had the big ultasound this week. it was so cool to see my little boy moving around for about an hour. now we just have to agree on a name. want something orginal, unique, and not so crazy that he'll be embarassed. keep tossing around the same few.
can't wait to meet the little man.

went to the dr today and heard my baby's heartbeat. ticking like a very strong clock. i still get nervous that something will spontaneously happen, but so far so good. i have gained weight finally...never thought I would be happy about that. but I am. new clothes. new home. now I just need a new job for next year so that I can afford additional health insurance.


the pic is from my 8wk ultrasound. the kids the size of a grapefruit now.

there is a car that is always parked near my house. the guy always sleeps in the car. there are usually blankets, food, and the smell of smoke (of some kind, but not really cigarettes...hmm). i walk by it daily, no one ever bothers me and i never bother them. yesterday, i walked by and the windows were busted, the back of the seat was missing, and the steering column was busted. There is some leftover trash and food, but the guy is gone. i can only imagine that the guy didn't pay somebody for something. it made me thankful for what i have, even when things are going rough.

my life is getting better. i have tried to stop wallowing in my self pity. i got a call for my first job interview of the season. so i am feeling positive that difficult situations will improve.

what a difference a few days makes.