Firing Synapses

The HUMAN Dream: Burning Man '08

consciousdreamer — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 03:55:33 GMT

What is this thing; the dream of being human? We seem driven to be curious about the world/universe around us, spirit, novel new ideas and creations (Novelty in the McKenna sense of the word), to feel emotion . . to dream, to create. We due this as a matter of course for our nature; actually we do it so well no one even questions it. Our potential is unlimited; our place in the Universe as being conscious beings seemingly unique to our knowledge: the Universe aware of itself. Billions of years of space time have had to pass in order for there to be this moment, right here right now. Whole stars have lived and died to create the world stuff of planet we inhabit. Life had to begin and go through countless steps to produce us. The force behind this continues to move forward, making no mistakes, rolling no dice. Here we are as human's, the latest technology the Universe has created. . All creatures have played their role in the continuing journey that is the Evolution of the universe: greater and great organization, greater and great complexity. As the speed of evolution increases the world of thought, consciousness, and manifestation are the new grounds being laid by the Universe. Our ultimate role in this whole story is yet unknown, because the story is not done being told. What is this thing called "Human"? What is the dream of the Universe is placing Human's here and now; exactly where we belong, doing exactly what we do? As we approach and are drawn towards a seemingly inevitable singular moment in time: call it Revelation,the next step in evolution of consciousness, 2012, the Mayan Calendar, prophetic visions of all cultures and times, Apocalypse (which means "the lifting of the veil" interestingly), the coming of God/dess, whatever . .it's out there, and we seem to be playing our role. What does this dream of Human mean to you? -That is my theme for Burning Man 2008-

The Lost Amoung Us

consciousdreamer — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 16:28:14 GMT

Today I was at the famer's market, a rather popular groovy event in Santa Cruz. Drum cirlce, tons of friends, and so much yummy yummy food it's crazy. I was on my way out, backpacked loaded for Raindance campout this weekend; in additon to bumping into some of my favorite folks here in Santa Cruz. I walk by a younger man then me sitting on the edge by the street, short shaven brown hair, he has a little cardboard sign. I can tell he's not too used to the hussling for change bit, as I looked at him and usually if I look at someone and make a even slight acknowlegdement they hit me up for change. Usually it's some tweeker/alcked out guy who half demands your money as asks for it. Santa Cruz has a lot of people "spare some change"ing all over the place, most of them caught in self destructive patterns that are only supported by giving them money directly. I usually donate to the food kitchen, or the homeless garden project so I know the money is going to good use. But this time was different, he looked at me and then kinda turned away forlorn. As I walked past to my bike I read his sign. "Irag War Veteran- anything will help" Fuck. What do you say to that? Right here and now, not on the tv, or the paper, or argued in Congress. A real life flesh and blood victim of this horrible tragedy. I had met vets before, but they had been in a very different space. I was totally shaken. I looked at him and I saw a human being raw in the world, lost, and in need. Maybe it's because I have been thinking about these kind of things lately, as well as watching "Across the Universe" which also has segments dealing with the Vietnam vets returning home. I walked across the street to unlock my bike, my mind spinning in circles, and my heart totally ripped open. I reached into my wallet as I unlocked my bike, crossed the street and walked up to him. His sign had a pair of dog tags hanging from it, and a military ID with his picture on in. He didn't really catch that I was focused on him. I reached out. "Here man, get some food, kay?" He took the money, almost kinda shaken I had handed him a couple bucks. "Thanks so much" his voice shaking with a bit of surprise, relief and genuine gratitude and friendliness. We looked eachother in the eyes for just a moment, but it was enough, I felt the connection with him. He looked lost, wounded, proud- and ashamed of his situation. I know this guy had been handed some totally fucked raw deal, and probably had a closet of demon's tormenting him. It fuckin killed me. The feelings of love and compassion came over me as I smiled at him, letting my energy extend out to him. I wanted to ask him his story. How he had come to be here in this present moment. I felt this was a guy who had something to share, and who by simply listening too I could help; and there was a lesson here for me as well. And I couldn't bring myself to do it. As I walked away my mind screamed at me to turn around and talk to him. I wanted to be able to tell his story, add his journey to my own, as well as shine in his. What heald me back was a weak sense that I was prying, or that I would be doing this for me and not for his best interest. Or perhaps it is simply the barrier I feel between other people sometimes- even though I know he (and you) are parts of my perceptual field and there are no barriers really between any of us. I will have to consciously work on that lesson. No barriers, all is an extension of the self projected into this reality. Hell maybe I didn't do it becaue I didn't want to engage him from a place of pity/woundedness but instead want to share more positive vibrations with him and have us both be uplifted. The feeling kept growing and growing, I knew this was some important moment. I was on my bike, three blocks away when I made up my mind I had to go back and talk with this guy. As I pulled up, I realized he was gone already. I silently hoped he had gotten something he needed from me. Everything is as it is supposed to be, whatever this moment brought me. I hope I see him again. It's the least I can do.

Because I believe we can

consciousdreamer — Thu, 14 Feb 2008 07:34:45 GMT

I am not into rocking anyones boats, or beating over the head about politics, but I wanted to share this, cause it is one the first times a politician has ever really moved me. Though on Tribe, ya know. . most folks are okay with getting their boats rocked. I am not sure our two party system can ever REALLY put someone in office who will fundamentally change our country and take our government in a direction that is lead by peace, compassion, diversity, and humility- but this is the first politician I have ever heard speak who I really believed cares. A person of heart can go far if the people behind carry them there. I know he's not going to take us beyond the system we are in, but he is the best person we can actually get into office. He may not be perfect, but he's my best hope, and is the first one ever who made me believe. There is so much at stake, so many lives, and we can't afford to stay on the path we are on. "We have been warned against offering the people of America false hope. . . but in the unlikely story that is America there has never been anything false about HOPE." I want change. Enjoy this video, maybe you will believe too. . I also recommend watching his full speeches. Too bad tribe won't let ya embed videos www.youtube.com/watch?v=BHEO_fG3mm4

The Way of War?

consciousdreamer — Sat, 10 Nov 2007 10:06:15 GMT

And yes this too is a Burning Man image Keep it short, keep it short: hard when the subject is Iraq. Somehow it is really easy to tune out the war in certain ways, somehow focus mostly on your daily life and ponderings of the universe. To see "Three soldiers killed today by a road side bomb" in the paper. And three can be a small number. So easily it can be unreal. People protest against the war, everyone bitches, has some opintion (pro or con). High and mighty arguments are made, almost philsophical in nature. Day to day conversation in some circles who follow it Yatta de fucken yatta- and I live in Santa Cruz where the war is paritcurarly bad mouthed. But thats not real. Whats real is seeing video of a American vechile hitting a massive IED. Hearing soldiers talk about the intense constant fear of knowing that at any moment you might die. Or be maimed. Or see the person you've shared the last couple years of life shoulder to shoulder with blown to pieces. Total chaos, absolute and total insanity. I watched a program on the History Channel called "Band of Bloggers". In it American soldiers talk about what being on the line in Iraq is like. Complete with blog entrees and video. Raw emotion, the reality that people die. .and die. . and die. Seriously some moving ass shit. The History Channel is generally leaning towards the conservative side, and never was outright anti, but it was defintaely saying that people have no idea about what is really happening there, and how fucken brutual and raw this shit really is. There is video of the moment a vechile get hit by a IED, sniper fire on soliders, memorals to the fallen, and most key: actual interviews with soldiers talking about how it felt. One guy even talks being ambushed and taking fire in a vechile and seeing a guy get hit (live) and suddenly thinking being in the Army might have been real bad idea. I hear people bash soldiers, and yeah I know there is plenty of reason to disagree everything that military stands for. Seriously I know this. But really, when you see what the hell these kids are going through, fuck .. it is so intense you can't help but feel compassion for them. They are on the front line of what this all means, and it is real and I can't even begin to imagine being in that position. No wonder they keep it so basic in the news, no images, no coffins, no bodies, no showing people running in terror. No showing Americans gunning down people. Sure, you can see the gun going off on the news, but they don't show you what the hell they are hitting. What really sucks is this simply fact: is if I was there I would be pulling that trigger and doing the same fucking thing. Plain and simply survival. And they sure as fuck don't show you what happens when they hit Americans. This war would be over in a fucken heartbeat if that lead the news everyday for a week. Seriously, show America's youth being gunned down by a sniper or getting there Hummer blown to bits. This thing is fucked from every side. Everything. And what worse, what really really sickens me is that when I look around the world the trend seems to be going in a direction I can't hardly fathom. There is so much conflict in the world. So much war, threat of war, violence. What the hell is wrong with everyone!! Somehow we have ended up on a very dark path. I can only pray it is one that has light at the end. All this shit has to stop, we only serve to threaten ourselves in the end. I know I am so preaching to the choir here, I mean, y'all are my friends and I sure most of you feel the same way. It just brings up this primal, icky, horrible sensation when I let feel into it deeply. What does this say of our consciousness? What does this say of the race of men? And when are we going to do something different? And how much longer are we going to keep it up? I wanted to end this positively. You know I usually do. I even wrote it- then deleted it. And I will toss in some really really juicy good stuff in the end. BUT (the big negative that happens when you drop that word in front of statements): This shit has no warm fuzzy. Trust whatever you call sacred. . . hold what is dear near. . spread love. . do good in the world. . live your life in service. . look to build community. . smile. .laugh. . hug. . make love. . dance and keep the spirit alive!!!!! :)

Fr-EaK-ers Ball!

consciousdreamer — Mon, 29 Oct 2007 06:29:03 GMT

Owww I so love you guys!! Last night was fantastic!!!! Big big props to Raindance for taking the Freakers Ball to a whole new level. I feel so inspired, renewed, blissed. . . what an amazing amazing community we are. We are so lucky that our lives have bestowed this path to us. To all the friends and family I got to conect with (and so many of you who I didn't even imagine would be there!) thank you for sharing the experience!! It's awesome to see so many of you head out to Santa Cruz, as well as all the local family that are near and dear. LOVE to you all! Next up: Hay Maze on the 10th!

Sustainable People and the next step

consciousdreamer — Mon, 15 Oct 2007 05:10:33 GMT

Been having the super major download this last week, and decided to share my thinking. Welcome to my mind. . Our community is rich with talk of sustainability, yet we need not look too far to see that at this moment we are hooked/trapped into doing things in the gross excess that modern civilization does. Even the best of our intentions can only take us so far, as the system is built upon unstainability. Our cars, our homes, our food, our energy, things shipped all around the world- I mean there is no way for me or you to not be a participant in this jeopardy. I mean look: we all love music right? Well inside that turntable, this computer, the lights, all of it is raw materials that were minded, pumped from the ground, or cut from the earth. A turntable is a collection of petroleum and metals, and some really nasty chemicals were used in the manufacture of said components. See what I mean? that we have so far to go to escape what we have created. I guess it started when I got this question on my mind: are we ready to give up so much of what we take for granted to have a sustainable world? And we ready to give up our world as we know it? Can the race of man do it for survival? We are all children of a world that we have only known to provide us with an abundance of freedoms and excesses granted solely by human technology that is at it's core an unstaintable function. All metals are mined and refined; a process which requires massive amounts of energy, and pillage of the earth for raw materials. We all know about our obsession with and dependence on oil, our most primary energy source, and also a key building block in plastics, and SOO many other things (fertilizers, drugs, fabrics, etc etc). Other material resources we produce and depend on that are unstainably harvested are wood, food, water. Water in particular is a essential key to our modern world, and it is dangerously threatened. Only because in the last few hundred years that man has harnessed energy are we able to do so much to alter the environment- and forget not that we are only the loss of electricity away from not being able to fight off the elements as well as we do at this time. At all times massive amounts of energy go towards simply fending off cold/heat, storms, water, and earth. If that stopped tommorrow we would be at the behest of natural forces in a way none of us could imagine. Everything in our society is absolutely dependent on this constant flow of energy- and it's big big big if you add it up. The ability of our race to live in sustainably is so undoubtedly there. ALL the technology we need to make the situation a hell of a lot better, and to work towards improving the entire system towards a green model is so possible. But it means the laying down of so much that we have, and shifting the entire way mankind lives. Most noteably is the surrendering of war, a TOTAL and utter waste of our energy and resources. This one really gets me. .don't even get me started!!! We can have our cake eat it too: be modern, using advanced technologies and co-operation to live healthy, happy abundant lives. We can even regain some of the heritage that man has had for eons of living in co-exsistance with the world around him and appreciating this miracle of life. The utopian world of paradise is in our grasp, we have only to reach for it. The desire exsists, the tools exsist- and so do those who resist what must come to pass one way or another. They seek to hold old reigns of power and wealth and control the course of humanity in the name of power and gain. The old guard, who use denial, ignorance, and hatred as thier tools to supress the rise in human consciousness. This ride will come to end, and even thier great human power will not stop that from happening. The fact of the matter is that there are too many billions of humans living in a way that requires so much to be taken from the earth to live as we do. I don't believe (and it humbles me, and also sets me to acknowledging my role in creating a future) that we are the ones who are capabible of living in a sustainable world. And I don't think humanity is going to let go willingly of what we have created. The system is going to have to break, and from that breaking a new breed of human will be born, one who knows the world only as a sustainable environement, and life most likely far simpler and older than we live now. We simply cannot continue infinately on the path mankind has chosen to follow- and sooner or later it must break down, be it manmade disaster (resource wars, imperilism, religous intolerance, what have you) or climate/external catastophy (global warming resource loss, water shortage, energy crisis, stellar event, fuckin little green men). I set my vision on promoting the model of change in our society, while also seeking to birth the new conciousness of human that will come to inhabit this world when I pass. The experiment that is life, that is the universe being self aware, that is consciousness will not be stopped due any of this action, simply a new model, with the latest evolved trait- sustainability. I know that I am but one life, one person, a small part of a much greater whole, in a much greater dance then I can even comprehend. How many have lived and died to make this moment here and now possible? One step beyond: how much has happened in the billions of years of existance that have lead to making this moment possible? Whole stars were born, lived, and died just to create the raw elements around us. This planet cooled for a couple billion years. Six billion has passed on this rock alone. Life rose from the oceans, breated air, developed nervous systems, just so that I can sit here the peak of evoltion (for the moment) and have amazing body I/we have. All for the miracle of this moment. I am give gratitude for my experiences, for the life I get to live in this incarnation. My spirit, your spirit, we are all a part of something so great- we are so blessed. In that we are infinitely part of the greatness that is Creation.The time for our model to be retired is coming, and for that I rejoice. The next generation will rise like the pheonix from our ashes. That is the way of things: the shape may change, but the course does not. New models are called for with changing conditions. I will do my part whaterver that maybe in this transition, as that is why I am here, and can do no other even if I wanted too. We are all a part of it, it can be felt in the very air. Consciousness moves on . . .

My truck got stolen!!

consciousdreamer — Sun, 07 Oct 2007 04:16:06 GMT

Sigh . .from 4 mile beach today- out spinning staff, doing qi gong, and. .Gone, vanished, unbelievable. If you would join me in focusing intentions on it turning up safe and sound in the very near future, I would be very honored. Owww and if you see a red Toyota pick up with a green Bassnectar sticker on the back of the camper shell, call the cops! This truck has been an investment and dearly loved, I got only 6 months ago, and am not really in a great position to go replace it. I want my baby back! sniffle sniffle. .

More Lies to Sell More War

consciousdreamer — Wed, 12 Sep 2007 05:04:53 GMT

"When the Goverment tells nothing but Lies; TRUTH is a Revolution"- from 1984 by George Orwell I am non-believer in war to begin with, while also being keenly aware of what hangs in the balance now in Iraq due our involvement. Let us not forget that this seeds of this war was sold 6 years ago today as a lie from day 1, and planned well in advance of its unveiling to our so easy misled public. And this bullshit in Washington today is a total whitewash of the truth serving only to further engage our country in dark tyranny. Today marks the biggest lie ever sold in American history: the events and tragedies of 9/11. That show had only one purpose: to produce a drama that would shift the minds of the American people to supporting US imperialism in the Middle East. Behind this hides the true motives of profiteering, explotation, and the continued reign of global socio-economic and military dominance. It is some how fitting that today the military/govermental machine will once again sell deception to continue a war that has more to do profiteering and imperialism then terrorism or "freedom". So let the souls of all those who has died in the name of this Empire pass in peace, so much blood has been spilled for nothing that there loss is a shame to us all. If only we could see eachother as brothers and sisters acknowledging our shared human experience it would be so easy to end this unthinkable violence. So simple. . . imagine what humanity could accomplish if we united rather then divided. Get active: start with Moveon.org It is time for us to call an end to endless wars.

Compression

consciousdreamer — Sun, 09 Sep 2007 20:48:23 GMT

Finally home!! And boy do I feel WeIrD . .really wEiRd! I know all about post Burn Compression, but this is something different. Mix compression with close relationships. .and hit frappe' . .hehehe. . This has been a crazy trriiipppeee two weeks. As soon as I walked in my door I realized how much I have been through/changed. . and looking back over one crazy awesome summer . . wow. . if only I could explain. All the "normal" things and events that people talk about are kinda tripping me out. . I don't know. .words fail me right now. So come hang out, I need my sweet yummy peeps!!! That means you! Back to working this week, but I gots time, so hit me up!

A New Direction. .

consciousdreamer — Fri, 10 Aug 2007 02:15:19 GMT

"Leap and the net shall appear" and varations there of have been my theme the last couple weeks. . and so. .I did!! Told New Leaf I was giving up my buying position, and low and behold BLAAMMOOO!! Along came a one day a week gig at a physical therapy clinic! I have been looking for this move since last year!!! Add to that teaching, seeing clients at Midline, and my privates. .and holy shit. . I am really running my own business. CRAZY!! I am a "professional" . . hahahaa. . can you believe? So many of you saw me start into this, watched me run myself ragged persuing a dream . . and I love you all for your support over the years!! Heck, I never would have made it this far, and I am sure I'll still be needing it in all my years to come. The last 6 months really has been a super blossoming on every level of my life, especially workwise. I'll save everything else for another blog. So what does it mean? It means I have fully moved into doing bodywork . .the whole dream of "be a bodyworker, make good money, set your own schedule, work few hours . .do work you love" shit may have taken 4 1/2 years to see through, but now I am knocking on that door! The last year or two has been intense as I have built my business and given so much sacrifice without question. No more 6am start times, no more 15 hour work days, no more 50-60 hour 6 day work weeks, no more having no time for my personal life, no more in bed by 11pm, no more sucking it up doing shit I am so over, and I get to get back into heavy martial arts training like I did for years. . owww I am so stoked! True: I will still be hoping to pick up 8-16 hours a week at New Leaf, but that is my way out the door as far as I am concerned. I'll be winging it a bit finacially, but "carpe diem" baby!! Sieze the motherfuckin moment and oppurtunity will present itself of that I have no doubt. Abudance is everywhere. . P.S. If you know anyone who is in need of some bodywork . . So I start next week; going to be completely busy doing all my shit + New Leaf chasing them dollars while I can, all the way up until the Burn, and then I come home to a whole new world. . an end if you will, and a whole new beginning!!! Next blog: the year in review and a path for the future. . so easy to set my calendar by Burning Man . .and man has this year just been epic!!! Can't wait to share that story. So much blessing, love, growth. . . I getting teary:) Love ya all!!!

Hopi Elders Wisdom

consciousdreamer — Thu, 26 Jul 2007 05:54:50 GMT

It so resonates with every fiber of my being . . . . true wisdom From The Elders, Oraibi, Arizona Hopi Nation November 2004 "You have been telling the people that this is the Eleventh Hour. Now you must go back and tell the people that this is the Hour. And there are things to be considered: Where are you living? What are you doing? What are your relationships? Are you in right relation? Where is your water? Know your garden. It is time to speak your Truth. Create your community. Be good to each other. And do not look outside yourself for the leader. This could be a good time! There is a river flowing now very fast. It is so great and swift that there are those who will be afraid. They will try to hold on to the shore. They will feel they are being torn apart, and they will suffer greatly. Know the river has its destination. The elders say we must let go of the shore, push off into the middle of the river, keep our eyes open, and our heads above the water. See who is in there with you and celebrate. At this time in history, we are to take nothing personally. Least of all, ourselves. For the moment that we do, our spiritual growth and journey comes to a halt. The time of the lone wolf is over. Gather yourselves! Banish the word "struggle" from your attitude and your vocabulary. All that we do now must be done in a sacred manner and in celebration. We are the ones we've been waiting for." --The Elders, Oraibi, Arizona Hopi Nation" November 2004

Need to find a sickdistic Theme Camp for the Burn ASAP!

consciousdreamer — Sun, 08 Jul 2007 19:09:06 GMT

Okay, I got official word from my partner in crime (saddening really) today that this year his Burning Man status is shaky and I set free to do my own thing. Wow, so many choices. .freedom in every direction! I want to find a theme camp that is in the pARTicipation mode, full on making it happen, bumping, grinding playa life! The bigger the better- I got friends all over the playa so this year I want to really find the most sick illest camp to shower my brand of love upon and with. Not to mention I want to be moving and grooving with some cool ass new friends as well! I can be on the playa a day or two early to help set up and do grunt work, offer my bodywork skills or lead a class on massage/martial arts-movement in a camp that does workshops. And ????? you tell me! Come on, ya know you love me . . . besides I Burn hard, and you know you want to as well!! Hit me up with what you gots going on and lets make some shit happen!! Only 6 weeks to go!!!!!