Memorial Day

(Note: the figures herein are several years out of date. As of today, there is only one [1] American World War I vet still alive. Too, there are probably two-million-odd fewer WWII, Korean and Vietnam vets alive since this list was compiled.

(Whatever the numbers, today we recognize those men and women who made the ultimate sacrifice for this nation.

(P.S. As with last year's Thanksgiving post: if you have any hipster/contrarian snark ready to spew, please re-insert it in the orifice from whence it came.)

Decoration Day, now Memorial Day.

American Revolution (1775–1783)
Total servicemembers 217,000
Battle deaths 4,435

War of 1812 (1812–1815)
Total servicemembers 286,730
Battle deaths 2,260

Indian Wars (approx. 1817–1898)
Total servicemembers 106,0001
Battle deaths 1,0001

Mexican War (1846–1848)
Total servicemembers 78,718
Battle deaths 1,733
Other deaths in service (nontheater) 11,550

Civil War (1861–1865)
Total servicemembers (Union) 2,213,363
Battle deaths (Union) 140,414
Other deaths in service (nontheater) (Union) 224,097
Total servicemembers (Conf.) 1,050,000
Battle deaths (Conf.) 74,524
Other deaths in service (nontheater) (Conf.) 59,2972

Spanish-American War (1898–1902)
Total servicemembers 306,760
Battle deaths 385
Other deaths in service (nontheater) 2,061

World War I (1917–1918)
Total servicemembers 4,734,991
Battle deaths 53,402
Other deaths in service (nontheater) 63,114
Living veterans fewer than 251

World War II (1940–1945)
Total servicemembers 16,112,566
Battle deaths 291,557
Other deaths in service (nontheater) 113,842
Living veterans 3,242,0001

Korean War (1950–1953)
Total servicemembers 5,720,000
Serving in-theater 1,789,000
Battle deaths 33,741
Other deaths in service (theater) 2,833
Other deaths in service (nontheater) 17,672
Living veterans 3,086,4001

Vietnam War (1964–1975)
Total servicemembers 8,744,000
Serving in-theater 3,403,000
Battle deaths 47,424
Other deaths in service (theater) 10,785
Other deaths in service (nontheater) 32,000
Living veterans 7,286,5001

Gulf War (1990–1991)
Total servicemembers 2,225,000
Serving in-theater 665,476
Battle deaths 147
Other deaths in service (theater) 382
Other deaths in service (nontheater) 1,565
Living veterans 1,852,0001

Global War on Terror (as of Sept. 30, 2006)
Total Servicemembers (Worldwide) 1,384,968
Deployed to Iraq and Afghanistan 165,000
Iraq Battle Deaths 3328
Afghanistan Battle Deaths 507
Iraq Other Deaths (In Theater) 754
Afghanistan Other Deaths (In Theater) 313
Living Veterans 588,9236

America's Wars Total
Military service during war 43,185,893
Battle deaths 653,708
Other deaths in service (theater) 14,560
Other deaths in service (nontheater) 525,930
Living war veterans 17,835,0004
Living veterans 23,976,000

Hitler Goes to Burning Man

(Thanks to BnB of the RWB Tribe for this one -- definitely the funniest YouTube video I've seen in a LONG time!)

www.youtube.com/watch

Happy May Day!

In the words of some anonymous wit:

Hooray! Hooray!
It's the First of May!
Outdoor fucking begins today!

Mikal the Nude Model

Well, that's another "first" for me...

Last Saturday night, I went to the "Gallerie N!ne" opening at the 285 Ninth Street space in SF. The Gallerie is a spin-off project from the Anon Salon parties, which promised "a more intimate and socially creative side" of that scene. Anon lately has relocated to the Outer Mission's Whisper club, for reasons I can't really discuss here, and this seemed to be an attempt to use the Ninth Street complex for a more art-oriented social gathering.

That night the Gallerie started out rather slowly and sedately. Essentially it was a multi-artist opening with promised music and dancing in the later hours, and for the first couple of hours, the crowd was pretty much confined in little cliques around the displays and the donation-only bars. I wandered around a bit and chatted up a few folks, but was rather bored on the whole. The wild costumes and edgy energy of Anon just weren't there, and I wondered if they'd ever manifest themselves.

I was about to leave around eleven, but Ninth Street gallery tenant, artist and Party Girl Dee Dee Russell told me to hold on a bit longer. "These parties don't *really* get going until midnight," she insisted, and based on my experience with Anon, I knew she was right. At her suggestion, I put on a black-and-white tiger-striped shrug and a string of fake pearls as a costume (the color theme for the evening was monochrome) to help get myself into the spirit, and decided to hold on until the scheduled "creative festivities" began at 11:30.

And that was precisely when the costumed Anon regulars began to show up. The mood changed rapidly from art opening to party as the multicolored Anon-imites joined the drably-clad art crowd, live music kicked in from the small stage, and newcomers flooded the two bars.

While wandering around the complex, I stepped into a brightly-lit room that seemed to be especially crowded, although not particularly noisy. There, nearly everyone's attention fixed on a young, blonde woman who was standing on a riser, standing perfectly still, and wearing nothing but a feather mask and black bondage boots. In front of her, seven or eight people were sketching with colored pencils and crayons on tablets. "Ah ha," I thought, "a live nude model must be part of the 'creative festivities.'"

I returned to the room a few minutes later, and saw that the woman was taking a break: sitting on the riser and talking with Kelly, a woman who I'd chatted with earlier and who seemed to be one of the party organizers. When Kelly spotted me, she asked me if I wanted to model as well.

"Why me?" I asked?

"You're already half-naked," she observed (I was wearing the B&W shrug Burner-style over a bare chest). "Why not go all the way?"

She had a point. And I was just buzzed and bored enough to meet the challenge. In less than a minute, I was out of my trousers and briefs, and mounting the riser alongside Steffi the female model, wearing nothing but the shrug and black cowboy boots. (Oh, and the Mardi Gras pearls, which a female, self-described "sex educator" had likened to female ejaculate a while earlier.)

For the next hour, Steffi and I were bent into various positions by the room's ringleader, professional magician Marlow the Mystic, while he and the other artists sketched drawings of us. Maybe it was the fact that both of us were wearing high-topped, glossy black boots, but some of the poses we got into were very mildly D/S. For several of them, Marlow partly draped us with a satin sheet, leading more than one person to say that, with my short hair and taut build, I resembled a nude Roman gladiator who was holding his naked slave girl.

The experience of posing naked and (mostly) motionless in front of a group of artists, while scores of friends and total strangers wandered in and out to gawk at us, was...different. Despite the fact I was pressed physically against a young, attractive and friendly nude woman, I didn't really have any embarassing physical reactions, probably because most of my blood, muscle and consciousness was focused on holding the poses. After awhile, my arms started to get very sore from the work, and I was glad for the short breaks when I could stretch, drink beer, and examine the sketches people had made of us, which varied wildly in style and technique. I'm sorry that I didn't take any samples back, as they would have made great illustrations for this post, as well as nice souvenirs.

On the whole, the impromptu nude-model session seemed to work out well for all concerned. Steffi, who does this work for a living, told me that I was a natural, and couldn't believe that I'd never modeled before. The artists thought we both made great subjects, and were happy to have a gender balance to work with. And Gallerie organizer Joegh thanked me for volunteering.

Who knows -- at the next Gallerie, I might do it again.

A Ballade of Suicide, by G.K. Chesterton

The gallows in my garden, people say,
Is new and neat and adequately tall;
I tie the noose on in a knowing way
As one that knots his necktie for a ball;
But just as all the neighbours on the wall
Are drawing a long breath to shout "Hurray!"
The strangest whim has seized me. . . After all
I think I will not hang myself to-day.

To-morrow is the time I get my pay
My uncle's sword is hanging in the hall
I see a little cloud all pink and grey
Perhaps the rector's mother will NOT call
I fancy that I heard from Mr. Gall
That mushrooms could be cooked another way
I never read the works of Juvenal
I think I will not hang myself to-day.

The world will have another washing-day;
The decadents decay; the pedants pall;
And H.G. Wells has found that children play,
And Bernard Shaw discovered that they squall;
Rationalists are growing rational
And through thick woods one finds a stream astray,
So secret that the very sky seems small
I think I will not hang myself to-day.


ENVOI

Prince, I can hear the trumpet of Germinal,
The tumbrils toiling up the terrible way;
Even to-day your royal head may fall
I think I will not hang myself to-day.

Proclamation on the First "Official" Thanksgiving

(As a counterpoint to various Tribesters, who've been trotting out the usual anti-American/-family/-Christian/-white/-meat-eating/-tradition rants during this holiday week, I give to you this proclamation. It's from a time when we were fighting a far bloodier and more divise war *on our own land*, and had a lot less of a shared economic, political and cultural infrastructure to take for granted and whine about.

Happy Thanksgiving to all Tribesters. And the pale ghost of William S. Burroughs, as well as all the admirers of his vicious, spiteful, trust-fund-junkie nihilism, can kiss my 100% American ass.)

PRESIDENT LINCOLN'S THANKSGIVING DAY PROCLAMATION, OCTOBER 3, 1863.

The year that is drawing toward its close has been filled with the blessings of fruitful fields and healthful skies. To these bounties, which are so constantly enjoyed that we are prone to forget the source from which they come, others have been added, which are of so extraordinary a nature that they cannot fail to penetrate and soften the heart which is habitually insensible to the everwatchful providence of almighty God.

In the midst of a civil war of unequaled magnitude and severity, which has sometimes seemed to foreign states to invite and provoke their aggressions, peace has been preserved with all nations, order has been maintained, the laws have been respected and obeyed, and harmony has prevailed everywhere, except in the theater of military conflict; while that theater has been greatly contracted by the advancing armies and navies of the Union.

Needful diversions of wealth and of strength from the fields of peaceful industry to the national defense have not arrested the plow, the shuttle, or the ship; the ax has enlarged the borders of our settlements, and the mines, as well of iron and coal as of the precious metals, have yielded even more abundantly than heretofore. Population has steadily increased, notwithstanding the waste that has been made in the camp, the siege, and the battlefield, and the country, rejoicing in the consciousness of augmented strength and vigor, is permitted to expect continuance of years with large increase of freedom.

No human counsel hath devised, nor hath any mortal hand worked out these great things. They are the gracious gifts of the most high God, who while dealing with us in anger for our sins, hath nevertheless remembered mercy.

It has seemed to me fit and proper that they should be solemnly, reverently, and gratefully acknowledged as with one heart and one voice by the whole American people. I do, therefore, invite my fellow-citizens in every part of the United States, and also those who are at sea and those who are sojourning in foreign lands, to set apart and observe the last Thursday of November next as a day of thanksgiving and praise to our beneficent Father who dwelleth in the heavens. And I recommend to them that, while offering up the ascriptions justly due to him for such singular deliverances and blessings, they do also, with humble penitence for our national perverseness and disobedience, commend to his tender care all those who have become widows, orphans, mourners, or sufferers in the lamentable civil strife in which we are unavoidably engaged, and fervently implore the interposition of the almighty hand to heal the wounds of the nation, and to restore it, as soon as may be consistent with the Divine purposes, to the full enjoyment of peace, harmony, tranquillity, and union.

In testimony whereof, I have hereunto set my hand and caused the seal of the United Stated States to be affixed.

Reposted at Sunburn Sarah's request:

YOU'RE ON MY FRIENDS LIST, I WANNA KNOW YOU...I want to know 36 things about you. I don't care if we never talk, never liked each other, or if we already know everything about each other. Short and sweet is fine...You're on my list, so I want to know you better! BE HONEST COPY FROM HERE THEN SEND DIRECTLY TO ME IN A MESSAGE THEN, REPOST THE EMPTY QUESTIONS AS A BULLETIN.

1.)Q. Can you cook?
1.)A.

2.)Q. What was your dream growing up?
2.)A.

3.)Q. What talent do you wish you had?
3.)A.

4.)Q. If I bought you a drink what would it be?
4.)A.

5.)Q. Favorite vegetable?
5.)A

6.)Q. What was the last book you read?
6.)A.

7.)Q. What zodiac sign are you ?
7.)A.

8.)Q. Any Tattoos and/or Piercings?
8.)A

9.)Q. Worst Habit?
9.)A.

10.)Q. If you saw me walking down the street would you offer me a ride?
10.)A.

11.)Q. What is your favorite sport?
11.)A

12.)Q. Negative or Optimistic attitude?
12.)A.

13. )Q. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me?
13.)A

14.)Q. Worst thing to ever happen to you?
14.)A.

15.)Q. Tell me one weird fact about you
15.)A

16.)Q. Do you have any pets?
16.)A.

17.)Q. What if i showed up at your house unexpectedly?
17.)A.

18.)Q. What was your first impression of me?
18.)A.

19.)Q. Do you think clowns are cute or scary?
19.)A.

20.)Q. If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be???
20.)A

21.)Q. Would you be my crime partner or my conscience?
21.)A


22.)Q. What color eyes do you have?
22.)A.

23.)Q. Ever been arrested?
23.)A.

24.)Q. Bottle or Draft?
24.)A.

25.)Q. If you won $10,000 dollars today, what would you do with it?
25.)A.

26.)Q. Would you date me?
26.)A.

27.)Q. What 's your favorite place to hang at?
27.)A.

28.)Q. Do you believe in ghosts?
28.)A.

29.)Q. Favorite thing to do in your spare time?
29.)A.

30.)Q. Do you swear a lot?
30.)A.

31.)Q. Biggest pet peeve?
31.)A.

32.)Q. In one word, how would you describe yourself?
32.)A.

33.)Q. Do you believe/appreciate romance?
33.)A.

34.)Q. If you could spend 12 hours with me and ask/do anything you like, what would it be?
34.)A.

35)Q. Do you believe in God?
35)A.

36.)Q. Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same?

Burning Man 2007

Well, I'm on my second day of recovery from Burning Man. As before, it was a week's worth of heat, dust, amazing art, bizarre experiences, stratospheric highs, catastrophic lows, nudity, bicycling, parties, dancing, beer, vodka, pot, art cars, costumes, desert sunrises and sunsets, and far too much else to list here.

One dubious "first" for me: I had to visit the Med Tent after I spent a little too long raising shade structures and hauling equipment in the 105-degree sun. (Yes, I know I'd promised not to do this again, but I had committed to help another camp before I came to the Playa, and fell victim to my own compulsions and extreme sense of responsibility.) Luckily, all I had was a mild case of sunstroke, but it still ruined my Thursday, and strained BRC's greatly-overtaxed medical services that much more.

So what were the highlights? Well, the Burn was particularly spectacular this year, partly because the Man had already survived a premature attempt to ignite him on Monday, and had been rebuilt a little TOO well, so that it took nearly an hour for him to collapse...and then only because he was forcibly pulled down by one of the guy wires. A couple of hours later, the "Oil Tower" -- a 100-foot structure a couple hundred yards out from 2:00 and Esplanade, also went up, this time with an immense mushroom cloud of fire that must have been visible from the Space Shuttle.

And of course, I always enjoy my countless interactions with thousands of fellow Burners. Capitalist pig that I am, I do like the idea of having a special set place and time where *no cash transactions take place*, as it creates not only a "gift economy" where one becomes very conscious of others' needs and one's own surplus, but also a very different ethos and style of interaction when the constant buy/sell mode is absent. The kindness, creativity, resourcefulness, and humor of Burners never ceases to amaze me.

Oh, about the RV -- definitely a wise investment. Especially when the white-out dust-storms blew through on Thursday and Friday afternoons (the latter one was followed by a short rainstorm). Next year, however, I might just rent a HardTent trailer, and take care of my bathroom needs with a privy and a sun shower.

Here are some other highlights:

* Marching with 70 other nude guys in the now-annual "Critical Dicks" parade -- "The PenIs Mighter than the Sword!"
* The gorgeous, perfect double rainbow over the Playa after the Friday afternoon rainstorm
* Partying naked (literally!) and drinking rudely-named vodka concoctions with Velvet Soulmine. Gotta love those gay Southerners!
* Dancing around the fiery remains of the Man on Saturday night.
* Smoking a "European joint" (hash and tobacco) with a guy from Bristol, England
* Playing a deranged, hilarious game of miniature golf on the Esplanade with Leslie M.
* The laser-beam art piece that played music whenever you ran hands through the rays.
* Writing dedications to my late grandparents on the Temple walls -- surely the smoke of that edifice will ascend to their current home like a burnt offering.
* A late dinner of sushi, noodles, miso soup, soy-flavored wheat-gluten faux-meat, and plum wine at Monticello Camp
* and a lot of other stuff that I can't remember right now.

And I'd like to thank the following people for making this year's BM such a great experience: Dave C. (my campmate); Heather, Seth, Todd and the rest of the Portland contingent; Blue and Teal; Leslie and Michelle; the Med Tent staff; Captain Erotica and his crew; Alice from SC; Velvet Soulmine; Campbell from Oz and his GF at Monticello; Coyote; Fletch from Marin and his Magic Boombox; Nekkid Jim and the Critical Dicks marchers and supporters; Jessy/Eris; the entire BM volunteer and paid staff; Gerlach, Empire and Nixon locals; and all of the 46,000-odd folks who made it out to the Playa this year.

See you at Decompression! :-)

Tomorrow I'll be on the Playa...

If you're Burning as well, I'll see you there.
If not, you'll be in my thoughts, and I'll see you again around Labor Day.

}'{

Doing Burning Man in STYLE

At the end of last year's Burning Man, I was a less-than-happy Burner.

Sure, there'd been the usual plethora of amazing art, friendly folks, fun doings, and once-in-a-lifetime experiences. But they'd been somewhat outweighed by the discomfort of Playa camping, especially as part of a 150-person major-art-installation group.

I joked later that the whole thing was like a week-long bivouac with the Army Corps of Engineers. Too much time was spent humping 80-lb boxes of tools and supplies back and forth, wrestling with sputtering generators, or re-erecting blown-over three-person wooden shower structures. And I was trying to hide from whirlwinds, dust storms, and 100-degree heat (sometimes all three at once!) behind the thin vinyl skin of what Big 5 laughingly refers to as a "three-person" tent.

I know, I know...putting up with the hardships and working on cooperative projects is supposed to be part of *The Burning Man Experience*. But I'm getting into the age and income bracket where I just don't feel like roughing it any more on the Playa as part of some labor-intensive mass-art project. So I went looking to rent an RV.

Trust me, folks -- this is NOT something you want to wait until June to do. The few rentals that were available were being snapped up fast, and were fetching outrageous prices, especially for the peak-week of late August.

But through persistence and good luck, I finally nailed down a rental: a 2001 26' RV C-Class (that means it's got a bed area over the cab). This is a luxury apartment on wheels: private bedroom, 3/4 bath, full kitchen, generator, lots of storage area, auxiliary sleeping places for guests, and most importantly, air conditioning. It's not cheap, but since it's being rented out by a reasonable private party, I'm only paying about half what some agencies are charging for similar vehicles during the Burn.

At this point, I'm trying to line up either a roommate/traveling-partner to share expenses and space during the Burn, and the drive there and back...or at least someone to pick up along the way, preferably in Sacto or Reno, to chip in gas money. A few people have expressed interest, but nobody's made a solid commitment.

Of course, any of my Tribe.net pals will be most welcome to stop in at the RV during BM, grab a cold Tecate and maybe even chill out (literally) in the AC-cooled space. One restriction: NO SHOES in the vehicle, as I'm trying to keep the dust contamination to a minimum.

I have no idea whether I'll be part of an organized camp this year, but I'll keep everyone posted on details. See ya on the Playa!