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I am a Jesuit missionary in Uruguay. It is a good job to have, and a good place to study ERGOT, which is something I am interested in (as, truly, all of us should be). I am study poisons and toxins, and can compound over 75 local poisons and psychotropic agents, all derived from ERGOT and something of which I assume you have never heard, called BAGUS, which is a fungus found locally. It is like ERGOT, but considerably more powerful. The Catholic Church sent me here to study this fungus in particular, being as I am a Jesuit and all, which gives me a certain expertise in BOTANY. I like to make friends, which is something I would readily point out to all who read my profile. Oh, I should also point out that this fungus BAGUS has a strange effect: it causes people to dance naked. It is kind of like . . . one of those medieval dancing maladies . . . anyway, this is true.