I arrived home at Heartwood yesterday to find a mountain covered in smoke.

Apparently the N.California wildfires are pretty close and it is quite hazy 'round here.

I was very excited to begin a Thai Massage intensive today, but it looks like we are getting smoked out (not uncommon for Humboldt!)

So, the whole class is packing up and going to a hot springs in Ashland...... I'm a little bummed to be still on the road after all this time, but feeling pretty adventurous..... and come on, hot springs?!? I'm so there.

much love from the road!

this is a copy from a blog about my spiritual practice I keep on my website www.lingqidao.com

Judgement:

The various parmaitas for cultivating the Dharma are in essence the means to internal happiness.

This becomes more and more clear to me as I grow in my practice.

As the mind settles and awareness increases we cannot help but feel wounded when our actions “miss the mark”, or do not manifest the enlightened activity of a Buddha.

Recently I have come to a greater understanding of the teaching of the Bodhisattva Jesus - “Judge not, lest you be judged yourself”. To interpret this as referring to some sort of after death retribution is a good start perhaps (for it definitely takes into acount the law of Karma (causality), but only goes part way.

Walking through my life, and observing others I have recently come to experience very distinctly that when any kind of judgement arises, feelings of pain within my heart-mind arise simultaneously. This applies to friends, teachers, strangers, and any event arising in the consciousness. Perhaps a better - if more cumbersome - translation of the teachings might be “Judge not, because the energy of that mind activity only produces more suffering within the heart.”

In coming to greater acceptance of my teachers and taking them down off of pedestals, I have noticed that more of their beautiful human qualities shine through to me than ever before. In accepting the circumstances of my life, and the arisals of my mind in meditation; I observe that numinous beauty and peace are always present.

This does not do away with the need or desire for discriminating wisdom - as both Maitri (friendliness & love) and Prajna (wisdom) are among the paramitas and must be balanced. When we try to discriminate with our minds clouded in judgement (prejudice/ pre-judgement) our wisdom is obscured. When we first open to the present moment, often we will find that the right choice naturally arises - then we have the opportunity to utilize Virya (heroic determination). Our actions can arise from a place of clear-seeing with in us, and often produce sweeter fruits than actions based upon fear or desire.

Of the black sash testing was sparring.

there is something just gratifying about men hitting each other with fists, feet, and sticks.

I went in feeling pretty low about life, and tired (ok and nervous) - but had so much fun exchanging blows that I left feeling super-invigorated.

And i escaped with only two ripped up fingers and a sore jaw! (ok, ok, boys like to talk about their battle injuries too).

You are either withholding your love in fear or giving your deepest gifts. When it’s time to use the toilet, really time, all importance is reduced to the event.

Right now, and in every now-moment, you are either closing or opening. You are either stressfully waiting for something—more money, security, affection—or you are living from your deep heart, opening as the entire moment, and giving what you most deeply desire to give, without waiting.

If you are waiting for anything in order to live and love without holding back, then you suffer. Every moment is the most important moment of your life. No future time is better than now to let down your guard and love.

Everything you do right now ripples outward and affects everyone. Your posture can shine your heart or transmit anxiety. Your breath can radiate love or muddy the room in depression. Your glance can awaken joy. Your words can inspire freedom. Your every act can open hearts and minds.

Opening from heart to all, you live as a gift to all. In every moment, you are either opening or closing. Right now, you are choosing to open and give fully or you are waiting. How does your choice feel?

excerpt from Blue Truth -by David Deida

Spirit's instructions are not always pleasant. Nor are they by nature easy.

It's important to remember not to judge the validity of an intuition by these standards ;)

Traditionally upon entering priesthood, or monastic order, an individual was/is asked to take certain vows.

Commonly these are things like Poverty, Chastity, etc.

Monks like me have a hard time sometimes reconciling these with the worlds that we live in.

Today a new insight comes to me -
it is not that one renounces these things just for the sake of renouncing them.... it's that one is determined not to let anything stand in the way of God's Will (or the flow of the Tao... whatever).

It should be assumed that one being offered ordination is at a point of at least rudimentary ability to hear and understand that still small voice within, and have learned that the greatest happiness and success come from carrying out that Will (which is none other than one's highest Will).

When this is the case one puts aside questions of how one will get money, how one will procreate, whether one will live or die. The thought of failure is not unacceptable - it is just not even allowed to arise in the mind. This is when one has attained true discipline and concentration. She can rest on the knowledge that infinite power is backing her, and feel the great vigour that comes from unwavering devotion to an Ideal

This world is romancing me. All the spring flowers and their fragrances. The magic of airplane flight and families kissing in the baggage claim. The heartbreak of love moving on. The spark of love just beginning. The kindness of friends and strangers.

All of it seduces and calls out to me, it wants me to fall in love.... wants me to give it all up in one great surge of desperate longing.

Well, fuck... why not?