I have watch the youtube updates on Japan and world future
The stress of packing up water and supplies has hept me up for weeks.

The lose of a loved one was devistating.
the estranged family has finished the funeral ritual as I mourn alone.

then I put the 2 realities together and feel such compassion for so many who do not even know who is alive or gone in Japan
let alone no closure. and I am sending the universe all my heart, shifting from self to others.

what can I do? i saw an add for workers to go help. and wish i had a passport, but i do not even have the health to travel, let alone do a job. although I would be fine with getting sick from helping them. I can only pray, as we all can and sending love an dlight is very powerful.


i do not know the reason tribe has lost activity, but i was in shelters for a while wihout much internet. let alone privacy.
now settling down with pals in lllinois, i try to go to college, but feel so unmotivated to do assignments.
they say I could get gpa 3.9 but i just drag, like pulling teeth.

how do i find my lust for life again. to find passion again?