What I Was Thinking While I Was Here

It Takes A Milledge

beachbum — Tue, 30 May 2006 19:52:14 GMT

Lasto Milledge :clap-clap clap-clap-clap: Lastings got the call today. Going to Shea to play RF tonight! Full story is of course over at NYFS (nyfuturestars.com). I jump up and down with glee for Lasto and hope he kicks some serious butt. I love when guys you watch really work for something achieve it. That kid took a lot of just wrong negative BS press and has just risen above it by playing hard and being silent and unassailable. I admire the heck out of that kid.

Finding The One

beachbum — Tue, 30 May 2006 15:57:29 GMT

The outcome of a long weekend? A lesson learned from Morpheus: Sometimes, finding "The One" is a function of believing in their existence AND continuing to search, with that faith in your heart...even if maybe The One, doesn't even believe that that's who they are....or even if the Oracle tells them they are not The One. If YOU believe they are The One, that may well be enough. :) At least enough to buy you some time to show them that maybe they are in fact The One.

Using The Love Formula: Acting Like An O'Toole

beachbum — Thu, 25 May 2006 16:25:47 GMT

From The Movie "Creator": Peter O'Toole as Dr. Wolper, an eccentric university professor, trying to clone his dead wife. O'Toole lurches perilously through a chemistry laboratory, bludgeoning everyone around him with his lethal charm. O'Toole plays a Nobel Prize-winning scientist who lives in the grip of an overwhelming obsession. He believes that he will someday learn how to clone the genes of his wife, Lucy, who died 30 years ago. O'Toole steals equipment, funds and laboratory assistants from his university, although not without the bitter opposition of his lifelong enemy, Prof. Kuhlenbeck (David Ogden Stiers). Soon after the movie opens, O'Toole gathers two new recruits to his side: a young lab assistant Boris (Vincent Spano) and a nutty undergraduate (Mariel Hemingway) who has a giant crush on O'Toole. Boris pursues the lovely Barbara (Virginia Madsen) with somewhat greater alacrity than his degree. The following conversation develops between Boris and Dr. Wolper after he starts to get to know Barbara: Boris: How did you know when you were in love? Dr. Wolper: The Love Formula. Add up the number of times that you think about the lady each day. Subtract from the total the number of times you think about yourself each day. If the remainder is more lady, and less yourself, then it's love. Boris: Oh, I've been thinking about Barbara a lot lately. Dr. Wolper: What's so very neat about this particular formula, is that "a lot" plugs into it beautifully. Boris, would you and the subject of your computations care to join me at the beach house for the weekend? At Dorkfest2006, this movie was a featured attraction. That's what they get for naming me head dork for the third year in a row. :)

Being Dr. Evilovich

beachbum — Wed, 24 May 2006 17:37:54 GMT

My Dad used to say, "If only I had the capacity to be an asshole, we would be a lot wealthier." Today, with only minor douchebaggery, and nothing outside the friendly confines of what would be the job description of a sportswriter, I could have catapaulted my little baseball site into National prominence. I never even considered it because it would have come at the expense of several people I know to be decent people. For just being stupid kids, or being nice to stupid kids. I know someone else will employ the basic neccessity level of douchebaggery and cause these hardships for these people someday anyway. Maybe different ones...but it will happen. It's only a matter of time. And my doing it now would not really change anything except maybe who profited by it and who was hurt. But I just can't. I can't possibly feel good about, let alone pursue actively, success at the expense of others. I won't employ douchebaggery to hurt others in order to "reach my financial potential". We live in a world were the mindset is so disturbingly like that of Dr. Evil. How can people possibly live a life where they value their own financial gain more than they have concern for the effects of their actions on others?

There's both love and money...

beachbum — Tue, 23 May 2006 19:21:44 GMT

Great quote from an obscure Joe Jackson song (Wild West...as opposed to the wildly popular and well known Joe Jackson songs. ) "In the land of the free and the not so often brave, there's both love and money, you choose which you will save." Sweet. :)

God Give Me Strength

beachbum — Mon, 22 May 2006 13:59:00 GMT

Yeah, I realize admitting it's a decade long dream to recognizably play a Burt Bacharach/Elvis Costello song makes me a dork, first order of magnitude. However, I love "God Give Me Strength". Always thought that if some day I could play/sing it, it would be indicative of being an actual piano player. :) http://www.nyfuturestars.com/ed/media/godgivemestrength.mp3 Yay me. :)

Trusting Your Intuition

beachbum — Mon, 22 May 2006 11:13:43 GMT

I believe that intuition is a sense...a physiological doodad. Yet, I continue to not fully trust that sense. How many times does it have to prove itself before it gets the respect sight, hearing, taste, touch, and smell get? Intuition even gets similed to the other senses all the time: Something doesn't feel right, it smells fishy, it looks suspicious...as if attributing the sensation to a "real" sense makes it more viable. I have been deceived by all my other senses, yet I believe them unfailingly. Trust the force, Luke. :)

6 of one, half a dozen of the other...

beachbum — Sat, 20 May 2006 18:33:32 GMT

"Yin to the yang, there just must be." - Big Will You know the same thing that keeps me from being a good photographer, is responsible for every good photo I take. If I go to an event, I like to watch. I like to feel it. Take part in the energy. Sometimes, I'm doing that, and I miss "The Shot." However, every good photo I take, I feel, is because I "see it", instead of just taking photos of an event. To my eye, there is such an ENORMOUS difference in a photo when the photographer is truly captivated by what he/she is shooting, and the subject of the photo is lost in their passion for what they are doing and not posed. You do stuff like shoot Orientalia last night, and I don't understand how you can not get caught up in the energy and the feeling of people who are doing something they are really passionate about. Last night, the 100 best photos, all seemed to happen to the naked eye for me, instead of through the lens. But, I feel much better prepared to shoot next time. :)

Crawling Through The Sewer

beachbum — Fri, 12 May 2006 16:00:44 GMT

You know, one of my favorite movie metaphors is Andy Dufresne in Shawshank Redemption, opining that one must "Get busy livin', or get busy dyin'." and then crawling through a sewer tunnel to escape to live in peaceful happiness at the beach. I relate to that. I relate to that character in a fundamental way. Despite repeatedly being falsely accused, and abused, and having the bulk of his adult life taken from him, Andy helps everyone around him become better people, even people he doesn't know, he extends himself for. And, despite the constant lack of appreciation for his kindness and goodness, Andy perseveres, remains true to his values, and finally reaches a place where he finds happiness in living at the beach and doing something he loves that makes him happy. That rocks.

Very Intuitious

beachbum — Thu, 11 May 2006 14:13:11 GMT

I guess if one who believes in superstition in superstitious, than those who believe in intuition are intuitious. I came across this definition of intuition last night while reading, "Intuition: "An intuition is a sense or awareness of some particular energy or situation or entity, without sense or knowledge as would account for that awareness." but, see, I believe that intuition IS a sense. That it's a biological function. That like sight or smell or taste, or touch or hearing - it's a sense that some people are just naturally more gifted at, some people have worked hard to refine, and some people take for granted. And, I believe it is based on an accumulation of sensory data, AND knowledge AND energy/vibe. A dark alley in a bad neighborhood sets off your spidey sense...because you see it's dark, and you have the knowledge of the neighborhood...AND you get that funky, funky, feeling. Ya know? I often think that my desire to do and experience and dabble in a thousand things keeps me from ever really focusing on one discipline long enough to really kick butt at it. I could spend years learning what has been learned by others before me, and/or discovering new things that others that come after me can then learn, and to what end? It's maddening really to have such a short life, and to have a brain that requires chasing 1000 dreams - each of which has a 20-30 year window to truly master - in order to be happy and fulfilled. They say ignorrance is bliss, however, I voted for single-minded focus...that'd be bliss...for a couple of hours until I wanted to do something else, anyway. :) Side thought: I don't understand why psychics always have a sign outside that says "call for appointment." Shouldn't it just say, "Yes Bob, Wednesday at 3 is fine."?

Being A Dream Facilitator

beachbum — Wed, 10 May 2006 16:54:33 GMT

When I meet people and they ask what I do, I say, "I'm a dream facilitator." which always draws a weird expression and a conversation. Invariably, I ask, "If you could do whatever makes you really happy and no matter how silly it seems to you right now, you could make enough money doing just that to live comfortably...what would you do?" It amazes me how few people have an answer to that, and how often the answer is something like, "I dunno...I like cheese." But, it also always leads to a person speaking animatedly and passionately about something they really care about, even if it's just the machinations behind the scenes of this season's American Idol. There is nothing more captivating than watching and listening to someone who is really passionate about something, tell you all about it. Even if the it in question is relatively mundane. Big Will opines: "You know I go psycho when my new joint hits...just can't sit...gotta get jiggy wif' it, yeah...tha's it!" and I read that as people go nuts when they are really passionate about something...and it's purty coolio when they do. :)

Breathing Kills

beachbum — Wed, 10 May 2006 16:22:48 GMT

After exhaustive study, I can't find a single case of someone who breathed their whole lives, and didn't die. It's insidius...breathing...it seems like a natural body function, but everyone who does it eventually dies. Do you ever see a public service announcement about that? Huh? It's like they're trying to hide it from us, but all along it's been there...right in front of our noses.

Gender Defender

beachbum — Fri, 05 May 2006 15:26:33 GMT

Last night, at the Bru's I stopped to catch the end of the Mets game on the way home and I was accosted in the following manner. A young lady who bore many of the physical attributes society usually associates with being "attractive" sat next to me, exchanged pleasantries, and proceeded to - as unattractively as humanly possible - prove to be the most bitter, cynical, uneducated, closed minded, materialistic, biggoted, nasty, negative, just flat out mean personification of the holy-boca-bitch stereotype in the history of western civilization. Not to me, mind you, she was trying to be nice to me. But her energy and just the way she talked about things in general conversation were just about the ugliest things I've seen a long time. I disengaged myself, and moments later this: Drunk Guy: Dude. She wants you. Ed: Sadly...that's not a particularly mutual coveting. Drunk Guy: She's so hot. Ed: I thought....not so much. She seemed...undesirable? Drunk Guy: What are you, a faggot? Mutual coveting? Fag. :sigh: It's difficult to not appreciate the general disdain women seem to have for men sometimes. There is no point in trying to talk to that guy about wanting to spend your time with bright, caring, compassionate, creative people; or having a sense or feeling or intuition that someone is good or bad or positive or negative or whatever; or that the big "get laid" scoreboard in the sky isn't your metric for measuring your self worth. Anymore than you could discuss why you work for passion not money. Or why you spend $20 on 2 Coronas and tip, instead of buying the pitcher of Miller Lite that's on special for $3.50. We are indefensible.

Things I Would Do Differently

beachbum — Mon, 01 May 2006 01:03:10 GMT

I dunno much about bellydancing show logistics...but if it was me, I'd get rid of all the chairs in front of the stage, and get a halfway decent club dj and have him mix the music so it ran smoothly and without breaks from one troupe to another and encourage the audience to stand and dance in front of the stage. Like a dance club. If you're at that show, you love to dance, and you want to be standing and grooving in the pit...not sitting in a chair. :) Just my two cents.

Luckiest Boy In The World

beachbum — Sat, 29 Apr 2006 15:21:35 GMT

Here's me...all happy. Yesterday, I got to shoot photos at a seminar by noted wellness expert Dr. Weil. I'm a lucky bastard. I'm not even a trained photographer. I get these opportunities...like Dr. Weil yesterday or any number of big sports moments or whatever...it must seem extraordinarily unfair to actual photographers, who work for like 10 years and do a bar mitzvah every weekend or the studio portraits at Walmart or something, and I get Mike Piazza and Pedro and Dr. Weil. That happened when I was a musician too. Guys who were better than me and had worked harder than me, played at a wedding, while I jammed with guys like the Spyro guys and whatnot at the China Club. So, I know family and friends are all concerned about some of the blows the world deals me, and my perceived naiveity and my hippiedippie nature and the peril that combination sometimes puts me in, however...truly...I am the luckiest boy in the world. Or at least I feel like I am, so even if I'm not...aren't I? :)

You want me to freak this?

beachbum — Sat, 29 Apr 2006 14:50:48 GMT

I used to think Dr. Weil was a bit of a freak. He may be still, however, yesterday via working with Dr. Nancy I had a chance to hear him speak and read his stuff. The guy is doing everything humanly possible to change the world of healthcare from being profit motivated to patient wellness motivated. He is donating all profits from the sale of his products to a foundation that gives out grants to do just that. His money is where his mouth is. Cool.

Taking the high road.

beachbum — Wed, 26 Apr 2006 16:43:39 GMT

"When the smoke clears, after life's roller coasters, see who stands puttin' his mic into his holster." - Big Will It is a satisfying feeling to have taken the high-road and refused to lower yourself to the lowest common denominator, and to have that be in the end what is remembered, even when the original conflict has long been forgotten.

"With Great Power, Comes Great Responsibility." -Spiderman

beachbum — Tue, 25 Apr 2006 16:29:09 GMT

From The Stylings of Big Will: "Sure, you're free to do it, But what's it mean to do it? Did you mean to do it? Did you need to do it? Did you take time to think about the seeds you'd ruin?" Certainly, America provides us with the freedom to say whatever we want...however, that power comes with the inherent responsibility to choose those words carefully. - Ed :)

Quick Jam From Waldo

beachbum — Sun, 23 Apr 2006 23:14:22 GMT

"You will always find those who think they know what is your duty better than you know it. It is easy in the world to live after the world's opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after our own; but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude." - RW Emerson

The Coffee Ritual

beachbum — Fri, 21 Apr 2006 16:16:09 GMT

Almost every morning - circumstances allowing - I have my coffee at this spot on the beach. It's serene, and beautiful and lets me get my head in order for the day. I walk a mile or two, absorb some sun, run through my day and my dreams in my head, and come back energized and ready to face the challenges of the day. All hail the ritual. :)

Edificational Mumbojumbo

beachbum — Fri, 21 Apr 2006 01:49:26 GMT

Trust your intuition. Believe that there is a reason that something or someone compells you, or inspires you, or captivates you. Believing and pursuing that intuition is the highest possible enlightenment.

Chasing Your Dreams

beachbum — Thu, 20 Apr 2006 14:14:11 GMT

Today's jiggyness is from the book of the Willenium: In the book of the Willenium, Jiggyjovah says: "Yo, something in your way? Go through it. Pretend you got a swoosh on ya baby...Just do it." Or, as Ralph Waldo says, "There is a time in every man's education when he arrives at the conviction that envy is ignorance; that imitation is suicide; that he must take himself for better, for worse, as his portion; that though the wide universe is full of good, no kernel of nourishing corn can come to him but through his toil bestowed on that plot of ground which is given to him to till." Or, succienctly: Play your best jam with the skillz you got. Because that's all you got, and nothing comes to you that doesn't grow from making the most out of - and putting your best effort into - that which is inherently within you. Can you feel me? I can feel you. ;)