Hey, just to let you know...

If you're interested at all in The Demi, S/he is moving activities to Live Journal for a time, and mostly ignoring Tribe.

I'll be documenting/working through my Transitioning Gender, and also my Transition into the Sex Industry (and no, I'm not sure just what I'll be doing under that umbrella term yet. Working on getting modelling work...)

So, if you want to find me, i'm "demi-dysphoria" in LJ.

Pax.

Mmmm.... Well, really what do I say at this point?

The Three of Us have met at once, and it seemed immediately that our Energies would all work very nicely together. VERY Nicely.

I am having to move out of the place I'm in, and will be moving in with "V". This is for two major reasons 1) To Save Money while we plan on landing a Flat, likely in JP, to create a Full-Fledged Temple of Love (Babylon...)

Thee other, whom I will simply call Cat, is EXTREMELY keen on the idea. We had V visit us toward the end of a major ritual two nights ago, and it was apparent that in our seperate ways, we were an effective, balanced Trinity. All the Elements are right, the social dynamics, the Training...

Thee Reason # 2) V is my mentor in the profession I'm going into. I am not comfortable talking about it in any detail here, both because of the major censorship problems on Tribe now (damned if the vibe of this new shell isn't sterile, eh?), and because it is so Misunderstood by even Loving Magickal Community.

I am Becoming a "Sex Worker". This does not mean $$$ for Sex. "Sex Worker" is an Umbrella term used to help keep various sorts of "Sexual Service Providers" (i.e. Stripping, Erotic Dance, Porn and Erotica, Phone Sex, and, yes, includes Prostitution and "Escorte Services") Unified, so that they can not so easily be marginalized, jailed, abused or mistreated (which happens A LOT). I will admit that I am, and have been, focused on becoming a Performer in this arena, perhaps a Fetish performer (actual Sexual/Sensual Theater), probably an erotic dancer in a club (once I have a photo portfolio, I'm going to try and sell myself to Queer Clubs.), and, unexpectingly, am being Trained as a Domme.

Never thought that one would be in my realm, but, after seeing just a little, it feels like something I could really enjoy.

If any of you, my sweet people, wish to know in person the true nature of this "Tantric Faith", I will gladly speak to you in person, if I feel you can handle it. This Silence must End. Our mission in this world is to bring Sexual Healing, and as an Artist/Performer sort, I feel that Healthy, Loving and Mature (emotionally) Sensual Imagery is something the "Mass Culture" needs so badly. Its so easy to say "Porn is Bad, its so Degrading" and just leave it at that. Abstinence never works as a Philosophy. What we need are those Brave enough, and with Vision enough to Make "Sex Positive" Porn and Erotica, to bring Service with Love.

And don't scoff. We've been steadily gaining ground for sometime, and are really beginning to find success. Our Mission is Love, Love Eternal...

Final Missive: Met a One last night. Had met her at a Fetish Night. I will call her Daphne here. I have called her "Flower of Babylon".

Many of us in "The Work" I spoke of have been severely abused in life. We understand Pain, Damage and Compassion through having lived it. We actually really mostly only Heal the Sickest sort, and Human Sexuality, at large, is Quite Sick right now.

She, however, was untouched. She knows not what she is consciously, but lives it, breaths it. So Pure, and yet Not Pure. Unharmed, Untouched. She is what we would be, if times were not so harsh to us. An Inspiration...

And, that's where its at. Life will remain a challenge for me and my sort, but I am devoted to my Path(s), always have been. I no longer feel so "alone", I feel Loved.

And a Temple We Will Build.

~ evol d7e7m7i love ~

Get ready, this is going to be Quick, Blurry, and a Flurry of Sensual Imagery (I hope...)

Two-Four Years ago (hard to really pin down an exact date): "Initiated by Association" into the Paths of Faerie, and a Certain form of Tantra, which will remain Nameless for now. Not well known, and really hard to explain, so, assume it to be an interesting, high-impact form of Tantra.

The "Cell" I was involved in Dissapated (Interpersonnel Magickal Attack), most of the members moved off in a Thousand Directions, and after a short time, I convince myself that I know nothing about anything that happened, to avoid Crushing Despair.

Second Half of Last Year: I move into the Boston Area (from Western MA, a rather inhospitable area for a Sensuous Trannsexual Artist-sort) having glimpsed the reality of Loving Magickal Community. A few who had come to Love me held me up until I could land a room.

Somewhere in this, the memories of what I'd Lived start trickling back in. By the time I get the room, I'm already focused on creating a "Temple to Love, Light and Darkness", and set about doing so, rather succesfully for someone who only knew what-was-what from seeing it.

December: Plans to Create a "Collaborative Concurrence" Temple/Art Collective come crashing down, along with multiple aspects of my Life. Accepted as "Being Smacked Upside the Head", for Hubris.

Move inside self, Begin Casting and Calling to "Thee Lady of Bablyon", whilst developing worship of "Thee Holy Hermaphrodite". Healing...

New Years: During Creation of a "UnSeelye" Faerie Costume (I'll get photos up soon enough), the Urge for a spontaneous Love Ritual overtakes me. I proceed to build up more Spirit-Sex Energy in one release than I may have ever at that point. Scream a Certain same of the Lady in Orgasm. Noticed something seems to have "Worked"...

The Night before, Met someone (whom we will call "V" here) that I had discussed my lineage with in somewhat veiled terms while helping out a little at "The Temple in the Hood", for prep. Plans to speak more frankly are suggested.

The Very Night, at That Very Place (in the same room even), meet a VERY Notably Powerful Practitioner of the afforementioned Tantric Faith. I am Claimed. Over the course of the next two days, we communicate all we know to eachother, 75% of which occurs in the Astral Realms. Sense of "Downloading and Uploading" energy and information is strong. After two days have passed, I agree to be Initiated into "The American Nath Society", a splinter of an Pre-Historically Ancient Tantric Lineage, "Nath Sampradaya", little known outside of India.

Over the Course of the next two Weeks, Magickal Training, Experience and Engagement Proceeds at a nearly Overwhelming Pace. Contrasts of Sensuous Beauty, and Demonic Attacks are severe. I prove my ability to engage and deal with this, mostly to myself, but also to my newfound peers. Co-ordinated efforts to knock me from my path are constant, by some-things from my Karmic Past. I do not falter.

Past week or so: Begin Casting Heavily in Faerie. The UnSeelye are summoned, whom I have discovered I am one of. I have always known that they were not just "those bad Faeries", and I call them to me, Teaching them again of Love, and Healing thier wounds where possible. Consequently, discover the beginnings of my abiltity to Heal (very specific sort.)

"V" returns. A Powerful UnSeelye Sister. Also another Practitioner of this Tantric Path. We Hold Council. We Exchange deep secrets. We also Synch Up.

* end reel, switch to next reel to finish movie *

Well, so, found out my Macintosh Is THOUROUGHLY Fragged. I'll be able to Copy the Hard Drive, Which Contains FUCKLOADS of Music (much of which is VITAL to my Daily Function.), but, SHE IS NO MORE.

Spent Much of the Day in Self Reflection, and got Some Healing Work Done by a Friend named Valerie. Learned a LOT about my Energy Blockages, and taught her the basics of SIGIL Work. Good Exchange...

...and DANCING! I went to Thee Haven for the First time in a WHILE, and, By Being Open and Kind, Despite the Snitty Fear Many Goths have in Public, I Became OPEN to Thee Greater Ecstasy of it all. Anytime I can Feel Beautiful, Feel as a Walking, Dancing Orgasm Incarnate (as in my little photo I use to Represent me), I AM DIVINE.

Years of Pain and Struggle, just to get the Friggin' Hormones. They Put Me through SO Much, and all along, I was ALWAYS right about it. When I can Dance, Knowing that The Women Around Me can SEE THEMSELVES in my Painted Face, Eyes Open to Slits, Darkly Painted Lips Parted Oh-So-Eloquently, It ALMOST makes Everything PERFECT. Now, if they'd just TAKE ME more Frequently... I see the looks they give me...

...Though, there is ONE Strong Woman, who was Brave Enough. We Shall See How She Turns Out on Thursday Night...

Ah, Damn. My Laptop's Screen is Fragged. I'm Going to Get It Fixed A.S.A.P. but, Expect me to Dissappear for a Bit.

This'll Give Me a Chance to Concentrate on Non-Digital Projects for a While... I'll check Here on Occasion, but, Don't Message Me Unless You want to Visit, or Get Some Business/Creation Done...

LOVE ~ Demi ~