I use match.com. It's really frustrating because so many profiles have too many qualifiers, too much sales pitch and too many windy walks and sunsets. It's hard to dig through the rap sheets and find *people* who can talk to each other without applying for the job of "soulmate".

Today I was wandering through Issaquah following an impulse to see if I could find a place to buy a DVD on my wish list. I stopped at a second hand store I'd never heard of and ended up chatting with the shopgirl for nearly 20 minutes on favorite shows, movies, things she recommended, etc. A bit too young for me and a bit too married, she is not someone who might have caught my eye in a photograph, but in fact she emerged as an animated, funny and genuine young woman. Turns out we had the same sensibilities in the few topics we covered. She was kind and we laughed at each other's jokes and she impressed me on more than one level. I liked her and I grew attracted to her as we talked. And I was surprised.

I think that the surprise came from the unexpected connection. It was a small connection of course, but that was what made it great. It didn't mean that we'd grow old together, it just meant we had something to talk about. And it was more than just the questions that people ask each other as they ride the interview that a first date can turn into. Better yet, we weren't on a date, and we had no intentions--her ring made that clear. I think we just had fun talking.

I am an introverted work-in-progress and a bit of a workaholic--I don't meet a lot of people--so forgive me that eye contact over a counter can impress me. I knew she started out working a customer to establish a rapport, but I enjoyed it as it was going swimmingly. I enjoyed that 20 minutes more than I enjoy most dating experiences. Because it wasn't an interview and by a personal connection I knew that this is someone I could talk to as a friend.

And that after all is what I would really like more than anything else.