So, lately I've been trying to find hobbies/past times to enjoy; to relax and forget how miserable I am right now with work. Something for myself, that doesn't feel like work, or unnecessary anxiety. I was invited to a Pampered Chef party and fell in love with...products. I witnessed the stoneware oval roasting pan with lid and thought, "I WANT ONE OF THOSE"...complete with the kitchen glove mittens. I bought the bamboo salt/pepper grinders and garlic press that you don't have to peel the garlic glove, and I was on fire. I found something that I got *excited* about, that was fun, and easy, and validating.

Then I decided to have a catalog party. No party at my house, but a chance to "earn" more Pampered Chef...I mean, come on!

Now I'm anxious and feeling pressured...I almost want to just buy the remaining $60 to my half price hostess discount. Fuck it, they won't ever know.

See...clusterfuck !@#$@@$$!