My Blog
Self Esteem
Fri, July 3, 2009 - 12:37 PM
Real Self Esteem comes from divine intelligence ....
Intimate Connections Tribe
marsandvenus.tribe.net/
"Self-acceptance, self-love, a positive self-image, the freedom to be ourselves; all these are crucial aspects of self-esteem. Whether seen from the ultimate perspective of spirituality, which exhorts us to be our true self, or from the more modest psychological imperative to develop a positive self-image, the struggle towards self-esteem is everyman's journey."
What we're speaking of today is Divine Intelligence, Spiritual awareness, and Faith
faith in one self, one's true self ...an inner knowing
So how do you develop healthy self-esteem? All experts agree that much of it is developed in the first three years of life. "The basic developmental task between 0 to 3 years is trust. The denial of trust impairs development of self-esteem,"
"Unconditional parental love at this stage is crucial. A constantly berated or ridiculed child will find it hard to develop good self-esteem. A critical teacher can hinder the development of good self-esteem, and so can negative peer experiences. At adolescence, acceptance or rejection in relationships, particularly with the opposite sex, can have an impact on self-esteem."
That perhaps is the crux of the matter. People with low self-esteem don't feel okay in being themselves. So they cover up who they are. One of the chief manifestations of this cover-up is creating a false self.
"Because we experience ourselves as flawed and defective, we cannot look at ourselves without pain. Therefore we must create a false self. The Jungians call it the 'Persona'. (Our Rising Sign or Ascendant)
The obliteration of the authentic self is the defense mechanism most of us use in order to earn external love and esteem, though at a high cost to ourselves. Says Sushma: "The real us came into the world absolutely open. But the urge to avoid being hurt at any cost drives us to ignore our intuition and listen instead to the society's voice that tells us what to do and what not to do, and which keeps judging us." (that's what the Ego is all about)
Fri, July 3, 2009 - 12:37 PM -
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Fri, July 3, 2009 - 12:38 PM
Substance of your dreams What is the most beautiful thing you can imagine? You have the ability to make that beauty real. How would life be if it were everything you could ever hope for? You are in a position to bring those hopes to life. Look beyond the superficial tokens and trinkets of the world, to the underlying hopes, dreams and possibilities that give them value. Those hopes, those dreams, those beautiful possibilities are yours the moment you choose to accept them. A successful life is not a matter of acquiring power and possessions. A successful life comes from giving meaning and purpose to the abilities and resources with which you are blessed. Approach success from that perspective, and there is no limit to what you can achieve. Seek the real substance of your dreams instead of their mere outward appearance, and you will not seek in vain. What is the most beautiful, wonderful life you can imagine? Commit yourself to it, and the best of it is already yours. |
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Fri, July 3, 2009 - 12:38 PM
Self esteem is related to your self worth and your value. Building self esteem is a first step towards your happiness and a better life. Self esteem increases your confidence. If you have confidence you will respect yourself. If you respect yourself you can respect others, improve your relationships, your achievements and your happiness.... Low self esteem causes depression, unhappiness, insecurity and poor confidence. Other's desires may take preference over yours. Inner criticism, that nagging voice of disapproval inside you, causes you to stumble at every challenge and challenges seem impossible. How to improve your esteem and confidence Want to increase your self confidence at work, enjoy presentations, improve your relationships, 1. Face your fears - they aren't as bad as you think they are. Facing your fears increases your confidence. 2. Forget your failures - learn from them. Avoid making the same mistakes again but don't limit yourself by assuming you failed before so you can't succeed this time. Try again, you're wiser and stronger. Don't be trapped in the past! 3. Know what you want and ask for it. You deserve your dreams to come true. 4. Reward yourself when you succeed. No-one else will! Isn't everything easier when you take time to help yourself? 5. Talk - We often make assumptions about a situation or person which are not true. Your attitude and behaviour can be negatively affected so if you have any doubt or question ask and don't assume you know why or how. There is much more about this point and about many of the others in a wonderful book I have read recently. I personally recommend you to read it too as you're going to get a lot out of it. It's called The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, 6. Don't be defeated! Try something else. You are not going to be defeated by one failed attempt are you? Doesn't everyone fail before they succeed? All you need is a different approach. |
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Fri, July 3, 2009 - 12:39 PM
Low Self Esteem can be cured! What you need to do A poor sense of self esteem can be beaten. Low esteem cannot survive if you follow what I have to say: Believe it, I have done it and you can too...but, You can begin living a life filled with happiness and meaning now! Poor self esteem can be unlearnt so take heart! Low Self Esteem - Here's what not to do: • Low self esteem feeds on negative messages and thoughts so Don't indulge in self criticism. Why are you joining the other side to wage war against yourself? Silence your inner judge. • Don't always try to please others. It is considerate when you care about others feelings but aren't your needs just as important? Don't neglect yourself! • Don't try to be like someone else. This leads to lack of self worth and confidence. You are unique and you cannot be someone else. Strive to be better yes but don't criticise yourself for not being as successful, as beautiful, as slim or as popular as somone else. You deserve better. • Don't take life or yourself so seriously. Failure just means you are not successful YET. Everybody fails on their way to succeeding, don't look on it as failure but as a means to learning. Perhaps you just need a change of direction. Problems can make you stronger if you strive to overcome them. Here's what to do: o Self worth, confidence and assuredness will increase when you Focus on your needs and desires. You deserve to live life as you want. This is not selfishness as what you want doesn't hurt others or prevent them from living life on their terms. o Focus on your successes. Lack of confidence feeds on your feelings of failure and inadequacy. Remember the truly successful things you have done in your life. Reward yourself when you do succeed. o Use positive affirmations and quotes. Read them every day or when you are feeling negative and need inspiration. Click here for a list of affirmations o Use visualisation to achieve your dreams and increase your self esteem! o Try this amazing self hypnosis download - Building your self esteem now! o Focus on your strengths. Use them. You will succeed if you are true to yourself. o Develop and work at achieving your goals. If you do this your confidence will increase and you will feel positive. o Your self criticism will die to nothing as you will know even if you do not succeed you tried all you could. Do your best at everything you try. o Feed your brain. Read inspiring books - they will really help you. Not just any books though, read the best. Self Esteem Increase your self esteem and your sense of self worth, read these quotes and reflect on their meaning: - Living: Words of inspiration can inspire you daily read them and speak them often! - self esteem and happiness: • Listen to your inner voice and follow them for it is wisdom that knows what is best for you. • Talk health, happiness and prosperity to every person you meet. • Think only of the best, to work only for the best and expect only the best-you deserve nothing less. • Care about the happiness and success of others and offer them all the help and encouragement they need. • Forget your past mistakes and focus on your successes encouraging yourself to greater achievements in the future. • Always do your best so you can be proud that you gave it your best shot. • When you help someone ask nothing in return, you will receive your reward ten times over. |
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Fri, July 3, 2009 - 12:40 PM
"Self-esteem is the disposition of experiencing oneself as competent in coping with the basic challenges of life and as being worthy of happiness." There are two components to Branden's definition. The first he calls self-efficacy: "Confidence in the functioning of my mind, in my ability to think, understand, learn, choose, and make decisions; confidence in my ability to understand the facts of reality that fall within the sphere of my interests and needs; self-trust, self-reliance." The second is self-respect: "Self-respect means assurance of my value; an affirmative attitude towards my right to live and be happy; comfort in appropriately asserting my thoughts, wants and needs; the feeling that joy and fulfillment are my natural birthright." Branden further subdivides these two factors into six components: • Living consciously: This is an active mind rather than a passive one, being in the moment, with a concern to know external and internal reality. Says he: "To live consciously means to be aware of everything that bears on our actions, purposes, values and goals to the best of our ability and to behave in accordance with that which we see and know." • Self-acceptance: This means accepting all feelings, thoughts and acts and being compassionate towards oneself. "Self-acceptance entails our willingness to experience—that is, to make real to ourselves without denial or evasion—that we think what we think, feel what we feel, desire what we desire, have done what we have done, and are what we are." • Self-responsibility: This includes being responsible for the achievement of desires, for the level of consciousness; our behavior with other people; for prioritizing time and for personal happiness. "In taking responsibility for our own existence we implicitly recognize that other human beings are not our servants and do not exist merely for satisfying our needs." • Self-assertiveness: It is your right to exist as you are. It is the acceptance that your life does not belong to others and that you are not here to live up to someone else's expectations. • Purposeful living: "To live purposefully is to use our power for the attainment of goals we have selected; the goal of studying, of raising a family, of earning a living," says Branden. • Personal integrity: "When our behavior is congruent with our professed values, when ideals and practice match, we have integrity." |
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Fri, July 3, 2009 - 1:03 PM
I am liking your message today
I am a big advocate of confidence and self-esteem True words Good vibe thanks brother |
