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I was actually surprised to find people here.
Well, love to you all. If you need me I'm on facebook.
So hours later, I'm sitting in a green room with my fellow performers. I'm rehearsing a new song. They rehearsing dances and shtick.
The show begins, it's wonderful. We're wonderful as Brass Farthing. The audiance is wonderful. And it's time to do my solo song. And I'm nervous, but the crowd makes me feel loved and they like it. I go backstage again to the stairs and watch more of the show. Holly blows me away performing. Then she blows me away being a loving human being. The same with Kelly. He takes me away for a while with his beautiful songs.
I go into the audience. There's love, compliments, they don't want me to go too far away. No pity. Just love.
More numbers by my friends and they're great. And I'm part of them. I'm one of them.
And I have friends. Real friends who love me. And it's good to see Bill and Tazz and Nicole and Aiyda and Pam and Misha and Heather and Brie and Cindy and Mark and Rory and Jenna and Lauri and..... it just goes on and on, too many to say and I'm warm and happy.
Then it's time to go and I say goodbye to Jessica and we hug and I want to stay there forever.
And then I go and the world is shiny. Without alcohol and without drugs. Just love, having good friends and being a performer and an artist.
So it was written on the blank page.
There was a while of peace here.
Watching a Kylie Minogue concert and making a present for Jessica.
I thought about how much I wanted to get stoned. I guess it will always be this way, just like a reformed alcoholic will always want a drink.
I was watching the pretty lights of the concert and I thought, I would probably like it even more if I were high.
But then there's this weird karma of being straight around people that are high. They're definitely not people that use it for artistic purposes and they seem SOOO stupid to me. It's just the "getting high" that excites them sooo much. Not what they experience while they're high and like I said, nothing constructive. Just rejoicing in smoking, tons of pot consumed into a bottomless pit, because they are never high enough and then after a couple of hours and a bout of munchies, they're "hella tired". Kinda like watching drunk cavemen too stupid to appreciate what they're drinking.
I'm sure some of it is sour grapes, but I remember having the same disdain for "dead end stoners" when I did partake.
Tried to replace it with alcohol lately, which I'm not very good at. Absinthe at Dicken's and some Pirate Sherry here at home.
A slight release from sobriety, but nothing creative or really fulfilling. And my stupid work schedule just doesn’t allow me to go on drunken binges. Too bad and probably for the best.
Oh, the bittersweet life of Daniel I. Briggs.
Then there's Christmas.
Not much to say about it. It's not really much except a mush of old religions and commercialized guilt trips.
People willing to do anything to be a good gift giver, but not necessarily a decent human being. Cie la vie.
Some nice things this year if I play the "what made me happy" game, but in general I have to agree with most that it sucked the giant donkey dick. Failed tries at relationships, the same old iron-knees, a shitty job that gives me some time I need but never enough money, a six month journey into sobriety that hasn’t made me any happier than being a party boy, little control over my life and I'm very disappointed the final realization of the Dogs In Doublets CD has been such a drop in the bucket, but I suppose it's not over yet. Still it's enough to make me want a serious career in baking rather than trying to be an artiste any longer.
Thoughts about next year? Jessica sent me a horoscope telling me I'll be able to move like lightening next year. Yay! I just hope I have the motivation and inspiration to back it up. Going to try for at least one artistic achievement per month, at least one improvement to my quality of life per month and at least one social event. I like being alone, but it does tend to retard me socially and cut down on my opportunities. A better job, more control, maybe back to the smoky muse, maybe not, a car, much more money, much more performing and somehow....a life I can be happy with for more than a minute at a time.
I told myself last night I would make my peace with the world for Christmas and be the considerate person I wish others were.
I'm somewhere in-between. Guess I'm too cantankerous to be a total gem and too nice to be a reckless asshole.
Oh well, just a couple of weeks and then I switch into high gear. See how I go, faster than an arrow from the tartars bow! Go Speed Racer, go!!!
Merry fucking Christmas everyone! Be nice to each other, stop slamming your fucking door and slow the fuck down!!!
How some people can think of themselves as good people yet they are inconsiderate, rude and only think of themselves.
And they don't have a fucking clue when the tables are turned on them. They cry and whine about how important their lives are and why do others treat them poorly or don't want to be around them.
Well, here's a big clue. You're an asshole and when you stop treating others like shit, they might stop treating you like the inconsiderate bitch you are.
Dinner with Paul and Denise at Spenger's Fresh Fish Grotto!
I like hope. Hope is shiny and uses your imagination to change the present.
Here's to the day that happy future isn't so far away
On sale now at Kunaki.com/Sales.asp
I look at Jessica and she said, "What's wrong?" I said I'd be right back and ran after "the girl" because, I mean I had just been thinking about her so strongly and there she was, so...
I found her with a group of friends on a mound of grass in the park. She was sitting with her twin sister, but when I got close to say HI, I couldn’t tell which twin was which and after a few moments, they kinda looked like the Olsen Twins or monkeys.
Then I woke up totally frustrated because I had seen _____ in my dream and.....
Wait a minute. I had to take a good 10 minutes of going through my current life to realize, this girl doesn’t exist. My dream brain says she does, but once I went through every girl I've dated and flirted with in the last year or so, she just doesn’t exist.
Bad and mysterious dream brain! To be able to believe sooo strongly someone is real who isn’t. Bad, bad dream brain!
That's all. (sigh)
Here's how to play.
First get a My Space account and be...say...over 50 and male.
You will receive a message from someone like Serena Brown (picture above)
Serina's profile says she is from London, Kentucky, England.
Her message says she is from Ireland, but lives in NYC.
She is both 30 and 37 and has already made friends with Charlie, a 44 year old Deerhunter from Carteret, North Carolina and his dog, Kellogg,
The object of the game is to get Serena to send you an invite to be your friend on My Space, because nothing's better than a friend!
Serena's goal is to get you to give her your yahoo e-mail addy and IM her on Yahoo messenger. From there she will court you with Bizzaro talk until you fall in love with her. Then she will tell you about her mother, who will get into a serious car accident and require your bank account for that life and death operation.
The conversation should go something like this:
Serena Brown: HelloHandsome,
How are you doing?am Serena Brown ,37years old,from new york.
well am a cool lady, nice looking, honest ,trustworthy , dont like games very serious in a relationship, want to be in committed dating with who wants ..me.
Am.. still looking for the right man,I'm looking for kind, honest, serious, respectful, intelligent, faithful, well-balanced, decent man with no bad habits, Gentleman who knows how to treat a Woman. Please, no head games and am looking for honest man to develop this relationship with ,who will take care of me to the ends of my life .hope to hear from you soon.All i want to know is that , can i trust you ,I would love to share my life with someone that i can be honest with and enjoy all that life has to offer with.
....I am ready to go extra miles if i found you honest,truthful and loving cuz i have somethings to tell you, but am email@example.com
You: Why do you talk like you don't speak english?
Serena Brown: I am so happy to hear back from you.. I want you to know that i am originally from ireland but based in the US. I live in Rochester ny now and i have been here for Years now... now i want to move on and be with the right man in my life cause am sick of been Lonely,i just need the right man in my life.. someone to spend the rest of my life with... Am not looking for someone to date but someone to spend the REST of my life with,All i need from you is just being sincere to me,make me feel secured,appreciate,love,care and being understanding,my life has been so boring and hope with someone who is ready to Love me for who i am now it's gonna change for the best.. I’m searching for a life partner. I want to find a man who enjoys the opportunity, adventure and comfort of a successful life and is willing to contribute to making it even better. I'm looking for a good looking man who compliments me, is sexually satisfying, smart, elegant, funny, adventurous and a joy to be around. And if you don't mind i will like to chat with you so that i can get to know you more better..Here is my Chat IM on yahoo serenabrown40 Pls you can add me to ur list so that will can get to chat on talk better...I will be looking forward to hear from you again..
You: Wow! You're so interesting being from Kentucky, England and Ireland at the same time. But.. to be my friend and perhaps my wife, you must officially ask to be my friend on My Space. I have lot's of money to spend for you so get on it right away. But only if you are trustworthy and will make the supreme lover of my life. Am waiting for you to reply.
Hello thanks for getting back to me i will really want us to have a chat so you can send me our yahoo eamil or you can add me to your list so we can there an get to know each other more better okay......
You: My heart is filled with joys to receive your replies. Just add me as your friend so you can fix my lonliness. I know now you are the light at the end of my tunnel and forever our love will live in NY, USA. Looking forward to hearing from you soon, yes?
At this point Serena gives up for the time being and focuses on Charlie who makes $30,000 to $45,000 a year and already corresponds with a nympho named Tink.
As you can see the games a draw, but was'nt that fun!??
'Til next time...Do svidaniya!
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