music: Eye of the Storm

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Its Alive...

con-fusion

Con - against
Fusion - merging

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I have lived with 'confusions' in my awareness, for which I have somewhat effectively medicated myself with understanding.

It has been incomplete.

I hear so much. It rains in like a tickertape of thoughts, mostly monotone... from a whole layer of awareness that seems to be... you. the people around me. Yet very aware versions of ya'll, seeing and thinking and recognizing things I cannot. Hearing my thoughts.

Here is my emerging model of understanding.

the Hawaiians understand both a higher, and a lower self. WE live and grow in the middle mostly, and have both layers in relation to ourselves.

I believe this as wavelengths, and energy fields. There is an 'octave', a range of energy that extends from one wavelength to the wavelength twice as long...along with the waves in between, and the relationshiops between themn... this corresponds to a musical 'octave' from one note to the next higher note of the same 'letter'. C to C.

then there is a whole range below this, down to HALF the original wavelength... and a whole range above this up to TWICE the higher wavelength.

By comparison, pianos have over seven octaves.

So I believe that the range we are most attuned in, with the traditional hive senses, is the middle self. We are learnging to harness the 'lower' self, and integtate its strengths, and we are learning to be guided by the 'higher' self, and integrate its strengths.

Thie 'higher' self is, in my understanding, not 'above ' us, but a higher WAVELENGTH. the actual energy is, and has always been, within us. the challenge is to bridge it so clearly that we are functioning with it, rather than amidst confusion.

con fusion, the experience of forces pushing against each other, rather than learning to merge, and harmonize.

My sense, my intuitivon, is tis.

My chin chakra, energy center, wildflower... seems to function as a translator. If I op[ened all the receptors at once, I'd go nuts. I have tyried this, or rather, I have tried opening much more than I had before, and it really is overwhelming. But this series of steps did enable me to open MORE, and learn to channel energy through my chin. The chin 'translates it into more palatable pieces. my balance? I get this tickertape of thboughts that my own essence has somehow selectyed, or my guidance has... for me to be aware of.

It often involves very insightful glances into other peopole. I overhear YOUR thoughts. It isn't an open door scenerio. I can't CHOOSE to, and I can barely choose NOT to. But when it comes through, I get repeated examples that it is in fact the real deal.

Yet many of the 'thoughts' I hear are very very mean. I had SUCH a difficult time with this, constantly overhearing nasty statements amidst confusion.. the warst thoughts and feelings realloy.

My perception now, is that I was diving. I was learning to focus, to refocus my consciouslness into the octave BELOW, where more primal, survival thoughts and feelings live. It isn't that this is a evil or even horrible vib ration. It isn't directly less evolved, but it is heavily focused on the body. Along with the passions and emotions that are most challenging to cinorporate.

they are here for everyone, I just somehow got 'stuck'. and it is almost as if my middle self trying to be a very good person self, got focused on the lower self, so I began taking an aweful lot of 'hits' energy meanness that I presume most people mostly ignore.

then there is the higher range. It is easy to be there sometimes, but con fusion still comes in. Because how on earth can this person who just said that very mean thing and threw a fit... actually an Angel? because we are all divine, and we all focus a greater awareenss of divine connection in this higher self within us... and we are all learning to integrate the body centered life and thoughts we are...l with this more eternally aware self.

In the grand scheme of things, it isn't hell. It is karma, it is the process of learning to integrate divergent awareness and experience within one life. that is the magic of this body, this self, this existence.

Orange Root

If you meditate on it, you'll realize that this distribution, this 'tuning' of the chakras leaves a red root, and a 'yellow' heart.

I have found after about two years of working with this approach, that it is possible to change the natural color of the chakras, within a range of influence. the results are... interesting.

With the red root, and the yellow heart, I find that the love is fiercer and raw. The love that tears things down because it is time to change them. the love that will end relationships, jobs and homes because love knows it has a clearer place to live and thrive.

Love always does this, but with a consciously yellow heart, it seems to be... more raw and fierce.

After a while of working like this, I am more consistently tuning my root to orange, and my heart then becomes green.

I do not believe there is a 'fixed' color for each chakra. with the standard new age way of putting the root as red, and the heart as green, the distribution is stretched out. In my experience this has functioned to SLOW THINGS DOWN.

As we all learn about the chakras as a culture, it has been appropriate to keep it with breaks on so to speak. When you allow this shift... it flows more freely.

with the root orange, some interesting things happen.

first of all, to be raw about it... there is a desire to leave 'fucking' It isn't a judgement, its a vibration. The higher fibe (higher doesn't equal beetter, just higher frequency) changes things.

so the result has been mixed. For periods my sex life has shut down almost completely. and then when it turns on, it is full of much more intense orgasms, that come from much LESS intense 'work'. Namely, less is more. By being intune with more subtle vibrations, the energy body is able to let more energy in, and out.

Its worth it : )

It does require you to be willing to abstain from sex for periods however, becuase the changes can get a little wild. basically, be gentle. meditate with the color orange in the root, and an orange yellow 'fire' in the pelvis.

Much Love

Awakening Dreams

years ago I moved into my grandparents house when they left. It wasn't exactly an inheritance, but it was indeed a gift. A refuge, a side door out of the corporate world, and expectations. I sat and meditated for nine months.

Over the past decade, I have had a recurring dream, that I inherit that house, and go through this... rather obvious door, that I somehow never managed to enter. an incredible space opens, huge, expansive, dilapitated.

it needs work, but it offers space to create my true dreams. what I need is right here with me...Yesterday I recorded a new flow in a giant, dilapitated, mostly empty, barn. It is lovely, a true expression of my soul.

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Shakti Flow Sex and Flowers

As we say goodbye to michael jackson, I think its opportune to look into how our pranic awakening gets confused with sexuality, and how they can both influence and bless each other.

Even the roots of the Indian chakra system seem to have handed us this idea that the pelvis chakra is the 'sexual' chakra. bullshit. it is INTIMACY, a very powerful expression of which is sexual.

raise the energy, and it becomes quite clear that this is pura vida, prana, intense life itself (one expresssion of which is sexual).

I'll go so far as to suggest, if you cannot raise the energy to your heart STOP. This is your system saying NO, and sexual orgasm under such circumstances is consistently draining in my experience.

Once you dolearn to raise it, well it is no longer a desperate feeling to release, the energy has found a new way to flow. from this vantage orgasm can be much more powerful, and yet it is no longer insistent. from this balance, it is also wonderful to simply allow calm, and the feeling of fullness to come into the body, breathing the prana into every cell.

when shakti flows powerfully, the pelvis chakra activates often. I went through a lot of confusion thinking this was always arousal. it isn't, its just flow. EVERYONe can connect in a way that activates the second chakrachildreen and octagenarians, if we imagine its always a 'sexual' arousal, the genitals will respond, and a lot of confusion, shame and fear result.

GET IT INTO YOUR HEART before going further. its really wonderful, maturing, and transformational.

There are several ways to do this. If the arousal is demanding, and somewhat uncomfortable, I suggest focusing on the navel, balanced by the third eye. get them both activated with focus and intent, while the pelivs churns. then feel the energy move up once it is in the stomach, it is easier to raise it further once this step has been taken.

this 'chord' is a very strong way to direct the flow when it is demanding, and confusing.

If it is a more gentle feeling, focusing on the third eye balanced by the heart together will raise it .

It gets more and more natural, and it is very empowering to mature into a relationship with prana that is no longer demanding.

you never loose your sexuality, it just becomes a more humble, (more amazing) and graceful part of life.

Raising and Transforming 'sexual' energy

thank you for your great posts!

Its REALLY important to change this confusion of 'sexual energy'.

Indeed, as we say goodbye to michael jackson, I think its doubly important. Even the roots of the Indian chakra system seem to have handed us this idea that the pelvis chakra is the 'sexual' chakra. bullshit. it is INTIMACY, a very powerful expression of which is sexual.

but as mani says, raise the energy, and it becomes quite clear that this is pura vida, prana, intense life itself (one expresssion of which is sexual).

I'll go so far as to suggest, if you cannot raise the energy to your heart STOP. This is your system saying NO, and sexual orgasm under such circumstances is consistently draining in my experience.

Once you do raise it, well it is no longer a desperate feeling to release, the energy has found a new way to flow. from this vantage orgasm can be much more powerful, and yet it is no longer insistent. from this balance, it is also wonderful to simply allow calm, and the feeling of fullness to come into the body, breathing the prana into every cell.

when shakti flows powerfully, the pelvis chakra activates often. I went through a lot of confusion thinking this was always arousal. it isn't, its just flow. EVERYONe can connect in a way that activates the second chakrachildreen and octagenarians, if we imagine its always a 'sexual' arousal, the genitals will respond, and a lot of confusion, shame and fear result.

GET IT INTO YOUR HEART before going further. its really wonderful, maturing, and transformational.

There are several ways to do this. If the arousal is demanding, and somewhat uncomfortable, I suggest focusing on the navel, balanced by the third eye. get them both activated with focus and intent, while the pelivs churns. then feel the energy move up once it is in the stomach, it is easier to raise it further once this step has been taken.

this 'chord' is a very strong way to direct the flow when it is demanding, and confusing.

If it is a more gentle feeling, focusing on the third eye balanced by the heart together will raise it .

It gets more and more natural, and it is very empowering to mature into a relationship with prana that is no longer demanding.

you never loose your sexuality, it just becomes a more humble, (more amazing) and graceful part of life.

Moon Casting

two new flows, 'opening' and 'eye of the storm'

I pray with both of them, meaning I'll chant the chorus, and flow out the words inbetween. thus each time I pray is different, but has the common anchor.

I'm usually suprised people don't 'get' how deep and difficult it is to do this. But its so much fun, and so true and liberating, I keep going anyway : )

kaiya.podbean.com/

Love to hear from ya'll on them.

Much Love

People of The Earth Tribe Rise

I recently resolved an old drive to flow with music by choosing to record some every moon cycle and post in rhythm with the Moon.

Its not a song really, its a Lfow. I use the Chorus to center and focus the prayer, and let spirit sing through my heart.

spiritual dominance

I feel the need to be clearer.

I don't want to embody what I'm criticizing here, and at the same time Its important for me to assert this.

I find the 'break the ego down for you' approach to be very abusive. It is designed specifically to 'wash' people clear, so they can take in the energy of a guru. this presumes that they are filthy as they are, and only the teacher can clean them, and that this person is the best one to fill them back up because they are more divine.

this thread began with coyote sharing HIS OWN guidance, and mr yogi saying 'this is the wrong guidance'. THAT is abusive. it seems subtle, but it essentially communicates that he shouldn't trust himself.
(I, rather than trust themselves 'because they are not ready'.

A child is ready to learn how to trust themselves.

the insidious nature, is that once someone has been 'cleared' in this way, they feel very clearly that they should help others 'clear' in the same fasion. they see the ego game they were subjected to everywhere.

There is some medicine in this, and a lot of misuse. for some people, it may be the best medicine. but it is not designed to elevate everyone. I really want to make that clear. yogi maden even said it, he's only searching for the select few..., (despite having 34534r friends). these few are 'elevated' in a paradigm that needs peons. that is what happened in India.

I am grateful, deeply grateful, for the gifts of yoga. and I'm also aware that it has been, for millenia, an elite practice of a caste system that KEPT the lower classes down, at all costs. they were not allowed to be anything other than the lower classes, by birth. and they played the role of feeding the upper classes their spiritual energy.

as the practices comes to america, we have the opportunity to be part of a transformation, where their wisdoms and gifts of learning to feel, to balance, to breathe, and to explore both physically and spiritually are freed to the world, and we discard the klipatch, the husk, the patterns of dominance that were perhaps necessary to keep the fire burning through ages where culture could not afford to support many people who didn't work to create shelter and food.... but are not relevant to our present age.

Now is different. we are more in touch with our eternal selves. we can draw on ancient wisdom easily and naturally. most of us are highly literate, and we have it available to create a world without war.

we begin, by removing the need to dominate each other. knowledge is never more important than love.

learn, accept teachers. but do not surrender personal divine guidance as the ultimate root. teachers are part of divinity, and each of us is always divine.

the same balance on excess, the same stability that highly revered teachers provide, can be replaced by something much more dynamic and fun. spiriutal collaboration. we balance eeach other.

thje only prerequisite for participating at the lowest and highest levels, is that we honor and respect the divinity already present in everyone. no level of consciousness can be embodied that exempts any of us from being humbled by a child, or a bird.

Fear of Change

I find that at a certain point in my 'evolution' I passed my teachers... and found children speaking the truths I needed to hear, or the checkout clerk... or a sign post had the words that spoke into my thoughts, and I found my eyes focusing on them without real-eyesing why.

Now is the age of the spirit that imbues us all. everyone must be able to discern whether or not a truth resonates with you, or not.

the fear of change often manifests physically as pain. the conscious mind believes it would love to do away with the pain... while subconsciously we are choosing to continue to experience it rather than go further.

When I first opened my crown, I can remember feeling my awareness shift between my pure lighted crown, and all the lower chakras. it was like the lower were screaming 'don't let in all this light!'. yet it felt so divine, I did.

It awakened boatloads of fear. everything felt sexually charged, violent... everything seemed to be dying... it is these feelings that loom beneith and behind the change. While the pains may seem unendurable, they are often far preferable to facing the ego death, facing a wild prana flow which seems to want sex everywhere, facing repressed anger that manifests as rage that drives people to kill, or commit suicide.

And yet it is opening to the divine that also washes these feelings clean, and allows us to start anew.

I don't share these things to scare, I share them because they are there, and it is only through awareness, and humility, and the surredner to fierce love, that we can learn to move through them.

while I honor the many 'teachers along my path, ultimately it is the friendships, the company, and the unconditional love of others that brings me through.

living love, prana, chi, is everywhere. the 'answers' are everywhere. We choose what we trust, even if we are choosin to turn over our power to another person, that was our choice to begin with.

A Dine Peyote church guide taught me that. He expressed four contradictory ideas to me within an hour, each with fierce assertion. then laugh. the lesson?

I couldn't just trust 'him'. Because he was contradicting himself. Whatever I choose to trust.

Is me.