so

this is my pre apocolyptic rant, or ridiculously delusional rant on what is actually going on in society.

man,

people,

to all the people that read this blog of mine that from time to time, has ridiculous things here..

times have been intense..

thats all i can really say.

im not exactly the most educated out of us here, but,

for fucks sake i feeeeeel soo much

its ridiculous.

i walk down a street and i can pick up things left right and center.

i was walking up commercial drive the other day, and suddenly im think about a frriend of mine,

literally two seconds later, there she was..

syncronicity, most of us ...the tribers...know that

except it happens alllll the time.

and yeah. :P

i am seeking knowledge right now, the people and the places to where i am supposed to be and growing with my efforts.

12 string guitar, is what im working on,

djembe, yidaki (didgeridoo)

i watched ridiculous amounts of john butler youtube videos for months, and listened to his music non stop and somehow manifested a 12 string to use :P

a good one, 30 year old

sounds ridiculously amazing,

this man named dan, lent it to me for now, he doesnt play it much,

and man, ive done nothing but play that thing since it came into my hands.

ripped up fingers, hand strength.

and im opening up the channels for guitar to come through me.same with didge and drums.

and there is work being done here...finally@@!

so much wasted time and energy on useless things. now the real stuff is coming, and i want it.

so

as to my mental sanity which im sure some of you are left in question with after a rant like i just put on about a week ago...lol

i have come to some real things,

and they scare the living daylights out of me...

awareness is what has been happening.

i fluctutate between low levels of awareness and levels so high i can manifest very quickly

but its been fluctuating.

cause my mental sanity over coming to grips with real issues in the world,

has been worked over pretty good.

ive been away from people in vic,
avoiding anything that has to do with psytrance, or any event involving too many people, and with people who know me.

needing time away from other peoples influence.

any exterior influence next to music, ive been trying to eliminate that from my life.

so i can find out,

who the heck i am

and why im on earth in the first place, and if im gonna stick around, what the heck am i gonna do lol ....

most people, wake up

go to work,

come home

sleep

i get the chance to exist in trance state, quite often.


us people here on tribe are very priviledged to have a good scope on whats, normal and whats just freaky!

anyway, im working on the freaky part..lol

but ive been living in spirit,

following my intuition, daily, for the last few years.

and my dreams are finally starting to bloom.

music, is something i love more than, talking... or women....(i guess i havent found the right lady yet) lol hence the celibacy!!!!

and it drives my soul


its lead me down to some of the most enriching places of my ridiculous existence..

full on drum and didge trance..... whoah

while doing vipassana.....

LOL

i play my drum and didge, together, as one,

and do vipassana its the crazyiest thing i could come up with to help me heal mymind.

and meta. at the end, loving kindness to the entire makeup of the universe.

its like the love of a million mothers..

whoah

when i feel that..

which has been seldom.

its been powerful

shaken to the bone.

and the notions that have been shared with me,

have shaken me to the bone.

and i feel stirred, to do something, to make some sort of change, in the people,

but its starts in the self,

mastery over the self

i want to master myself and then lead my life well, filled with love. and awesomeness.

but i will be prepared, for this seemingly apoctalyptic nightmare that seems to be drenching the earth.

there is so much going on, in my own life, and that of the worlds, that words cant convey what has happened

except the urge to become an elightened being has become high....i seek the bliss of the masters.. lol

no craving, no aversion,

divine blissfull rivers of creation,

coming through me

through vibrations in the atmosphere

shaking my biosphere.



i just want to live, free, naturally, and peacefilled with music.

ok

im done

hehe

love you all

thanks for being in my life, in the ways you are