Kylie
My TestimonialsJune 4, 2006
I love this girl. Kylie is one of the sweetest, funniest and craziest Pennsyltucky chickies I know, plus she has the best jugglies and can kiss quite well. Kylie has become one of my dearest friends in this world and I have so many awesome memories and times with her.
I love you girl!
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My ProfileGender
Female
Age
25
Location
about me
I’m an enigma! I’m a vegan, but I love the smell of BBQ. I love sleep, but rarely get enough. I’m afraid of heights, but love skydiving! I love extreme sports of all varieties, though currently my favs are skydiving and wakeboarding. I want to see the world and experience as much as possible. I don’t take myself too seriously. My favorite word is “cattywombus.” I love all things artificially grape-flavored. I’m a kickass baker, and I can even make vegan funnel cakes. I have a healthy fear of gravity. I have never lost a left sock to my dryer. I act like a complete ass or goofball a load of the time, but NEVER act or speak to me in a way that undermines my intelligence. It is the quickest and most surefire way to peeve me off!
Looks? I'm 5'5" with a curvy atheltic build if that makes any sense. I've got lovely jubblies, and I know it! I'm generally cute, but can be sexy if I want. I've got ginormous brown fawn eyes which means I could probably get away with anything if I'd want...but I don't. I am comfortable in my own skin. I've got piercings, but now only my anti-eyebrow and my nips. I can pull off funky colors in my hair, and do so from time to time. Style? Who the hell knows! Because I'm a vegan and I love bell-bottoms and sandals...and own one (just one) tye-dye shirt...people call me a lil-hippie kid. But know this: I hate patchouli, and looove to shower everyday (sometimes 2x). I can be casual, formal, cute, sexy, put-together, clashing, and extremely obnoxious. I DO own black and green day-glo tights...and I love them.
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My Blog
...of a "oh my god, scary, stock up on water and pop-tarts" kind of storm in Florida was actually quite bitter and slightly reminscent of the way your hands taste after playing with dandelions. Don't ask how I know that taste, but I'm damn certain I'm not the only one who knows it.
Sat, August 23, 2008 - 4:32 AM
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Last Sunday, the swirling mass of green, red, orange, and yellow...Fay...appeared on my TV screen for the first time. Though I received constant reassurance from weathered Floridians (get it??) that Fay wouldn... read more 
Remember when we used to skydive? You know, before tropical storm Fay started all this ridiculousness? I hoped for a hurricane party, not a Forget-Your-Name-Week. I have NO intentions of training for the Iron Liver Contest, so she needs to cut this crap out. Somebody get Fay some freakin' Redbull because her ass is draaaagging!!
Thu, August 21, 2008 - 11:49 AM
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Anyway, since it's been rumored that the most dangerous place for skydivers is on the ground, I'm here to test that theory. Long ponds are developing all ov... read more 
Surely you've all heard of that superheroine right?? Super Betty Crocker shits apple pies and sneezes meatloafs?
Wed, August 13, 2008 - 8:52 PM
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Okay, so here's the deal. This isn't a blog at all. But if you've read this far, then you clearly have some time on your hands. This is a cry for help! A plea for creativity! I'm going to a skydiving boogie in October, dubbed "Chicks Rock." Well, because..we effin' DO! Theme for the big party is "female superheroes." Unfortunately, there aren't nearly so many superher... read more
Let me count the ways. I mean, what else is a girl supposed to do when her boyfriend is out base jumping from the Perrine Bridge in Idaho for a week (without her??)??. She sits at home and sobs and awaits his every phone call. Yeah, if she’s a freakin’ loser!! However, since we are all aware of how very loser I am NOT, I managed to make better use of my time.
Tue, June 24, 2008 - 11:56 AM
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Saturday and Sunday. Admittedly not that exciting. I worked. Spent a bit of time at the grey cloud-covered river and then b... read more
Yesh, you've received proper warning and plenty of time to prepare. I've posted numerous bulletins, a barrage of texts, and a slew of emails. Be ready! I'm coming back Pennsylvania..and I've got a hankering for some Yuengling (no, I really don't...it's just a PA thing), my nostrils are itching for that fine fresh Pennsyltucky air (that oh so aromatic blend of fresh manure baking in the mid-day sun, daffodils, and rotting deer carcasses 'longside the PA turnpike), and my stomach is rumbling...
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Thu, April 10, 2008 - 6:48 AM
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My Tribes
All American Family Camp,
Bonnaroo 2007,
Burning Man,
Crafty Vixens,
Cubicle Nation,
Florida,
Florida Burners,
Harrisburg & Surrounding Communities,
Harrisburg Burner Events,
Hula Tahitian Dance,
Metaphysical Florida,
New Jersey,
obscure sports,
Orlando: The City Beautiful,
pennsyltucky,
perverCity,
Phlorida,
Piercing,
Playa Del Fuego,
Polynesian Dance,
...
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