Artist: Desmond Francis Purcell
Media: Paper, Felt Markers, Stickers
Date: January 22, 2007

Central to the work is a conflict involving a black cat on the first story of a Spanish style, tile-roofed house, shouting "Will you cut that out!" What is ambiguous, however, is the reason for the black cat's exclamation.

One's initial assumption might be that the ginger cat on the second story, who drops feces onto the floor, is the recipient of the black cat's outrage, and is being reprimanded for not using the litter box. It would be easy to reach this conclusion, particularly because the black cat on the first story appears to align himself with other well-behaved felines, including the ginger-and-white cat on the far left who has recently used the litter box like a good cat should and now finishes his business tidily. Also, the second story suggests a dark or even criminal element, as the Siamese on the top right is locked in a cage and the two black cats on the far left indulge in vain, possibly conspiratorial activities. Also note the green light fixtures exist only on the first floor, and there are no lights on the second floor.

When the artist was questioned, however, it was revealed that the black cat on the first story is actually unaware of any subversive activities occurring on the second floor, and is yelling at the ginger cat standing directly to his right. BUT WHY?

The artist has refused to discuss the piece any further.

I volunteered to dj the charity auction for my kids’ school this year, The Santa Rosa Charter School. This was my second year as volunteer dj. Last year was a Las Vegas theme. This year: Wild Wild West.

- - - - - - - - - -

It's Saturday afternoon, the day of the auction. I've had the borrowed dj equipment around for about three day. The guy who lent it calls himself Mark Oldies. I almost don't test the equipment out because I borrowed the same stuff from the same guy last year and it worked fine.

I decide to hook it up just to make sure I remember how all the connectors go together. I test it. The right speaker doesn't work!! I do some troubleshooting and discover a blown fuse. Aaaarggh!!! I spazz out. Jessica, bless her heart, drives down to Radio Shack and gets some fuses. I replace the burned out fuse. Everything works fine.

I load up the extremely heavy speakers, the mixer/amp, and the rest of the equipment into the car and drive to Sebastopol wearing my uncomfortable polyester cowboy tux that smells like mildew from the costume shop.

It's 6PM. I’m at the Sebastopol Community Center and I've just finished setting up. I'm already beat from the several trips from car to knotty pine stage, carrying the cumbersome equipment in too-large rented cowboy boots.

I set up and start playing music. Lots of people begin showing up, including a surprising number of older folks in western wear.

For the next four hours, I play a mix of mostly mid-century country & western, including Bob Wills, Buck Owens, Ernest Tubb, George Jones, Hank Williams, Johnny Cash, Loretta Lynn and Ray Price. For good measure I throw in some Slim Whitman, Wilf Carter, Tex Ritter, Tennessee Ernie Ford, Spade Cooley, Gene Autrey, as well as a little tex mex and some Morricone soundtrack music. I slip in a little Nick Lowe and his Cowboy Outfit, Knitters and Dave Edmunds and it all flows together nicely.

I begin to feel like a real dj when I’m able to accommodate requests for, “A Fool Such as I” by Hank Snow, “Walkin’ After Midnight” by Patsy Cline, and “Crazy Little Thing Called Love” by Dwight Yoakum (which is about as close to “new country” as I’m willing to get)

Now it's close to 10PM. Most of the older folks have gone home. AS outlined by the auction committee, it's time to break out of the western theme and play dance music. "It's Your Thing" by Isley Brothers. A couple of young chicks get out there right away start dancing. It breaks the ice for everyone else, and other people start dancing.

In the middle of "Shining Star" by Earth Wind & Fire, the amp blows a fuse. The crowd of 20 or so dancers goes "Awwwwwwwwww." I make a quick announcement that I'll fix it ASAP. I fix it. The music plays again. People dance again.

Now a 40-something woman in a Little House on the Prairie dress comes up and says, "You should be playing some blues. You know, Allman Brothers, Rolling Stones, Stevie Ray Vaughn." I tell her I'll see what I can do and she goes away.

Again, the amp blows a fuse. The crowd roars with frustration. The emcee makes an auction-related announcement, which gives me time to pop a backup CD into the community center's PA system. I play the pre-made mix I brought for just such an emergency. People dance again. Unfortunately, I can’t mix anymore at this point, but the sound over the PA is actually better than the antiquated setup I borrowed, so that’s a plus.

A drunk looking ruffian approaches me. He looks like he wants to kick my ass. He says, "I represent several folks here tonight who'd really like to hear some blues. You know, Stevie Ray Vaughn, Allman Brothers...".

I explain that the borrowed equipment blew up and that I have to rely on my pre-programmed backup CDs. The ruffian appears confused, then he retreats.

"Move Your Feet" by Junior/Senior elicits squeals of delight from two older lesbian couples. Yessss.

Prairie woman returns with a sweaty bald guy and she pretends to hold a gun to my head. "I'm going to have to shoot you for the music you're playing. What is this, just stuff YOU like?"

It's clear that most people like it, but Prairie woman seems oblivious to this. She glares at me. The sweaty bald guy glares at me. I give them the old "amp blew up" story. Eventually they go away.

Music is slated to end at precisely 11:30PM. At 11:29 "Boys and Girls" by Blur clears the dance floor. I'd had my doubts about playing that one, and I'm not sure if it’s the song or the fact that somebody announced a last-minute sale on $5 bottles of wine that gets everyone off the floor. It’s time to cut the music anyway, so the timing is actually perfect.

I pack up. A couple of people ask for my card. I printed one out just for the occasion, although I don’t own any dj equipment. I guess I’ll worry about that if anybody ever wants to hire me.

- - - - - - -

So, that was my night at the Wild West auction. The school made around $30,000 that night.