My Blog
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The passing of a great man.
About 5 weeks ago my boss and good friend was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Tuesday he passed away.Michael Lang hired me to work for him about 3 years ago. His company "Brainchild Nutritionals " had been producing vitamins and minerals designed to assist people with autism for a few years prior to my hiring. He was a great friend and the best boss I will ever have. We became acquainted at my old job at the Staff Of Life grocery store . He would come in about once a week to pick up our used packing material. When I saw him it was a given that we would end up talking politics for at least 45 minutes. He was dedicated to truth and justice and his environmental consciousness impressed me. After being fired from the store for scamming free groceries he sought me out to join his company. He was the most generous boss I have ever worked for. He was always concerned with his employees making a living wage and went so far as to give us a week paid vacation in december ,paid sick days, medical and dental insurance and took us all for a 2 day long company retreat that included massages at a pretty swanky place. Besides all that he was just a cool guy who loved to joke around and always had time to soothe an upset parent . After working for the company a while I found out that Michael had developed his supplements to help his two children who had been diagnosed with autism. Some 11 years later there are no noticeable autistic traits visible in them .
Michael was dedicated , hardheaded , loving ,funny and just an all around great guy. After his diagnosis I read a little on pancreatic cancer and was very alarmed at the prognosis. From what I read 95 percent of victims die within 3 to 6 months after diagnosis. This seems to be because the symptoms are very innocuous and easy to dismiss as simple backache and nausea. Because of that by the time it is diagnosed the cancer is very far along. This was the case with Michael.
I spent the last 5 weeks making as many trips to see him as I could. It was very hard to see my friend dying but I wanted to be there for him . I tried to keep a good face and humorous vibe around him and he seemed to appreciate it. What I did for him paled in comparison to his parents and siblings. I feel honored to have witnessed his family drop everything else in their life to be there for him every minute of that time. His parents amazed me .They filled his time with overflowing love and I know it was the hardest time of their life. No one should see their children die and the strength and love they exhibited humbled me.
At this point my coworkers and I are assuming the daunting task of running this company that helps thousands of children. I am completely overwhelmed but committed to continuing Michael's work .BrainChild will continue as it always has, in Michael's memory.
www.brainchildnutritionals.com/Br...tml
A fund has been set up for Michael's children. Please send any donations to the Michael Lang Children's Fund, account number
048274377, c/o Bank of the West, 2020 North Pacific Avenue, Santa Cruz, CA 95062.
Remembering sort of...
Laguna seca Dead show 1988....It started well enjoying the show in the summer sun. I guess the problems started when I forgot to drink water. My vision started to get a little wavy and I soon lost the power of speech which freaked my friends enough to wander off and deal with their own trips. As a begun to lose touch with reality I started to wander . It so happened that it had rained a few days before and with the temperature about 90 the ground had taken on a strange feel with the top layer sundried and hard and soft mud underneath. This meant as I wandered the seemingly hard dirt took on a spongy nature. This was really freaking me out . It seems this was one of the times I had to deal with my roman catholic upbringing. I guess that's why my mind decided demons were trying to pull me down to hell. As I tried to escape the imaginary demons (A.K.A . spongy gound) my wandering became more of a psycotic sprint around the concert. I think my parinoia reached it's peak during set break . I remember falling onto some poor hippy couples blanket wide eyed and completely freaked. They asked me if I was alright and I said no. I don't remember much more about the encounter with them but I don't think they were able to help me. Eventually my legs gave out on me and I sort of passed out in the back part of the show. I say sort of passed out because I couldn't move or see but my ears and my mind were quite active. At this point I begun dissecting lyrics being sung and proceeded to acompany them with the most horrific images my mind could conjur. The one image that remains with me is helicopters spraying the crowd with bullets during Looks Like Rain...fun stuff. I know I'm not the first to do this but I convinced myself that I was dead and that curiously relaxed me enough to lose conciousness. I woke to the sound of a woman asking me if I was alright. Believing I was dead I asked her if she was an angel. She laughed took my hand and led me to the Rock Med tent ( I love those people). As the kind folks there gave me water and reminded me that I had taken something that would soon wear off I started to come around . I don't know why but the sight of one of my friends on the cot 10 feet away with one hand down his pants squirming and babling as 4 people tried to soothe him finally snapped me back. Maybe it was the affect of seeying a familiar face or that he looked more confused than I did but things started to come together for me . I hollered towards them "That's Jack just get his guitar and he'll be fine". At that point Jack looked at me like a dog when you ask if they want to go for a walk. As I was passing the stage after they let me go back to my campsite I was kind of patting myself on the back for making it through and chuckling at my adventure I stopped and stared at the stage. There, onstage were skeletons each bearing a resemblance to the band members. They had guitars and the drummers were seated at their respective kits.What I didn't know was these were props set up for the upcoming Touch Of Grey video to be filmed later that night. As things started to fall apart a little for me I forced myself to walk on to my camp and not think about the reason my favorite band had been reduced to bones. My apologies to you if you encountered me that day .
Happy Birthday Jerry..
Yes let me preface this by saying it's true I'm a friggin deadhead....Jerry and the dead set the stage for many things that we enjoy now and I am "grateful". When I discovered the dead I was in a very negative space and reluctant to acknowledge beauty. That all changed when the notes of the guitar solo in "Row Jimmy" rolled down my back in Oakland in 1987. Not to mention showing me the virtues of extended psychedelically charged dancing. I don't know if the rave scene would have blossomed in the same way without the acid tests of the 60's. So Happy Birthday Jerry a lot of us really miss you. ....
Sometimes...
Sometimes it all comes together.I haven't been djing much lately due to reasons I don't want to get into but last night I played in the side room of The Blue Lagoon here in Santa Cruz. Usually this scenario is not one I get real excited for but this night turned out different. For some reason things seemed to flow so well it felt like it was out of my hands. Earlier in the day I had spent some time digging through my records to find something different to play because I couldn't afford new tracks and the ones in my bag were getting stale. As I picked through I started to realize I have quite a few timeless classics that usually stayed buried in my stacks. So I did my best to pull out a few to spice up my set.
As I arrived for my early 11:00 set I wasn't surprised to see there were about 4 people on the floor. Bog ( who sets the sound up and dj's) had recently upgraded the mixer and It was really sounding good to me. As the night progressed the old tracks had me dancing behind the decks and I realized the size and energy of the crowd was slowly building. Between the crowd energy ,the new sound and the classic tracks 45 minutes into my set it seemed the records were spinning themselves. As I finshed the floor had swelled to about 30 people (which is alot for that small of a room) but more importantly the dancing energy was awesome. There is something about getting total strangers (and a few friends) to lose it on the dancefloor that gets me higher than almost anything. At the end Bog came up and gave me a sweaty hug and a compliment which I won't repeat here but will always remember.. Good times still happen and I'm still smiling.
Crack saved my life!!!
Well it was about 1989 and my friends and I were on our way home to the suburbs from a dead show in Inglewood (yes I am that old) . We blew a tire in a very sketchy neighborhood and we were (ahem) not exactly in the greatest mind set to be dealing with such an emergency. Anyway we handled it and in between fending off panhandlers and crack dealers we got the tire changed and were preparing to leave when my friend actually engages one of the crack dealers in some "bargaining". My friend had never shown an intrest in this gentleman's particular wares so I was kinda mystified and a little pissed. As I prodded him to get in the car he just blew me off and continued his haggling. As I sat in the car and tried to understand what was going on an old muscle car screeched around the corner RIGHT WHERE WE WOULD HAVE BEEN EXITING and plowed head on into a an oncoming car. Following close behind were 5 cop cars with lights and sirens blazing. They skidded to a stop and the cops all drew their weapons and aimed them at the wreckage. We never did see any movement from the wreck as we slowly exited the scene. We were all silent on the ride home as we tried to come to grips with the fact that if my friend had not had the bizzare hankering to haggle with a crack dealer we would likely have been struck by that careening vehicle...Crazy
moments...
Sometimes the seemingly mundane moments of existence fill me with strong emotions.Today while driving I pulled beside a car with a young girl (maybe 8 years old) with her head out the backseat window.
The look on her face , the wind blowing her hair and maybe the song on my radio combined to bring me close to tears.
She seemed so blissfully content in herself that I longed to be her.
Carefree , young , taken care of and a world of possibilities ahead.
I think it was mostly the look on her face that spurred my feelings.
I guess it didn't hurt that I was listening to Gimme Shelter.
Teenage Disneyland Hell
1982, 16 years old and not very bright. My girlfriend at the time had convinced her mom to lend us her 1968 Ford Fairlane to double date with my friend and his girlfriend to Disneyland. The happiest place on earth was located about 2 hours from our homes in the San Gabriel Valley. At the time my friend Ed and I were not known for our moderation so the Southern Comfort and joints were passed quite a few times on the highway. Upon entering the park a splendid time was had by all, that is until we felt the need to replenish our fading buzzes. So we stumbled around looking for a dark corner to continue our party until we found what looked like a suitable bench tucked away in the outskirts of Tomorrow Land. The only problem was the elderly couple snuggling on our bench. We kind of loitered around the bench until the couple graciously offered the bench to us. As they sauntered off to the payphone we wasted no time in breaking out the goodies. We probably had a good 5 minutes of shots and we were halfway through a joint when a most unsettling sight befell us. Walking directly towards us were 2 fellows dressed as keystone cops. As I stubbed the joint out in my palm I believe what they said was “could you please hand me that and come with us?” In a weird kind of daze we walked through tomorrow land with our comical escorts. After walking through some secret door we found ourselves in the fuckin’ Disneyland police station. The place looked like every cop show on television with haggard looking detectives sitting at desks answering phones and radios. We were led to separate cells that were really just like those damn interrogation rooms on TV. I think what they mainly asked me was what we were doing and I figured there was no way to lie my way out of it so I told them the truth. I asked them how they busted us so fast and they were proud to let me know the cute elderly couple on the bench were narcs and the call they made at the payphone was to them. The really screwed part of this whole thing was that because we were all minors rather than release us they felt obligated to call each of our parents to come pick us up. Disneyland is 2 hours from our houses , each way!! That meant each of us could look forward to a harrowing 2 hour drive home with our pissed off parents. So after 2 hours my folks show up and my mom is very upset and my dad is strangely silent. The ride went pretty much as I expected …how could you do this? I’m so disappointed in you. Something about throwing my life away and so on. The ride got a little more interesting when my mom insisted on stopping at the liquor store to pick up some more Southern Comfort so we could “party” when we got home. When we finally arrived at home I tried to allow myself to be swallowed by the living room couch and distract myself with the TV so I wouldn’t hear my mom’s sobs and banging around in the kitchen. I couldn’t help but overhear when she told my dad to break out his stash and roll one up for his son. So a few minutes later I was faced with my irate mother thrusting a glass of Southern Comfort and a joint at me .As I placed both items on the coffee table between us I pleaded, “I don’t want to do this”. To which she retorted, “Come on, you’re a big man, Lets party!!” We continued on like that for maybe 10 minutes until I finally took a big drink put my feet on the coffee table in grand dramatic fashion and lit up the joint. Again, her response was pretty much like I figured it would be. She slapped the joint out of my mouth and broke down in tears screaming, “How could you do this to me!” As I slinked off to my room in the garage I knew our relationship was forever changed. I think until that time she was able to ignore the signs of teenage experimentation. I was no longer her innocent little boy and it worried her. I love my mom more than words can express and I’m sorry that I put her through that. That being said, those times as a teen with my friends were golden and I will always look back on them fondly… Did I mention my son turns 16 in February?
What is your costume??
I'd love to hear all your costumes since I might not see most of you throughout Halloween week...As for me.... Remember, remember the fifth of NovemberThe gunpowder treason and plot.
I see no reason why gunpowder treason
Should ever be forgot..... Guy Fawkes, twas his intent
To blow up king and parliament.
Three score barrels were laid below
To prove old England's overthrow. By God's mercy he was catched
With a dark lantern and lighted match.
Holler boys, holler boys, let the bells ring
Holler boys, holler boys, God save the King.
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