Goin' home

Its going to be hard leaving Baltimore. This city has been very good to me. I have made some wonderful friends here. Last night was my going away party and the gathered group was phenomenal. But going back to New Orleans does feel like going home. It is a completion of the full circle of the Katrina exodus. I did things in Baltimore I could never do in NOLA and these experiences will be foundational as I set up the school and my projects down there.

Off to Berlin

My "July abroad" this year is to Berlin. I have rented an apartment and have connected with old and new friends with whom I will visit. I look forward to great culture, naked in the parks, long stroll and beer (and bear) gardens.

A news feature on my program

Here is another news story on my arts program at Mercy Hospital

www.wbaltv.com/womansdoct...detail.html

Why does the heart open?

I had an experience last night that seemed to touch the deep core of existence, at least for me in this life. I had not been meeting men for a number of weeks, having grown tired of the quick zipless fucks with no real connection. I don't know why I got on line last night. I wasn't particularly horny or needing company. I connected with a guy who I had never seen on line before in the unusual "What's up, man?" manner. Nothing special. We arranged for him to come by. Nothing special. He arrived and DAMN but my heart just opened. I could fell it instantaneously even before we fell into bed. Our physical dance all came from a place in me that was not centered on my genitals and it was not linear or narrative but it sent me into that zone of timelessness and pure REAL NAKED encounter. He was completely participating in this and seemed to love it but, he wasn't there like I was. There was nothing special for him. Yes, he was a good lover, but it didn't send him over any edges. I was a good lover too, but was having an overwhelming ego shattering experience.

We came down slowly and began to talk. And talked for the next two hours curled up with each other and we shared much intimacy and I heard his life and tried to share mine but he wasn't all that interested. He had already started to withdraw and move to the next scene in this comedy of life. I think he knew that something had touched me very deeply and though he enjoyed that I had giving myself to him and the experience so fully, I think he wanted to make sure there were "no strings attached." He was a rambling man. He was kind but it was clear I would never see him again. So, why does the heart open?

Afterwards I had this incredible feeling of longing and humility and tearful gratitude and I felt open to God in the way I most treasure. There was both a fullness in me and an emptiness. There was both an acute sense of my limitedness and a sense of my eternal boundless nature. Our physical heating up of the soul was a preparation for this, perhaps consummation with God. Because maybe there is only God. And all of us are merely the psychopomps to the one real encounter. The man left and I doubt if he was blown over as I was. He probably went home and went to bed and didn't give me or our encounter another thought. He functioned as some kind of angel for me and I am learning this strange lesson in life that the best human couplings lead to raw exposure to the Divine. Its sad for me because I also want the enclosed human circuit of love. I want the emptiness to be filled with a lover so that we circulate our energies between us, but I am being taught that this life is not about that but is about some intense openings and emptying out which then allow Spirit to reside. Its not my choice but its also the most wonderful thing I have ever experienced.

My Lagniappe Project Featured on the 5:00 News here in Baltimore

Here is a link to the interview with the Lagniappe artist who works with cancer patients at Mercy Hospital.
www.wbaltv.com/womansdoct...detail.html

I may be going back

This Thursday I go back to New Orleans for my yearly teaching gig at the school I started there, The New Orleans Lyceum. It is doing really well, has its own building and a large mailing list. I am seriously considering moving back and resuming leadership of the school. Katrina interrupted a rich, full life down there and a very successful school, which I have not been able to establish here. There is something about that place, its dysfunction, its humor , its craziness and my dear friends who have weathered the recover that draws my back there on a soul level. I am doing an archetypal amplification workshop on the nature of desire through the story of the Sirens using yoga and art, a philo-cafe on the philosophical aspects of projections, a film discussion on "The Life of David Gale," and a screening of the film on Sabina Spielrein who Jung slept with, who then moved on the Freud - shown at the psychoanalytic center. We will also do a lot of eating, drinking, dancing listening to great music and even a voudou ceremony in the Quarter...Gawd, I miss that place!

I'm in a weird space

This painting by the Norwegian, Od Nordrum, captures the way I have been feeling lately. My projects and vision and aspirations have been drying up and I feel I am in the wasteland. I am empty but not in a good "fertile void" or "center of being" way but more of a needy, fill me up sort of ennui. There is a lack of initiative, creativity, energy for social engagement so I am prone to internet fantasy and living in the simulacra. I know that is too is part of the human condition. A psychic friend told me that in her networks many people who had previously been quite active in transformational work are experiencing this deterioration of what had worked before and that nothing has taken hold yet to reform the new work. She says that is because the old forms are quickly disappearing and some of us have not invested very much in the old forms and so we are the first to feel the emptying out. It makes sense to me. My supereGO says GO GO GO, do more, fill that void with productive selfless service. But another part of me says, suffer (the root of passion) through this dark night, for acting now will only be acting for the wrong reasons. (thank you T. S. Eliot). So, I wait and wonder as I wander....

Palestinian blood is on US.

Remember: The Palestinian people are Semitic, so supporting their rights against the barbarism of the Israelis is actually supporting Semitic causes. Its been way overdue that the knee jerk reaction of "Anti-semitic" for any criticism of Israeli's injustices (which all the human rights organizations have clearly revealed) be ignored and laughed at as just another ploy to keep Amerika in some kind of trance about who is ultimately responsible for this. Do any of you seriously think Israel actually produces enough funds to pay for its arsenal? Its all American money. This is the big secret that no one wants to face - Israel is totally dependent on the US tax payers money. Israel's actions against Arab countries puts us at the greatest risk of terrorist attacks - much more than all the airport security issues or issues with immigrants. This is the big secret. If the US government was serious about reducing the threat of terrorism to this country they would completely revise their stance on Israel. But when we unconditionally support Israel bombing the shit out of the Lebanese, the Palestinians and doing nothing to stop it as the world watches in horror, of course the Arab world hates us. The Arab world knows that the only way to force us to revise our view of Israel is to go to the source of its support - the USA and you and I. So we are implicated in this up to our eyeballs. Its a shame its through terrorism. But they basically get ignored as more and more illegal Israeli settlements get set up on Palestinian lands. Israel would love the Palestinians to just settle down and behave so they can slowly take over the entire region. I completely understand these freedom fighters cause. I don't endorse terrorism but I do affirm that there is a good reason for it. Long Standing injustice and oppression which we do nothing to address.

Israel is such a humane and just country! And its all because of US backing!

More than 1,100 Palestinians have been killed since the war began on Dec. 27, including 346 children, according to the U.N. and Gaza health officials. The death toll rose by three dozen on Friday, including 25 people whose bodies were unearthed from rubble, Gaza health officials said.

Thirteen Israelis have been killed, four by rocket fire, according to the military.

It happened in Lebanon and we did nothing. Are we ever going to wake up!

And, of course, you heard about Israel's bombing of mosques, hospitals and UN schools. What a great people!

When is America going to wake up - Israel is the problem

Israel's aggressive and brutal policies have been dictating American foreign policies and put the American people at risk for further terrorist action against our country. The world and the Muslim world rightly sees that whatever destructive and invasive action taken by Israel is fully endorse, supported, financed by the United States. We could easily stop Israel from driving the Middle East to the desperate means they are going to through simply not paying for all those weapons of mass destruction. The power to bring peace to the middle east is in our hands. We don't really want peace there.

WASHINGTON – President George W. Bush rejected a plea from Israel last year to help it raid Iran's main nuclear complex, opting instead to authorize a new U.S. covert action aimed at sabotaging Iran's suspected nuclear weapons program, The New York Times reported.
Israel's request was for specialized bunker-busting bombs that it wanted for an attack that tentatively involved flying over Iraq to reach Iran's major nuclear complex at Natanz, where the country's only known uranium enrichment plant is located, the Times reported Saturday in its online edition. The White House deflected requests for the bombs and flyover but said it would improve intelligence-sharing with Israel on covert U.S. efforts to sabotage Iran's nuclear program.
The covert efforts, which began in early 2008, involved plans to penetrate Iran's nuclear supply chain abroad and undermine electrical systems and other networks on which Iran relies, the Times said, citing interviews with current and former U.S. officials, outside experts and international nuclear inspectors who spoke on condition of anonymity. The covert program will be handed off to President-elect Barack Obama, who will deciding whether to continue it.

Things changed in South Africa. Things can change in Israel too but we need to not ignore our part in sanctioning the oppression of the Palestinian people.