A Holy Land
A phantom prayer softly exits broken and delayed, pours from the minaret like cold milk from a perspiring pitcher
Eastward winds blow gently carrying the prayer over barren dune and cracked ancient riverbed all the way to the Mother of all villages
I stand on the sands of a thousand houses ground to dust by the countless footsteps of men long dead
I send my prayer westward across the sea, statically shimmering, spasming in chaotic patterns, slapping indifferently against the shore
I feel my pulse subtlety vibrate within me. It beats a rhythm that fills the gaps between the careless blows of the sea
I dig my toes into the sand as if to take hold on the earth as it slides beneath me
The last sliver of sun is devoured by the horizon and darkness pounces on the swelling waters
Beneath sparsely spaced and distant stars and the brown-orange light pollution, spidering out like an infection
I am almost thankful for this mess that we have made.

A Letter to Walt Whitman
I find your name engraved on my history
Between us a chain of tobacco smoke, plague, and broken promises
What have you to say now for fraternity, for democracy, for the ideal man?
You are nothing more than a blabbering, idealist pederast rotting in his grave
Do tell Mr. Whitman, did you rise to the Elysian fields of antiquity free of age, of bias, of women?
I pray that the closet is the womb of my being as it is the tomb of yours
When a tall, muscular, Aryan deity calls forth the names of great lovers of men from behind his pale beard
He shouts "HECTOR ARISTOTLE DI VINCI MICHAELANGELO WHITMAN"
I will lie in the bowels of my forgotten mother
She writhes and groans for her blackness
There is no list of her children's names
There is but earth and stone where once was flesh and bone
There I will rest to be devoured by worms
While rows of marble busts remind us of the great achievements of the lovers of men the maggots will not ask my name nor ponder my perversions as they feast upon my former matter

Istambul
Nobel beast rising from the shattered lip of the Bosporus. Your slumber hides your rage and broken past.

Masses of corridors, alleys and catacombs bisect the earth knotting a labyrinth of structure

I stand in awe; unable to differentiate the work of man from that of God

O Constantine, now I know thy sorrow- for she left you with no remorse taking the hand of another man and going with him

He called out triumphantly "I stand in your city and she willingly receives me"

I bend to the gutter, a collage of refuse decorating earth and dancing into sea, tumbling down like the walls of Constantine, like the forgotten idols of Darius

O Istanbul, you are the organ from which great nations make coitus in war

Your glorious flesh scarred and ornamented by palaces and hovels, hearths and graves. They give testament to your insatiable appetite for the hearts of men

Alas, still jealous time beats down upon you, yet you bloom like a lotus in gentile spring rain

O Constantine, O Constantine, now I truly know thy pain....


Earth Attributes
Lizard scatters sand as it flees the bending shade
Its little heart rapidly pumps as it holds its breath holds itself high off the ground, stretching little gray ligaments until they almost snap
By night the lizard will be cold and still, hidden yearning for the break of dawn
Big grandmother says the lizard is a shaman, but father says he is a coward
******
Cloud rises behind the mountain to dissolve in the sky above
I ask: "Cloud, do you hide my ancestors behind you? Do you veil the face of God?"
Several visions form and slowly shatter to reveal a shallow blue nothingness
******
Stars, shining milk of my mother, sparkling seed of my father. Guide me to abundance's light in times of the deepest pitch darkness
Mut, Manat, Wrected Hag-Scribe
Have you painted my fate well upon the heavens or have you sliced it to ribbons on the floors of Sheol?
Grandmother midwife turned virgin funerary mourner
From the dusk to the dawn
O Stars of the skies lead me to my origin before the black one who holds you lays me in my grave.
*******
Great Sea, at dusk I watched you apathetically clapping against the fallen walls of Apolonia
Have you no respect for people?
You are the mother of all life
Yet you are the beast that devours her own young
********
Desert
I have seen the skeleton of glory protruding from the sands
exposed by sparse breezes only to be hidden again by endless dust invading every cavity exiting every orifice
I met a man who had written his history in the sand with the countless footsteps of a lifetime
and the wind erased it behind him.....


3 Years
3 years i have wandered sun-beaten streets
The sun... he was a golden ring eclipsed by the void within me
So I woke only in the nights to comb the streets like the head of a vain lover whose moist hair reflects the light of a crescent moon
3 years I was hungry and sniffing out the right release to free me from my hollow wet bones
Searching for a pure heart
maybe hidden behind smokey curtains or sunken beneath liquid filth
I have drank of this liquid filth and it was so sweet
I made with it wine and licked it from my own two bare feet
collected it like mana from the cold grey street
To awaken with my belly full and my every hole gaping
sucking up all the air until the walls cave in
3 years I frolicked with the street cats clamoring with my lallie tats
up a rhythm that shook the ground beneath me and leveled mountains within me
I found barren cemetery in the garden of Eden
There I took the earth from my ancestor's graves and wondered how to be free
3 years I wept from three eyes looking upward begging for an answer, struggling to close at the sight of a horrendous deed
I looked straight into the flawless face of the of the morning star as he plummeted downward
and landed in a flaming burst and he penetrated deep inside me, sent me to my roots
to a place that burns hotter than hell and brighter than 11 suns
I saw not myself, I knew not of others, I felt the love of 3 ancient mothers
3 years I mourned until my tears called the rains down upon me
even in the air i was unable to escape from the broad and rumbling river that divided the earth before my very eyes, its horrid roar muting all my desperate cries
And then the sun rose bright after witches' Sabbath
and he shone glorious on 3 beautiful florentine faces facing westward toward the sea
perhaps i am mistaken but one was looking straight at me
3 years i was horny for the truth, smelling it out like sex; eating my words, staking them in towers behind every yellow tooth
Alas hath my tears baptised me; gifted with the Torah of Sodom
written across the fist of a jealous lover; a proud yet lowly homme
My actions were as flames forging a silver gate that opens
broad and sturdy, waits to welcome me home

The Truth Passes Before Me
dishonour thrown at me like stones, piled before me, have formed a stairway that elevates me skyward.
snide remarks cast at me like arrows have decorated me like crystal shards.
my flaws ornament me like thousands of flowers on an idol of the divine god-head
the fire you spit reaches me as a warm breeze, caught in my robes, carries me to heaven where I am bathed in the glory of our mutual perfection.
your hateful blows have carved my being like a chisel upon hard marble. You have made me masterpiece.
I thank you for fulfilling your role it is, like all things, a blessing
for the truth passes before me and i follow it blindly.
i whisper it to myself like a nameless song written before my birth.
As you held me down with choking hands and conquering cock, i have sprouted roots that have tied me to the earth,
I have blossomed to be caressed by the heavens.
obstacles lain before me are as the teeth in god's smile, that chew me in his mighty mouth, hammering me to his tongue like an anvil, forging me into a great bronze mirror that reflects the sun as a beacon to peace
your jealousy has humbled me and draws me to the ground where the truth passes before me
you have wronged me and it has taught me forgiveness.
you have cast me out and thus I have found family.
you have lied to me and thus I am able to recognize my truth as it passes before me
I thank you for your dishonour, your snide remarks
I thank you for the fire you spit, for your hateful blows
I thank you for your choking hands and conquering cock
I thank you for the obstacles you have lain before me
I thank you for your jealousy, it humbles me
I thank you, you have wronged me and I have been blessed
I thank you, you have cast me out and I have been embraced
I thank you as the truth passes before me for you have carried it
It is your gift to me and I am in debt to you eternally
You have murdered me and thus I am born again
You have raped me and thus I have given birth to myself
It is because of you that I have become
As you push me away, your action makes us one
I thank you for the truth you have given me, it is as all things, a blessing

The Strong Oak
The mighty leviathan that blooms from humble seed,
waits still and patient for the day it will eventually be freed
From the expendable shell that it well knew cloaked by winter's sleet and graced by summers dew
What is blessed by spring and born a new
one day raped bare and red by fall's hand
A mighty oak so tall and strong will stand
Concealing feeble root's clinging desperate to fine sand


Stand strong like the oak, and you shall know as the day becomes darkness if ever so slow
so will come justice for those who cheat and each of the three croans shall he ultimately meet

Only to the future this wretched world spins and only to an end will the 3 croans send
he who hath no value for lover, brother nor friend the pain will swell and its borders will know no end
for he who hath drawn blood in vain, his wounds will never mend

Know he that stands tall like the oak can conceal a rotting core nearing to be hollow
Know he that spits so much fire that he will never swallow
It's is your will that the pure at heart will never follow

For once I found a mighty oak had taken me by the hand
My love I wrote with secret letters beneath him in the sand

I spun it into gilded chains and hung them all around him
I translated for him my secret tongue but it's meaning never found him

Alas, the thoughts I never did tell behind a broken heart did swell
And as the wise woman's cards did spell, this called up the devil from deep within in hell

I asked, "hast thou no shame"
for a thousand times i have seen the devil but now I know his name
he is the taker, the sadist, the big money maker
the seducer, the wanter, the giddy forsaker

So when death comes to wait by my side, from him I will not run to hide
For I have known well what all do fear, dare not it's name be spoken here
So bury me in a casket of oak, for I am wrapped in his mark like a heavy cloak

Know you, who stands tall and strong
you were my muse all along
you were the street cats with which i frolicked
yours was the sacred seed from which my guts coliced
you were the flawless morning star
the heavy gaze upon me from a far

Yours was the love that shook my soul from my bones singing out like 3 old croans
shaking me like a flea from the sheets erasing all my past defeats
So you could cast me on the ground sniffing out your fuck like a hungry hound
knowing it may never be found

Is this, my oak, what makes you so strong? to know that what you cast out will never belong
you know that I have done you no wrong
and I pray thee that the truth you will see, for what's devoid of love will never be free
for even the great oak will grow grey and brittle, broken to twigs for the devil to widdle

But bury me in a casket of oak, for you mark is wrapped around me like a heavy cloak
and my chains you wear over your hidden heart will bind us more to never part


I ask again, "hast thou no shame"- To entertain the devil and speak out his name
as if it were a child's game- you refuse the purest love and sell it out for blame

I've known the love of a hundred men, passing once or twice but never again
But you were the prize I yearned to win, to save me from my hidden sin

You told me once you'd never let me go, please tell me now that it is still so
for a stone falls here or there and wavers not to and fro
I pray now that you the truth will know, it was for your truth that I loved you so

So get you hastily and lock the gate but know that my love can swallow your hate