glob of nicole

bloody numbers!

hot_damn — Fri, 19 Dec 2008 04:50:28 GMT

math nerd tattoo

hot_damn — Mon, 15 Dec 2008 00:11:04 GMT

This is my next tattoo- what do you think? I'm picturing a bracelet style on my wrist. Please give me your comments now, before I get it printed forever on my body. References: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/E_(mathematical_constant) http://press.princeton.edu/titles/5342.html

we fucked up

hot_damn — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 05:13:29 GMT

Look, folks, when it came to opposing prop 8 we fucked up. Blame the mormon church, blame the voters who believed their lies, whatever. We really should be looking hard at the message we sent. I've been doing a comprehensive search for anti-prop 8 ads, and I've been horrified by what I find. The vast majority of the ads feature snarky 30-somethings making ads that would only appeal to themselves. How could the movement think that insulting, derisive and divisive ads could carry their message to swing voters? Ads like this: http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/cca5e8a78a/protect-marriage-protect-children-prohibit-divorce-from-jonathan-smith, in which white-backgrounded liberals fling the words of prop 8 voters back at them, in a context the voters never intended, does not make friends. It makes enemies. Here's how the ads need to go: <Suburban living room, floral wallpaper, precious moments figurines on the shelves. On doilies. On the plush couch, an African-American, 60-year-old woman in conservative dress- a good Christian woman.> G.C.W. "I raised my family to have good values- to be honest, to be loving, to be true to the teachings of Christ." <cue montage of family photo's from the 70's and 80's> G.C.W. "So when my youngest son, Peter, told me he was gay... I was devastated. I prayed it was just a phase. I wanted my son to get married, to have children, to live a faithful life. I felt like all my dreams for him were shattered." <cue close-up on a photo of Peter and his mother> G.C.W. "But a few years ago, Peter brought Chris to dinner with the family. When I saw them together, I couldn't help but see the love and support they showed each other. I saw my child truly happy for the first time in his life." <cue a picture of the family attending church together. see Chris putting his arm around G.C.W. and smiling at Peter. > G.C.W. " Still, I worried that their love was sinful, so I went to see my pastor. My pastor knew Peter since he was born, and had met Chris just that Christmas. He told me "Mildred, in the eyes of Jesus your child is perfect. Christ preached for us to love each other, and to Judge not lest ye be judged."." "Well... after that I let go of my wish that Peter would marry a nice girl, and accepted that he would marry a nice boy. And you know what? Their wedding was beautiful. They were married in Chris' Unitarian Church, and received all the counseling and support my own church would have given them." <Shift to darker music, flash to a pro-prop 8 protest crowd. emphasize their anger and intolerance in the photo spread. possibly visually tie their angry protest to anti-civil-rights protests.> G.C.W. "But now my child's family is threatened, and by the very people who claim to follow Christ. I might have understood their argument, years ago, but now I understand that we have to embrace our differences to truly support Christian families. Please support my family, and my child. Please vote no on Prop 8." <end> There were some decent ads, like the ones my sweetie sent me today: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l6dBUCi32c8 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kawF7cfRRy0 But the main thing those ads fail to do is validate the fear people feel about having a gay family member. That fear has to be validated in order to change people's minds. That's why the ads should focus on people who have changed their minds after a family member came out, not on people who have always believed gay marriage is fine. And the ads should have targeted African-American families, who were notoriously in favor of prop 8. So that's my rant. We did it wrong. We must do it better next time.

not at all fair and balanced

hot_damn — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 01:30:13 GMT

I am so very anxious about tomorrow. I'm anxious about voter suppression, corporate voting machine fraud, and the possibility that I may not get what I want out of this election. I generally consider it wise to give some credit to all political points of view, and allow for the possibility that I am not all-knowing. By that standard I am decidedly unwise in this election. I'm intellectually, morally, emotionally invested in defeating the right wing. I know that prop 8 is wrong the way I know that the sky is blue. I feel as strongly that McCain is corrupt, self-serving and dangerous. I'm angry with people who disagree with me on these two issues. I'm even having a hard time with folks who are questioning prop K, though I grant that it's a more confusing issue. And that worries me. Am I becoming a narrow-minded partisan? What does it mean that I find the opposition unfathomable and infuriating? Or maybe there's a simpler explanation for my worry: maybe all my anxieties must contain a thread of self-doubt in order to satisfy my perverse little brain. gah! I just want tomorrow to be over so I can implement the appropriate coping mechanisms already!

sexual tension

hot_damn — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 07:10:45 GMT

I've decided that there's an unsupportable amount of sexual tension between my cats. This is troublesome, as they haven't the genitals necessary for the alleviation of said tension. Instead, they're whiny, hypervigilant, and overly concerned with kitty treats. That is all.

AIDS Walk SF

hot_damn — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 00:00:57 GMT

I've just this minute registered for the San Francisco AIDS Walk on the 20th! Please, if you are able, contribute to the cause via my donation page: http://aidswalksanfrancisco2008.kintera.org/nicolejohnson The program I'll be working for at my new job is going to receive a lot of funding from the AIDS walk- my ED sent out this announcement: "A Woman’s Place (AWP) is one of 8 programs of Community Awareness & Treatment Services, a private non-profit serving homeless adults in the City and County of San Francisco. AWP offers a wide spectrum of services including emergency shelter and transitional housing to chronically homeless women with multiple problems including HIV+/AIDS. AWP is the only gender specific facility of its kind in San Francisco offering a safe haven for San Francisco’s most vulnerable women. Your contribution to the AIDS Walk will contribute towards the support of the HIV+/AIDS program at AWP. This special program offers transitional housing with intensive services including case management, benefits advocacy, and money management to women with HIV+/AIDS. During their stay, there is a special focus on linking women to primary medical care and mental health services, as well as educating them on HIV+/AIDS treatment options and the effects of drugs and alcohol on disease progression. Another major emphasis of the program is preparing the women for entrance into permanent housing once they complete the program. Your support of this unique and critical program during a time of shrinking funding is appreciated."

My New Job

hot_damn — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 22:36:06 GMT

I've just been promoted in my agency, to another program called A Woman's Place. It's a shelter, recovery center, transitional housing program, mental health stabilization center, and transgender/HIV+ program. I'll be a Program Coordinator, with a lot more pay and a lot more responsibility than I have now. The program is also way more chaotic than I'm used to- my sedate homeless seniors facility has been almost relaxing by comparison. Here's hoping it works out!

housesitting and real estate

hot_damn — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 22:55:01 GMT

Hey Folks! Dan and I are going camping over the 4th and are looking for a housesitter/catsitter. We strongly prefer someone who can stay at our apartment and give our cats some TLC in addition to food. Compensation is generous and dates are flexible - email me for details. If you have a friend who you'd recommend, please feel free to forward this to them. Also, the apartment adjacent to ours (and nearly identical to ours) is for sale! If you're in the market for a 2-bedroom 1-bath condo in the mission, or know a cool person who is, let us know! The house has 4 units and everyone who lives there is awesome. This unit shares a back deck with ours, so we're hoping one of our friends will move in there.

4th of Juplaya

hot_damn — Fri, 30 May 2008 23:09:32 GMT

Who is going to juplaya this year? I just realized it's just over a month away.

Scottosaurus

hot_damn — Tue, 27 May 2008 01:05:27 GMT

My friend Scottosaurus died this morning. I wrote about him here, earlier: http://people.tribe.net/hot_damn/blog/f9e2c30d-4f3c-4b3c-9811-fb35230eacba You will be missed, Mr. O'Saurus.

another tattoo?

hot_damn — Fri, 23 May 2008 22:42:57 GMT

It seems all I ever blog about these days are my current and future tattoos. I'm not sure where to get this one, though. Wrist? Nape? Shoulder? hm... Where's the best place for a transcendental number?

Mordake this Friday

hot_damn — Mon, 19 May 2008 19:18:05 GMT

I've got my ticket for Mordake this Friday- who else is going that particular night? Maybe we can meet up!

My surprise day

hot_damn — Sun, 18 May 2008 02:05:24 GMT

Last week Dan told me to block off today for a mystery date. He was absolutely secretive and I've been dying of curiosity all week. This morning Dan was up with the sun but I slept in, and we went to a leisurely brunch. After a brief stop at Sports Basement for a windbreaker Dan whisked me to Spa Vitale, where we had a delicious rooftop "bathing ritual" (http://www.hotelvitale.com/gallery/photogalleryd4a1.html?navigation=spavitale&id=34 ). There was fresh fruit (yum, strawberries in the bath!), rose petals on the linens, rooibos tea, and little bells to ding for an attendant. I felt like a little kid in a grown-up's bath, I alternated between giggling and sighing with delight. After the bath we had a most excellent and thorough side-by-side massage. It was so calming to hear Dan's slow breathing and the occasional murmur of his massage therapist while I was being worked on. I enjoyed having us together in the room even more than I thought I would. We had lunch on the waterfront: Salmon steak and asparagus for me and fish and chips for Dan. Then we spent an hour on the water cruising the bay. (http://datn.org/post/35167738). We had to practice tourist-dodging, but it was so so worth it. We saw the most lovely acrobatic sail surfing on the windy water. I couldn't believe the heroic leaps of the surfers- it simply has to be seen. As I write, Dan's off to get some aloe vera gel for our sun-kissed faces and then we're having dinner at the Slow Club. This day has been *exactly* what I needed. I've been feeling so stressed and tense, I can hardly say why. But I have spent all day laughing and smiling and canoodling with my sweetie and I feel like a million bucks! I love my dear darling Dan- he's the man of my dreams. Thank you, baby!

least fun sedatives ever

hot_damn — Wed, 14 May 2008 18:07:26 GMT

From the Washington Post: "The U.S. government has injected hundreds of foreigners it has deported with dangerous psychotropic drugs against their will to keep them sedated during the trip back to their home country, according to medical records, internal documents and interviews with people who have been drugged." The drugs used are called anti-psychotics (or neuroleptics) and are the most toxc class of psychoactive medications. They have a horrific side-effect profile. Let's go with the 'drugging people against their will when they pose no threat is wrong-wrong-wrong' theory, but if you must sedate someone give them a little morphine! It's way safer. http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/nation/specials/immigration/cwc_d4p1.html

Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Undead

hot_damn — Wed, 07 May 2008 20:16:28 GMT

I will be wherever this film opens. I must be there. http://undeadflick.com/

I may be a big cornball, but...

hot_damn — Sun, 04 May 2008 23:46:47 GMT

This made my day, anyhow. http://www.metacafe.com/watch/1287124/best_wedding_toast_ever_amys_song/

We can all chill out

hot_damn — Sun, 04 May 2008 23:22:28 GMT

About whether this primary election is damaging the political landscape for progressives: http://www.brendan-nyhan.com/blog/2008/03/the-1968-analog.html I've been pondering this while Republicans describe the Democratic candidates as "bloodied-up" and such.

I feel like a clever cat

hot_damn — Fri, 25 Apr 2008 05:15:34 GMT

I feel like I know things worth teaching. And that's a really good feeling.

So I can feel proud, and never ashamed.

hot_damn — Mon, 14 Apr 2008 20:25:22 GMT

I just got an email that I'm up on wdydwyd this week! http://www.wdydwyd.com/

glorious day

hot_damn — Sun, 13 Apr 2008 07:32:14 GMT

I've been feeling idly in the mood to play video games lately, especially old video games long since forgotten by healthier minds than my own. It occurred to me to research playing Cliff Johnson games online, but my search was to no avail. Instead, I'm running a MacOS 6.0.7 emulator inside a windows emulator inside Kubuntu on my thinkpad. All so I can play... you guessed it! 3 in Three. Rejoice. Incidentally, the package I installed comes with lemmings. Does anyone remember lemmings? Save them from falling to their gory deaths, if you can!

The Emperor's New Call Girls

hot_damn — Wed, 12 Mar 2008 17:44:53 GMT

It's quite a tizzy, this scandal over Eliot Spitzer and the call girls of the Emperor's Club. I don't know much about this club, but generally speaking call girls with fancy websites have much more control over their destiny than poor women hookin on the corners. Generally speaking, they're not enslaved to pimps who abuse them and keep them in controlled poverty. They're much more likely to choose their own tricks and keep the money they make. So assuming that these women were consentually hooking and their working conditions were good I don't see what all the fuss is about. Paying for sex? C'mon- who the hell cares? Isn't this just more sex-negative politicking? Turning private sex into a public agenda?

Shading the dragon

hot_damn — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 19:14:22 GMT

This round only took about an hour, but for whatever reason bled a lot. Next step- color!

dissipation, definition

hot_damn — Sun, 17 Feb 2008 08:36:04 GMT

Lately I feel dissipated. I'm an intermittently coalescing fog. I wander and meander and imagine that I'm invisible. A former client recently sent me a card stating the following: "Dear Nicole I wanted to let you know that you have left an indelible mark (in a good way) I know you don't have to deal with me at all as I am no longer a client. Yet you had the compassion to do so, and even before that, you had courage and wisdom to impart things I can never forget. I consider you heroic. I only hope I prove myself worthy. One step at a time. Some folks move more slowly than others. My friends call me the turtle lady. I will see you." I am so grateful that she sent such a letter to me. It's one of the threads I'm trying to sew back into my sense of self. I suppose I mean to say: I'm in a period of transition and redefinition. Please wish me luck!

Tattoo!

hot_damn — Sat, 02 Feb 2008 02:19:37 GMT

I finally, finally got my tattoo! There's more shading and coloring to be done in the coming weeks. For those of you thinking about getting work done, I can't say enough about Iggy Van at Idle Hand in the Haight. He rocks.

What do you mean, delay gratification?

hot_damn — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 00:34:11 GMT

My tattoo artist has a cold :-( I have to wait a whole week for my new ink. Drat!