I was playing around with the idea of Mash ups and more of my Mandala vid stuff and came up with this:

www.youtube.com/watch

Thanks Karen, I'm not sure that counts but I guess I should get it out of the way as well....


1) I was raised as one of Jehovah's Witnesses. I still to this day have a slight phobia about calling strangers or knocking on doors. When I was young I would go to my friend's house and wait for him to come out because I was too afraid to knock on the door.

2) The first Job I remember having was working in a stable taking care of horses that people would rent to ride through Palo Duro Canyon, a state park that my hometown Canyon was named for because of it's proximity to the real canyon.

3) I really believed I would be a virgin when I got married. My High school sweetheart took care of that when she said "Don't put it in. Just put it against the opening." Shortly after, the sound of angel's trumpets were drowned out by the sound of her parents tearing through the house hunting for us. We hid in the closet in the dark trying to put the handful of clothes we had gathered back on while trying to keep the door closed as both of her parents tried to open the door. That's the only thing I can remember about loosing it, and I'm not even sure I had at that point.

4) My Mom sent me off with her Boyfriend Big John to teach me to be a man at the rip old age of 15 to work as a welders helper on a gas pipeline. Although I did make more money that summer than any of the other kids, my career ended when I was told to get into a ditch and hold a piece of 2" plate steel against the end of a 3foot diameter pipe while the welder tacked it on. I should have got out of there when a crew of guys with fire extinguishers gathered around the ditch. I woke up 10 feet down the ditch with the giant piece of steel lying on my chest, and the world filled with a white cloud that seemed to have feet walking around in it above me. I lost most of my eyebrows and some hair off my head, but was ok other than that.

5) I've turned the legal drinking age 3 times. Once I was arrested and was in the process of being rushed to the emergency room because of a suspected drug overdose after an episode of cliff diving with my older much drunker friends until I told them we had been drinking tequila. Then we were rushed to jail. I was let off because I was underage and had obviously fallen in with the wrong crowd.


6) I moved to Tokyo at 25 where in less than 2 months was the featured DJ at a small club that even had a lifesize full-body portrait of me on the front door. The club's competition hired me to work at their new "Big Deal" club just to spite the other club owner where I DJed for over 4 years. My head swelled to enormous proportions since every foreign band that came to Tokyo would come to our club when in town.... not to mention all the models and actors. I was fired for dancing Lambada one night while I let a Gypsy Kings record play. At least that was the official reason.
The real reason was that a few days before these two girls had decided to stand out on the balcony at my place naked stopping traffic one aftermorning until the police were called in full view of the club owner's living room. It wouldn't have been so bad but one of the girls was my manager's girlfriend.

7) I was once stranded in Thailand with no money. I was rescued by a lovely English girl that I had just met who got me a job as an extra in a Korean movie. My Job was being taken to exotic beaches all over Thailand and "acting" like I was having a great time playing around in a pair of speedos with her -my new girlfriend on the beach in the background of their shots. My Mother, in the mean time, had called every government agency thinking I had died and had arranged to have my personal effects shipped home from Japan. Fortunately she received my postcard just before I contacted her or I actually would have had to shave my head and swear to her that I had been in jail.

8) My first Job after returning to LA was as the head of the Graphics Department of the snooty fashion company Chrome Hearts and was the only designer on the payroll. I used the healthy salary to take trips to see things like a total eclipse of the sun in London and The Pyramids in Egypt for the Millenium celebration which we had to sneak into using fake press badges my GF had got from a Private Eye she knew in exchange for showing him her naked butt. While there we had to use a diversion to sneak past armed guards on camels and ground guards with rottweilers since we found out nobody was allowed past a certain point on foot and it was impossible to even get close to the cars and busses that would only rairly roll through wearing people like wigs. We had been walking for miles in the desert trying to at least see or hear some sign of the pyramids or the secret "press" entrance that we and thousands and thousands of other people were trying to find.... After seeing that we had somehow gotten past the guards that were by then in hot pursuit of us, the crowd charged the guards overwhelming them allowing us to get away...and then the story just gets stranger and stranger but another time eh?...

Next job I got was working for a Harley rental company making min wage... haven't held a real job since...

Really I'm much better now... I promise!