Blahg, blahg, blahg...

R.I.P., little one

belisama — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 05:46:20 GMT

I lost one of the tiniest things dear to my heart today. Her name was Topaz. She was almost two years old. She was wonderfully amusing (often slept on her back), and a total snack-hound. I miss her.

Mooooo... (baaah)... mooooo...

belisama — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 14:54:15 GMT

greeneyedsunny@yahoo.com Facebook- Shan Tastic That's where I'll be.

SNOW in SOCAL!

belisama — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 16:41:35 GMT

We got some overnight! Very exciting, made for a fun drive to the bus stop this morning. That storm moving in from over the ocean (see it in the photo?) is gonna melt it all, though... :(

Take Care of the Golf Balls

belisama — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 19:04:02 GMT

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day don't seem to be enough, remember to 'Take Care of the Golf Balls'... A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was. The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous 'yes.' The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed. 'Now,' said the professor as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things---your family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favorite passions---and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.' He went on. 'The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car. The sand is everything else---the small stuff.' 'If you put the sand into the jar first,' he continued, 'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Spend time with your children, with your parents. Visit with grandparents. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your spouse out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first---the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.' One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled and said, 'I'm glad you asked. The coffee just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.' Please share this with someone you care about. I JUST DID

Now I've seen everything...

belisama — Fri, 11 Jan 2008 00:58:48 GMT

Ok, yeah, I know I haven't *really* seen EVERYTHING, but I'm a little closer to it now than I was a few days ago... So, we're driving home after school Tuesday, heading up our mountain road, nothing unusual, when I get a "feeling" from D-1, who is in the front passenger seat. I look over at her, and she says, "Back there... like... up there... there was... like... this thing... animal... with horns... like... a bull!" (Whew!) I said, "What? Really?" I mean, we live in the mountains. With mountain terrain, and trees, and stuff. So I backed up the car. Holy crap. Sure enough, on someone's property, which at that point goes fairly steeply up from the road, was a bull. With very large horns. About 50 feet away. But he wasn't moving. I said, "Is he real?" D-1 said, "Of course he is." I said, "But he's not moving." D-2 said, "I think he's moving..." I said, "It doesn't look like he's moving. Maybe he's fake, and someone just put him there for fun." (Like something *I* would do :) Then he wiggled an ear. And turned his head. Oh, yeah, he's very real. D-1 said, "Let's go, before he charges the car!" I said, "He's not going to charge the car." She said, "He might..." I said, "Yeah, he might, but our horses are faster that his bull!" We stayed long enough for me to get one snapshot with my phone. We looked for him yesterday, but didn't see him. We looked for him again today. Nope. I said to the girls, "Maybe he was some kind of mystical creature." D-1 said, "No, mom, it was a bull." Spoilsport. :P

Tired of life...

belisama — Thu, 03 Jan 2008 07:13:42 GMT

OK, not all of it, just this section of it. Though I am closer than ever to being back in my own space (and am, really), there is still sooo much that needs to be done immediately. I have spent the majority of the past two weeks going through EVERYTHING I've had at my mom's, doing one of four things with it: packing to take home, packing to go to storage, packing it to go to goodwill, or throwing it in the garbage. I am so happy to finally have a "home" to call my own again, but it also means settling things out elsewhere. But so be it. I am so exhausted, but I'm looking forward to some awesome escape moments in the next 24 hours. Starting with lunch tomorrow with a beautiful woman.

Bobcats and Cougars and Bears... Oh My !!!

belisama — Thu, 06 Dec 2007 10:13:57 GMT

I've seen a number of bobcats, the occasional adult cougar (probably the same one), and a few cougar cubs (so cute!). So now I finally got to see a bear for the first time... THREE of them! A mamma and two cubs. I was driving down the road (outside the gate, for those that will know) when I came around a bend, and there they were! All I could see of the mamma was her (huge) backside and legs as she was already diving into the brush, but the cubs (about the size of an average golden retriever) were content to sit in obliviousland while they continued with whatever game they were playing. I'm sure mamma was verbally reprimanding them to GET-YOUR-ASSES-OFF-THE-ROAD-IMMEDIATELY-OR-YOU-BOTH-ARE-GOING-TO-BE-GROUNDED!!! But I wasn't going to roll down my window and try to hear what she had to say. Eventually, just as the others do, they left. Don't they know I just want to pet them, scratch them behind the ears, feel their soft fur? But they keep moving on. Do I smell bad? {Sigh}

I'm still here... {waves}

belisama — Thu, 06 Dec 2007 09:53:31 GMT

I have not done another disappearing act. I am merely confined to (gasp) dial-up, and not just any ol' dial-up, mind you, but THE-FUCKING-GAWDDAMNED-SLOOOOWEST-DIAL-UP-YOU-COULD-IMAGINE! My iPhone is faster, but I can't read it cuz my eyes are involuntarily boycotting teeny tiny print... And I have no television. Which in and of itself is ok. But when you have no tv AND no real internet, it's a real test. I mean, treat. Yeah, it's a real treat. Test. :)P I DO have electricity and phone (to run the shitty dial-up), I have a working septic system, but I am lacking actual running water. Big Effffenn surprise. So for this we revert to an old time system... uh... how you call it? Oh, yes, the bucket brigade. Carry the buckets in, dump them (ONLY) where they need to be, carry the buckets back out... This is the kind of thing strapping boys are good for. Well, one of the things... Must gets me a few o' them boys... yarr... So? Who wants to come over? Pretty Please? With whipped cream on top? On bottom? Shan xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

It's interesting what a google search will turn up...

belisama — Sat, 10 Nov 2007 08:04:29 GMT

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=shantastic I had no idea. I'd like to think that they all apply to me, but I can only attest to the second definition.

Right now...

belisama — Fri, 26 Oct 2007 06:18:15 GMT

I am on my own property, with no electricity or water, sleeping in my 1951 Spartan trailer for the night. I feel so peaceful and at home, I cannot possibly convey it. And I am tribing from my iPhone!

Uh, Happy Anniversary?

belisama — Sat, 13 Oct 2007 03:50:36 GMT

One year ago today, Barbara attempted to take me off the face of the planet. Though I am still not in as good of shape as I was one year ago *yesterday*, I am not dead. One year of pain and discomfort later, I am still grateful as hell to be here to bitch about it. Thank you to those who have listened with patience. It has been, and continues to be, a slow road, but, hey, I've got the rest of my life ahead of me, right? Thanks for your love and support. XOXOXOXO Shan P.S. I know I have been promising pictures for a very long time. Here they are, finally. :) http://people.tribe.net/belisama/photos

I Got Tagged!

belisama — Fri, 23 Jun 2006 20:20:55 GMT

I think everyone knows this game by now, but if not, here are the rules... If you've been tagged, you must write a blog entry with 8 somewhat unknown factoids/interesting things/habits about yourself and STATE who tagged you! Then choose 6 new people to be tagged and list their names. No tag backs. ~~~~~~~~ So, I was tagged by... Suzannarama! That stinker! Alright, eight things... eight things... unknown... hmmm... interesting... habits (?)... hmmm... eight things... 1. Right now, as I type this, I am sitting here with a deer mouse in my pocket (don't worry, I'm also happy to see you). She was one of two pinks that we found in Ojai, and, yes, syringe fed. Unfortunately, the other one didn't make it. I am not a mouse person, I am a rat person. She's pretty cute, though. 2. I like country music. 3. I don't believe that blood is thicker than water. Because of this, I don't speak to half of my relatives. Well, almost half. Nine out of twenty-three, including me (yes, I still talk to myself). I don't have time for idiotic, self-centered, self-pitying people. My friends are far more worthy of being in my life than those nine relatives. 4. If I could have ANY job I wanted, right now, it would be a Formula One race car driver. C'mon, driving real fast and touring the world- it's a no-brainer. And no getting dizzy with the constant left-hand turns! 5. When I was a little kid, I used to cry when other kids broke my crayons. 6. I am not a Democrat. 7. My favorite TV show is Rescue Me. It's crude, rude, and socially unacceptable. I love it! Tuesdays at 10 P.M. (PST) on FX. 8. I like to go rattlesnake searching when I hear them rattling in the grass. Don't worry, I wear my snake boots. But the little suckers just keep slithering away. Don't they understand I just want to LOOK at them?? Ok, your turn. I tag... ChristianC Margaret ∆Dexy Dork Moon Bunny Joey Dynamite Jennuwin (At least, I think these people will be the least pissy with me for pickin' 'em!) Have fun!

Girl Power!

belisama — Tue, 25 Apr 2006 06:07:44 GMT

GINGER ROGERS DID EVERYTHING FRED ASTAIRE DID, BUT SHE DID IT BACKWARDS AND IN HIGH HEELS.

Something to Share...

belisama — Thu, 15 Dec 2005 05:08:52 GMT

I have carried this with me the past 11 years... "Love is a state in which one lives who loves, and whoever loves has given himself away; love then, and not marriage, is belonging. Marriage is a public declaration of a man and a woman that they have formed a secret alliance, with the intention to belong to, and share with each other, a mystical estate; mystical exactly in the sense that the real experience cannot be communicated to others, nor explained even to oneself on rational grounds." (Katherine Ann Porter, Marriage is Belonging) It goes beyond being in love, being inseparable, being best friends. It's about being the ultimate of friends. It's about understanding that, if you try to change the person you are with, then they are no longer the person you chose in the first place. It's about each of you accepting the responsibilities you are stronger at. It's about backing each other up, that's what allies do. It's about letting each other grow, evolve, and experience. And being there when the experience is, occasionally, not pleasant. It's about realizing that you have no control over each other. It's about accepting that, hey, this is life, and, really, there are no guarantees. You can't keep someone from walking out the door. It's about trust. Ultimately, trust is greater than love. Think about it. You can have the trust without the love, but can you have the love without the trust?

Stolen from Rich...

belisama — Fri, 02 Dec 2005 06:48:45 GMT

OK, those who know me well know that I am not a fan of Burning Week, but this thread is fricken hysterical! http://bm.tribe.net/thread/d5a52d83-23f9-4197-bf21-f9a449de7637 (Thanks, Rich!)

THIS JUST IN...

belisama — Thu, 24 Nov 2005 20:35:42 GMT

Scientists have proven that "Life" is a sexually transmitted terminal illness.

This could get me into a lot of trouble...

belisama — Mon, 21 Nov 2005 05:03:14 GMT

The Dirty Little Secret Deliberate Gentle Sex Master (DGSMf) Innocent but fundamentally sexual, like the word "finger". You are the Dirty Little Secret. Few women have the confidence for sex mastery, and among nice girls, like you, it's almost unheard of. So congratulations. You've had plenty of adventures, but you've remained a kind, thoughtful person. Your friends appreciate your exploits. They even live vicariously through you. You seek pleasure, but you're not irresponsible. You are organized and cautious, and you choose your lovers wisely. One, you don't like dirtbags. And two, you like to maintain control. Or at least lose it selectively. You might notice that older men single you out. They have an eye for your sensual nature. Take it as a compliment. You enjoy making people happy, and it's inevitable that many girls will fall harder for you than you for them. You're not completely comfortable in a serious, long-term relationship right now. Our guess is that the key to extended happiness will be finding a responsible, but kinky, mate. http://www.okcupid.com/oktest3 http://www.okcupid.com/glossary

Thought for the day...

belisama — Fri, 18 Nov 2005 06:45:50 GMT

In the beginning, the Lord created chocolate, and he saw that it was good. Then he separated the light from the dark, and it was better. That's as religious as it gets, folks.