My Blog

Creating Creation Transforming Transformation --a rant

euonym — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 03:44:12 GMT

A constant flux In flux Well said; A Journey with no end An eventual outcome of normalacy We all die We all live What is the question of the inbetween? They are all here; Behind me Over me In front :Questions A small percentage of answers My 10% brain cannot hand the infinite outcomes of a live time of choice I ask my self how? my only is answer is: nothing Nothing as the subject of nothing THe space in between each thoughtout (less?) synapse fire THe space where myself is only self I have been there TOday I cry for their loss Today I am sad for the moments that are so beautiful and then fade into distant memories THe friends who disappear The love that is forgotten and fades Life that slowly drains away.. This blackness is killing me.. Where did the sunshine go?

ANd the out Pour

euonym — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 06:42:06 GMT

She's Inside All of Us ------------------------- As withiin so with out The emptiness is our home A womb to bear, Intimacy and laughter, A mother's love, Truth, So far beyond our minds our souls cry to be Heard over the distraction An earth To Birth Fearless warriors An oath taken to save their souls Head first Feet last Never a moment forgotten Released to the past Forwarded to the future Only ever present in presence and grace

Let your light SHINE! ....(before or after) The Intentions of an evening in White.

euonym — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 06:27:37 GMT

Journeying into Light ------------------------------------ I sit here in the most beautiful dreamlike world even before the dream has begun. Beginning to wake my heart feels full of tears, no sorrows, only bliss... Look at these people. SO many...different..all seeking the forgotten pieces of self. Song, praise..only for the Light. THIS is family. THIS is community. The breeze is soft, a light hand caressing my heart. The sky is a brilliant blue covered by the cloudlike forms of a dozens feathered angel wings. This is where I come from and where I shall go tonight to illuminate the light eminating from my heart. I love you, Ashley..may you be happy and free. I see you. You are safe here in this world. Safe to release the bonds of your illusionary self and to shine your light in all of its vunerability. Trust in the Light. It will always shine. I will always shine. I wish to see my light, the essence of the authentic woman I am and who I am becoming. I intend to embody this body, to be present with this soul and at peace with this mind.....for ALL pieces of myself to integrate in a complete glowing orb of love for both my being and all of those around me. Releasing judgements and ego, yet seeing the balance of fire and water. ZION Home.--to find shelter, spaciousness, peace and clarity within myself and the faith I have in the divinity of the universe....my purpose for this life time. WHITE White Pure CLEAN Fresh ALigned NurtuRe Womb Momma tRee Embrace myself, my life, and my mission to serve...

Humbug...

euonym — Sat, 26 Jul 2008 04:19:06 GMT

The woes and throws of this exsistence, racing back and forth from one edge to the next. Sometimes I think I am crazy?? The woman coordinating the meditation retreat asked me if I had ever been diagnosed "bi-polar"??! Haven't we all? I mean, yes, does that disqualify me? ------------------ ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! (a scream in comic book language) So tried of traversing alone or under the impairment of believing the illusion of loneliness.. I WANT: (2--- xmas wishlist) 1. Friends that stop by and have tea with me on a whim 2.Friends that stop by and have tea with me on a whim 3.Friends that stop by and have tea with me on a whim 4.Friends that stop by and have tea with me on a whim 5.Friends that stop by and have tea with me on a whim ....thats it. oh! and a few good snuggle buddies to go along with that , stocking stuffers of course..

Life Written in MaGiK MArker....

euonym — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 05:06:16 GMT

By Yours TRULY ----------------------------- Settling... The final breath of spaciousness My body falls supported on invisible wings Angels sent to remind me of my own divinity THese young ones make me want... Screaming my once voiceless exsistance onto brilliantly watercolored sidewalks All marked with the handprints of laughter from other realms My spirit is full an light A princesses dream ...a knight An awakened kiss These times. This time Innocence. A love that can never be, yet is eternally fullfilled. You are a piece I have forgotten The goldenchild who daywalk through my dreams The meadow barren Full of a summer's love; hung within the branches of an old oak tree pressed into a dusty diary of forgotten songs. Romance. Fallen lore. A graceful dance, intertwined in a moonlight of stars You are so far beyond me, a complexiety of characteristics I have fallen. With no arms to catch me, will you be there? How can I even begin to detangle this emotion? An apprehension of an unfullfilled past A death. Disentangle. That FUCKING smile Those brilliant eyes I wish upon you 1,000 True Loves and a life time of joy Though we may never fullfill our dream I will be a witness for yours... --- Dedicated to those wanted ones that could never be except in the dusty daylight of dreaming...

The Letters of L.O.V.E

euonym — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 04:51:34 GMT

An ode to the the re-emeergence of a heart left behind... ------------------------------------------------- Love... an interesting concept, so symbiotic with "Attachment"; not a similarity I choose to exsist in this reality. LOVE is a 4-letter word- to love- in love- love. So many permutations of the same symbolism; Letters turned into sound and into manifest... A mother's love, faith, lover, friend, soul mate, passion, food, stillness, peace of mind. All the same. Is it a whom do we love or a what do we love? The when we love is not always given by choice, though the reminder to "Be" love is constant...to allow love. Self-love To transcend this "love" of attachement and jealousy into a trust in the divine, love and faith in HUMANITY and this abundant earth. How to transform these old patterns? ...truth.... ....expression.... = FREEDOM Pure self-love, nurturing, acceptance Total and complete, only found through living our passion and settling our minds. Free to surrender to the silence. A desiring mind? Wanting mind. Always needing more than enough.... a human condition, To make a choice to see through the diffusness of the concept; To look past the objective human experience of love and see through to the underlying want for connection and family, community.. To transcend that further into the ideology of complete true love and connection exsisting in EVERY PRESENT MOMENT. You have to be in your body to recieve this transmission, to be here now, present in order to feel the sweet breeze on your skin and the salt in the air. Intimacy The truest love SIlence, the illusion of loneliness Her earth beneath our feet Her fingers in our hair Her beauty our eyes behold It is all right here in this moment.. THe past and future melt away leaving stories behind and possibilities endless.

The reccapp. Lighting in a Bottle 2008

euonym — Wed, 28 May 2008 05:19:53 GMT

Wow...what an event, what a transformation, what a family!!! I have left this event.., each year, with a deep transformation of my psyche. I dont know if words can even describe the events that took place... Complete love and acceptance. The feeling of being me. The feeling of family. The feeling of being comfortable in my own skin. RAIN and COLD. An awful stomach bug cured by emotional release. TRUST. Nurturing. Finding my reflection in human form, beautiful and alive yet not without his own scars. Feeling "in love"....I remember it now. Release. Fully expressed. Divine energy. Divine guidance. THe beginning of me and the end of me. I am left breathless yet full of life. Vital yet calmly so. Expressed and grounded. Fed. Until next time

a little ditty

euonym — Wed, 21 May 2008 05:12:34 GMT

Something little i wrote ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; Devoid of stars I am the night sky, A black hole, Creator and Destroyer of life.... I am GOD and in that place, I am nothing; unbeknowst to you, that is the meaning of everything....

Nourishment

euonym — Wed, 21 May 2008 05:07:54 GMT

So much growth, continuously.... will I ever understand this is a constant river? there is no end in sight, let alone one to reach for. THis is the kind of river that you laze about it, floating around, trusting the flow, whistling a melody and picking shapes out of the clouds... my ideal life. T>R>U>S>T A question was posed to me today... what do I need to make my life nourishing? What do "I" need? so here is my attempt at a list.... I need.... Deep friendships i.e. people who understand me and all of my pecularities, people whom I get to spend one on one time with,laugh with, fall asleep with my head on their lap, people I can fully trust. My family. Intimacy (the last thing for me to admit) --ok, so yes, I am finally getting I was not actually born on Jupiter and am not a part of the asexual clan of android nuns but, alas, I am human and crave sensation, whether it be a shoulder to cry on or a hand to hold, a friend to hug, or a lover to love, i cannot turn my body off. Friend Time - all of the time. Tea time and pool party time. Hiking time and dinner times. Ice cream times and piggy back times. Laughing times and challenging times. People nourish me. People I can make laugh and those that remind me of how silly my head is and the things my mind tells me. Reflections. Everyday. Creation Expression - Artistic expression a.k.a emotional expression. I want to paint and make silly little hats. Draw and find that space in my creative process where I am so absorbed in the action , nothing else matters. That blank space where there is no thought of tomorrow only of the intense visual manifestion that is being birthed into the world through my hands. FULFILLMENT! Purpose - THere is no life for me here, if I do not have a purpose for others. I must find my way to give. my way to love, my way to care outside of me. This is the ONLY REASON I stay here. THis is the only reason I have strived to survive so long. I know I can help. Quiet time - Me time, bath time. Writing in my journal time and contemplating the human psyche time. Watching the rain fall and listening to the beauty of a summer storm. Time to meditate and do yoga. Talk to god and send my blessings to all those in need. Connection with Spirit - So vital..the current that carries me. I must remember this everyday because it is so easy to get swept away by this reality and the things that pretend to be . Momma and Poppa. The higher spirit within me. The one who loves me even when I make decisions that are destructive. The one who reminds me why I am on this earth when I run to her feet and beg her to take me home. Carry me. Inspiration - Beauty and skill.. the little things that make me want to work my ass (literally sometimes). Those damn people on their bikes cruising up and down the mountains and those other people in their aerial silks flying like birds. Fabulous people creating beautiful art on canvas others with their bodies and others with their minds. All a piece of the puzzle I want to be a part of. I am a part of. I think I misplaced the piece. oops ---- cut to the chase. I am still searching. seeking to see the path that I am on. to understand that I am here exactly where I am. i pray to have the courage and strength to see beyond me so that I a may live and be a light for others..

Theta Faerie Land or "A Walk in the Woods"

euonym — Wed, 14 May 2008 05:59:05 GMT

There is magic here..now within these walls of illusion Spitting forth a gentle fearosity of disbelief. "I believe in faeries" Have you opened your heart wide enough to actually see? She painted this picture; Alive Perfect in every sense, Each texture Each pattern Each child... Have you silenced you mind enough to believe? I just saw 3 hawks hovering above me sending me a message to look beyond this morality; A big picture picture.. "How can i help?" Have you slowed down enough to notice? Soar high with ease and grace, trust bring the hayward for flight. This seed in front of me grows a tail of life. A tiny reminder of just how ALIVE we are. All of those rememberances are our only passwords beyond our minds. Make BELIEVE. Its all a silly little game. God was not an old man nor a wizened woman, but a child.. the most powerful creator of all; without judgement without resentment without disbelief, not yet secured in the matrix of the mind. She paints her pictures; a practice of joy and creativity. There are no confines of what the picture needs to look like , rarley a direction.. Simple finger strokes in brilliant luminescant paint patterns created our reality. We are nothing more, nothing less, than a child's fridgerator magnet masterpiece. There is constant change as space on this intergalactic freezer fills up and some need to be taken down. stop. A break of nectar A bareback pony ride A moment to lie in the grass, sleep in the sun. She is all we have forgotten to be; Light Spontaneity Motion without commotion Still Innocent Magical.... Take a moment to step outside, Take of your shoes and feel freedom, Skip a little, Laugh a lot, Call your friends to join.... Play this game with the right set of rules What do you win? An innocence lost Your childhood found I believe in faeries.. Do you?

a red moon.

euonym — Thu, 21 Feb 2008 05:55:05 GMT

A brilliant night sky. The moon is covered in a soft burnt glow, pixie dust from Mars. Our world turns inside out in this moment...shifting. The little boxes of our minds are processing overloadso that we may once again count...1,2,3 and be satisfied. I see myself in this moon this might Softly veiled from a peaks view Is she dying? Fading away? No, merely magic invisible to the eye; millions of faeries, pixies, warrior queens and guru wanderers cast there magic upwards beginning a transformation that will be seen only through the fate yet to come... A hint of what was, will never be the same again. Our moon has been cleansed by the blood of 10,000 angels, only a pinprick each. We will never be the same. Back in the womb a pulsating heart beat fills my ears we are still here, in the momma's belly attached only through sensations Who are we to weep? We are the dreamers of the dream.

LUNAR ECLISPE WED 7PM!!! Picses-Virgo

euonym — Tue, 19 Feb 2008 21:03:10 GMT

"The polarity of this Full Moon is Pisces-Virgo. The struggle inherent in this opposition is between paying attention to the details that help you make necessary discriminations and analyze the external world ~ or~ going with the flow of your spiritual inner world; the tension between being an idealist or being a practical realist. Pay careful attention to the small details and intoxication levels if you want to come out the other end of this tunnel. Balancing too far on the side of details can make you feel spiritually empty, lost, and emotionally bankrupt. Focusing too much on the spiritual side can make you too spacey to notice important obstacles and potential problems. It's possible to use your spiritual capabilities for sincere world service." ---------------- Oh My Oh My This is my opposition in life. The moon playing out my pisces sun and virgo moon chart. I have always wondered my I feel like 2 different people, One who i so gracefully connected with mother earth and flows with childlike innocence and the other that is a multi tasking speed demon that cannot focus and is a constant questioning of "why"? If you want to understand me....read above:> A blessing and a curse.

the storm

euonym — Wed, 13 Feb 2008 07:48:54 GMT

This life is a game I don't want to play. As i continue to bear witness to the mass exodus of souls beginning to take place on our planet, I wonder if I want to join them. There is still so much sorrow in my heart, even after all of the healing work I have been through. When the day is done, work is over and my passions left unfulfilled , I have no energy left to investigate my heart or soul. All of the q and a that boggle my already overwhelmed out of balancece vata mind; waht am i grateful for, what is joy, breathe, ground yourself, one two three, one two three; om nama shivaya, laugh, scream.... Too many choices! Anxiety about the amount of ways to calm down ,, that is a laughable conundrum:> The millions of judgements that fill my little brain and f lood into my open and vunnerable heart. i keep it shut off as best as I can , ,but how can i when you all are so beautiful to me? Judgements and guilt. Women are weak, he says. How his words still stab my in the back? Only because i make them mean.. i am weak. How silly? How disappointed will my family/friends be if they know I am not doing so well...arent we all supposed to be happy light creatures, giggling everyday and drinking nectar? Will they think less of me? I am ALMOST beyond caring. Maybe that is the point of all of this ..breakdown to humilty. ahhh..well I am riding with the tide my dear extended creatures and familiars. Through an extreme storm right now. We will see if I am alive in the morning mist. If i make to shelter and fire before the next gale. A part of me wants to be there . Wants to help to so badly. She is screaming please MOTHER shwo me HOW TO H ELP! I am so tired of sitting in my little litter box and scratching my head. ..and the other part is so fucking over this pointless drama.

So tired..

euonym — Sat, 29 Dec 2007 07:15:43 GMT

I am tired Tired before I have even begun Jaded and full before I starred in their show SOmetimes I wish i could trade in this consciousness for a piece of bacon and a laz-e boy recliner Alas the evolution of the soul has moved too far beyond Sometimes all of this gets overwhleming the aches the pains the emotional distress adrenal glands firing and whatever other neural synapis going haywire I feel like a little lost robot who has contracted a sudden yet deadly case of terets.. after multiping the 5th root of pie by the subatomic energy fusion of a nucleous +2 no COMPUTE!! I say If I can create whatever I want, you say... THEN! I Create.......... Everythingcomingtoahalting STOP right now so i can FUCKing Breathe for a minute or possibly 2 Maybe i will play badmitton for a moment while sipping a cup of tea and TAKING AS LONG AS I WOULD LIKE TO FINISH MY .......salad.. May I have sprouts with that, dressing on the side...of course IS that little old lady coming out of me before her time? ///the one who wears a tin foil hat and has no teeth, does not leave her house, and swears--they are ALWAYS listening. censor censor when is the last time I can rememeber feeling comfortable in my own skin? I can barely remember yesterday let alone what it would feel like to let all the breathe out of my lungs , to not hold in my stomach, to wear a simple cotton dress and no shoes going out to play with friends, to be rocked back and forth by my mother while I cry for the sadness of the world I have yet begun to experience.. I do declare and I have decided today that others judgement does not suit me, as someone close to me would say ITS NOT MY PROBLEM I am done being a part of this ridiculous fashion show I am that I am and thats all that there is )Sticking my tongue out and waggling my hands behind my ears) YOU!! Voices in my head...go stick it somewhere the sun dont shine I have decided that I am perfect today. THE END

WHo me?

euonym — Sat, 13 Oct 2007 09:38:34 GMT

I have looked through my photos billions of times; stayed up aimles hours wandering around the images I have saved that depict this person, ash. it has become almost an obsession; finding images of myself--hoping that one will bear resemblance to me, hoping that one will make me feel at home in this shell. Still I find myself here, at this screen, at 2 am in the morning for the 4th night in a row staring at my face made up of a million tiny pixels. ...what was that thought? these simple shapes give way to life by the meaning they are given. Who i am beneathe those shapes needs to make sense before the shape will emerge as familiar. Sometimes I wish i could erase the shape and start over. i feel old, beyond and a little worn down from the chattering in my head. I am at the point of wanting to vanish completley into a speck of dust, to float in the air and watch over those people I love. I knew this would happen. Its crazy to me that even though I am alive and healthy today;living a life so much different that 4 months ago...I am still unsure. WEll.. i guess its not that hard to believe. 12 years since 13. hmmm..all these ridiculous stories later, I have quite an amount of growing to do int he next year. A WARNING to all those around me; I will be making mistakes; almost like a child at points I am sure; BUT I will be authentic enough to get clear about them....be on my ass about it. I am ready to grow fast and strong, condense 12 years of adolsence into 1 year of adulthood. PHEWwwww... More than ever I want to be able to see myself as authentically ...me. I want to see a picture of me, not judge or become the perfectionist voice but love me in every guise and REALLY really get ..yes..that face is mine. Its a bizarre feeling to be so out of touch at times, I do not even comprehend my own physical body. So much to learn about life after you have hid for so long. Be gentle with me please. Guide me loving to the next greater step and please help me to enjoy this one. MANIFESTATIONS of 2008 ---------------------------------------- 1. Bodily Awareness and Connectivity 2. Cover of Yoga Magazine 3. ED Memoirs/Journals Transcribed/Book Thought out 4. Yoga yoga yoga--partner yoga 5. Winter Music Conference Miami 6. Millinery design & Fabrication 7. Retrain aerial fabric 8. Modeling portfolio updated 9. THrow a fabulous event/fashion show/culture mixup 10. pick a few things and go with em...

Tulip

euonym — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 11:29:36 GMT

When you said tulips I knew that you're mine When I caught you there Crying in the night Wearing my jacket Wearing that smile I knew that I'd found you This could be an opportunity Were you unawares Did it catch you out? Or did it break you in Right from the start It's as pure as fire It's as pure as snow I knew that I'd found you This could be an opportunity If you promise to let it grow 'Cos you're the one I love Look it up...makes me feel every time Bloc Party-- Tulip (remixed by Evil Nine)

Hide and Seek

euonym — Mon, 24 Sep 2007 17:44:27 GMT

I am the being I saw on the other side. The line was so thick, inpenetrable in reality.s sense I believed in something beyond me but only me I believed in a dream only I could create I had no idea how but could only keep moving toward the edge of light I had no idea what i was looking for not the reasons i searched so long. But i knew....somehow i knew. I didnt know what i didnt know TRUST. I trusted, slowly.I started with the people i loved...letting go of the ego of self Being forced through that reust to come to terms with all of my dark veils. I had no choice other that to fight, to keep trying , to move forward. Death or light Always seeking something I did not quite understand....Light. I searched for th "answers", teachers, a way to make it end Twelve years long. a lifetime. never categorized as wasted. always learning. Then comes the day, i do not evn recall the date The day something in me emerged The day I was reborn from the ashes The day i saw light and began to live It has been three months since that day. Why it happened then, the specifc change is a mystery Every door i have opened has been one more key, one more unlocked veil to the passage of my soul I can only reminisce the whys and the amazing whos that have pushed me to seek and follow this path I am so thankful that i have traveled. I am on the other side of that line.. no longer looking across or through the past is done I have been transformed I have been rebirthed a humble warrior of light THere are no more battles to fight. There is only trust and surrender, with every sense that is won. With the story I created behind me, I catch myself looking into the distance for the next step...what else do i need to learn? Why not stay right here for a moment. Presence. The journey, the road, the path i have just traveled has been long and difficult. i need to rest I need to laugh. I need to shout and cry my gratefufullness to my own existence,; to the Mother, to the Father, to all the peoople who have created reflections of me to grow from...you know who you are I am alive I AM ALIVE!! I trusted i believed i dreamed And I FUCKING MADE IT HERE! Side note I love you Ashley, beyond form, beyond the day to day. I promise to take care of you in every moment. i promise to remember the goddess withiin and i promise you will never be alone. Let me guide you. Allow me to hold your hand. Breathe. Deep. Let Go The game is over. You have found the light.

Transformation...the ashes to phoenix

euonym — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 08:25:15 GMT

Written Aug 10th 2007 from my eyes only She is a beautiful, peaceful warrior; a chameleon of many colors yet always true to herself , inside as she is outside. Happy, joyful, full of smiles/giggles and self-conidence. A playful, at ease creature who glides through life with abundance, inspiring those around her and gaining respect with each action. Her words are meaningful, her actions carried out with deliberations and grace. A lightly blowing breeze from the sweet sultry ocean. Her exsistence fills the gaps. Knowledgeable and able to convey that wisdom to others. She is a muse, a teacher, a lover and a friend; a student of soularity. Her talents are limitless and her ego unrefined. Her body is peaceful, her mind quite...still. She has the ability to relax, let go, to reflect in the blink of an eye. Her breath is full bodied and her spirit unencunbered. She reaches/stretches her arms and light to the sky while her feet remain firmly planted on the ground. Taller and taller she grows, as balance between extremes is learned and rememebered. Self disciplined. She knows what she needs and knows what she wants. It is easily aquired and freely given. She is in direct connection with the Universe and savors each communication with Mother Spirit, both in listening and conversation practices (mediation and prayer). Life is a ceremony. Thanks is given and help asked for. Her mind is calm, her heart open and her soul clear and vibrant. Her energy is boundless, her friends and lovers..plentiful. All is Divine All is simple She is at peace

Wise Words From Faraway Friend....thank you James

euonym — Wed, 04 Jul 2007 05:30:25 GMT

From the highest of peaks climaxes reached to the lowly lulls screeching with dullness, desperation, and despair. There we are between it all In the air that our temples share from raging river to mystic waterfall, to the call of the falcon heard from a room with no view and a lonely balcony beckoning for anyone to pay attention to its imperfect paint job and rotten flower pots. To the Alchemy of the Soul and the marvelous ability to sculpt, co create, edit, break free and bloom once more in the gorgeous realization of Life as a gift. To go beyond hours and clocking in, to shedded skin, to choosing the best medicine of allowing grace to shower down upon our innocent selves reminding us of our Elvin lifetimes, just the right rhymes to wash the sour taste out of the mouth. Oh so on it, like oober doober super sonic.. full of doubt, lacking confidence, pouting cause its easier than really being face to face with our projected reflections that bounce around the room and get consumed by entertaining the Thought of change. Some would say the rain is sad and gloomy, others pray for it dancing euphorically to every drop as it nourishes the crops cause well.... its all that they got, i guess its all in how you look at it, like a book addict who is always trying to find someone else to cover the shift and is the first one to call the kettle black just cause there own spout isn't working. Is it worth it? How high is the value and who sets it anyways, how many rays of the Sun does it take to make our cells happy and sometimes i just want to lick the moon and prove to myself that it all can be done. Completely spun strung out on the strings of a guitar that never weeps and always plays my favorite song. No right, no wrong, a lifelong process of accomplishing that which we chose to overcome. So sober Im drunk. So confused that Im crystal clear as these words eternally echo upon the eardrums of the divine. Fearlessly flying throughout the milky way, lately actin so crazy ive made myself sane... hope this open soul source flow of poetree helps to heal, aimin to release and relieve all the pain.

THE Love THe Pain

euonym — Fri, 18 May 2007 22:11:50 GMT

If i could scream right now I would If i could tear out my fucking heart I would I fi could disappear right now I would If i could never feel love again i would If I could leave this place forever I would

The Word of the Day...Ease

euonym — Wed, 16 May 2007 05:22:22 GMT

I have found myself within a new practice.. I choose every morning to "be" something; to be love, to be grateful, to by joy and as the days goes on I remind myself of these choices by inpsiring others to "become" that reinforcement. ....a little about it.. Life was never meant to hurt. It was never meant to be painful or tense. Life in our physically human form was given to us to ecperience pleasure. Bodily pleasure. So our souls could act out their intense love. Life is ease. Everything flows like a crystal clear stream down a mountains path and into a never ending lake of gratitude and accomplishment. You just take baby steps. Step by step, breathing all the way, remembering the river flowing through the land out into the sea; so silent so full of life and momentum; a clear path cut into the earth. Learn from nature.

Courage

euonym — Wed, 31 Jan 2007 00:11:53 GMT

Fun, smiling, laughing, letting go letting them roll of your back passionate about life and humanity curiousity killed the cat An luminous old soul my best friend my lover Someone who trusts in me and I can trust completely We grow seperate and apart We grow together We listen to each other's hearts communicate beyond words gestures eyes touch Some who chooses to listen and learn from me who teaches me in a patient loving way Someone who says kind things everyday just to make me smile because they beleive it is true "you are beautiful" Someone who catches my tears and puts them in a mason jar so i will never need to cry again Someone who is present RIGHT NOW and loves himself respects his life and listens to his soul He allows himself to learn from his mistakes to push past the here and now and into the why? enlightenment another space and time time for space and peace of mind He loves music, dance, performance playing silly games, rolling in the snow, running through sprinklers, being free He is level-headed and creates reality from his dreams skillfully soulful He touches me softly and brushes the tears away laughing at my silliness, holding me close acknowledging my sadness and fear allowing me to do the same for him makes me feel like I can fly like i am a bird in the wind He wants me to be happy and allows me to live my life and acknowledges my importance in his We are a team we work together to make each other stronger faster at peace sillier positive reinforcement We are always looking for adventures knowing that our futures are what we dream them to be knnowing what we say, think and feel creates those futures always say beautiful things. He shares his feelings, his fears, his dreams, his soul completely, He appreciates the depths to which my feelings can go my words my emotions He knows when to let go when to give me a hig when to stay by my side and when i need some space He does not need to be in control He does not anger easily peaceful sometimes stubborn but always willing to talk He does not walk away ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- It is funny when someone is lost. Someone you love. Someone who you always knew you would have to give up. The bodymind can seperate so far from the soul. The ego that walks the walk but cannot seem to talk the talk. ....sometimes his soul will sit with me, will be there when I am deep inside my self. He smiles at me and laughs, crystal clear eyes and no sadness in his spirit. I am grateful I had the chance to see his physicalself and spirit align, if only for a moment when we met. I pray that he is strong enough to wrestle his ego to the ground so that his spirit will decide to realign in his heart.

Love

euonym — Thu, 11 Jan 2007 19:48:29 GMT

Spinning in the sun and Laughing really really hard I need to be told Brave Words I need Myself I need my Voice I a need a Partner who will Giggle and Cherish me to my Bones! I need real real REAL GENUINESS and I need Strenght: Strength to trust and LET DOWN the ropes and the storyline I need honest Dinner Time talking I need loving Gestures and LOTS! of drawing on the floor I need to be met Halfway I need to feel Needed I need to Surrender I need to FEEL HEARD I need NOT to be mocked when I am being TRUE I need REAL kindness and a LOVE that glows brightly.... ----------------------------------------------------- In love I can become tangles In love I become a girl wanting to be a woman I become a schemer and a planner and a day by day announcer In love I am not a still pond or a smooth flying bird I can clench, prepare and predict I want the love in my life to feel like a deep breaaaaathhhhhhhhheeee, a blushing laugh, a view across the sea Always expanding wider, glowing in love we need just the true we need those those wide kind eyes of understanding We need tumbling play We need to show up--to open; to tell the sweet raw, here it is We need to show the pjs before the ballgown Tell your love --Sabrina Harrison

Love Fest 2006

euonym — Mon, 18 Sep 2006 20:18:23 GMT

For all those I know and all those I do not (whom are not reading this anyway), I am coming to San Fran this to perform with Vau De Vire Society. FYI

A Little Lost A little Rant

euonym — Tue, 22 Aug 2006 18:57:40 GMT

I can tell myself everything I need to know But Do I really Listen? Listen. Breathe. Create. Laugh. Inspire. "Life is not about Finding Yourself but Creating Yourself" What am i creating? What character do i want to play?--it can always change, no choice has to be "forever" '"Coincidence Is Always An Answer to Questions We Have Asked" My Dreams make me who I am --A dreamer- a Pisces---What do they look like? ---Colorful, peaceful; a watercolor painting texturized through time. Scarred yet praised for its marks.