The Big Gay, Gay Camping Trip at Vantage!

Easy link : http://0bpm.com/vantage

Thursday 5/22 - Monday 5/26

FREE CAMPING!

Come for the whole time, or just a day stop on your way to Sasquatch Festival!

It's time for this year’s installment of the Big Gay, Gay Camping Trip. Camping, swimming, [redacted], [redacted], [redacted... twice], and fun!

A bunch of us are heading there Thursday evening and we will be there until sometime on Monday, weather permitting.

For those of you returning, we will be camped at the usual spot (depending on availability). No matter what, we won't venture far from the fence near the walkway to the big swimming area.

For you newbies, here are the directions, instructions, and demands that will get you there and get you through the weekend. G-d help us all..... G-d fucking help us all..... :(

Directions from Seattle (Sorry Eastern Suckahz!)

1. Take I-90 Eastbound
2. Take a right on WA-26 (after the big, long, hard, bridge over the Columbia)
3. Take a right on WA-243
4. Take a right on the dirt road just down a couple hundred feet or so (it will sneek up on you. RAWR!)
5. PARK MOTHAH FUCKAS!
6. Walk about 1 mile (yes, seriously, you'll feel like you may have gone too far, but you haven’t) straight back in the park. Thank G-d I've included a map for you to print if you want!
7. We will be camped near the fence. If you go through a fence, you've gone too far asshat. Turn around. Depending on availability we may have to camp away from our normal spot. We will be within a 50 yard distance or so. Look for teh gays. We will be there.

GOOGLEFIED MAP!



CLICK ME!

BEFORE you come to Vantage:

• Buy your booze. This park allows liquor, so stock the fuck up. Last thing you want to deal with at 5am when you want to continue partying with the frat guys experimenting with their sexuality,  is running out of your favorite drink, a Cozmo fu-fu-puffy-funk-pretty-titty-unf-unf. Don't be "That Guy" that doesn't have his preferred drink. Stock up.
• Buy your cigarettes. The closest cities are George, Kittitas, and Ellensburg. Miles and miles and miles and miles away. Once you drive forever to get to them you will find they don't have the cigarettes you want anyways! Fudge that! Just buy a freakin carton and have them ready. You can smoke your leftover packs when you get home from camping.
• Bring warm clothes, cold clothes, swimming trunks, beach blanket, leather restraints, sarongs, nipple clamps, sling, etc. The weather can be oven hot during the day and freezer cold in the evening. Don't get caught having to slut it up with some annoying douche just to share his sleeping bag or his extra hoodie. BE PREPARED! BE, BE PREPARED!
• Bring enough food and water to get through the weekend. "Experts" suggest 1 gallon of drinking water per day, per person and something like 2000 calories of nom nom noms. I know you're all watching your figure and drinking 1 cup of water and 200 calories a day, but bring more food just in case. We will force feed you that food when you pass out from malnutrition.
• Bring a tent, sleeping bag, toys, etc. You may be able to shack up with someone, but it’s better to be safe then sorry. Please be prepared to take care of yourself over the length of your stay.

• Put your garbage in a garbage sack. I (and others) will provide plenty of bags to dump your garbage in. THE RANGERS will even give us garbage bags. Utilize them!
• Your penalty for NOT utilizing the garbage sacks is THE RANGERS will blow air horns directly at your tent if they find loose garbage laying about (no, honestly, I am not fucking joking). I will be forced to cook up [random person who doesn't throw their shit away] and have an awesome [random person who doesn't throw their shit away] bacon and eggs breakfast. The rest of us will rejoice when you are gone. You will be cooked. I suck at cooking. Don't make a sucky cook be forced to cook your ass up and be served so dishonorably. This is your only warning.
• Do not throw your unopened beer cans in the fire. It isn't as cool as you would think. Someone discovered this interesting game last year. This year anyone who does this will automatically be volunteered as the sacrifice to [insert random G-d]. Your saving throw will be -10 against Kyle Prime - You will lose.
  
  
• Kyle Prime will be completely sauced this whole camping trip and does not want to babysit the chirren. That being said, know your limits. Kyle Prime will NOT want to turn in to Momma Kyle - those days are behind him... mostly...
• Play safe. DON'T forget your safety word!  (Mine is "5 fat females sitting sipping scotch on the seashore"... just so you know.  *wink*)

Last Year's Vantage Crew (minus some who left early)