame and fortune, I absolutly detest people who are in it for the money, and I work with a lot of those people, many of my producer friends are quite aware, I will not deny themthier individual efforts, but what bothers me is when those people do not claim responsibility for pushing and promoting the wicked destructive capitialist system that creates all the worlds violence all the worlds crime and cultural destruction. So it's ok for us to talk shit about Iraq, or homlessness or AIDS, but what the fuck about our own little self serving bitchy arrogant "faux" destructive scene? You know whatever! I could elaborate on how leftist are as bad as rightists, we are all over privlidged unconcious manipulators, but whatever follow the fucking leaders we buy into the bullshit of celebraty and "idolitry". All this while those of us who have actually done tangable shit to make the world a better place get frowned upon because we aren't, well we aren't in the "in crowd", oh whoa is me and my efforts, keep eating the leftist pacifist bullshit fuckers, change starts with you, fame and fortune is noting, fame and fortune is garbage in need of some serious "humble!!" recycling,like many of our scenes are growing stale. The true revolution is the personal knowledge of what you actually have physically done to create a better world, and the respect you give "all!" i mean all people! ( even the "poorly dressed"people)! Get over yourselves! I mean this to the (seriously) dozen scenes I am in! (oh you thought you were the only ones, hummm so flattering to behave so pompously) we are all guilty in my judgemental educated authoritarian anthropological eyes, I mean this travisty is including me! (although I am person from both poverty/privlidged concious) we are all quilty of propagating arrogance and promoting self rightious ideals. Break the wicked material "cycle of violence" become truly active in change, stop putting your spirit into things that are not improving your own life and the lives of all people on this planet, and our mother earth. This is constructive critism, I am not attacking individuals or disempowering truly progressive scenes! But read it learn it be it, I am neither above or below I am on the level, let's lift all people to the level and let's stop looking down on those who may or may not be part of our scene, let's work on being compassionate innnovators let's work on being animals, and then let's fully become human beings! with empathy and love, Aaron

Judgement vs. Advise, and the inbetween dicotomy

aarond — Sat, 27 Jan 2007 00:39:46 GMT

From outward appearances we all have our different dimensions, to everyone. One person might think you an idiot while another sees you as god. I attempt in my life to see many different sides to a person to look at them more rationally than momentary judgments. Sure it's fine to say live in the moment, but don't we avoid our history and our future, at times our wisdom? "The present is a gift so use it" my mother would say, I see the past and future as learning experiences, but to me the present is the point of solid realness the effort you put out, what you do outweighs what you say, but both are reflective. "Love is a doing word", I try to approach people with compassion, concern, and enlightenment. Unfortunately sometimes my intentions seem awkward, I do understand what I am doing, I am trying to help my people rise up above oppression, not cause it. I try to speak directly to the point, face to face in the present, I try to see all sides of a person not just what other people say about them, but that multiplicity at the core of they're being. If someone has been created in a negative way to me, I try to know them and understand them even more, what makes them react, so adversely? I am not the type to hold judgments in my head, I tell people, "what I hear is from compassionate people," and it always is. I am concerned about reputations. I am not a gossip, I do not participate in it when people speak it I redirect the conversation towards a more compassionate "co-counseling" approach to the person they are speaking of. I am human and react too, so sometimes when people don't like to hear my version of truth they react adversely and I react and a conundrum is made unfortunately. This happens very infrequently but when it does, I have to fight the Scorpio off pretty hard, very difficult but as I grow wiser it becomes easier to balance out that animal side, and aggressive human side. Recently I wronged a friend, and he wronged me, this is the stuff war is waged on. I am a man of peace but it is impossible to get that through when our egos are colliding. I saw him and because I rarely see him I broached him with the possibility to talk about what he calls "gossip" and I call "concern," from people who would like to seriously be his friend. It was not the right time, in that way I was wrong, but when I brought it up I did it in a positive way, "I would like to talk to you people talk to me and I am concerned about you". He seemed interested at the time; he said he'd talk to me, later. It was his lunchtime, in that way I was inappropriate. Honestly I really don't like holding "judgment for other people's needs" in my head. It's not my place to tell others how to live? I am not my brother's keeper? I don't know if I am sure of those things anymore. There is a balance; we must discover it constantly if we want to create a revolution of tribe and community. Who wants to be surrounded by yes-men, building "megalomaniacs", people who are so in awe of our ego that they don't want to speak with us about behavior patterns that are proven over and over to be unhealthy. "Check yourself before you wreck yourself," I do have concern for my sister's in-betweens and brother's! If you become addicted to speed, as your family isn't it my responsibility to say hey brother I love you too much to let you destroy yourself in that way, the same goes for any addiction I see my friends in, sex, religion, television, complacency, I just don't allow that shit to pass, no ones dying on my watch. Mind your own business blah blah blah, it is my business when my people and my culture are being destroyed by vampires, and becoming vampires in the process, it is my business when I can't walk down the street without seeing the pain and suffering that mass consumerism is causing, and knowing how people are treated as soulless objects to be used for energy and disposed of promptly. I try to advise from this point, I try to bring my friends back into the light, and I do not stand idly by and let my friends commit suicide. I truly believe in revolution of self, community and practice it like yoga, every single day. I am not perfect nor do I want to be, because I would never learn a god damned thing if I was perfect, it is privileged self serving and boring to try to always be perfect. I have this socio-anthro degree, 5 years of counseling heroin addicts, but I need to learn to advise gingerly and appropriately sometimes I have no tact, guess that's from working with street people. Malikah used to say to me "you say things that really should and need to be said, but your timing is totally off." I shouldn't have approached that brother at that moment I know this now but in that moment I wasn't being present. It is sad because he really needs real friends and I put him in an awkward position, a defensive position, my timing was off and so now I have to work that out, I only hope he knows my intentions were not to harm him, but to make him "whole in my head". I really meant well, but the road to hell right? But whatever I am not going to hold judgments in my head about anyone, whether they be good or bad to many unspoken judgments have held them against me, when I wish they would have spoke, they didn't care enough too. I want to lift my people, but I am human, I am learning how to balance just as much as any being in the multiverse. Negativity is a learning experience, bad things happen so good things can come, chaos to order, and there is a rainbow of ways of looking at important issues in between all the dualism. I guess the moral of the story is don't allow gossip, redirect it towards compassion, speak compassionately be compassionate, be appropriate, know your timing, but don't hold in opinions or truths for too long, speak directly to a persons face, come from a place of personal and spiritual concern, don't let a person's suicide be an acceptable fate, family shows concern consistently, most importantly learn to forgive people, learn to accept what they offer as a learning experience. These things will help you become a better richer person. be good mediator's, stay real As alway's Ahoe to the rEvolutionaries Aaron D.

Collective Kindness

aarond — Sun, 07 Jan 2007 04:58:29 GMT

I was out of the underground tunnel at Powell by the Apple store. People were all hustle and bustle, I looked down and saw a woman lying on the ground, she wasn't like begging for anything’s she was just laying there. I felt the sadness, the hunger in her eyes. I mean real hunger not for booze or drugs. She was weak from not eating, she hid in the shadows right by the base of the elevator people rushed by, she just watched I am sure all day, in her weakness at these people so self-important so entrenched in fiduciary wealth. They would never notice her, it's hurts to be hungry and homeless, it hurts so bad to not have anyone's concern or love, or understanding I watched her for a moment as I walked up, " hello how are you tonight", "hungry" she replied but barely spoke, I smiled and walked past her up the elevator. I was at the top, and then I thought to myself, I had worked all day at Cafe Flore, I didn't make a whole lot just pocket money, enough for a few nights out. Whatever I am going to buy that woman a full meal! Karmic Kablaam! Just as I said it I looked down a really nice mid forties family looking man walks up to her smiling like the sunshine, "here you go" and he hands her two of those large restaurant containers. Wow I thought it at the same exact time it happened or I picked up on this man's telepathic energy, kindness is catching! Even among all these business people and capitalists, there are windows open and other people are looking out, looking towards creating a more beautiful world even if that man was one in a hundred thousand that passed her that day, he had the kindness to follow through, to take responsibility for this woman's body mind and soul. What a miracle, and I felt it, I felt her and him and the connection and I walked away and I prayed for it to expand......... as one does this so shall all. For many years I ran a Food Not Bombs, starting in Texas, Austin, Dallas, eventually Eugene. I fed people we gathered together, we ate like animals should, together. Over twenty thousand people I would say, we gathered together, we spoke of our truths, our stories, our travels, people aren't so different once you break bread with them. People open up cause when you feed their bodies, you feed their minds and souls it's whollistic majic feeding food with truth. What a world we will build, for many years since I was a small boy I remember visions, visions of a world where people work doing joyful, artistic, loving, and festive things, I have visions all types of people smiling at one another helping one another, no one is hungry, no one is a alone. No one is trapped in a reality that is a CAGE! of materialism, greed, the illusions of things were gone and in no ones soul would you ever find them. People had homes they would come out of them each night, each bringing something to this long table surrounded with trees and earth, the earth she was happy again, she glowed and her bounty of food flourished all around, no one was ever hungry, never again would anyone hide in shadows in shame, afraid of their situation. I feel it so strong it hurts, my tears roll down. Understand one another! Understand strangers! Love unconditionally all people! I love the capitalists, I don't like the selfish self serving behavior, but it's not their fault, it's unfortunately how reality is scripted, they're just asleep too comfortable, enslaved.........guess what we can write a new script, we can and are emitting revolution every day by being giving and allowing ourselves to see one another as miracle’s of life not products, or standards, but wholly righteous energy. I see the future do you? I am writing my script have been all my life, wait till you see it, a legend of human liberation to behold, all these years I have worked to do what is write and to write and write and write and to stay on the write path, the red road the quest the epic of each life on this planet what a reality we are creating what a miracle to behold. Kindness is cathing keep it growing! namaste and love Aaron

Passion always more passion

aarond — Thu, 07 Dec 2006 06:23:11 GMT

Passionate voices inside my head Tell me let go Be instead! Liberate the madness, Awaken myself. I reincarnate what is dead, I am resurrected from my pain To my passion, With souls abounding around My voice Like a bird of paradise Let’s out a heartfelt sound, I am love and I am loved I let it resound, Do you hear it? Feel it? Share it? And these people places and things They carry all of our names, We wake we free, to invoke Our lives Our earth Passionately! For a very long time in the back of my being I was deceived and deceiving My whole self-hurt, Was disconnect from all Blind from… What was right in front of me? My passion was my anger Adrift in an endless empty sea. Then one day I washed upon the shore To find those birds of paradise, trees, flowers, earth! Mother Earth she feels me more and more, I feel her and I adore. Inspired I enquired deep inside of me Put my hands on the earth mother Mother please let me see, Let me be the man I know I am, and shall be Let me find survival for my people and my planet Passionate thriving her vines as our spirits are rising As my hands felt her, and my tears fell onto her She took me and cradled me, Fed me my worth, She held me

Help me find a place!

aarond — Fri, 01 Dec 2006 06:45:41 GMT

Hello friends so after a month and a half breakup with my boyfriend I am finally ready to move out of my place. So I am asking my friends first to maybe help me find a sacred space for me to explore myself and my mystisism. I am really looking for something in the Inner City Height, SOMA, Hayes Valley. Alamo Square, Castro, Warehouse, Shared Space, preferably. Ya'll know me, my power and potential, I just haven't really had a good space to focus on my arts spirit and career since I moved here, now that my career is taking off I really need to focus on my art and soul, I am all about producing new realities in these dynamic days, it's very important for me to focus on writing the evolution. I have a very good and long rental history, and have lived sucessfully in many co-op style housing situations, plus am a great vegi cook, and homeopathic wildcrafter. I really want to live with creative compassionate open spirited people, people who understand vibrations, who are functional family, eat together, share space, but respect privacy, don't mind visitors, listen and understand each other's opinions, somewhat hedonistic spirtiually and politically attuned types. I guess I could move in any time, and will look til the right place becomes available. Whatever also If you want to get a place specifically with me, we might be able to go in on some sweet pad or warehouse, I have green energy, and a blooming career, would dig living with other wise gurus, goddesses, witchs and wizards. Get a hold of me, sister's brothers and beings inbetweens love you all! Aaron 415-341-6976 I have deposit and I can spend 500 to 800 a month, depending on the space.

Rebirth day

aarond — Tue, 14 Nov 2006 00:28:02 GMT

Well here I am sitting in my living room on treasure island, after a long weekend of parting. I had a great time, hanging out with the Protection cast and crew, I love them more and more, such wonderful fun and loving men, real brother's, from another. Went to the Scorpio ball, watched OOOH Ahhh's and Da Veed's set, cool cool stuff but the fine ass boy dancing next to me had a better "thing" to occupy me with, ta da. Went to the Eagle tavern Sunday with Paul, lots of awesome friends showed up, I drank to much Maker's and water, (my liquer drink), and this british skinhead festival producer, became totally smitten by me, he he, love those roughnecks. I have clean shaven head right now so I have been getting a lot of sexual attention, so fresh I guess, all weekend I got some good energy from everyone, thanks for making my B-day weekend so good. I have been going through another transitional period. Paul and I are now lovers, no longer boyfriends, which has worked out better than I thought, and we are still affectionate but it's not all weird and codependant. I have been hanging out with other boys, which is great, I have shut myself off from friendships for fear of hurting my BF, for a long while, it was my fear not his. I really just needed to feel comfort allowing my emotions and sexual prowess to flow freely. I think after years of denying myself sexual experiences I have just had a catharsis, I am a Kinky Tantric Warrior Shamen, I am really good at healing through affection. I was always so afraid of being a "slut," but ya know that shit comes from being a gay boy in Texas, I was very repressed, alot of people who grow up under oppression have problems excepting love or lust. Social engineering keeps our self esteems so low down there. The men I have been meeting are my friends and wow they are interested in me love my wild mind and are concerned about me, they enjoy my company, and we have fun together, like my brothers. I feel very open these days very confident, very stable mentally. I have been working out regulerly, my bodies coming back and looking good, I love exercise I can do so much more when I am fit. All this and my careers are doing very well I just did a set for Medjool for Halloween everyone loved it they asked me back for new years, and I have a film I am doing the set for in two weeks. I guess I am saying I feel I have been getting myself together over the past year. I feel solid I feel smart, sexy, stylish, confident, I haven't felt as strong spiritually in years, it's good to find perspective, and the rain outside is helping I feel very clensed by it on this my day of rebirth. I Love ya'll thanks for being here and there for me, thanks for being my friend.