words

my endless desire is on fire and it won't go out!

jalex — Mon, 21 Apr 2008 20:22:27 GMT

bhagavan das' full moon kirtan for hanuman was sublime. it has been too long since i took the time to be still and clear my head down to the armature of monkeymind. my crystal sphere is nice and clean; ready for broadcast and reception! of his words, those that most stuck with me have been received by these and other ears/brains countless times but apparently never really sunk in (did they go out the other ear or what?): one's desire in this world is endless, as the world is endless. as a desire is fulfilled, so another desire replaces it. this is a constant part of life, of consciousness. knowing this, one must choose to be happy in the face of one's desires. (paraphrased) this desire/fullfillment/desire is the constant pulsation of spanda, the universe, that corresponds with the drawing in and pushing out of the breath............. ............is it not? .....b.....r.....e....a...t....h........e...................................................................... i love you, bhagavavan das! i love you, hanuman! i love you, everybody!

wishing everybody even more of everything.....and thanks, superjimmy!

jalex — Thu, 17 Apr 2008 21:48:17 GMT

my good pal jimmy hixenbaugh emailed this to me. i found it quite enlightening. "Since the Equinox, and the amazing energy created by the Solar Wave, the energy on the planet has once again intensified. Because all the boundaries have thinned greatly, we are feeling much MORE of EVERYTHING. We are feeling the collective fear on the planet, but also can feel the collective harmony. Feeling more and having less boundaries will make our hearts race and our breathing shallow. A lot of old dramas are popping up around us in our personal lives, and other unresolved dramas are intensifying on a global level. We might feel like crying all the time for no apparent reason. This is yet another sign that we are waking up and becoming more aware. This new intensified energy can also be a place in our lives where we can crack open to yet another layer of awareness and shed old illusions. The great challenge now is to not allow this energy and resurfacing dramas to trigger us into negative, ego based action . . . but to continue to hold peace and balance. We need to hold strong, and add our precious energy to the harmony . . . and not to battling the darkness. If we let go and surrender during this transition, we can shed our history and past pain easier than if we struggle against the changes. We are not going crazy. We are just feeling the planet and the collective consciousness closer to the way the great Creator feels it all the time. Now that we feel it, we can do something about the mis-creations and bring about harmony and peace once again. If we don't know it is broken, we won't be able to fix it, right? " -?

poems on old dusty paper from the bottom of a cardboard box

jalex — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 14:20:54 GMT

some sacred words from one of my first loves, imma lou torgensen: "Eternity" (1990?) Eternity, unrelenting, the soft & sovereign bliss of things long gone and things to come. The long dark tunnel of forever through the tranquil winter of your eyes. Take me there, to that silent somewhere, beyond all precept and pretention and maybe there, in that silent somewhere, I can find a love. "Night Rain" (1990?) I want to be out in the night rain, in the sombre, glowing-green night-time light of the forest, the cool, fragile waters seeping through the trees, a hushing lullabye hymn to all that are living and coherent. Fluent waters of the heavens, so much like the thoughts in me. Let's meander through the night rain like bewitching pagan beasts, laughing and soaking up the darkness around us..... So inviting..... love in the verdant dimness of the grass, cool and sweet in the diminishing rain. Following the gnomes of night in a pulsing ritual Sabbat, Dancing and feasting on each others' minds. Fear abandoned yet reveled in, enlightenment and freedom found under the open skies of damp dark nights. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- i miss you, imma lou! if anyone sees her out in the world please tell her i said so.

shared readings & musings on universal love

jalex — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:47:38 GMT

"Let me remind you who you really are: You are one of the chosen ones. You're a luminous being. A primordial miracle. A resplendent avatar. You are a deity in disguise--not a Buddha or a Christ, but of the same lineage and made from the same mojo. I want to be sure you get what I'm saying. You're an immortal messiah. You have been around since the beginning of time and will be here after the end. Every day and in every way, you're getting better at playing the mysterious master game we all dreamed up together before the Big Bang bloomed. Let me put it another way. You're a rebel creator longing to make the whole universe your home and sanctuary. You are a dissident bodhisattva joyfully struggling to germinate the seeds of divine love that are packed inside every moment. It's time to remember. You are a shimmering burst of spiral hallelujahs that has temporarily taken on the form of a human being, agreeing to endure amnesia about your true origins. And why did you do that? Because it was the best way to forge the exquisitely unique and robust identity that would make you such an elemental force in our 14-billion-year campaign to bring heaven all the way down to earth. You and I are freedom fighters scrambling and finagling and conspiring to relieve all of our fellow messiahs from their suffering and shower them with more blessings than they know what to do with." -Rob Brezny PRONOIA IS THE ANTIDOTE FOR PARANOIA: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings

!wow!

jalex — Thu, 20 Mar 2008 23:30:16 GMT

i just saw the most amazing thing! i went downtown to get a hot dog from my buddy jonah, who works @ matlock's dogs by the courthouse by day and is a silscreening superhero by night. so there i am, eating a polish dog with the works and chewin the fat with my friend, when well over a thousand middle school kids come walking by screaming "WHAT DO WE WANT? PEACE! WHEN DO WE WANT IT? NOW!" at the top of their adolescent lungs! the gale force of young voices united rang off the towers and brought tears of pride and joy to my eyes as i laughed out loud! apparently five hundred middle schoolers walked out of their classrooms and converged on pioneer square, where they proceeded to call everybody they knew. soon there were kids from all portland school districts walking out. they filled the courtyard outside town hall and climbed the front of the building to the terrace before the police deterred them, and then stayed there til the mayor came out and spoke to them. they proceeded to wells fargo bank and filled that courtyard, then wound it back up towards the square. their numbers dispersed a bit after cops grabbed a couple of boys and roughed 'em up around 3rd & salmon; one kid got hauled around by the hair in a full nelson that could have broken his wrist and the other got his face ground up against a curb. a crowd of adults and i stood across the street chanting "LET THEM GO! " for awhile to no avail; finally i shouted "let go of his hair you sicko! we're watching you!" and he did! he even turned and made eye contact with me! after that they put those two boys in separate cars. i couldn't get close enough to get badge numbers before the squad dispersed us. sorry, kid, i didn't want to get maced! if anybody else witnessed this, please please report it! those middle school kids posed no threat to fully armed police officers. anyway, a surprising number of kids stuck it out after things got rough and they re-congregated in the pioneer courthouse square. i wondered why more adults were not joining them. overall, i would say it was more organized effective and orderly than many of the adult-organized demonstrations i've seen. !way to go, kids!

yes, i am back on tribe

jalex — Tue, 18 Mar 2008 01:39:00 GMT

i have really missed using this tool to communicate with everybody i've sought out through countless sleep deprived channelled broadcasts for all your beauty and wit and awareness and most of all raw visceral talent! i have been sequestered in an intensely monogamous intimate healing partnership for almost two years now but today i feel free to invite the world back into my life in order to ask for help in achieving the ceremony of 8000 drums. i have a studio in a shared warehouse space in old town portland where i'll be hosting a session and i hope everyone who cannot make it takes a moment or a couple hours to join us, wherever you are, in drumming for peace, unity of indigenous people, and healing of the planet from 9am to 11am (or better yet all day long!) on fri. 3/21/08. more: http://portland.tribe.net/event/Global-Event-8000-Drums-Healing-Mother-Earth-Ourselves/portland-or/b406a0af-9a92-4cb9-865e-0248c9c72b3d peace, love, and light! ja ininitecolumoflight bhava jalex johnalex

EVERYTHING IS PRICELESS

jalex — Fri, 07 Mar 2008 19:52:23 GMT

EVERYTHING IS PRICELESS (2/08) each star is a spiral every raindrop is a gem every person is a glowing flower with soul-root as its stem every leaf is a jewel each stone is an ancient soul every tree is a sacred pillar each belly is a crucible love all things sing your dreams into existence exceed subsistence and flourish nourish the world with love of the world soar to new heights with wings unfurled be your priceless destiny!

Be Whole

jalex — Wed, 13 Sep 2006 18:15:21 GMT

!hi! i am open, seeping flyin by yer car on my bike i am broken, bleeding goin on a ten-mile hike i am chained & shackled drivin in that railroad spike the whip goes crack on my back and i still just do what i like: turn garbage into gold bring youth to the old glean truth from all the heinous lies that they told while transcending the matter of this spacetime fold a walking wound waiting to be healed i feel the heel of the world on my neck ah heck, o well in the eye of god i'm but a speck floating from a mote that must be outcast before he can cast out the mote from his neighbor's eye a mote in the eye of god how odd that i am the antibody can't anybody anybody anybody help me cure this huge psychotic beast of a being? step right up, folks! it's really worth seeing this incredible freak in a cage.... ....oh. i see. yer already engaged in other trivial persuits. brain of monkey eye of newt boil, boil, toil and trouble.... ah, shoot! we git this gimp limpin in no time, fix up this broken windup diety with mandrake, sulfur, lime and other mortal remedies i am one nectar distilled from a thousand toxins, i'm a warren of rabbits made from the fodder of foxes i'm a pheonix rising from the self-ignited flames of a bonfire made from discarded corsages and loveletters to the beloved with no name from pain and torment i make massages a collage of handprints on my skin wears the line between pain & bliss thin i grow fins to guide me thru this sea of excruciating pleasures compounded land ho! i've found the island invisible college of freedom where i'll grow bales of liberation with a green thumb three spikes through extremities & a spear in the ribs makes one wounded healer this last supper is sloppy, joe best get out yer bib like an insect waving its feelers i seek stillness in the constant flow eyes glow, spirit flies love grows, fears die scry the object of desire stoke that sputtering heartfire raise the soaring spirit higher feel the entire world's wounds close as you close yours be whole.

i am

jalex — Wed, 13 Sep 2006 17:33:33 GMT

i am ice i am stone i am water and wind combined i am the infinite pool of time between ticks and tocks on clocks i ride the vector of a gaze from one set of eyes to another seeking only truth i am ancient i am youth i am you you are all this too

happy anniversary, baby bush conspiracy!

jalex — Sun, 10 Sep 2006 17:49:55 GMT

as we pass the day that marks the death of democracy in the u.s and the beginning of the military junta into which we have all been implicated, we can expect to have a fresh batch of wool pulled over our eyes. take the unveiling of a new bronze sculpture by the belmont firehouse during yesterday's street fair commemorating the deaths of the service workers who died during the secondary explosions inside the towers: we are supposed to belive that this was due to foreign terrorism, but we know better. don't you? the oregonian's front page story is full of it today, comemorating five years of totalitarian policy change & blaming it on "one terrible day" and "terrorist plots." right they are, but who are the terrorists? "many officials say the question about next big attack on the united states is when, not if, it will happen," says that front page. those officials would know, since they are helping to orchestrate it. do you not know what i'm talking about? whether or not you do, you need to see this video. <embed style="width:400px; height:326px;" id="VideoPlayback" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" src="http://video.google.com/googleplayer.swf?docId=-5946593973848835726&hl=en"> </embed> 4/23?/07:please disregard that last bit of nonsense & view comments to this post

props to libramoon's mom

jalex — Tue, 15 Aug 2006 16:57:00 GMT

i just rediscovered the most beautiful poem in my bhava tribe. here it is: \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ And Why Not Now? The 4th dimension that subsumes the 3 -- length, width, depth. We move as we will in space, Yet we move always in time Whether we want or even know it; Ever onward through eternity; Moment to moment Encompassing all of our lives. And yet they say there is no time, only now. Every precious moment, every interminable hour, every slippery slovenly unrelivable day an unrelenting onward and inward and outward and soulesque surrounding eternity. Where is now? Yes, everywhere, of course, but how do we divine the intention, manifest the intention, give birth to form and substance, give meaning to the here and now that expands into times unknown? How do we have meaning that stands true and real, that stands the test of time, that expands outward, strands playing in the breeze entangling and evolving? How do we tame Now and make a dance of time, swinging and swaying, executing formal twirls of shadow and light to uplifted applause? How do we account for time, yet spend it like raindrops, yet live in eternal awakening? If it must be done, it must be done now! There is no waiting room in eternity. Yet there is no being done. There is only doing, and being, and bravely swimming uncharted seas. (c) Laurie Corzett (libramoon) www.geocities.com/Athens/Parthenon/8401/

more love

jalex — Mon, 17 Jul 2006 17:00:43 GMT

YOU GET ME HIGH (1/05) ----------------------- a hot platter of passion flower a powerful hour of sensual dream lived through flesh two consciousnesses enmesh and press their meat together defying fate, chance, and weather for spiritual and physical pleasure the evening wanes, becoming night two firey beacons, bright caged within two breasts permeating ribs and flesh to rekindle one another two psyches flutter to new heights as four eyes gaze through two skulls into vertiginous vaults of time within endless towers of incarnation.... shyly, night melts into the day still without games two bodies play nourished simply with sensation drinking of sunshine and moonshadow tonics dripped like nectar onto lips by hand i recieve, demanding nothing, opening like the canyon that accepts all the bounty of heaven the caress of sweet lips the soft flow of breath the undeniable bright warmth of love all like rain flowing through me unto the sea i lean over the edge of this bliss-precipice i fall into you i drop like a rock i melt like goo then float like a feather on vectors of truth into an ascendant sky you get me high.

inspired by love

jalex — Mon, 17 Jul 2006 16:36:36 GMT

LOVE-FLOW (2K3) my love is never spent it gets bigger as it burns it swells as it yearns for more love kiss me and take off your kid gloves when my playpush comes to your loveshove our hearts become two doves and fly... love cannot be lost, it cannot die or be left in the pockets of your discarded threads our days are not done even after we're dead and i can't ignore... should we not stare... at the angels that dwell in the thin, shared air and in the light reflecting off our eyes? do you want to know where heaven lies? it lies inside your heart, behind your eyes... i felt it when your eyes met mine, kindling fires divine. when your hands touched my thighs i knew it was wise to come down off this high heaven pie in the sky cloud nine. when you bounced your butt against me nonchalantly at a party my loins wept and cried. i know i would be fine without this spun bliss but would have just one kiss to remember it by. my dream-filled passion will not be rationed out like slop in a soup-line my unbroken promises are uncut and feel fine This magical moment melts into tomorrow making memories from destinies faded late. the fates resurrect our beauty and bliss in each merciful moment, never wait moving us with sublime alchemies to realms outside of time. Put your fists in the air suck wind "H A M" unclench your fists, let go... drop your arms and blow "S A" this is how one feels the flow come get some L O V E to stoke the glow of your heartfire's hearth make some art and give it away on the street beat your meat in public if you want sacrifice yourself in the hunt for the love-flow. don't close your hand. L E T G O.

infinite columns of light

jalex — Mon, 27 Mar 2006 14:07:36 GMT

OUROBOROS (beltane 2K3) a tiny spark of consciousness a flickering flame in a skull like a bowl of coals with a chunk of phosphorous dropped on top the brightly colored flame leaps to life seeming to devour the flux which actually consumes Itself in chemical reaction to the heat... around this is wrapped a heap of meat shambling, slowly decaying, temporary this flesh envelope for the spark that starts and stokes the skull's coals for the infinite columns of light that lift the heavens and bear down upon the bowels of the earth Above, Beyond, and Through each individual's consciousness of space and time these columns stand demanding nothing but what is: Birth... ...Death... ...Rebirth... ...Death.... ..."REJOICE! MOURN NOT MY DEATH!" say the spirits then fly like sun beams to the celestial realms to find new flesh or remain ephemeral they know they left themselves behind in sounds squirreled away in time and always have in other forms in other climes since long-distant times far out of present minds, when tribal chants led by masters of incantation made tectonic plates shake and caused swells in the ocean. Then people started writing down the sounds to make them stay. people were taught not to chant but to pray then the words were lost much later found buried in the cold, hard ground and coveted much Love was lost over those documents in long tired dirty arguments over their meanings and the demeaning application of their truths the youths forgot them, left them to rot, buried them, burnt some mopped up their snot with the copies that were made but then they were dug up, translated, reiterated, mutilated, mutated, expounded upon, processed, stewed, refried, and cooked to paste....nothing left but crusty, dead food for thought sitting too long under the heat lamp of collective consciousness. HOW FRESH THE BRIEF YOUNG FLAME HOVERING ABOVE THE COALS OF A SKULL BOWL! a tiny spark of consciousness a flickering flame in a skull like a bowl of coals with a chunk of phosphorous dropped on top....

T H A N X O X O X O X

jalex — Thu, 23 Mar 2006 10:01:37 GMT

we thank each of you for being you, and for doing what you do all of us are infinite columns of light too all you gotta do is believe what you know is true and truely do it if somethin isn't that then i say screw it

CALLING ALL DIETIES

jalex — Sun, 12 Mar 2006 18:02:12 GMT

CALLING ALL DIETIES (02/04) Drunken wizards and witches cast Dizzy Spells, causing itches, twitches, bad body smells, crooked baseball pitches, and other minor maladictions from afar while they wallow at the local bar spilling gossip-swill chased with envy down their chins Can I take you for a spin down a forgotten memory lane? No? That's okay. I'd rather refrain from dwelling on the past. The present is a blast, the future don't exist I subsist off THIS Bright Fire in my breast... would you like a taste? The Fates, The Muses, the wind, the sun and tide reveal their full forces or hang their heads and hide at my behest and yours too if you accept what you know is true that the world is shaped by your thoughts BELIEF CREATES this is something we were taught in ancient times when gods walked the land and sea before divinity was taken from you, from me from all our brothers and sisters. how long will it be before we set ourselves free from this forgetful fate my friends! my fellow Gods! Stop Forgetting! It is Never Too Late Never Too Late NEVER TOO LATE TO BE FREE! Free from your hatred, your envy, your doubt... Free from posessing and going without... Free from small curses all laid on our heads by those who might hate us or wish we were dead... Free from our head - trips, obscessions, desires... Free even from US, our immortal fires of consciousness.... No flesh-traps to keep us in time... WE ARE GOLDEN, IMMORTAL, PERFECT, DIVINE!

where's my purple heart?

jalex — Mon, 23 Jan 2006 22:02:45 GMT

? WHY BUY GAS ? (1/06) wounded in the war against gas got tripped by a tree & my face got smashed sure ain't the first time, but i hope it's the last out of five long years, only two bikes trashed can't count the # of times that i crashed whtever don't killya might make you strong but @ that rate the wait will not be long before the 3 fates' kingking drops a big fat dingdong on yer head, mang! the dr. said my collarbone will prob'ly never break again my upper lip is numb as stone; it'll heal i dunnowhen when you see my right eye red as blood don't ask me how i've been just know that i am tougher now and hug me once again reflect the love i hold for you & thereby heal me, my friend then maybe i can heal you a little further down the bend my bike has been truer to me than all the peeps that i lived with everyday she always got me to & from all my bizness i remember when i got her after a rave @ itisness the last two times i totalled her we finally had a witness if you don't ride a bike to work you probably don't get this ??does anybody get this?? does annybody understand the importance of this heroic environmentally crucial means of propelling yerself thru the universe with yer wits, gravity, and yer body's own power? !please! !i implore thee! consider the ? of the hour: ? WHY BUY GAS ?