So - last Saturday found me driving West to Chapel Hill to attend Paul's Birthday party. . . I could write more about the great music, good food, grand friends. . . but I think the pictures really, well, "tell the story" - - - yep, the last few shots were taken by others, as I'd had too much burbon and decided to nap. here's the link to my photos on Flickr:

www.flickr.com/photos/320...3824655027/

Oh, and just for the record, it’s a “vintage” tux shirt, it’s not a pirate shirt – although I can talk like a pirate if I have to – “argh!”

It's cold cold cold outside. . . and I'm soooooooo wishing for summer. and getting naked and running in the tall grass. . . I thought I'd post my recipe for Mojitos -- they always make me think of nice warm days and the sun warming up my naked butt.

Mojito
(Mojito pronounced 'mo-he-toe')
1.5 oz Rum
1 stalk of fresh mint* from the garden (with leaves)
1 oz simple syrup**
1/2 lime
about 7 oz club soda

The mojito is the Cuban cousin to the traditional American and oh-so-Southern mint julep. Long has it been considered a classic cocktail in its native country, where Ernest Hemingway is said to have enjoyed more than one or two of the minty-fresh rum drinks. It is the coolest of the cool summer drinks. I build the cocktail as follows:

In a tall clear glass muddle the mint stalk, using a bartender’s muddle or pestle, (or in a pinch the back of a wooden spoon). Take care to crush the stalk only (releasing the essential oils of the mint) take care that the leaves remain as much in-tact as possible (this makes for a prettier cocktail and prevents small flakes of mint from floating to the surface of the cocktail and adhering to one’s teeth – which can give you a really un-sexy look, and guarantee that the cute boy at the party won’t give you a second look, as you’ll look like an old troll with green stuff on his teeth – but I digress. . . ).

Build the cocktail by putting crushed ice in on top of the crushed mint, pour in the rum, the simple syrup**, and squeeze in the juice from half a lime (I like to drop the squeezed lime half into the glass as well – I found some nifty hand-held lime squeezers at World Market but if you're really butch, you can squeeze the lime by hand). Top it off by filling the remainder of the glass with club soda. Gently stir before serving. You won’t need any additional garnish because the mint and the lime finish off the look so well in a tall clear glass – but a bright red or pink drinking straw can complete the visual pleasure of the cocktail. You can adjust you portions based on your tastes – I like more soda in my glass and less simple syrup – but folks who like a sweeter cocktail will like an extra little hit of simple syrup.

**Purists will tell you that the Cuban yerbabuena mint is the only mint to use in a mojito. But I’ve enjoyed playing around with a variety of mints that can be grown in NC. Spearmint, chocolate mint, and pineapple mint are some of my favorites. Mint is easy to grow and it’s fun to have a mojito party to celebrate a successful garden! – Note, if you do grow it, you may want to grow it in a sunken container or a raised garden, as some varieties can be very invasive and crowd out other plants in your garden.

**Simple syrup is easy to make. You’ll need water, sugar, and a stove. Heat about 2 cups of water to just about boiling (small bubbles beginning to rise and break) – keep the water from achieving a full rolling boil. Begin adding the sugar, slowly, stirring constantly. As the sugar dissolves, add more, until you’ve added about the same amount of sugar as water. Remove from heat and cool. You can make simple syrup up to 2 weeks in advance and store it in the refrigerator. I keep mine in plastic water bottles with squeeze tops. During the summer months you always want to have some simple syrup in the fridge. You never know when a mojito party might break out!!!

I love words. I love the visuals arts, painting, drawing, sculpting, etc. But I have a special fondness for the art of written and spoken words. I love poetry, story telling, comedy, jokes, stories, novels.

Recently, while listening to “Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me,” (my favorite radio program of all time – broadcasting on a public radio station near you), I heard an interview with James Lipton. You may know of Mr. Lipton as the host of the TV show, *Inside The Actors Studio* – a show for which Mr. Lipton is often parodied and spoofed, because, well, he can come off as a bit of a pompous soul. That said, Mr. Lipton is quite funny, and really knows how to turn a phrase. And it was revealed on this broadcast that Mr. Lipton is the author of *An Exaltation of Larks*. For the uninitiated, this book was published in 1968 and has not gone out of print since. It is the most comprehensive collection of “collective nouns” – (also known as “group terms,” “company terms,” “nouns of assemblage,” and Mr. Lipton’s favorite, “terms of venery”).

I was reminded of the parlor game my mother and I used to play when I was a child -we’d attempt to match wits with who knew the largest list of collective nouns. At the time, resources where scarce for reference and research: the encyclopedia, the dictionary, and The Book of Lists (which was housed in the main bathroom of our house). I did not know then of Mr. Lipton’s book (and there was no internet). I was delighted when my Amazon.com order, (containing Mr. Lipton’s book), arrived just prior to Christmas. I’ve greatly enjoyed learning about the history of these terms – and having my attention drawn to another facet of how clever and poetic our English language can be. There’s more that I could say about collective nouns – I really, I highly recommend you run right out and get a copy of Lipton’s book. I think it’s an approachable and a fun read.

So how do these group nouns come into being? As with most of the English Language, what wasn’t borrowed or co-opted from other earlier languages – someone, somewhere, used the term, and it got repeated, and it fell into popular practice. Obviously, some nouns of assemblage have fallen out of use – and some are used today without giving much thought (“school of fish,” “pride of lions,” etc.). As new terms or groups have come into being – there are not any collective terms for them, as the habit of categorizing groups as such isn’t currently much in fashion. I think this is a shame. So, I’m offering some new collective nouns, that reflect some of my recent loves and groups. These need not be the last word – others may have some thoughts, and want to offer additional choices and suggestions. But I thought this would be a good forum to get this started. So here they are:

* An Escapade of Hoopers

* A Flamboyance of Burners

* A Vicissitude of Radical Faeries

* A Nuance of Drag Queens

* An Oblation of Pagans

A yellowed five by three index card
Stained and brittle
Pulled from a green metal recipe box
Catapults me back to my childhood
And Thanksgivings and Christmases past

The recipe is from that era of regrettable food
When marketers made their way into our kitchens
And “convenience” replaced time honored traditions
And yet, here it is, a recipe handed down
From one generation to the next

The writing is in my mother’s hand
(Is it really twelve years she’s been gone?)
But the recipe itself, is from my father’s mother
As is indicated after the title
And within parentheses, “Pauline Z.” it reads

I’m back in the kitchen, with my mother
Learning to cook, and prepare the "festival meal"
Learning to bring some ingredients to room temperature
Chilling some and boiling others
It is one part chemistry and many parts magic

And in-turn, as the years pass, it is I
Showing a younger sibling how to smash
Cream cheese with the back of a fork
How whip cream and drain pineapple
And the importance of reserving the juice – as it WILL be needed later

Did anyone ever really like this dish?
I remember everyone always politely taking some
But like mysterious loaves and fishes
It always seemed there was more at the end than at the start
Leftovers to haunt us for days upon days

And here I am sitting on the floor of my kitchen
Tears welling in my eyes
Feeling the loss of my mother - as though the hurt is new
And longing for Thanksgivings and Christmases past
And contemplating making myself some Lime Frost Salad

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lime Frost Salad (Pauline Z.)
1 pkg. lime jell-o
1 3oz. pkg. cream cheese
1 small can crushed pineapple
½ pt. heavy cream
1 c. boiling water

To jell-o add water + the liquid from pineapple + enough cold water to make 1 c.
Place in refrig. Allow to begin jelling;
then add pineapple, cream (whipped), + cheese
(mashed w/ fork after having been left @ room Temp.)
Return to refrig. Yield: 4-6 servings.

You stir, and pull my arms tighter around you, and inch back into me.
I am already awake, studying each hair on the back of your head.
You stir again, and whisper “what time is it?” to the pillow, or the gods, or me.
I am the one who answers, “almost eight, we have a little more time.”
You sigh, and pull me tighter still.
I press into you, my lips now on your neck, my nose now in your hair.
You relax, your breathing grows again heavy, and you slip back into unconsciousness.
We have a little more time.
We have only a little more time.

Hooping in the house
Lovely twirling overhead
The lamp is no longer

Awakened by, what, a sound?
Or a shift in mood, emotion?
Regardless, I’m awake and
Immediately know what’s transpired

The mornings I’ve awakened such
From my heavy slumber
And sexy dreams, erection not yet faded
To find a frightened, frantic bird
Raging, railing against some widow

"Out" is on the other side
And out is what it wants
But something unseen, hard, incomprehensible
Blocks its frenzied way

And there they are, there on the floor – looking up
The two perpetrators, the grey one and the ginger
Wide eyed and wild looking, having reverted
From purring housecats to primitive predatory things
Tigers on the parquet

They are twitching and anxious and waiting
For exhaustion to over take the object of their interest
Now that the advantage of surprise is gone
Exhaustion and patience are their strategy

Thusnelda, the grey, is skilled as cats go
Quiet, fast, and precise despite her weight
She can surgically remove flying things from the air
And swimming things from the water
She lacks however the knowledge or the desire to make the kill

She prefers to bring her prizes home
Through the pet door, alive and panicked
Inside she eventually loses her grip – a catch and release program
The ginger, Tony, has lost speed with his advancing years
But he’s not lost the knowledge or the will to deliver a fatal bite

Together they are a lethal pair

But not this morning

In spite of my groggy state
I’ve skill and agility of my own – with broom in one hand
I trap the bird between drapes and window and broom
And gently grab it with my free hand
Out on the deck, in the morning light, I see the color for the first time
Iridescent, blue, a bluebird

I release it – and after an almost imperceptible pause, it’s gone - fast
It does not look back at me, naked and cold on the deck
No “thank you” is called back at me
No chirp of appreciation
And back in the house I deliver an admonishment
“You bad cats” I say, as I scoop dry food into their bowls
“No bird for you today”

One of my favorite comic characters of all time is Catwoman – arch nemesis of Batman. Admittedly I came to Catwoman through the camp 1960s era TV show. But have enjoyed many iterations of her in print and broadcast media. Five actresses have played Catwoman in live actions releases – and I think it’s interesting to get people’s take on who their favorite is. My dear Tribe friends, I’d like to know: “who is your favorite Catwoman? And why? Please answer in the comments section below. . .

A) Julie Newmar originated the role in 1966 on the TV series and played the part for 14 episodes.

B) Lee Meriwether played the part in the 1966 theatrical release based on the TV show (when Newmar was unavailable).

C) Eartha Kitt was the 3rd season replacement and played the part for 3 episodes.

D) Michelle Pfeiffer was Catwoman in the 1992 theatrical release: Batman Returns.

E) Halle Berry played the title role in the 2004 film Catwoman.

Yup. I'm a geek.