Can I have a kiss?

hahahahaha This is soooo true!

butterfly_tongues — Tue, 02 Oct 2007 23:23:18 GMT

A first grade teacher explains to her class that she is an Alabama fan. She asks her students to raise their hands if they are Alabama fans too. Not really knowing what an Alabama fan was, but wanting to be liked by their teacher, their hands fly into the air. There is, however, one exception. Susie has not gone along with the crowd. The teacher asks her why she has decided to be different. "Because I'm not an Alabama fan" she reports. "Then," asks the teacher, "what are you?" "I'm a LSU Tiger fan" boasts the little girl. The teacher asks Susie why she is a LSU fan. "Well, my Dad and Mom are Tiger fans, so I'm a Tiger fan too" she responds. "That's no reason," the teacher says. "What if your mom was a moron, and your dad was an idiot. "What would you be then?" the teacher asks.. Susie smiles and says, "Then I'd be an Alabama fan." Now.. this joke is amazing. Truly amazing, but my heart does not lay with LSU... it is with Tennessee Vols. BUT! I *do* hate Bama... Soooo I just wanted to state that one little fact. :P Clear the air. this joke.. is still the shit. ahahahaahahahhaahhahahahahahahaha

Yay!

butterfly_tongues — Tue, 02 Oct 2007 22:00:02 GMT

I won Homecoming Maid for the college I attend! Yay for me! So... my boss is going out of town for 10 days. While she is gone I am to take her place.... I'm a little stressed out about this. Not only do I have to now have all my filing done before the end of October, I have to do hers as well each day. Plus anything else the dean of students decideds to make a duty of mine. He looked at me today and said, "Staci, for the next two weeks I'm going to treat you like you're Sherrie. Are you going to be able to handle that? You will have all the responsiblity that she has... even over the other student workers." I put on a brave face and told him that I could handle whatever he gave me, and that as long as he told me what needed to be done, I would get it done. However, I'm scared shitless of this.. I know it is only two weeks, but damn. I have to do all the payroll, handle all the hours, the calendar (and that is a HELL of a lot more than it sounds), get all my filing done on time (which is a SHIT load), continue with my regular everyday duties, my Homecoming duties, my school work, the Dean's duties, and anything else at all that is asked of me. I'm really scared that I won't be able to handle it all. I suppose I'm just looking for a small pep talk here. heh... I know once it comes down to it I'll bust my ass inorder to get it all done. I won't allow myself to let so many people down, but... I'm still stressed like hell.

Interesting how a song could fit me so well...

butterfly_tongues — Fri, 21 Sep 2007 16:36:16 GMT

I’m strong But I break I’m stubborn And I make plenty of mistakes Yeah I’m hard And life with me is never easy To figure out, to love I’m jaded but oh so lovely All you have to do is hold me And you’ll know and you’ll see just how sweet it can be If you’ll trust me, love me, let me Maybe, maybe Someday When we’re at the same place When we’re on the same road When it’s okay to hold my hand Without feeling lost Without all the excuses When it’s just because you love me, you let me, you need me Then maybe, maybe All you have to do is hold me And you’ll know and you’ll see just how sweet it can be If you’ll trust me, love me, let me Maybe, maybe I'M CONFUSING AS HELL I’m north and south And I’ll probably never have it all figured out But what I know is I wasn’t meant to walk this world without you And I promise I’ll try Yeah I’m gonna try to give you every little part of me Every single detail you missed with your eyes Then maybe Maybe, yeah maybe One day We’ll meet again and you’ll need me, you’ll see me completely Every little bit Oh yeah maybe you’ll love me, you’ll love me then I don’t want to be tough And I don’t want to be proud I don’t need to be fixed and I certainly don’t need to be found I’m not lost I need to be loved I just need to be loved I just want to be loved by you and I won’t stop ‘cause I believe That maybe, yeah maybe Maybe, yeah maybe I should know better than to touch the fire twice But I’m thinking maybe, yeah maybe you might Maybe, love maybe

:D

butterfly_tongues — Thu, 20 Sep 2007 17:30:07 GMT

This made me happy... so I had to share. hehe

I'M THE SHIT!

butterfly_tongues — Wed, 19 Sep 2007 20:49:39 GMT

Soo I'm in college, as most of you know, and this semester is extremely taxing on me for some reason. Anyway, I had a Biology exam today... and I was kinda worried about it. I was scared that I wouldn't do so well. When I got to the class I looked at the test, took it within 15 minutes, gave it to the teacher, and she looked at me puzzled. She said "are you sure you want me to grade this? This was a hard test." I just smiled and said, "yes ma'am." She graded it.. I GOT A 100!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ...I... am the shit. I am the poo and all you mother fuckers need to take a big whiff! hahaha She looked at me stunned. :D I love feeling oh so smart.

The wonders of being a secretary

butterfly_tongues — Fri, 07 Sep 2007 19:10:33 GMT

I've been sitting at this desk, filing, answering the phone, answering questions, and so on since 8 this morning. It is 1:53 pm and I'm about to go insane. I love my job, don't get me wrong, but on fridays... I get so stir crazy! I just want to jump up and do a stupid little dance and say "FUCK OFF DEEEEEEEEEEAN! I'M GOING HOME TO HAVE FUUUUUUUUUUUUN!" lol I would never do that. lol but it is nice to think it. :P I would post you guys a picture... but it seems that my computer does not like to upload Photobucket.com. I hate having my computer linked through the college. blargh. Heh... okay so Chea and I went shopping yesturday and I got these two new tops. Well, one is really kick ass on me. Kinda 80s, but I make it look hot. ;P But this other gray one that I got... it is fucking LOW cut and see through! I did NOT know it was this... provocative. When I walked into work this morning I got checked out by everyone from my co-workers, to the Dean, to the janitors. lol I asked Mrs. Jill, a counselor, if she could see through it and she laughed and was like, "you have on a really pretty red bra." I gasped. I think I have been blushing all day... damn it. hahaha I suppose I should get back to filing... *sigh* toodles. **send me love! It makes me happy. :D

sigh

butterfly_tongues — Fri, 31 Aug 2007 20:39:55 GMT

I'm bored to death and I'm at work. I have one hour to stay in this dreadful chair. I should be doing Psych. homework, but it is friday and I can't bring myself to study.... *sigh* One hour.. thats all. then I go home, shave, get cute, and onto Chea's it is. :D parrrrty! yay!

I've missed it once again. :(

butterfly_tongues — Fri, 31 Aug 2007 14:07:48 GMT

Burningman was obviously this week... and I've missed it again. :( One of these days I swear I'm going to get out there. Right now I'm at work. I should be doing my psychology work, but I can't bring myself to crack open the book. I have a test tuesday... I haven't really been able to kick myself in the ass inorder to get really focused, yet this year with school. I don't know what is distracting me. I feel like right now my world is a blur. I can't tell what is real and what isn't. Somehow... I feel like I'm going to make a major mistake. It is like this... cloud of doom that I can't get from over my head. Nothing has happened so far, but I just feel it. The... parinoia of a perial that I can't face. I think I misspelled that.. oh well. I hope when this cloud chooses to open up and pour on me I make the right decision. I know one of the reasons why my life is so...blurry at the moment is my situation with Christ and how I refuse to allow him to have any place in my life. I'm not just the wondering sinner who doesn't know they are doing wrong. I'm purposefully turning my back on him. I just... don't want to be a hypocrite. I hate hypocrites and liars. I know I'm not going to stop living my life like I'm living it, so why put on a face every sunday and go to a building and act like I give a shit?! ....but I know I will have to reckon with him whether its when I'm standing in judgement or if it is while I'm still on the earth. My mother and father keep telling me how I'm meant for something great in "the Kingdom of the Lord". Hell if I know. Honestly, I act like I don't care and the majority doesn't, but I know He is why I can't sleep at night. He is the reason why I don't have peace in my life. I know He is the reason for me feeling the pressure of my addiction... But I don't want to give in. I'm so fucking stubborn. I think I'm just rambbling now.. I suppose this is the time where I need to be a good little girl and go do psychology homework. woopie. :P

and it starts all over again.

butterfly_tongues — Wed, 29 Aug 2007 14:22:42 GMT

Once again I have broken up with another boyfriend, left him broken hearted and crying... I'm saying this like I'm proud of it, so let me clarify my words. I'm sick of it. It has become a routine that I go through. Girl finds boy or vs. Girl thinks boy is interesting. Boy starts hanging out more and more with girl. Girl has a major sex drive, so boy and girl sleep together. Boy wants girl to be his girlfriend. Girl usually wants to say no, but is usually talked into it. Boy shortly after falls in love with girl. After a bit of time... girl leaves boy completely in love. For some reason any guy that truly gets to know me and spends time with me... falls in love. I'm not trying to sound cocky or on a high horse, but it is true... and it is annoying as fuck! Why can't I just find a guy who wants to be my friend?! Honestly, to me... friends with benifits is a wonderful phrase. Now on the flip side of this there is the wonderment of "do I want to find love if it is there for me?" .....duh. I am a girl. :P I want to be loved and I want to show all the love I have to give to a person, but for fuck's sake! I'm 20! I have plenty of time to find true love. I'm just sick and tired of feeling like such a bitch when I leave these guys and they are crying... they always cry. Why is that? everyone of them... I leave them crying. I have only cried over one guy and that I didn't do infront of him. Why is it that I feel the need to be more... cold. To guard myself more? I don't know what I'm thinking now, I suppose. Its 9 in the morning and I have to get to class. I suppose the point of this...blog.. was to say once again "I'M SINGLE!" woopie.

Ello again.

butterfly_tongues — Wed, 14 Feb 2007 21:48:54 GMT

I haven't posted on this blog in a bit... not sure why, but I havent. Moving on-- My life now? Going to school again. Yay for me! However, I have changed my major. I'm now going for Psychology/Counseling Ph.D I've actually got a plan for my life. Heh.. me... plan... funny, but I do! Hinds (small commuity college here in town)-2 years; The W (woman's college up north Mississippi)-2 years-Masters Degree; DUKE!!-Grad work- Ph.D So I'm looking at about another 8 to 10 years of school, but what I want to do is be a Drug and Alcohol Abuse Counselor for the FBI or CIA. I think I could do a lot of good here.... crazy cases, but a lot of good to be done. School right now is going okay. A few of my courses are getting a little hard. I HATE algebra. HATE IT!!! Alas, I must take and ace the course. Love life? I have a wonderful boyfriend, whom I think is "the one". I don't know though... People who don't agree with marriage have the arguing point of "No matter who you end up with, there is always someone out there better matched for you than the one you ended up with." I know this is a bit of a...doomed way to look at things, but it makes me think. Is Jason the one I shall be happy with for the rest of my life. My friends Amy and Chris keep telling about this guy named John who I would be "perfect" for. Should I give this John guy a chance? Or should I just be happy with the wonderful guy I have now? Blargh... I'm just letting it go and just flowing with it. Family and friends are the same. Actually, the friends are dwendeling... People are just getting boring to me. I stop calling, then they stop calling, and sooner more so than later we just fade away from each other and never speak again. Eh... I like my life right now. I'm happy. I'm just... not the social butterfly that I used to be. Oh well Toodle Oo!

One down, three to go....

butterfly_tongues — Wed, 28 Jun 2006 03:09:56 GMT

Yay! Finally I'm done with one essay!!! Wooooooot! One down...3 to go. ugh.... Tell me what you guys think. The Case for the Document Euthanasia is an issue that has troubled the waters for decades. The thought of playing the marionette master with death disturbs many citizens of America, but is the role as hideous as they portray? If a person is in a great deal of suffering, what is horrendous about helping another human being end the pain? When a horse breaks a leg, does the farmer not “put it to sleep”? Because the wording is changed from “killing” to “putting it to sleep”, is this act moral or ethical? “Euthanasia is a sick and twisted way of playing God...”, says Mark Windsor, medical professional at Mercy General Hospital, in Los Anglos, California. “Society as a majority views euthanasia as murder, and that is exactly what it is,” continues Windsor. Society in America deems euthanasia morally and ethically wrong, but is this the views of every individual? One doctor was accused of “assisted suicide”: Jack Kevorkian was arrested, booked, and convicted for helping over one hundred Americans who had been diagnosed as terminally ill. “Doctor Death” was the name assigned to him by the press. Although his intentions may have been noble, to relieve pain and suffering, his actions brought to light the unimaginable. Were Kevorkian’s actions mercy killings or murders? We as humans have to decide for our own minds where we draw the line on the value of an individual’s life. Are humans as valuable as the horse that is used to plow the field where the grain we eat is grown, or are we as humans on a different value scale completely? If the Western viewpoint changed the words used to describe Kevorkian’s actions from “murder” to “putting a human to sleep,” could society stomach the deed? In the book The Giver, by Lois Lowry, Jonas, the main character in the book serves as the community’s “Receiver”, taking all the memories of the world upon himself. Jonas sneaks into his father’s workplace one day and sees his father committing an awful act. Jonas’ father is a doctor in the community. Twins were born and his father kills one because twins are not allowed in the community. His father disposes of the body and then erases his mind of the event. To Jonas’ father this act is normal, expected, and done as a noble cause, to keep “sameness,” hence the “ordered life. ” Should the government be allowed to decide who dies and who lives? Or, should doctors be given the strand of life and the orders to “cut when needed”? A Living Will can answer all these questions. A Living Will is a document that allows a citizen to express his or her wishes upon the event when he or she cannot verbalize the wishes himself or herself. Issues such as belongings, estate, wealth, bills accumulated due to hospitalization, organ donations, and death wishes are addressed in a Living Will. Such a document takes the gun out of someone else’s hand and puts the gun into the wounded individual’s hand. A Living Will gives a choice of how and when we as Americans want to leave this life. In a moral context, “mercy killings” and “murders” are in fact one in the same. When pain of a loved one is involved, the decision of life or death is a tough one to make. This decision is one that comes down to the morals of each person. The moral person should choose life; however, each individual should have a chance to decide. The Living Will gives each person his or her own decision.

Time to breathe...

butterfly_tongues — Thu, 20 Apr 2006 19:33:40 GMT

I'm working rather hard on my book right now. I have a deadline coming up and I'm scrambling to get my 200 pages done. I never realized all the work that is invovled in this.... This is my second book, but this is the first one I have done of this nature. The first one almost drove me to my wits end, but I loved the final result. There is a picture of the cover in my photos. The cover was amazing. Moving on... I only have 2 friends at the moment, so I'm using this as a bit of a safe haven for me to write and express myself. My other blog is plagued with close friends and family. I have to censor myself when I write.. anyway... Tomorrow is going to be one of the hardest days for me to live through. April 21, 2005, my best friend and sister Carrie died of a heroin overdose as I held her... I saw the life fade from her... Her eyes still haunt me in my dreams. My best friend, of sorts, now Amy has Carrie's eyes. When I met her it terrified me to look into her eyes. It took me seeing her three times before I could bring myself to say anything to her. Now she clings to me. I'm her rock. Many many times she has put all her troubles on my shoulders and I have helped her carry them until the day she could bare them alone, but.... here lately she hasn't been able to return the favor for me. She hasn't been able to help me at all with my troubles. I know it bothers her, but... she can't help it. I need a rock... desperately. Now more than ever, but it seems that I have to walk through these hard times alone. I suppose its to make me stronger, but I pray every night to not have to go through them. Anyway, I'm getting off topic. I have no idea what I'm going to do tomorrow. I can't help but go through the last couple of hours in my mind that I had her on this earth with me. If I allow myself to stay in my mind for too long... I know its going to drive me back to the place I was right after she died and I'm terrified even more to go back to that place. When will the world be right in my soul again? When will my mind have peace again? When will I stop allowing this to torment me? I need to stop this.... The pictue is how I feel right now... I painted it 3 months after her passing. I feel... half hallow.... Hopefully Saturday will bring a brighter light to my eyes....

RWAR!

butterfly_tongues — Thu, 20 Apr 2006 16:58:21 GMT

How the hell do you upload pictures?????!!!!!!! This thing won't allow me to upload any! ...... *whimper* .....help?

hello.

butterfly_tongues — Wed, 19 Apr 2006 20:29:48 GMT

So this is my first post... These will get better as time goes by, I promise. Anyway, I believe this will be the end of my first post. lol toodles.