The Tale of Two Kittens

Miabella's studio has these feral cats all around the building. They are very skittish and have no want, need, or desire for humans. When Dawn, Brandi, and I left the studio last night, these two kittens ran towards us. They even allowed us to pick them up. This was way too strange. Brandi started telling me how they sometimes find dead cats in the parking lot and that we really shouldn't leave them there. They were also very skinny so I decided to take them home with me. At least I could feed them for the night and then take them to the SPCA were they could find a good home.

Well, I found out on the ride home that I just inherited two characters. The black & grey kitten was being snuggly and spent most of the drive home in my lap. And if she wasn't there, she was constantly trying to go under my feet. The white kitten was all over the place. She spent part of the ride on my dashboard right in front of me, the other part of it in the back window. When I came out of the grocery store, they were both sitting in the back window snuggling close to each other. They were having way too much fun in my car. Got home, fed them, gave them a flea and tick bath (they were filthy and had ticks), and wrapped them up in big towels which they liked WAY too much. That's where they slept last night, on our bathroom floor wrapped in towels.

They are definitely 2 peas in a pod. They play together, eat together, and they even use the restroom together, which I find a bit disturbing, lol. Dave is convinced that they were dumped in the parking lot. They are just too well adjusted. They keep being all cute and stuff. I'm seriously thinking they planned this. "Look there are bellydancers! Let's be all cute and we can sucker them into giving us a home."

*sigh* Its working.

A trip down memory lane...

"I guess there will be one great party in hell since you will be the only one in heaven polishing the pearly gates."

A response from my grandmother to a man in her church for giving her a hard time about going to hell for working on Sunday (she was a nurse).

Love ya, Grandma!

3 Ways to Stop Negative Thinking

Some of my friends have been posting about all the body issues and negative thinking that plaques them. Yeah, I feel you. I stumbled across this article and maybe it can help a little.

3 Ways to Stop Negative Thinking
Don't Let Negative Thoughts Sabotage Your Efforts
-- By Dean Anderson, Behavioral Psychology Expert

You’ve gone over your calories for the day or eaten something on your “forbidden” list. You figure that since you've blown your diet, you might as well keep on eating and start over tomorrow. You keep eating, but despise yourself for it.

You’ve done well all week, but the scale says you’ve gained a pound. You panic, feeling certain that you’re doomed to be fat forever.

You set the alarm an hour early to exercise, but hit snooze. Feeling like a lazy slug, you wonder if you have any willpower to do what you know you need to.

Do any of these scenarios sound familiar to you?

The tendency to leap from minor, trivial problems to overblown, unrealistic conclusions is something that everyone struggles with to some degree. This type of negative thinking is one of the biggest reasons that people have difficulty sticking to their weight loss plan—and why small problems can cause stress and misery that is often avoidable.

Of course, there are dozens of deep, psychological reasons why individuals get caught up in this negativity. But you don’t have to know why you do it to stop being negative. All you have to do is to take a close look at what you are actually doing and decide to stop doing it for that moment. Here are three techniques you can use to stop all those negative thoughts before they stop you:

1. Look for Hidden Thoughts and Assumptions

The process of moving from an event (like going over your daily calories) to a conclusion about the meaning of that event (I’ve blown my diet) and what you should do about it (keep eating, start over later), typically involves several more mental steps that you probably aren’t aware of. Psychologists call these intermediate steps automatic thoughts because they are habitual, happen quickly, and feel so “right” to us that we don’t even notice them.

Although you can’t completely prevent automatic thoughts from occurring (after all, they naturally help us make good decisions in a hurry), these thoughts are not always accurate. Chronic negativity about yourself or your situation is a good sign that your automatic thoughts are inaccurate.

Luckily, it’s not difficult to learn how to identify your automatic thoughts, figure out if they make sense, and change the ones that aren’t working for you. The first step is to develop the habit of asking yourself: "What would have to be true in order for the negative conclusion I reached to be justified?"

For example, what would have to be true in order for going over your calorie limit to mean that you've “blown” your diet? Wouldn’t it have to be true that your diet is a one-day event that requires a perfect performance on your part? You know that's not the case.

2. Learn to Argue with Yourself

Once you recognize some of your automatic thoughts, you can inspect them and, if necessary, argue with them. The flaw in the above example is pretty obvious: Permanent weight loss is not a short-term project, and doesn’t require perfection. But sometimes the flaw or assumption won’t be as obvious. If that's the case, then you may need to do some investigating.

Before you jump to conclusions or attack your own character, ask yourself a few basic questions:
- If someone I respect did exactly what I did, would I come to the same conclusion about them that I’m coming to about myself?
- If someone came to me asking for advice about how to deal with this problem, what would I say to them? Would I tell them it’s a lost cause?
- How does my conclusion help solve the problem? Does deciding that I’m a "lazy slug" without willpower empower me or enable me to do better next time? What thoughts would do that?
- Is this a problem that lots of people have or am I the only one facing it? What do other people think or do when they run into this problem?
- Is this problem a general pattern in my life or am I blowing one incident out of proportion? Are there times when I do well at things that clearly require willpower and self-discipline—like going to work every day and taking care of my family?
- Have I put the same amount of time and effort into thinking about solutions as I have into listing the problems?

The more of these questions that you ask yourself, the more easily you’ll be able to spot—and correct—your negative automatic thoughts that are lurking underneath your tendency to assume the worst whenever things don’t go the way you planned.

3. Do What Doesn't Come Naturally

One reason that negative thoughts become so automatic and pervasive in our minds is that they are consistent with our typical feelings. If you find yourself jumping to negative conclusions about yourself, your abilities, and your options and opportunities, it’s probably because that feels “right” and comfortable to you.

This doesn't mean you have to figure out why it feels "right" to feel bad about yourself. Again, you'll simply respond better to doing things differently, rather than spending hours rooting through emotional baggage.

Changing those negative thoughts and judgments into realistic and reasonable ones is going to feel uncomfortable and unnatural. In fact, feeling uncomfortable is probably a good sign that this is exactly what you need to be doing to get past your problems.

So when you're unsure about what the problem is, your best bet is to do what doesn’t come naturally. When you find yourself arriving at a negative conclusion about you or your situation, stop thinking that and start thinking the exact opposite. If you’re thinking that there’s something fundamentally wrong with you, tell yourself the problem is in the situation—not in you—and look for ways to change the situation. If you think you’re "doomed to be fat forever," tell yourself that success is unavoidable if you want it; if you’re feeling like a "lazy slug," tell yourself that your “true self” really does want to exercise. You get the idea.


No matter how big, bad or scary the problem seems, you're always just one thought away from turning it into an opportunity for change, growth and progress. All you have to do is find that thought.

Tribal Fest

Just got the performance info from the Blacksheep Bellydance tribe:

Friday:
10:04-10:17 - Urban Gypsy, featuring Sahira & Zymmirah, Tribal Fest 8 Instructors! (TX)
10:26-10:36 - Michelle, Tribal Fest 8 Instructor! (TX) Disclaimer: Michelle is presenting her own style, “Pin-Up Girl Belly Dance!”

Yay! Can't wait to see what you have in store.

I'll be performing on Sunday 11:58-12:04. I'm not there yet and my nerves are already kicking in, lol. So for those veteran Tribal Fest performers, any advice?

2 days left to go!

Can't wait to get home. I miss my family and friends, BADLY. To make it worse, I'm having serious dance withdrawals. I was hoping to do a little bit of dance practice in my hotel room but with the hours we have been pulling, I'm lucky if I make it to the restaurant to get dinner. Even sleep is eluding me. You would think with the long hours and jetlag I would have no problem going to sleep, but even the assistance of 3 mojitos, I'm lucky if I get 4 hours. I'm going to be useless when I get home.

Holy shit, it just hit me. I signed up to dance at Tribal Fest and read on the Blacksheep tribe that everyone who sent an application is set to perform. Between work and traveling, I got only 4 weeks to pull something together. Choreography, costuming, look. At least I got the music. I'm so out of practice! Yes, panic has officially set in, lol.

Anybody want to help me with costuming? I'll pay :-)

4 Wench Productions "We Have Queso"

Since I'm missing yet another dance event (this is REALLY starting to get old), I'm going to do some promoting here.

The 4 Wenches minus one will be at Kismet this Saturday vending some wonderful goodies and handing out flyers for TRIBAL ALCHEMY 2008. Frederique, Elizabeth Strong, Mira Betz, Asharah, Steven from Atasha Maya, Urban Gypsy and Visions In Dance will be our wonderful instructors for this year! Mira even agreed teach 2, that's right, 2 classes this year. Gotta love it!

Also, we are selling raffle tickets for "Tribal For A Day". "What's this?", you may ask. For one day you get the following:

*1 hour photo session with Dave of Image Fusion AND a complimentary 8x10 photo

*1 hour private tribal dance lesson

* costuming-pantaloons, twist top, tassel belt, bindis, hair accoutrements such as flowers and feathers

*a CD filled with music for the tribal lovin' dancer

*complete make-up applied by one of our team

Raffle tickets are $5 and will be available at Kismet. So you want to do the raffle but won't be at Kismet? Well, first, shame on you for not going to Kismet (just kidding!). Raffle tickets are available online at tribalforaday.eventbrite.com

Oh, one more thing. When you see Dave at Kismet give him a big boobie hug! I'm feeling guilty about being gone so much and I think this would brighten his day ;-)

*hugs* to all and ,hopefully *fingers crossed*, I'll get to see ya at Sadiyya's shindig!