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Ovenette

offline 141 friends
joined on 02/05/05
last updated 04/14/09
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bloggity-blog-log entries

"I think younger workers—first of all, younger workers have been promised benefits the government—promises that have been promised, benefits that we can't keep. That's just the way it is."—Washington, D.C., May 4, 2005

with the recent appraisal of our country's economic fitness, I'd like some options, alternatives for retirement. anyone?? where to go...

there's no way I'm staying in this country another ten years even. this is really getting serious. as of Jan 1, 2008, our baby-boomer... read more
Fri, March 21, 2008 - 7:55 PM permalink - 1 comment
 
During the latest environmental crisis I've grown a certain fondness for the paper towel. It has long been a commodity, a prominent member of the paper product family, that I have grown to trust and admire for its functional durability and selfless disposability. Over the years I've come to rely on the towel for my everyday household needs. Its strength and light-weight portability makes it so convenient for transport on long trips. I often carry along a few of them, moistened, in a Ziplocs... read more
Tue, February 26, 2008 - 11:42 AM permalink - 2 comments
 
"A lot of times in the rhetoric, people forget the facts. And the facts are that thousands of small businesses—Hispanically owned or otherwise—pay taxes at the highest marginal rate."—to the Hispanic Chamber of Commerce; Washington, D.C., March 19, 2001
George W. Bush
Tue, October 9, 2007 - 7:57 PM permalink - 7 comments
 
...Two men raised an orphan lion cub, but they raised it with the intention of releasing it back into the wilds. So they did their best to not just feed and take care of it, but to teach it to hunt like it's mother would have. When the lion got big enough, it was let go deep in the savannah and left to fend for itself.

Later the two young men started to wonder if the lion they had released had survived or not, and because of the deep personal attachment they had to it they hired a tracke... read more
Mon, October 8, 2007 - 6:49 PM permalink - 2 comments
 
My date with Gavin Newsom and the greater part of an evening in San Francisco

Thu, October 4, 2007 - 4:29 PM
The lucky caller of Ruby Rod's 98.7 KISS fm radio contest last week, Gavin 10-10 Newsom, a modest gentleman and Mayor of San Francisco, won a date with me for a romantic escape throughout the city, a fundraising endeavor supporting my favorite local charities and humanitarian efforts. And it was quite a dating adventure. I have to admit.

Originally, Mr. Newsom, or as he ... read more
Thu, October 4, 2007 - 4:29 PM permalink - 2 comments
 
Thanksgiving Prayer
"To Jack Dillinger and hope he is still alive.
Thanksgiving Day November 28 1986"


Thanks for the wild turkey and
the passenger pigeons,
destined to be shit out
through wholesome American guts.


Thanks for a continent to despoil
and poison.

Thanks for Indians to provide a
modicum of challenge and
danger.

Thanks for vast herds of bison to
kill and skin leaving the
carcasses to rot.

Thanks for bounties on wolves
and coyotes.

Th... read more
Wed, September 19, 2007 - 11:51 PM permalink - 1 comment
 
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the name is katrina

about me
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peanuts

February 19, 2006
I feel compelled to add to what I said earlier, which I believe failed to capture the essence. Katrina is at a libration point, equipoised between body, mind and spirit. She seeks and is able to provide to other beings all these things: physical pleasure, intellectual depth (with an emphasis on aesthetic critical analysis), and a quest for something more. She is a seeker. And a giver of joy.
February 5, 2006
A great sage, Curious Jim (may he rest in peace), once said, " Katrina is not just a pretty face. She's wicked smart and some kind of freaky art savant. The complete package."

I would humbly add that while Katrina has a deep appreciation of art and history and such, qualities that cannot be gainsaid, what she truly excels at is being the cat's pajamas! I would like to perch on her shoulder, recite Pliny, and gently nibble on her earlobe.
Unsu...
 
Unsu...
 
December 23, 2005
Haven't met this enigma wrapped in a conundrum wrapped in a nice flaky pastry...but I wanna. Her brain is just so goddam sexy...I want to mate with it and make little gray baby brains, with English accents.
October 25, 2005
I think she's kinda funny.
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Frederick's blog

America is a rhetorical republic. Our people are united not by ethnicity, institutions, territory, nor even, as is becoming evident, language, but rather by narrative – specifically, epic narrative; more specifically, Biblical epic; and more specifically still, America identifies itself nationally in terms of the grand Biblical epic of Exodus. To be sure, others have appealed to Exodus – the Voortrekkers of 19th century South Africa and the civil rights marchers of 20th century America are two neatly opposed instances – but no other great nation has modeled itself on the migration led by Moses from Egyptian servitude across the desert to the Promised Land. If Exodus tells us who we are in general terms, the Jeremiad reminds us of certain particulars. It seeks to make us aware, and even establish as the central theme of the story, that the journey is dangerous, and that we will prevail under such harsh conditions only through absolute unity and individual self-sacrifice. It reassures us that our ideals are high – that God is on our side – but also warns that any loss of faith in them – any doubt that reliance on God alone is enough to ensure our delivery to Canaan – will be severely punished. Indeed, the journey to freedom is a test of our basic beliefs, and we will be singled out for extraordinary punishment if we waver from them. Special care must therefore be taken to identify, castigate, and ostracize backsliders and others who are less than unreservedly enthusiastic about the mission. President George W. Bush and his administration have followed this narrative closely. September 11th threatened a new form of Egyptian servitude, and a trek into the desert (Afghanistan, then Iraq) was duly instigated to protect our freedom. Indeed, Bush turned out to mimic Moses in a great many details. Like Moses, Bush is prickly, defensive, and a poor speaker. Though Moses had only one brother, Aaron, to correct his garbled speech, Bush relies on a whole band of brothers – and a sister, if one adds Condoleezza Rice to Donald H. Rumsfeld, Richard V. Cheney, and Colin Powell. Moses gave his people the Ten Commandments, and Bush saw to it that the Patriot Act was brought down to Americans from the Hill, if not the Mountain. In tune with the Jeremiad, he regularly warns of the hazards that threaten and the monsters that lurk, and even supplemented his sermons with the more user-friendly color-coded Threat Level System of Homeland Security, which gets turned up or down in accordance with the administration’s desire for unity and discipline (as I write, the level is yellow, for “elevated,” like one's blood pressure). He loves nothing more than to mean-spiritedly hector those with the temerity to express skepticism about the wisdom of his advenure. But in Bush’s case, there is more to all this than mere analogy. Scholars such as Sacvan Bercovitch and Perry Miller have pointed out the way in which the Puritan Jeremiad was transformed and secularized as a central public mode of political address in America. Faith in God became fidelity to America's founding principles, and criticism took the form of attributing the nation's ills to a failure to live up to our political ideals coupled with a call to renew our commitment to them. With Bush, however, secularization doesn’t enter in. Literally like Moses, not just metaphorically, Bush hears God instructing him on policy and leadership, to the apparent awe and delight of his constituents. Bush literally believes that he has been called by God to lead his people through the wilderness to the land of milk and honey, though in this version Bush marches the faithful back to the Holy Lands for the migration to end all migrations, the “end-time” of Armageddon. The Jeremiad provides one explanation for Bush’s inability to express disappointment with the way things are turning out in Iraq. According to the Exodus-Jeremiad logic, the worse one’s suffering in the desert, the more certain one can be of God’s interest in one’s project. The hardships are provided by God expressly to test the missionaries’ faith in Him. An easy victory, in fact, would have been a disturbing indication that God was not really interested in Bush’s war. From the point of view of Bush’s fundamentalism, his horrendous record of defeat in Iraq not only offers welcome opportunities to demonstrate his and his people’s faith in their God in the face of powerful evidence that He has in fact abandoned them, but also provides confirmation that what Bush takes to be God’s voice is indeed His. The policy implication is that nothing is going to convince Bush to change course. In his heart of hearts, he truly believes: the worse, the better.
Mon, May 22, 2006 - 5:24 PM permalink
It occurred when Clinton, on January 17, 1998, in the course of his grand jury testimony for Kenneth W. Starr’s expanded Whitewater investigation, said: “It depends on what the meaning of the word ‘is’ is.” He was answering a question as to whether he wasn’t lying when, earlier, he assured one of his top aids that “there’s nothing going on between us,” i.e., Clinton and erstwhile White House intern Monica Lewinsky, or when he told PBS newscaster Jim Lehrer that “there is no improper relationship” between Lewinsky and him. Now, logicians distinguish three "modes" of the word “is”: the existential, the predicative, and the “is” of identity. One can say of something that it is in the sense that it exists, such as when the believer asserts that “God is” (existential). Or one can say of something that it possesses a certain property, as when the geologist states that a particular rock is reddish, light, and porous (predicative). Finally, one can say of something that it is the same as x, as when the astronomer says that Venus is the morning star or Lois Lane says that Clark Kent is Superman (identity). But these distinctions are not what Clinton had in mind. He was concerned with the grammar of “is,” specifically its indication of the present tense and the fact that since, by the time he made his statements about Lewinsky, their sexual relationship had ended, what he said, given that it referred to the present, was strictly true. Clearly, Clinton did not say: “There was no improper relationship.” He even went so far as to implicitly admit that “if 'is' means is and never has been,” then he had lied. But, of course, as a matter of grammar, “is” doesn’t behave that way. Whether considered as simple present, active or passive, or present progressive, active or passive, Clinton’s denial that there “is” an improper relationship was, when he issued it, by all accounts true. Even though what mattered to Clinton, so far as “is” was concerned, was grammar not modality, it’s nonetheless worth noting that the mode of “is” in question was existential. The issue was whether a sexual relationship between Lewinsky and Clinton is, whether such a relationship exists or is non-existent and by extension the question of what it means that things are, that there is something rather than nothing. And that is precisely the question that Heidegger attempts to re-assert beginning with "Sein und Zeit" (1927): the question of the meaning of being, the significance of the fact, which is more than one fact among others, that quite apart from their properties and identities, their characteristics and behavior, their origins, causes, effects, and purposes, their structures and functions, things just are. True, Clinton raised the issue in a regrettably tawdry context, and neglected to develop it very far, but he did raise it. It is to be hoped that, among the projects of Clinton’s presidential library, some consideration is being given to furthering his legacy as a thinker of the relationship between being, or isness, and language by supporting further inquiry into these questions.
Wed, March 29, 2006 - 1:34 AM permalink
MySpace.com is a web-based communications network featuring software tools that enable its members to create “profiles” of themselves, that is, public personae, not only in the form of verbal information but also by means of a variety of expressive media such as digital images, video, and music. Indeed, the sheer act of presenting (or representing) oneself is a central activity of MySpace members. In addition to profiling themselves, however, members may also attract other members, who become their “friends,” and contact friends already in their network. Contact takes the form of posting commentary and testimonia on profiles (which are retained or deleted at the profiler’s discretion), which may then be commented on in turn by the profiler or others. The effect is to bring into being a “community” – if that is the right term – that is powerfully centered on individuals and their performance, through the expressive media available to them, of their own personalities. There is nothing necessarily “confessional” about this, though the occasional confession may take place; the atmosphere is more akin to the theatrical: what matters are the style, the stance, the intensity, and attraction of the personalities who appear to one another. Because the performances of their identities are “witnessed,” albeit virtually, by others, the question of who one is has as much to do with the opinions of others as with the raw data of one’s own profile. Seeing and being seen, in other words, or what the social interaction design theorist Adrian Chan characterizes as “presence” – presence constituted through the participation of witnesses who form judgments and comment on what they see – is what matters. What sort of a “space” is MySpace, then? Some have pointed out that it is not a public space, because the kind of talk that goes on in it is anything but rational deliberation aimed at reaching a consensus on a matter of common concern. (When I asked my 16-year-old daughter whether anyone on MySpace discussed politics, she looked at me in silence but with an expression of grave concern for my mental well-being.) But this is to invoke an overly narrow conception of public space and its value. For a more expansive perspective, we can turn to the insights of Hannah Arendt, one of the few truly original political philosophers of the last century. For her, the point of establishing a public space is to enable the experience of freedom and the appearance of individual distinction. Freedom – that is, spontaneous, creative, unscripted activity in speech or deed – is possible to the extent that purely instrumental enterprises, activities that are valuable and meaningful only because they contribute to the achievement of a pre-established goal, are excluded. That exclusion is in large part what constitutes a public space. The participants in a public space come together for the sheer intrinsic pleasure of interacting with one another – seeing and being seen. Since nobody is in charge, there are neither leaders nor followers, but only peers who are at the same time actors and who might, if they are sufficiently impressive, become leaders of a sort and for a time. What matters here is the quality of an actor’s performance, above all his performance of his identity. That, of course, is a matter of taste, an aesthetic judgment, and Arendt insisted that the kind of commentary appropriate to what goes on in public is closer to literary criticism – how does this or that strike us, what does it mean? – than to the application of universal principles in accordance with the rules of rational argumentation. To a great extent, this is the world of MySpace. Undoubtedly, there are many members who are more concerned with blending in than standing out, and so have little interest in what Arendt characterized as the “fiercely agonal spirit” that dominated what was for her the exemplary public space of the ancient Athenian polis. Nevertheless, agonism is very much on offer in the drive towards self-display, to distinguish oneself from others, to be noticed, to attract an audience, and to do so, again, in freedom – in a non-regulated environment where the only authority is that constituted momentarily by the expressed judgments of witnesses, such that whatever consensus might temporarily be achieved could be undermined at any time by the introduction of a fresh point of view. As the digital communications theorist Danah Boyd has pointed out, it is no accident that it is young people, primarily teenagers, who have flocked to MySpace. Of course, they call what they do there “hanging out” and being “cool,” not the enactment of freedom. But perhaps they should. Their lives are, after all, profoundly characterized by the two elements that Arendt found most inimical to freedom: subjection to an external, undebatable goal, and regulation by means of rulership and rules. From school to home, this picture changes very little for today’s teenagers, for whom the steady parental and political drumbeat to organize their entire lives according to the imperative of enhancing their future marketability must be very close to unbearable. Readers of Arendt, however, will no doubt be thinking at this point that Arendt herself was adamant that children must be protected from the potential calamities of the public sphere and its freedom. The public sphere is, she pointed out, essentially anarchic, because no one can predict or control the consequences of what is said and done there. Who one is as a public figure depends on reputation, and a reputation can go overnight from good to bad. Adults can decide to take on the risks of appearing in public, but children need a stabler, safer, more predictable world. If it were only a matter of reputation, we might be inclined to regard Arendt’s views on children as merely quaint. Today’s teenagers cannot avoid an education in freedom – that is, in imagination and spontaneity – for nothing less will equip them with the spiritual resources to find meaning in a cold and lonely society (certainly not Creationism or Intelligent Design). But as the news media and politicians have lately insisted, there are other dangers that come along with the freedom of expression and communication provided by sites like MySpace – though it is also clear that these dangers have been hysterically exaggerated. Education, awareness, and forms of accountability are clearly in order. But it would be a travesty if, in the name of safety and security, measures were taken to suppress the very features by means of which MySpace shelters freedom for self-assertion and self-development for a generation badly in need of it.
Sat, March 11, 2006 - 7:17 PM permalink
Last year saw the publication of Harry G. Frankfurt’s "On Bullshit" (Princeton, 2005), a tongue-in-cheek but sincere effort to articulate the concept of bullshit. Since then some spinoffs have appeared, such as Laura Penny’s "Your Call Is Important to Us" (Crown, 2005) and "Why Business People Speak Like Idiots" by Brian Fugere, Chelsea Hardaway, and Jon Warshawsky (Free Press, 2005). As these titles suggest, the focus is on bullshit that originates in the officeplace rather than the world of politics, which is unexpected to those of us for whom George Orwell’s "Politics and the English Language" (1946) is the canonical study of the subject, but is also perhaps telling. I’m troubled by this zeal to identify bullshit because it seems to me that there probably is nothing other than bullshit. Frankfurt defines bullshit as pretending that you know what you’re talking about when in fact you don’t. But that strikes me as a good description of human communication as such. Compassion dictates that one appear confident in what one is saying. Every parent learns this early on; nothing is more terrifying to young children than the idea that they are being cared for by people who don’t really know what life is about. So one learns to mime the self-confidence that is demanded. But the rule holds for all ages. Uncertainty is disturbing, and we love to hear from those who convincingly ape a command of relevant facts and concepts. It’s all a mere mummer’s play, but we couldn’t do without it. That the answer to “Is There Anything Besides Bullshit?” is “No” captures something important in the position expressed by the early Wittgenstein in his "Tractatus Logico-Philosophicus" (1927), which held that what matters can’t be put into words, and that what can be put into words doesn’t matter. On this view, any verbal performance that is more ambitious than the sheer stating of fact (“such-and-such is the case”) is bullshit. But – is it possible not to go beyond the facts? Doesn’t the assertion of even a purely factual statement imply a judgment that these facts and not others that might be mentioned are significant from one or another point of view? Indeed, isn't everything that we think of as “culture” and “science” and “scholarship” and “expert opinion” a matter of going beyond the facts – generalizing, inferring, postulating? Modern physics would be bullshit, on this view, to say nothing of religion, law, literature, and social science (which most of us are already prepared to acknowledge are bullshit). To find our way in this imbroglio, we would have to define “bullshit” more carefully. It is true that everything we (really want to) say is bullshit. But not all bullshit is equal. Some bullshit goes beyond the facts in ways that are benign, and even beneficial. In these worlds, there is an ongoing contest among bullshits as to which we will accept and which we will abandon at any given moment. Here, we can even admire extraordinary bullshit artists without in any way being convinced that their bullshit is true. There is a place for such bullshitters in this world. Other bullshit goes beyond the facts in an insidious way: by making it appear that its inferences and postulates and generalizations possess the force of facts. So, to answer the question: No, there is nothing besides bullshit, but some kinds of bullshit are worse than others, and a great deal is at stake in exposing the worst as such. On the other hand, a great deal is also at stake in recognizing the way in which, despite the difference among bullshits, everything we say is, in the end, bullshit. At a time when more and more people seem all too ready to believe that some talk is not bullshit – that some talk, for example, is the unalloyed word of (their) god – this is this lesson that seems especially urgent to learn. At the same time, however, the significant minority of relativists need to be reminded that some bullshit is deadlier than the rest, and that their very commitment to relativism enjoins them to identify this bullshit and heap scorn upon it. On the other hand, one might say that the very idea that there is good bullshit and bad bullshit is itself bullshit.
Wed, March 1, 2006 - 8:34 PM permalink
All readers of Vladimir Nabokov are astonished by his extraordinary ear for American speech in all its varieties. In "Lolita," though, there is what appears to be a curious anomaly. On two or three occasions, Humbert Humbert informs us that he stopped at a “candy bar” to purchase sweets for Lolita. So far as I know, a candy bar is something you eat, not a place to buy candy. Is this is a slip on Nabokov’s part? In a sense, it’s impossible to say, because Humbert is the narrator and the slip might just as well (or even more plausibly) be attributed to him. Or perhaps it isn’t a slip – perhaps there are or were such places as candy bars. But it’s a usage I’ve never encountered.
Sun, February 26, 2006 - 4:40 PM permalink
originally published at My Blog
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Dreaming-Bear Blog

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Edward's brain dump

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Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy

If they ever come up with a swashbuckling School, I think one of the courses should be Laughing, Then Jumping Off Something.

When you're riding in a time machine way far into the future, don't stick your elbow out the window, or it'll turn into a fossil.

It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.

At first I thought, if I were Superman, a perfect secret identity would be "Clark Kent, Dentist," because you could save money on tooth X-rays. But then I thought, if a patient said, "How's my back tooth?" and you just looked at it with your X-ray vision and said, "Oh it's okay," then the patient would probably say, "Aren't you going to take an X-ray, stupid?" and you'd say, "Aw fuck you, get outta here," and then he probably wouldn't even pay his bill.

One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. "Oh, no," I said. "Disneyland burned down." He cried and cried, but I think that deep down, he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late.

A good way to threaten somebody is to light a stick of dynamite. Then you call the guy and hold the burning fuse up to the phone. "Hear that?" you say. "That's dynamite, baby."

Why do people in ship mutinies always ask for "better treatment"? I'd ask for a pinball machine, because with all that rocking back and forth you'd probably be able to get a lot of free games.

I'd like to be buried Indian-style, where they put you up on a high rack, above the ground. That way, you could get hit by meteorites and not even feel it.

If I lived back in the wild west days, instead of carrying a six-gun in my holster, I'd carry a soldering iron. That way, if some smart-aleck cowboy said something like "Hey, look. He's carrying a soldering iron!" and started laughing, and everybody else started laughing, I could just say, "That's right, it's a soldering iron. The soldering iron of justice." Then everybody would get real quiet and ashamed, because they had made fun of the soldering iron of justice, and I could probably hit them up for a free drink.

I bet when the neanderthal kids would make a snowman, someone would always end up saying, "Don't forget the thick, heavy brows." Then they would all get embarrassed because they remembered they had the big hunky brows too, and they'd get mad and eat the snowman.

Fear can sometimes be a useful emotion. For instance, let's say you're an astronaught on the moon and you fear that your partner has been turned into Dracula. The next time he goes out for the moon pieces, wham!, you just slam the door behind him and blast off. He might call you on the radio and say he's not Dracula, but you just say, "Think again, bat man."

Too bad you can't buy a voodoo globe so that you could make the earth spin real fast and freak everybody out.

The people in the village were real poor, so none of the children had any toys. But this one little boy had gotten an old enema bag and filled it with rocks, and he would go around and whap the other children across the face with it. Man, I think my heart almost broke. Later the boy came up and offered to give me the toy. This was too much! I reached out my hand, but then he ran away. I chased him down and took the enema bag. He cried a little, but that's the way of these people.

I wish I had a Kryptonite cross, because then you could keep both Dracula AND Superman away.

I don't think I'm alone when I say I'd like to see more and more planets fall under the ruthless domination of our solar system.

Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis.

Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself: "Mankind". Basically, it's made up of two separate words - "mank" and "ind". What do these words mean ? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind.

I hope if dogs ever take over the world, and they chose a king, they don't just go by size, because I bet there are some Chihuahuas with some good ideas.

I guess we were all guilty, in a way. We all shot him, we all skinned him, and we all got a complimentary bumper sticker that said, "I helped skin Bob."

I bet the main reason the police keep people away from a plane crash is they don't want anybody walking in and lying down in the crash stuff, then, when somebody comes up, act like they just woke up and go, "What was THAT?!"

The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.

Ambition is like a frog sitting on a Venus Flytrap. The flytrap can bite and bite, but it won't bother the frog because it only has little tiny plant teeth. But some other stuff could happen and it could be like ambition.

I'd rather be rich than stupid.

If you were a poor Indian with no weapons, and a bunch of conquistadors came up to you and asked where the gold was, I don't think it would be a good idea to say, "I swallowed it. So sue me."

If you define cowardice as running away at the first sign of danger, screaming and tripping and begging for mercy, then yes, Mr. Brave man, I guess I'm a coward.

I bet one legend that keeps recurring throughout history, in every culture, is the story of Popeye.

When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges.

To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other.

What is it that makes a complete stranger dive into an icy river to save a solid gold baby? Maybe we'll never know.

We tend to scoff at the beliefs of the ancients. But we can't scoff at them personally, to their faces, and this is what annoys me.

Probably the earliest flyswatters were nothing more than some sort of striking surface attached to the end of a long stick.

I think someone should have had the decency to tell me the luncheon was free. To make someone run out with potato salad in his hand, pretending he's throwing up, is not what I call hospitality.

To me, clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kind of scary. I've wondered where this started and I think it goes back to the time I went to the circus, and a clown killed my dad.

As I bit into the nectarine, it had a crisp juiciness about it that was very pleasurable - until I realized it wasn't a nectarine at all, but A HUMAN HEAD!!

Most people don't realize that large pieces of coral, which have been painted brown and attached to the skull by common wood screws, can make a child look like a deer.

If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.

Better not take a dog on the space shuttle, because if he sticks his head out when you're coming home his face might burn up.

You know what would make a good story? Something about a clown who make people happy, but inside he's real sad. Also, he has severe diarrhea.

Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to calm myself down. I'll go over to the persons house and ring the doorbell. When the person comes to the door, I'm gone, but you know what I've left on the porch? A jack-o-lantern with a knife stuck in the side of it's head with a note that says "You." After that I usually feel a lot better, and no harm done.

If you're a horse, and someone gets on you, and falls off, and then gets right back on you, I think you should buck him off right away.

If you ever teach a yodeling class, probably the hardest thing is to keep the students from just trying to yodel right off. You see, we build to that.

If you ever fall off the Sears Tower, just go real limp, because maybe you'll look like a dummy and people will try to catch you because, hey, free dummy.

I'd like to see a nude opera, because when they hit those high notes, I bet you can really see it in those genitals.

Anytime I see something screech across a room and latch onto someones neck, and the guy screams and tries to get it off, I have to laugh, because what is that thing.

He was a cowboy, mister, and he loved the land. He loved it so much he made a woman out of dirt and married her. But when he kissed her, she disintegrated. Later, at the funeral, when the preacher said, "Dust to dust," some people laughed, and the cowboy shot them. At his hanging, he told the others, "I'll be waiting for you in heaven--with a gun."

The memories of my family outings are still a source of strength to me. I remember we'd all pile into the car - I forget what kind it was - and drive and drive. I'm not sure where we'd go, but I think there were some trees there. The smell of something was strong in the air as we played whatever sport we played. I remember a bigger, older guy we called "Dad." We'd eat some stuff, or not, and then I think we went home. I guess some things never leave you.

If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is "Probably because of something you did."

Contrary to what most people say, the most dangerous animal in the world is not the lion or the tiger or even the elephant. It's a shark riding on an elephant's back, just trampling and eating everything they see.

As we were driving, we saw a sign that said "Watch for Rocks." Marta said it should read "Watch for Pretty Rocks." I told her she should write in her suggestion to the highway department, but she started saying it was a joke - just to get out of writing a simple letter! And I thought I was lazy!

One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to DisneyLand, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. "Oh, no," I said, "DisneyLand burned down." He cried and cried, but I think that deep down he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real DisneyLand, but it was getting pretty late.

If you saw two guys named Hambone and Flippy, which one would you think liked dolphins the most? I'd say Flippy, wouldn't you? You'd be wrong, though. It's Hambone.

Laurie got offended that I used the word "puke." But to me, that's what her dinner tasted like.

We used to laugh at Grandpa when he'd head off and go fishing. But we wouldn't be laughing that evening when he'd come back with some whore he picked up in town.

I wish a robot would get elected president. That way, when he came to town, we could all take a shot at him and not feel too bad.

As the evening sky faded from a salmon color to a sort of flint gray, I thought back to the salmon I caught that morning, and how gray he was, and how I named him Flint.

If you're a young Mafia gangster out on your first date, I bet it's real embarrassing if someone tries to kill you.

Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. But then I think, what is I was an ant, and she fell on me. Then it wouldn't seem quite so funny.

If you go parachuting, and your parachute doesn't open, and you friends are all watching you fall, I think a funny gag would be to pretend you were swimming.

When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all go play in his cave, and every once in a while he would eat one of us. It wasn't until later that I found out that Uncle Caveman was a bear.

Children need encouragement. If a kid gets an answer right, tell him it was a lucky guess. That way he develops a good, lucky feeling.

The crows seemed to be calling his name, thought Caw.

When you die, if you get a choice between going to regular heaven or pie heaven, choose pie heaven. It might be a trick, but if it's not, mmmmmmm, boy.

Whether they find a life there or not, I think Jupiter should be called an enemy planet.

Instead of trying to build newer and bigger weapons of destruction, we should be thinking about getting more use out of the ones we already have.

I think a good gift for the President would be a chocolate revolver. and since he is so busy, you'd probably have to run up to him real quick and give it to him.

Just because swans mate for life, I don't think its that big a deal. First of all, if you're a swan, you're probably not going to find a swan that looks much better than the one you've got, so why not mate for life?

If you're robbing a bank and you're pants fall down, I think it's okay to laugh and to let the hostages laugh too, because, come on, life is funny.

If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I bet that will really throw you into a panic.

Sometimes I think I'd be better off dead. No, wait, not me, you.

I can't stand cheap people. It makes me real mad when someone says something like, "Hey, when are you going to pay me that $100 you owe me?" or "Do you have that $50 you borrowed?" Man, quit being so cheap!

I think the mistake a lot of us make is thinking the state-appointed shrink is our friend.

I think one way the cops could make money would be to hold a murder weapons sale. Many people could really use used ice picks.

If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet you could shoot beer out of you nose.

I believe in making the world safe for our children, but not our children's children, because I don't think children should be having sex.

Even though I was their captive, the Indians allowed me quite a bit of freedom. I could walk freely, make my own meals, and even hurl large rocks at their heads. It was only later that I discovered that they were not Indians at all but only dirty-clothes hampers.

I wish outer space guys would conquer the Earth and make people their pets, because I'd like to have one of those little beds with my name on it.

It's true that every time you hear a bell, an angel gets its wings. But what they don't tell you is that every time you hear a mouse trap snap, and Angel gets set on fire.

If you're in a war, instead of throwing a hand grenade at the enemy, throw one of those small pumpkins. Maybe it'll make everyone think how stupid war is, and while they are thinking, you can throw a real grenade at them.

I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.

The next time I have meat and mashed potatoes, I think I'll put a very large blob of potatoes on my plate with just a little piece of meat. And if someone asks me why I didn't get more meat, I'll just say, "Oh, you mean this?" and pull out a big piece of meat from inside the blob of potatoes, where I've hidden it. Good magic trick, huh?

Life, to me, is like a quiet forest pool, one that needs a direct hit from a big rock half-buried in the ground. You pull and you pull, but you can't get the rock out of the ground. So you give it a good kick, but you lose your balance and go skidding down the hill toward the pool. Then out comes a big Hawaiian man who was screwing his wife beside the pool because they thought it was real pretty. He tells you to get out of there, but you start faking it, like you're talking Hawaiian, and then he gets mad and chases you...

Sometimes, when I drive across the desert in the middle of the night, with no other cars around, I start imagining: What if there were no civilization out there? No cities, no factories, no people? And then I think: No people or factories? Then who made this car? And this highway? And I get so confused I have to stick my head out the window into the driving rain---unless there's lightning, because I could get struck on the head by a bolt.

The whole town laughed at my great-grandfather, just because he worked hard and saved his money. True, working at the hardware store didn't pay much, but he felt it was better than what everybody else did, which was go up to the volcano and collect the gold nuggets it shot out every day. It turned out he was right. After forty years, the volcano petered out. Everybody left town, and the hardware store went broke. Finally he decided to collect gold nuggets too, but there weren't many left by then. Plus, he broke his leg and the doctor's bills were real high.

Too bad when I was a kid there wasn't a guy in our class that everybody called the "Cricket Boy", because I would have liked to stand up in class and tell everybody, "You can make fun of the Cricket Boy if you want to, but to me he's just like everybody else." Then everybody would leave the Cricket Boy alone, and I'd invite him over to spend the night at my house, but after about five minutes of that loud chirping I'd have to kick him out. Maybe later we could get up a petition to get the Cricket Family run out of town. Bye, Cricket Boy.

I think a good product would be "Baby Duck Hat". It's a fake baby duck, which you strap on top of your head. Then you go swimming underwater until you find a mommy duck and her babies, and you join them. Then, all of a sudden, you stand up out of the water and roar like Godzilla. Man, those ducks really take off! Also, Baby Duck Hat is good for parties.

I wish I lived back in the old west days, because I'd save up my money for about twenty years so I could buy a solid-gold pick. Then I'd go out West and start digging for gold. When someone came up and asked what I was doing, I'd say, "Looking for gold, ya durn fool." He'd say, "Your pick is gold," and I'd say, "Well, that was easy." Good joke, huh.

A funny thing to do is, if you're out hiking and your friend gets bitten by a poisonous snake, tell him you're going to go for help, then go about ten feet and pretend that *you* got bit by a snake. Then start an argument with him about who's going to go get help. A lot of guys will start crying. That's why it makes you feel good when you tell them it was just a joke.

I guess I kinda lost control, because in the middle of the play I ran up and lit the evil puppet villain on fire. No, I didn't. Just kidding. I just said that to help illustrate one of the human emotions, which is freaking out. Another emotion is greed, as when you kill someone for money, or something like that. Another emotion is generosity, as when you pay someone double what he paid for his stupid puppet.

Many people think that history is a dull subject. Dull? Is it "dull" that Jesse James once got bitten on the forehead by an ant, and at first it didn't seem like anything, but then the bite got worse and worse, so he went to a doctor in town, and the secretary told him to wait, so he sat down and waited, and waited, and waited, and waited, and then finally he got to see the doctor, and the doctor put some salve on it? You call that dull?

I scrambled to the top of the precipice where Nick was waiting. "That was fun," I said. "You bet it was," said Nick. "Let's climb higher." "No," I said. "I think we should be heading back now." "We have time," Nick insisted. I said we didn't, and Nick said we did. We argued back and forth like that for about 20 minutes, then finally decided to head back. I didn't say it was an interesting story.

If you're a Thanksgiving dinner, but you don't like the stuffing or the cranberry sauce or anything else, just pretend like you're eating it, but instead, put it all in your lap and form it into a big mushy ball. Then, later, when you're out back having cigars with the boys, let out a big fake cough and throw the ball to the ground. Then say, "Boy, these are good cigars!"

I remember that one fateful day when Coach took me aside. I knew what was coming. "You don't have to tell me," I said. "I'm off the team, aren't I?" "Well," said Coach, "you never were really ON the team. You made that uniform you're wearing out of rags and towels, and your helmet is a toy space helmet. You show up at practice and then either steal the ball and make us chase you to get it back, or you try to tackle people at inappropriate times." It was all true what he was saying. And yet, I thought something is brewing inside the head of this Coach. He sees something in me, some kind of raw talent that he can mold. But that's when I felt the handcuffs go on.

If I ever opened a trampoline store, I don't think I'd call it Trampo-Land, because you might think it was a store for tramps, which is not the inpression we are trying to convey with our store. On the other hand, we would not prohibit tramps from browsing, or testing the trampolines, unless a tramp's gyrations seemed to be getting out of control.

I can still recall old Mister Barnslow getting out every morning and nailing a fresh load of tadpoles to the old board of his. Then he'd spin it round and round, like a wheel of fortune, and no matter where it stopped he'd yell out, "Tadpoles! Tadpoles is a winner!" We all thought he was crazy. But then we had some growing up to do.

Once when I was in Hawaii, on the island of Kauai, I met a mysterious old stranger. He said he was about to die and wanted to tell someone about the treasure. I said, "Okay, as long as it's not a long story. Some of us have a plane to catch, you know." He stared telling hes story, about the treasure and his life and all, and I thought: "This story isn't too long." But then, he kept going, and I started thinking, "Uh-oh, this story is getting long." But then the story was over, and I said to myself: "You know, that story wasn't too long after all." I forget what the story was about, but there was a good movie on the plane. It was a little long, though.

I bet a fun thing would be to go way back in time to where there was going to be an eclipse and tell the cave men, "If I have come to destroy you, may the sun be blotted out from the sky." Just then the eclipse would start, and they'd probably try to kill you or something, but then you could explain about the rotation of the moon and all, and everyone would get a good laugh.

I wouldn't be surprised if someday some fishermen caught a big shark and cut it open, and there inside was a whole person. Then they cut the person open, and in him is a little baby shark. And in the baby shark there isn't a person, because it would be too small. But there's a little doll or something, like a Johnny Combat little toy guy---something like that.

collapse module

just a few

"The Senate needs to leave enough money in the proposed budget to not only reduce all marginal rates, but to eliminate the death tax, so that people who build up assets are able to transfer them from one generation to the next, regardless of a person's race."—Washington, D.C., April 5, 2001

"I've coined new words, like, misunderstanding and Hispanically."—Radio-Television Correspondents Association dinner, Washington, D.C., March 29, 2001

"A lot of times in the rhetoric, people forget the facts. And the facts are that thousands of small businesses—Hispanically owned or otherwise—pay taxes at the highest marginal rate."—to the Hispanic Chamber of Commerce; Washington, D.C., March 19, 2001

"Then I went for a run with the other dog and just walked. And I started thinking about a lot of things. I was able to—I can't remember what it was. Oh, the inaugural speech, started thinking through that."—Pre-inaugural interview with U.S. News & World Report, Jan. 22, 2001 issue

"I want it to be said that the Bush administration was a results-oriented administration, because I believe the results of focusing our attention and energy on teaching children to read and having an education system that's responsive to the child and to the parents, as opposed to mired in a system that refuses to change, will make America what we want it to be—a literate country and a hopefuller country."—Washington, D.C., Jan. 11, 2001

"Natural gas is hemispheric. I like to call it hemispheric in nature because it is a product that we can find in our neighborhoods."—Austin, Texas, Dec. 20, 2000

"The legislature's job is to write law. It's the executive branch's job to interpret law."—Austin, Texas, Nov. 22, 2000

"They misunderestimated me."—Bentonville, Ark., Nov. 6, 2000


bushisms The president's accidental wit and wisdom.

The Complete Bushisms
Updated frequently.
By Jacob Weisberg
Updated Friday, Dec. 23, 2005, at 11:41 AM ET

"If you found somebody that had information about an attack on America, you'd want to know as best as we can to find out what the facts are."—Philadelphia, Pa., Dec. 12, 2005

"I think we are welcomed. But it was not a peaceful welcome."—Philadelphia, Dec. 12, 2005, on the reception of American forces in Iraq

"I mean, I read the newspaper. I mean, I can tell you what the headlines are. I must confess, if I think the story is, like, not a fair appraisal, I'll move on. But I know what the story's about." —Philadelphia, Dec. 12, 2005

"[I]t's a myth to think I don't know what's going on. It's a myth to think that I'm not aware that there's opinions that don't agree with mine, because I'm fully aware of that."—Philadelphia, Dec. 12, 2005

"I mean, there was a serious international effort to say to Saddam Hussein, you're a threat. And the 9/11 attacks extenuated that threat, as far as I—concerned."—Philadelphia, Dec. 12, 2005


"Those who enter the country illegally violate the law."
—Tucson, Ariz., Nov. 28, 2005

"We got the best workforce in America—in the world."
—Washington, D.C., Dec. 2, 2005

"As a matter of fact, I know relations between our governments is good."—On U.S.-South Korean relations, Washington, D.C., Nov. 8, 2005

"Let me be very clear about this. Steroids ought to be banned from baseball."—Washington, D.C., Oct. 4, 2005

"Bin Laden says his own role is to tell Muslims, quote, 'what is good for them and what is not.' "—Washington, D.C., Oct. 6, 2005


"I think it's important to bring somebody from outside the system, the judicial system, somebody that hasn't been on the bench and, therefore, there's not a lot of opinions for people to look at." —On the nomination of Harriet Miers to the Supreme Court, Washington, D.C., October 4, 2005


"We look forward to hearing your vision, so we can more better do our job. That's what I'm telling you."—Gulfport, Miss., Sept. 20, 2005.

"Listen, I want to thank leaders of the—in the faith—faith-based and community-based community for being here."—Washington, D.C., Sept. 6, 2005.


"If it were to rain a lot, there is concern from the Army Corps of Engineers that the levees might break. And so, therefore, we're cautious about encouraging people to return at this moment of history."—Washington, D.C., Sept. 19, 2005

"My thoughts are, we're going to get somebody who knows what they're talking about when it comes to rebuilding cities."—On how the rebuilding of New Orleans might commence, Biloxi, Miss., Sept. 2, 2005

"And Brownie, you're doing a heck of a job."—To FEMA director Mike Brown who resigned 10 days later amid criticism over his job performance.—Mobile, Ala., Sept. 2, 2005


"Out of the rubbles of Trent Lott's house—he's lost his entire house—there's going to be a fantastic house. And I'm looking forward to sitting on the porch." —Mobile, Ala., Sept. 2, 2005

"I can't wait to join you in the joy of welcoming neighbors back into neighborhoods, and small businesses up and running, and cutting those ribbons that somebody is creating new jobs."—Poplarville, Miss., Sept. 5, 2005


"So please give cash money to organizations that are directly involved in helping save lives—save the life who had been affected by Hurricane Katrina."—Washington D.C., Sept. 6, 2005


"The best place for the facts to be done is by somebody who's spending time investigating it."—Expressing hope that the probe into how CIA agent Valerie Plame's identity was leaked will yield answers, Washington D.C., July 18, 2005


"I'm looking forward to a good night's sleep on the soil of a friend."—On the prospect of visiting Denmark, Washington D.C., June 29, 2005

"I was going to say he's a piece of work, but that might not translate too well. Is that all right, if I call you a 'piece of work'?"—To Jean-Claude Juncker, prime minister of Luxembourg, Washington, D.C., June 20, 2005


"You see, not only did the attacks help accelerate a recession, the attacks reminded us that we are at war."—Washington, D.C., June 8, 2005

"We're spending money on clean coal technology. Do you realize we've got 250 million years of coal?"—Washington, D.C., June 8, 2005


"I think younger workers—first of all, younger workers have been promised benefits the government—promises that have been promised, benefits that we can't keep. That's just the way it is."—Washington, D.C., May 4, 2005

"We got people working all their life at hard work, contributing by payroll taxes into a Social Security system."—Washington, D.C., May 13, 2005


"See, in my line of work you got to keep repeating things over and over and over again for the truth to sink in, to kind of catapult the propaganda."—Greece, N.Y., May 24, 2005

"It means your own money would grow better than that which the government can make it grow. And that's important."—on what private accounts could do for Social Security funds, Falls Church, Va., April 29, 2005


"But Iraq has—have got people there that are willing to kill, and they're hard-nosed killers. And we will work with the Iraqis to secure their future." —Washington, D.C., April 28, 2005


"Well, we've made the decision to defeat the terrorists abroad so we don't have to face them here at home. And when you engage the terrorists abroad, it causes activity and action."—Washington, D.C., April 28, 2005

"He understands the need for a timely write of the constitution." —on Prime Minister Iyad Allawi of Iraq, Washington, D.C., April 28, 2005

"We expect the states to show us whether or not we're achieving simple objectives—like literacy, literacy in math, the ability to read and write."—on federal education requirements, Washington, D.C., April 28, 2005

"It's in our country's interests to find those who would do harm to us and get them out of harm's way."—Washington, D.C., April 28, 2005

"Part of the facts is understanding we have a problem, and part of the facts is what you're going to do about it."—Kirtland, Ohio, April 15, 2005

"We have enough coal to last for 250 years, yet coal also prevents an environmental challenge." —Washington, D.C., April 20, 2005

"We look forward to analyzing and working with legislation that will make—it would hope—put a free press's mind at ease that you're not being denied information you shouldn't see."
—Washington, D.C., April 14, 2005

"I understand there's a suspicion that we—we're too security-conscience."—Washington D.C., April 14, 2005

"I'm going to spend a lot of time on Social Security. I enjoy it. I enjoy taking on the issue. I guess, it's the Mother in me." —Washington D.C., April 14, 2005

"I want to thank you for the importance that you've shown for education and literacy."
—Washington, D.C., April 13, 2005

"If they pre-decease or die early, there's an asset base to be able to pass on to a loved one."—On Social Security money stored in private accounts, Cedar Rapids, Iowa, March 30, 2005

"I repeat, personal accounts do not permanently fix the solution."—Washington, D.C., March 16, 2005

"In terms of timetables, as quickly as possible—whatever that means."—On the president's time frame for shoring up Social Security, Washington D.C., March 16, 2005


"In this job you've got a lot on your plate on a regular basis; you don't have much time to sit around and wander, lonely, in the Oval Office, kind of asking different portraits, 'How do you think my standing will be?' "—Washington, D.C., March 16, 2005

"I believe we are called to do the hard work to make our communities and quality of life a better place."—Collinsville, Ill., Jan. 5, 2005


"After all, Europe is America's closest ally."—Mainz, Germany, Feb. 23, 2005

"This notion that the United States is getting ready to attack Iran is simply ridiculous. And having said that, all options are on the table."—Brussels, Belgium, Feb. 22, 2005 (Thanks to Fred Kaplan)

"If you're a younger person, you ought to be asking members of Congress and the United States Senate and the president what you intend to do about it. If you see a train wreck coming, you ought to be saying, what are you going to do about it, Mr. Congressman, or Madam Congressman?"—Detroit, Feb. 8, 2005

"Because the—all which is on the table begins to address the big cost drivers. For example, how benefits are calculate, for example, is on the table; whether or not benefits rise based upon wage increases or price increases. There's a series of parts of the formula that are being considered. And when you couple that, those different cost drivers, affecting those—changing those with personal accounts, the idea is to get what has been promised more likely to be—or closer delivered to what has been promised. Does that make any sense to you? It's kind of muddled. Look, there's a series of things that cause the—like, for example, benefits are calculated based upon the increase of wages, as opposed to the increase of prices. Some have suggested that we calculate—the benefits will rise based upon inflation, as opposed to wage increases. There is a reform that would help solve the red if that were put into effect. In other words, how fast benefits grow, how fast the promised benefits grow, if those—if that growth is affected, it will help on the red."—Explaining his plan to save Social Security, Tampa, Fla., Feb. 4, 2005

"I'm also mindful that man should never try to put words in God's mouth. I mean, we should never ascribe natural disasters or anything else, to God. We are in no way, shape, or form should a human being, play God."—Appearing on ABC's 20/20, Washington D.C., Jan. 14, 2005

"And that's why I'm here at the community college system today."—Jacksonville, Fla., Jan. 14, 2005

"I want to appreciate those of you who wear our nation's uniform for your sacrifice."—Jacksonville, Fla., Jan. 14, 2005

"We need to apply 21st-century information technology to the health care field. We need to have our medical records put on the I.T."—Collinsville, Ill., Jan. 5, 2005

"It's a time of sorrow and sadness when we lose a loss of life."—Washington, D.C., Dec. 21, 2004

"They can get in line like those who have been here legally and have been working to become a citizenship in a legal manner."—Referring to immigrant workers, Washington, D.C., Dec. 20, 2004

"And so during these holiday seasons, we thank our blessings. ... "—Fort Belvoir, Va., Dec. 10, 2004

"I always jest to people, the Oval Office is the kind of place where people stand outside, they're getting ready to come in and tell me what for, and they walk in and get overwhelmed by the atmosphere. And they say 'man, you're looking pretty.' "—Washington, D.C., Nov. 4, 2004

"I believe that, as quickly as possible, young cows ought to be allowed to go across our border."—Ottawa, Nov. 30, 2004

"The president and I also reaffirmed our determination to fight terror, to bring drug trafficking to bear, to bring justice to those who pollute our youth"—Speaking with Chilean President Ricardo Lagos, Santiago, Chile, Nov. 21, 2004

"We thought we were protected forever from trade policy or terrorist attacks because oceans protected us."—Speech to business leaders at APEC Summit, Santiago, Chile, Nov. 20, 2004

"After standing on the stage, after the debates, I made it very plain, we will not have an all-volunteer army. And yet, this week—we will have an all-volunteer army. Let me restate that."—Daytona Beach, Fla., Oct. 16, 2004

"The CIA laid out several scenarios and said life could be lousy, life could be OK, life could be better, and they were just guessing as to what the conditions might be like."—New York, Sept. 21, 2004

"Free societies are hopeful societies. And free societies will be allies against these hateful few who have no conscience, who kill at the whim of a hat."—Washington, D.C., Sept. 17, 2004 (Thanks to David Stanford.)

"That's why I went to the Congress last September and proposed fundamental—supplemental funding, which is money for armor and body parts and ammunition and fuel."—Erie, Pa., Sept. 4, 2004

"Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB/GYN's aren't able to practice their love with women all across the country."—Sept. 6, 2004, Poplar Bluff, Mo.

"They've seen me make decisions, they've seen me under trying times, they've seen me weep, they've seen me laugh, they've seen me hug. And they know who I am, and I believe they're comfortable with the fact that they know I'm not going to shift principles or shift positions based upon polls and focus groups." —Interview with USA Today, Aug. 27, 2004

"I didn't join the International Criminal Court because I don't want to put our troops in the hands of prosecutors from other nations. Look, if somebody has done some wrong in our military, we'll take care of it. We got plenty of capability of dealing with justice."—Niceville, Fla., Aug. 10, 2004

"So community colleges are accessible, they're available, they're affordable, and their curriculums don't get stuck. In other words, if there's a need for a certain kind of worker, I presume your curriculums evolved over time."—Niceville, Fla., Aug. 10, 2004

"Tribal sovereignty means that, it's sovereign. You're a—you've been given sovereignty, and you're viewed as a sovereign entity. And, therefore, the relationship between the federal government and tribes is one between sovereign entities."—Washington, D.C., Aug. 6, 2004

"Secondly, the tactics of our—as you know, we don't have relationships with Iran. I mean, that's—ever since the late '70s, we have no contacts with them, and we've totally sanctioned them. In other words, there's no sanctions—you can't—we're out of sanctions."—Annandale, Va., Aug. 9, 2004

"I mean, if you've ever been a governor of a state, you understand the vast potential of broadband technology, you understand how hard it is to make sure that physics, for example, is taught in every classroom in the state. It's difficult to do. It's, like, cost-prohibitive."—Washington, D.C., June 24, 2004 (Thanks to Michael Shively.)

"Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we."—Washington, D.C., Aug. 5, 2004 (Thanks to Alicia Butler.)

"And I am an optimistic person. I guess if you want to try to find something to be pessimistic about, you can find it, no matter how hard you look, you know?"—Washington, D.C., June 15, 2004 (Thanks to Robert Irwin.)

"[A] free Iraq is essential to our respective securities."—Washington, D.C., June 1, 2004

"I want to thank my friend, Sen. Bill Frist, for joining us today. … He married a Texas girl, I want you to know. (Laughter.) Karyn is with us. A West Texas girl, just like me."—Nashville, Tenn., May 27, 2004

"I'm honored to shake the hand of a brave Iraqi citizen who had his hand cut off by Saddam Hussein."—Washington, D.C., May 25, 2004

"This has been tough weeks in that country."—Washington, D.C., April 13, 2004 (Thanks to David Huddleston.)

"[B]y the way, we rank 10th amongst the industrialized world in broadband technology and its availability. That's not good enough for America. Tenth is 10 spots too low as far as I'm concerned."—Minneapolis, Minn., April 26, 2004

"My job is to, like, think beyond the immediate."—Washington, D.C., April 21, 2004

"This is historic times."—New York, N.Y., April 20, 2004

"Obviously, I pray every day there's less casualty."—Fort Hood, Texas, April 11, 2004 (Thanks to Pat Gallagher.)

"Recession means that people's incomes, at the employer level, are going down, basically, relative to costs, people are getting laid off."—Washington, D.C., Feb. 19, 2004 (Thanks to Garry Trudeau.)

"God loves you, and I love you. And you can count on both of us as a powerful message that people who wonder about their future can hear."—Los Angeles, Calif., March 3, 2004 (Thanks to Tanny Bear.)

"The march to war affected the people's confidence. It's hard to make investment. See, if you're a small business owner or a large business owner and you're thinking about investing, you've got to be optimistic when you invest. Except when you're marching to war, it's not a very optimistic thought, is it? In other words, it's the opposite of optimistic when you're thinking you're going to war." —Springfield, Mo., Feb. 9, 2004 (Thanks to Garry Trudeau.)

"See, one of the interesting things in the Oval Office—I love to bring people into the Oval Office—right around the corner from here—and say, this is where I office, but I want you to know the office is always bigger than the person."—Washington, D.C., Jan. 29, 2004 (Thanks to Michael Shively.)

"More Muslims have died at the hands of killers than—I say more Muslims—a lot of Muslims have died—I don't know the exact count—at Istanbul. Look at these different places around the world where there's been tremendous death and destruction because killers kill."—Washington, D.C., Jan. 29, 2004 (Thanks to Michael Shively.)

"In an economic recession, I'd rather that in order to get out of this recession, that the people be spending their money, not the government trying to figure out how to spend the people's money."—Tampa, Fla., Feb. 16, 2004

"King Abdullah of Jordan, the King of Morocco, I mean, there's a series of places—Qatar, Oman—I mean, places that are developing—Bahrain—they're all developing the habits of free societies."—Washington, D.C., Jan. 29, 2004

"But the true strength of America is found in the hearts and souls of people like Travis, people who are willing to love their neighbor, just like they would like to love themselves."—Springfield, Mo., Feb. 9, 2004 (Thanks to George Dupper.)

"My views are one that speaks to freedom."—Washington, D.C., Jan. 29, 2004

"In my judgment, when the United States says there will be serious consequences, and if there isn't serious consequences, it creates adverse consequences."

"There is no such thing necessarily in a dictatorial regime of iron-clad absolutely solid evidence. The evidence I had was the best possible evidence that he had a weapon."

"The recession started upon my arrival. t could have been—some say February, some say March, some speculate maybe earlier it started—but nevertheless, it happened as we showed up here. The attacks on our country affected our economy. Corporate scandals affected the confidence of people and therefore affected the economy. My decision on Iraq, this kind of march to war, affected the economy."—Meet the Press, Feb. 8, 2004

"I was a prisoner too, but for bad reasons."—To Argentine President Nestor Kirchner, on being told that all but one of the Argentine delegates to a summit meeting were imprisoned during the military dictatorship, Monterrey, Mexico, Jan. 13, 2004

"[T]he illiteracy level of our children are appalling."—Washington, D.C., Jan. 23, 2004 (Thanks to Lewell Gunter.)

"Just remember it's the birds that's supposed to suffer, not the hunter."—Advising quail hunter and New Mexico Sen. Pete Domenici, Roswell, N.M., Jan. 22, 2004

"One of the most meaningful things that's happened to me since I've been the governor—the president—governor—president. Oops. Ex-governor. I went to Bethesda Naval Hospital to give a fellow a Purple Heart, and at the same moment I watched him—get a Purple Heart for action in Iraq—and at that same—right after I gave him the Purple Heart, he was sworn in as a citizen of the United States—a Mexican citizen, now a United States citizen."—Washington, D.C., Jan. 9, 2004

"I want to thank the astronauts who are with us, the courageous spacial entrepreneurs who set such a wonderful example for the young of our country."—Washington, D.C., Jan. 14, 2004

"And if you're interested in the quality of education and you're paying attention to what you hear at Laclede, why don't you volunteer? Why don't you mentor a child how to read?"—St. Louis, Mo., Jan. 5, 2004

"So thank you for reminding me about the importance of being a good mom and a great volunteer as well."—St. Louis, Jan. 5, 2004

"I want to remind you all that in order to fight and win the war, it requires an expenditure of money that is commiserate with keeping a promise to our troops to make sure that they're well-paid, well-trained, well-equipped."

"See, without the tax relief package, there would have been a deficit, but there wouldn't have been the commiserate—not 'commiserate'—the kick to our economy that occurred as a result of the tax relief."

"[T]he best way to find these terrorists who hide in holes is to get people coming forth to describe the location of the hole, is to give clues and data."

"Justice was being delivered to a man who defied that gift from the Almighty to the people of Iraq."—Washington, D.C., Dec. 15, 2003

"[A]s you know, these are open forums, you're able to come and listen to what I have to say."—Washington, D.C., Oct. 28, 2003

"The ambassador and the general were briefing me on the—the vast majority of Iraqis want to live in a peaceful, free world. And we will find these people and we will bring them to justice."—Washington, D.C., Oct. 27, 2003 (Thanks to Robert Hack.)

"[W]hether they be Christian, Jew, or Muslim, or Hindu, people have heard the universal call to love a neighbor just like they'd like to be called themselves."—Washington, Oct. 8, 2003 (Thanks to George Dupper.)

"See, free nations are peaceful nations. Free nations don't attack each other. Free nations don't develop weapons of mass destruction."—Milwaukee, Wis., Oct. 3, 2003

"[W]e've had leaks out of the administrative branch, had leaks out of the legislative branch, and out of the executive branch and the legislative branch, and I've spoken out consistently against them, and I want to know who the leakers are."—Chicago, Sept. 30, 2003

"Washington is a town where there's all kinds of allegations. You've heard much of the allegations. And if people have got solid information, please come forward with it. And that would be people inside the information who are the so-called anonymous sources, or people outside the information—outside the administration."—Chicago, Sept. 30, 2003 (Thanks to Andy Bowers.)

"[T]hat's just the nature of democracy. Sometimes pure politics enters into the rhetoric."—Crawford, Texas, Aug. 8, 2003 (Thanks to Inigo Thomas.)

"I glance at the headlines just to kind of get a flavor for what's moving. I rarely read the stories, and get briefed by people who are probably read the news themselves."—Washington, D.C., Sept. 21, 2003

"I'm so pleased to be able to say hello to Bill Scranton. He's one of the great Pennsylvania political families."—Drexel Hill, Penn., Sept. 15, 2003 (Thanks to Michael Shively.)

"We had a good Cabinet meeting, talked about a lot of issues. Secretary of State and Defense brought us up to date about our desires to spread freedom and peace around the world."—Washington, D.C., Aug. 1, 2003 (Thanks to Tanny Bear.)

"Security is the essential roadblock to achieving the road map to peace."—Washington, D.C., July 25, 2003

"Our country puts $1 billion a year up to help feed the hungry. And we're by far the most generous nation in the world when it comes to that, and I'm proud to report that. This isn't a contest of who's the most generous. I'm just telling you as an aside. We're generous. We shouldn't be bragging about it. But we are. We're very generous."—Washington, D.C., July 16, 2003

"It's very interesting when you think about it, the slaves who left here to go to America, because of their steadfast and their religion and their belief in freedom, helped change America."—Dakar, Senegal, July 8, 2003 (Thanks to Michael Shively.)

"My answer is bring them on."—On Iraqi militants attacking U.S. forces, Washington, D.C., July 3, 2003

"You've also got to measure in order to begin to effect change that's just more—when there's more than talk, there's just actual—a paradigm shift."—Washington, D.C., July 1, 2003 (Thanks to Michael Shively.)

"I urge the leaders in Europe and around the world to take swift, decisive action against terror groups such as Hamas, to cut off their funding, and to support—cut funding and support, as the United States has done."—Washington, D.C., June 25, 2003

"Iran would be dangerous if they have a nuclear weapon."—Washington, D.C., June 18, 2003

"Now, there are some who would like to rewrite history—revisionist historians is what I like to call them."—Elizabeth, N.J., June 16, 2003

"I am determined to keep the process on the road to peace."—Washington, D.C., June 10, 2003 (Thanks to Tanny Bear.)

"The true strength of America happens when a neighbor loves a neighbor just like they'd like to be loved themselves."—Elizabeth, N.J., June 16, 2003

"We are making steadfast progress."—Washington, D.C., June 9, 2003 (Thanks to Michael Shively.)

"I'm the master of low expectations."—Aboard Air Force One, June 4, 2003

"I'm also not very analytical. You know I don't spend a lot of time thinking about myself, about why I do things."—Aboard Air Force One, June 4, 2003

"I recently met with the finance minister of the Palestinian Authority, was very impressed by his grasp of finances."—Washington, D.C., May 29, 2003

"Oftentimes, we live in a processed world—you know, people focus on the process and not results."—Washington, D.C., May 29, 2003

"I've got very good relations with President Mubarak and Crown Prince Abdallah and the King of Jordan, Gulf Coast countries."—Washington, D.C., May 29, 2003

"All up and down the different aspects of our society, we had meaningful discussions. Not only in the Cabinet Room, but prior to this and after this day, our secretaries, respective secretaries, will continue to interact to create the conditions necessary for prosperity to reign."—Washington, D.C., May 19, 2003

"First, let me make it very clear, poor people aren't necessarily killers. Just because you happen to be not rich doesn't mean you're willing to kill."—Washington, D.C., May 19, 2003

"We ended the rule of one of history's worst tyrants, and in so doing, we not only freed the American people, we made our own people more secure."—Crawford, Texas, May 3, 2003 (Thanks to Tony Marciniec.)

"We've had a great weekend here in the Land of the Enchanted."—Albuquerque, N.M., May 12, 2003 (New Mexico's state nickname is "Land of Enchantment.")

"We've got hundreds of sites to exploit, looking for the chemical and biological weapons that we know Saddam Hussein had prior to our entrance into Iraq."—Santa Clara, Calif., May 2, 2003 (Thanks to Michael Shively.)

"I think war is a dangerous place."—Washington, D.C., May 7, 2003

"I don't bring God into my life to—to, you know, kind of be a political person."—Interview with Tom Brokaw aboard Air Force One, April 24, 2003

"You're free. And freedom is beautiful. And, you know, it'll take time to restore chaos and order—order out of chaos. But we will."—Washington, D.C., April 13, 2003

"Perhaps one way will be, if we use military force, in the post-Saddam Iraq the U.N. will definitely need to have a role. And that way it can begin to get its legs, legs of responsibility back."—the Azores, Portugal, March 16, 2003

"I know there's a lot of young ladies who are growing up wondering whether or not they can be champs. And they see the championship teams from USC and University of Portland here, girls who worked hard to get to where they are, and they're wondering about the example they're setting. What is life choices about?"—Washington, D.C., Feb. 24, 2003

"Now, we talked to Joan Hanover. She and her husband, George, were visiting with us. They are near retirement—retiring—in the process of retiring, meaning they're very smart, active, capable people who are retirement age and are retiring."—Alexandria, Va., Feb. 12, 2003 (Thanks to Dennis Doubleday.)

"Columbia carried in its payroll classroom experiments from some of our students in America."—Bethesda, Md., Feb. 3, 2003

"And, most importantly, Alma Powell, secretary of Colin Powell, is with us."—Washington, D.C., Jan. 30, 2003

"The war on terror involves Saddam Hussein because of the nature of Saddam Hussein, the history of Saddam Hussein, and his willingness to terrorize himself."—Grand Rapids, Mich., Jan. 29, 2003

"When Iraq is liberated, you will be treated, tried, and persecuted as a war criminal."—Washington, D.C., Jan. 22, 2003 (Thanks to Chad Conwell.)

"Many of the punditry—of course, not you (laughter)—but other punditry were quick to say, no one is going to follow the United States of America."—Washington, D.C., Jan. 21, 2003

"One year ago today, the time for excuse-making has come to an end."—Washington, D.C., Jan. 8, 2003

"I think the American people—I hope the American–I don't think, let me—I hope the American people trust me."—Washington, D.C., Dec. 18, 2002

"The goals for this country are peace in the world. And the goals for this country are a compassionate American for every single citizen. That compassion is found in the hearts and souls of the American citizens."—Washington, D.C., Dec. 19, 2002 (Thanks to Michael Shively.)

"There's only one person who hugs the mothers and the widows, the wives and the kids upon the death of their loved one. Others hug but having committed the troops, I've got an additional responsibility to hug and that's me and I know what it's like."—Washington, D.C., Dec. 11, 2002

"In other words, I don't think people ought to be compelled to make the decision which they think is best for their family."—Washington, D.C., Dec. 11, 2002 (Thanks to Stephanie Nichols.)

"Sometimes, Washington is one of these towns where the person—people who think they've got the sharp elbow is the most effective person." —New Orleans, Dec. 3, 2002 (Thanks to Michael Shively.)

"The law I sign today directs new funds and new focus to the task of collecting vital intelligence on terrorist threats and on weapons of mass production."—Washington, D.C., Nov. 27, 2002

"These people don't have tanks. They don't have ships. They hide in caves. They send suiciders out."—Speaking about terrorists, Portsmouth, N.H., Nov. 1, 2002

"I know something about being a government. And you've got a good one."—Stumping for Gov. Mike Huckabee, Bentonville, Ark., Nov. 4, 2002

"I need to be able to move the right people to the right place at the right time to protect you, and I'm not going to accept a lousy bill out of the United Nations Senate."—South Bend, Ind., Oct. 31, 2002

"John Thune has got a common-sense vision for good forest policy. I look forward to working with him in the United Nations Senate to preserve these national heritages."

"Any time we've got any kind of inkling that somebody is thinking about doing something to an American and something to our homeland, you've just got to know we're moving on it, to protect the United Nations Constitution, and at the same time, we're protecting you."—Aberdeen, S.D., same day (Thanks to George Dupper.)

"Let me tell you my thoughts about tax relief. When your economy is kind of ooching along, it's important to let people have more of their own money."—Boston, Oct. 4, 2002

"I was proud the other day when both Republicans and Democrats stood with me in the Rose Garden to announce their support for a clear statement of purpose: you disarm, or we will."—Speaking about Saddam Hussein, Manchester, N.H., Oct. 5, 2002 (Thanks to George Dupper.)

"You see, the Senate wants to take away some of the powers of the administrative branch."—Washington, D.C., Sept. 19, 2002

"We need an energy bill that encourages consumption."—Trenton, N.J., Sept. 23, 2002

"People say, how can I help on this war against terror? How can I fight evil? You can do so by mentoring a child; by going into a shut-in's house and say I love you."—Washington, D.C., Sept. 19, 2002

"I'm plowed of the leadership of Chuck Grassley and Greg Ganske and Jim Leach."—Davenport, Iowa, Sept. 16, 2002

"There's an old saying in Tennessee—I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee—that says, fool me once, shame on—shame on you. Fool me—you can't get fooled again."—Nashville, Tenn., Sept. 17, 2002

"There's no doubt in my mind that we should allow the world worst leaders to hold America hostage, to threaten our peace, to threaten our friends and allies with the world's worst weapons."—South Bend, Ind., Sept. 5, 2002

"If you don't have any ambitions, the minimum-wage job isn't going to get you to where you want to get, for example. In other words, what is your ambitions? And oh, by the way, if that is your ambition, here's what it's going to take to achieve it."—Speech to students in Little Rock, Ark., Aug. 29, 2002 (Thanks to George Dupper.)

"See, we love—we love freedom. That's what they didn't understand. They hate things; we love things. They act out of hatred; we don't seek revenge, we seek justice out of love."—Oklahoma City, Aug. 29, 2002

"There's no cave deep enough for America, or dark enough to hide."—Oklahoma City, Aug. 29, 2002 (Thanks to Michael Shively.)

"President Musharraf, he's still tight with us on the war against terror, and that's what I appreciate. He's a—he understands that we've got to keep al-Qaida on the run, and that by keeping him on the run, it's more likely we will bring him to justice."—Ruch, Ore., Aug. 22, 2002 (Thanks to Scott Miller.)

"I'm a patient man. And when I say I'm a patient man, I mean I'm a patient man."

"Nothing he [Saddam Hussein] has done has convinced me—I'm confident the Secretary of Defense—that he is the kind of fellow that is willing to forgo weapons of mass destruction, is willing to be a peaceful neighbor, that is—will honor the people—the Iraqi people of all stripes, will—values human life. He hasn't convinced me, nor has he convinced my administration."—Crawford, Texas, Aug. 21, 2002

"I'm thrilled to be here in the bread basket of America because it gives me a chance to remind our fellow citizens that we have an advantage here in America—we can feed ourselves."—Stockton, Calif., Aug. 23, 2002 (Thanks to Christopher Baird.)

"There's no bigger task than protecting the homeland of our country."

"The federal government and the state government must not fear programs who change lives, but must welcome those faith-based programs for the embetterment of mankind."—Stockton, Calif., Aug. 23, 2002 (Thanks to George Dupper.)

"I love the idea of a school in which people come to get educated and stay in the state in which they're educated."

"There may be some tough times here in America. But this country has gone through tough times before, and we're going to do it again."

"I promise you I will listen to what has been said here, even though I wasn't here."

"I can assure you that, even though I won't be sitting through every single moment of the seminars, nor will the vice president, we will look at the summaries."

"Tommy [Thompson, Health and Human Services secretary,] is a good listener, and he's a pretty good actor, too."

"The trial lawyers are very politically powerful. … But here in Texas we took them on and got some good medical—medical malpractice.""I firmly believe the death tax is good for people from all walks of life all throughout our society."

—Waco, Texas, Aug. 13, 2002

"There was no malfeance involved. This was an honest disagreement about accounting procedures. ... There was no malfeance, no attempt to hide anything."—White House press conference, Washington, D.C., July 8, 2002

"I also understand how tender the free enterprise system can be."—White House press conference, Washington, D.C., July 9, 2002

"Over 75 percent of white Americans own their home, and less than 50 percent of Hispanos and African Americans don't own their home. And that's a gap, that's a homeownership gap. And we've got to do something about it."—Cleveland, Ohio, July 1, 2002

"Whether you're here by birth, or whether you're in America by choice, you contribute to the vitality of our life. And for that, we are grateful."—Washington, D.C., May 17, 2002

"I'd rather have them sacrificing on behalf of our nation than, you know, endless hours of testimony on congressional hill."—National Security Agency, Fort Meade, Maryland, June 4, 2002

"We're working with Chancellor Schröder on what's called 10-plus-10-over-10: $10 billion from the U.S.,$10 billion from other members of the G7 over a 10-year period, to help Russia securitize the dismantling—the dismantled nuclear warheads."—Berlin, Germany, May 23, 2002

"Do you have blacks, too?"—To Brazilian President Fernando Cardoso, Washington, D.C., Nov. 8, 2001

"This is a nation that loves our freedom, loves our country."—Washington, D.C, May 17, 2002

"The public education system in America is one of the most important foundations of our democracy. After all, it is where children from all over America learn to be responsible citizens, and learn to have the skills necessary to take advantage of our fantastic opportunistic society."—Santa Clara, Calif., May 1, 2002

"After all, a week ago, there were—Yasser Arafat was boarded up in his building in Ramallah, a building full of, evidently, German peace protestors and all kinds of people. They're now out. He's now free to show leadership, to lead the world."—Washington, D.C., May 2, 2002 (Thanks to M. Bateman.)

"This foreign policy stuff is a little frustrating."—as quoted by the New York Daily News, April 23, 2002

"I want to thank the dozens of welfare to work stories, the actual examples of people who made the firm and solemn commitment to work hard to embetter themselves."—Washington, D.C., April 18, 2002 (Thanks to George Dupper.)

"And so, in my State of the—my State of the Union—or state—my speech to the nation, whatever you want to call it, speech to the nation—I asked Americans to give 4,000 years—4,000 hours over the next—the rest of your life—of service to America. That's what I asked—4,000 hours." —Bridgeport, Conn., April 9, 2002

"It would be a mistake for the United States Senate to allow any kind of human cloning to come out of that chamber."—Washington, D.C., April 10, 2002

"For a century and a half now, America and Japan have formed one of the great and enduring alliances of modern times."—Tokyo, Japan, Feb. 18, 2002

"We've tripled the amount of money—I believe it's from $50 million up to $195 million available."—Lima, Peru, March 23, 2002

"We've got pockets of persistent poverty in our society, which I refuse to declare defeat—I mean, I refuse to allow them to continue on. And so one of the things that we're trying to do is to encourage a faith-based initiative to spread its wings all across America, to be able to capture this great compassionate spirit."—O'Fallon, Mo., Mar. 18, 2002

"There's nothing more deep than recognizing Israel's right to exist. That's the most deep thought of all. ... I can't think of anything more deep than that right."—Washington, D.C., March 13, 2002

"I understand that the unrest in the Middle East creates unrest throughout the region."—Washington, D.C., March 13, 2002

"The suicide bombings have increased. There's too many of them."—Albuquerque, N.M., Aug. 15, 2001

"Brie and cheese."—Taunting a reporter who recently spent time on the West Coast, Crawford, Texas, Aug. 23, 2001

"You'll hear people say it's racist to test. Folks, it's racist not to test. Because guess who gets shuffled through the system oftentimes? Children whose parents don't speak English as a first language, inner-city kids. It's so much easier to quit on somebody than to remediate."—Referring to his education bill, Independence, Mo., Aug. 21, 2001 (Thanks to Julie Reagan.)

"One of the interesting initiatives we've taken in Washington, D.C., is we've got these vampire-busting devices. A vampire is a—a cell deal you can plug in the wall to charge your cell phone."—Denver, Aug. 14, 2001

"There's a lot of people in the Middle East who are desirous to get into the Mitchell process. And—but first things first. The—these terrorist acts and, you know, the responses have got to end in order for us to get the framework—the groundwork—not framework, the groundwork to discuss a framework for peace, to lay the—all right."—Referring to former Sen. George Mitchell's report on Middle East peace, Crawford, Texas, Aug. 13, 2001 (Thanks to Michael Shively.)

"My administration has been calling upon all the leaders in the—in the Middle East to do everything they can to stop the violence, to tell the different parties involved that peace will never happen."—Crawford, Texas, Aug, 13, 2001 (Thanks to Michael Shively.)

"You saw the president yesterday. I thought he was very forward-leaning, as they say in diplomatic nuanced circles."—Referring to his meeting with Russian President Vladimir Putin, Rome, July 23, 2001 (Thanks to Alex Hernandez.)

''I know what I believe. I will continue to articulate what I believe and what I believe—I believe what I believe is right."—Rome, July 22, 2001

"I can't tell you what it's like to be in Europe, for example, to be talking about the greatness of America. But the true greatness of America are the people."—Visiting the Jefferson Memorial, Washington, D.C., July 2, 2001

"Well, it's an unimaginable honor to be the president during the Fourth of July of this country. It means what these words say, for starters. The great inalienable rights of our country. We're blessed with such values in America. And I—it's—I'm a proud man to be the nation based upon such wonderful values."—Visiting the Jefferson Memorial, Washington, D.C., July 2, 2001

"I want to thank you for coming to the White House to give me an opportunity to urge you to work with these five senators and three congressmen, to work hard to get this trade promotion authority moving. The power that be, well most of the power that be, sits right here."—Washington, D.C., June 18, 2001

"We spent a lot of time talking about Africa, as we should. Africa is a nation that suffers from incredible disease."—Gothenburg, Sweden, June 14, 2001

"I haven't had a chance to talk, but I'm confident we'll get a bill that I can live with if we don't."—Referring to the McCain-Kennedy patients' bill of rights, Brussels, Belgium, June 13, 2001

"Can't living with the bill means it won't become law."—Referring to the McCain-Kennedy patients' bill of rights, Brussels, Belgium, June 13, 2001

"Russia is no longer our enemy and therefore we shouldn't be locked into a Cold War mentality that says we keep the peace by blowing each other up. In my attitude, that's old, that's tired, that's stale."—Des Moines, Iowa, June 8, 2001

"Anyway, I'm so thankful, and so gracious—I'm gracious that my brother Jeb is concerned about the hemisphere as well."—Miami, Fla., June 4, 2001

"It's important for young men and women who look at the Nebraska champs to understand that quality of life is more than just blocking shots."—Remarks to the University of Nebraska women's volleyball team, the 2001 national champions, Washington, D.C., May 31, 2001

"Our nation must come together to unite."—Tampa, Fla., June 4, 2001

"So on behalf of a well-oiled unit of people who came together to serve something greater than themselves, congratulations."—Remarks to the University of Nebraska women's volleyball team, the 2001 national champions, Washington, D.C., May 31, 2001

"If a person doesn't have the capacity that we all want that person to have, I suspect hope is in the far distant future, if at all."—Remarks to the Hispanic Scholarship Fund Institute, Washington, D.C., May 22, 2001

"Thirdly, the explorationists are willing to only move equipment during the winter, which means they'll be on ice roads, and remove the equipment as the ice begins to melt, so that the fragile tundra is protected."—Conestoga, Pa., May 18, 2001

"Presidents, whether things are good or bad, get the blame. I understand that."—Washington, D.C., May 11, 2001 (Thanks to Jay Schlossberg.)

"For every fatal shooting, there were roughly three non-fatal shootings. And, folks, this is unacceptable in America. It's just unacceptable. And we're going to do something about it."—Philadelphia, May 14, 2001 (Thanks to John Brooks.)

"There's no question that the minute I got elected, the storm clouds on the horizon were getting nearly directly overhead."—Washington, D.C., May 11, 2001

"But I also made it clear to [Vladimir Putin] that it's important to think beyond the old days of when we had the concept that if we blew each other up, the world would be safe."—Washington, D.C., May 1, 2001 (Thanks to Gene Mosher.)

"Whatever it took to help Taiwan defend theirself."—On how far we'd be willing to go to defend Taiwan, Good Morning America, April 25, 2001

"First, we would not accept a treaty that would not have been ratified, nor a treaty that I thought made sense for the country."—On the Kyoto accord in an interview with the Washington Post, April 24, 2001

"It's very important for folks to understand that when there's more trade, there's more commerce."—Quebec City, Canada, April 21, 2001

"Neither in French nor in English nor in Mexican."—Declining to answer reporters' questions at the Summit of the Americas, Quebec City, Canada, April 21, 2001

"We must have the attitude that every child in America—regardless of where they're raised or how they're born—can learn."—New Britain, Conn., April 18, 2001 (Thanks to Eric Beerbohm.)

"It is time to set aside the old partisan bickering and finger-pointing and name-calling that comes from freeing parents to make different choices for their children."—Remarks on "parental empowerment in education," Washington, D.C., April 12, 2001 (Thanks to J.R. Taylor.)

I think we're making progress. We understand where the power of this country lay. It lays in the hearts and souls of Americans. It must lay in our pocketbooks. It lays in the willingness for people to work hard. But as importantly, it lays in the fact that we've got citizens from all walks of life, all political parties, that are willing to say, I want to love my neighbor. I want to make somebody's life just a little bit better."—Concord Middle School, Concord, N.C., April 11, 2001

"This administration is doing everything we can to end the stalemate in an efficient way. We're making the right decisions to bring the solution to an end."—Washington, D.C., April 10, 2001

"The Senate needs to leave enough money in the proposed budget to not only reduce all marginal rates, but to eliminate the death tax, so that people who build up assets are able to transfer them from one generation to the next, regardless of a person's race."—Washington, D.C., April 5, 2001

"It would be helpful if we opened up ANWR (Arctic National Wildlife Refuge). I think it's a mistake not to. And I would urge you all to travel up there and take a look at it, and you can make the determination as to how beautiful that country is."—Press conference, Washington, D.C., March 29, 2001

"I've coined new words, like, misunderstanding and Hispanically."—Radio-Television Correspondents Association dinner, Washington, D.C., March 29, 2001

"And we need a full affront on an energy crisis that is real in California and looms for other parts of our country if we don't move quickly."—Press conference, Washington, D.C., March 29, 2001


"I assured the prime minister, my administration will work hard to lay the foundation of peace in the Middle—to work with our nations in the Middle East, give peace a chance. Secondly, I told him that our nation will not try to force peace, that we'll facilitate peace and that we will work with those responsible for a peace."—Photo opportunity with Ariel Sharon, Washington, D.C., March 20, 2001 (Thanks to Scott Beber.)

"There are some monuments where the land is so widespread, they just encompass as much as possible. And the integral part of the—the precious part, so to speak—I guess all land is precious, but the part that the people uniformly would not want to spoil, will not be despoiled. But there are parts of the monument lands where we can explore without affecting the overall environment."—Media round table, Washington, D.C. March 13, 2001

"A lot of times in the rhetoric, people forget the facts. And the facts are that thousands of small businesses—Hispanically owned or otherwise—pay taxes at the highest marginal rate."—to the Hispanic Chamber of Commerce; Washington, D.C., March 19, 2001

"But the true threats to stability and peace are these nations that are not very transparent, that hide behind the—that don't let people in to take a look and see what they're up to. They're very kind of authoritarian regimes. The true threat is whether or not one of these people decide, peak of anger, try to hold us hostage, ourselves; the Israelis, for example, to whom we'll defend, offer our defenses; the South Koreans."—Media roundtable, Washington, D.C., March 13, 2001 (Thanks to Peter Sagal)

"I do think we need for a troop to be able to house his family. That's an important part of building morale in the military."—Tyndall Air Force Base, Florida, March 12, 2001

"I suspect that had my dad not been president, he'd be asking the same questions: How'd your meeting go with so-and-so? … How did you feel when you stood up in front of the people for the State of the Union Address—state of the budget address, whatever you call it."—Interview with the Washington Post, March 9, 2001

"I think there is some methodology in my travels." —Washington, D.C., March 5, 2001

"I'm also honored to be here with the speaker of the House—just happens to be from the state of Illinois. I'd like to describe the speaker as a trustworthy man. He's the kind of fellow who says when he gives you his word he means it. Sometimes that doesn't happen all the time in the political process."—Chicago, March 6, 2001 (Thanks to Gary Belkin.)

"Ann and I will carry out this equivocal message to the world: Markets must be open."—Swearing-in ceremony for Secretary of Agriculture Ann Veneman, Washington, D.C., March 2, 2001

"Of all states that understands local control of schools, Iowa is such a state."—Council Bluffs, Iowa, Feb. 28, 2001 (Thanks to Peter Sagal)

"Those of us who spent time in the agricultural sector and in the heartland, we understand how unfair the death penalty is."—Omaha, Neb., Feb. 28, 2001

"My pan plays down an unprecedented amount of our national debt."—Budget address to Congress, Feb. 27, 2001

"The budget caps were busted, mightily so. And we are reviewing with people like Judd Gregg from New Hampshire and others some budgetary reform measures that will reinstate—you know, possibly reinstate budgetary discipline. But the caps no longer—the caps, I guess they're there. But they didn't mean much."—Washington, D.C., Feb. 5, 2001 (Thanks to Ehren Meditz)

"I have said that the sanction regime is like Swiss cheese—that meant that they weren't very effective."—White House press conference, Washington, D.C., Feb. 22, 2001

"You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test.''—Townsend, Tenn., Feb. 21, 2001

"Home is important. It's important to have a home."—Crawford, Texas, Feb. 18, 2001

"One reason I like to highlight reading is, reading is the beginnings of the ability to be a good student. And if you can't read, it's going to be hard to realize dreams; it's going to be hard to go to college. So when your teachers say, read—you ought to listen to her."—Nalle Elementary School, Washington, D.C., Feb 9, 2001

"It's good to see so many friends here in the Rose Garden. This is our first event in this beautiful spot, and it's appropriate we talk about policy that will affect people's lives in a positive way in such a beautiful, beautiful part of our national—really, our national park system, my guess is you would want to call it."—Washington, D.C., Feb. 8, 2001

"We're concerned about AIDS inside our White House—make no mistake about it."—Washington, D.C., Feb. 7, 2001

"I appreciate that question because I, in the state of Texas, had heard a lot of discussion about a faith-based initiative eroding the important bridge between church and state."—Question and answer session with the press, Jan. 29, 2001 (Thanks to Tim Santry.)

"I confirmed to the prime minister that we appreciate our friendship."—After meeting with Prime Minister Jean Chrétien of Canada, Feb. 5, 2001

"There's no such thing as legacies. At least, there is a legacy, but I'll never see it."—To Catholic leaders at the White House, Jan. 31, 2001

"I am mindful not only of preserving executive powers for myself, but for predecessors as well."—Washington, D.C., Jan. 29, 2001

"My pro-life position is I believe there's life. It's not necessarily based in religion. I think there's a life there, therefore the notion of life, liberty and pursuit of happiness."—Quoted in the San Francisco Chronicle, Jan. 23, 2001

"Then I went for a run with the other dog and just walked. And I started thinking about a lot of things. I was able to—I can't remember what it was. Oh, the inaugural speech, started thinking through that."—Pre-inaugural interview with U.S. News & World Report, Jan. 22, 2001 issue

"Redefining the role of the United States from enablers to keep the peace to enablers to keep the peace from peacekeepers is going to be an assignment."—Interview with the New York Times, Jan. 14, 2001 (Thanks to Rachael Contorer.)

"The California crunch really is the result of not enough power-generating plants and then not enough power to power the power of generating plants."—Interview with the New York Times, Jan. 14, 2001

"I'm hopeful. I know there is a lot of ambition in Washington, obviously. But I hope the ambitious realize that they are more likely to succeed with success as opposed to failure."—Interview with the Associated Press, Jan. 18, 2001 (Thanks to M. Bateman.)

"If he's—the inference is that somehow he thinks slavery is a—is a noble institution I would—I would strongly reject that assumption—that John Ashcroft is a open-minded, inclusive person."—NBC Nightly News With Tom Brokaw, Jan. 14, 2001

"She's just trying to make sure Anthony gets a good meal—Antonio."—On Laura Bush inviting Justice Antonin Scalia to dinner at the White House. NBC Nightly News With Tom Brokaw, Jan. 14, 2001

"I want it to be said that the Bush administration was a results-oriented administration, because I believe the results of focusing our attention and energy on teaching children to read and having an education system that's responsive to the child and to the parents, as opposed to mired in a system that refuses to change, will make America what we want it to be—a literate country and a hopefuller country."—Washington, D.C., Jan. 11, 2001

"I would have to ask the questioner. I haven't had a chance to ask the questioners the question they've been questioning. On the other hand, I firmly believe she'll be a fine secretary of labor. And I've got confidence in Linda Chavez. She is a—she'll bring an interesting perspective to the Labor Department."—Austin, Texas, Jan. 8, 2001

"I do remain confident in Linda. She'll make a fine labor secretary. From what I've read in the press accounts, she's perfectly qualified."—Austin, Texas, Jan. 8, 2001

"I mean, these good folks are revolutionizing how businesses conduct their business. And, like them, I am very optimistic about our position in the world and about its influence on the United States. We're concerned about the short-term economic news, but long-term I'm optimistic. And so, I hope investors, you know—secondly, I hope investors hold investments for periods of time—that I've always found the best investments are those that you salt away based on economics."—Austin, Texas, Jan. 4, 2001

"The person who runs FEMA is someone who must have the trust of the president. Because the person who runs FEMA is the first voice, often times, of someone whose life has been turned upside down hears from."—Austin, Texas, Jan. 4, 2001

"She is a member of a labor union at one point."—Announcing his nomination of Linda Chavez as secretary of labor. Austin, Texas, Jan. 2, 2001

"Natural gas is hemispheric. I like to call it hemispheric in nature because it is a product that we can find in our neighborhoods."—Austin, Texas, Dec. 20, 2000

"I also have picked a secretary for Housing and Human Development. Mel Martinez from the state of Florida."—Austin, Texas, Dec. 20, 2000

"Let me put it to you this way, I am not a revengeful person."— Interview with Time magazine in the Dec. 25, 2000, issue.

"I am mindful of the difference between the executive branch and the legislative branch. I assured all four of these leaders that I know the difference, and that difference is they pass the laws and I execute them."—Washington, D.C., Dec. 18, 2000

"The great thing about America is everybody should vote."—Austin, Texas, Dec. 8, 2000

"Dick Cheney and I do not want this nation to be in a recession. We want anybody who can find work to be able to find work."—60 Minutes II, Dec. 5, 2000

"I knew it might put him in an awkward position that we had a discussion before finality has finally happened in this presidential race."

—Describing a phone call to Sen. John Breaux. Crawford, Texas, Dec. 2, 2000

"As far as the legal hassling and wrangling and posturing in Florida, I would suggest you talk to our team in Florida led by Jim Baker."—Crawford, Texas, Nov. 30, 2000

"The legislature's job is to write law. It's the executive branch's job to interpret law."—Austin, Texas, Nov. 22, 2000

"They misunderestimated me."—Bentonville, Ark., Nov. 6, 2000

"Think about that. Two hundred and eighty-five new or expanded programs, $2 trillion more in new spending, and not one new bureaucrat to file out the forms or answer the phones?"—Minneapolis, Nov. 1, 2000

"They want the federal government controlling Social Security like it's some kind of federal program."—St. Charles, Mo., Nov. 2, 2000

"They said, 'You know, this issue doesn't seem to resignate with the people.' And I said, you know something? Whether it resignates or not doesn't matter to me, because I stand for doing what's the right thing, and what the right thing is hearing the voices of people who work."—Portland, Ore., Oct. 31, 2000

"Anyway, after we go out and work our hearts out, after you go out and help us turn out the vote, after we've convinced the good Americans to vote, and while they're at it, pull that old George W. lever, if I'm the one, when I put my hand on the Bible, when I put my hand on the Bible, that day when they swear us in, when I put my hand on the Bible, I will swear to not—to uphold the laws of the land."—Toledo, Ohio, Oct. 27, 2000

"It's your money. You paid for it."—LaCrosse, Wis., Oct. 18, 2000

"That's a chapter, the last chapter of the 20th, 20th, the 21st century that most of us would rather forget. The last chapter of the 20th century. This is the first chapter of the 21st century. "—On the Lewinsky scandal, Arlington Heights, Ill., Oct. 24, 2000

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Renowned Blues Musician. Grammy award winning musician/composer. Former spouse of singer Tina Turner.



*Administrative Note: Any Virtual Flowers placed on memorial pages that contain anything other than respectful condolences and tributes will be deleted, as will inappropriate images an...
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Composer. Considered one of the most influential composers of the 20th century. Born in Mödrath, Germany, Stockhausen studied at the Cologne Musikhochschule and in 1950 was admitted to the class of Swiss composer Frank Martin. He then worked with composer Karel Goeyvaerts in Paris, where he lived fo...
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Professional Gambler. He was attending Stanford Business School, when he decided to play poker professionally after winning $100,000 at his first tournament in Las Vegas in 1974. He went on to become the card room manager at the Dunes Casino and one of the best poker players in the world. He won the...
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Musician. He was known as the "Conga King of Jazz" for his flamboyant performances. In 1954, he moved to New York and established himself as an indispensable percussionist with groups like Sonora Matancera and Conjunto Casino. Through the 1950s and '60s, he worked with Count Basie, Dizzy Gillespie, ...
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Artist. He was one of Canada's most celebrated painters and acknowledged as the founder of the pictographic style known as the Woodland or Anishnaabe School. Often called "the Picasso of the North", in the 1960s he was considered the first indigenous artist to achieve prominence in the mainstream ar...
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Advances in Phonauralalchemy

Advances in Phonauralalchemy

The effect of speech upon the condition of the soul is comparable to the power of drugs over the nature of bodies. -- Gorgias, Encomium of Helen

Right from the very beginning of Encomium, Gorgias promises to replace the falsehoods told about Helen with the truth. In saying so, is he being truthful with us about his true intention? In fact, he goes on to imply that the worth of all speech is best measured not by its truth value but its practical efficacy -- in particular its contribution to the flourishing of the soul. And his discourse on Helen exemplifies this implication. That speech can be good or bad as well as true or false is the main point of the simile Gorgias draws, likening the relationship between discourse and the soul to that between drugs and the body. Speeches, like drugs, possess the power to cause changes: whereas drugs affect the body, discourses act on the soul. Moreover, different kinds of speech produce different effects, and in this too it is like drugs, some of which "bring an end to disease and others to life ... some cause fear ... and some bewitch the soul with a kind of evil persuasion." Drugs are distinguished according to whether they are good or bad for the body, and the implication is that speeches ought to be evaluated according whether they are good or bad for the soul -- not whether they are true or false. As a further development of implications of this simile, Gorgias invites us to imagine a physician of the soul whose treatments consist of discourses that allow the soul to evaluate things differently. Both a medical and a soul doctor pursue a profession in which something of great value and that is irreplaceable is at stake. And the form taken by the knowledge of medicine and that of efficacious discourse is similar: both are practical not theoretical, concerned with useful knowledge rather than objective truth. That is, knowing which discourses are good for the soul and which are bad requires experience as well as study, skills as well as ideas, and innate talent as well as rigorous training.

But who is the physician of the soul? The answer seems to be: the rhetorician, the one who dispenses words in ways that make souls flourish. "I have by means of speech removed disgrace from a woman." Gorgias asserts that spoken words in a sentence, the act of speech, a speech act , can actually do things as well as assert truths, a performance that can change a state of affairs. The right words must be selected in the same manner that a doctor chooses the correct instrument for a surgical procedure. In this case, speech is meant to be a kind of instrument in the hand of a skilled surgeon of the soul. The speech act becomes an operation that eradicates dementia of the soul: the soul of a people as well as Helen’s. By restoring the good name and character of a woman who is also a central historical figure, he operates with words to re-interpret the people's memory of its past, purging it of disgrace and strengthening its disposition. What Gorgias proposes then is that from the present one is able to re-interpret the past with words and therefor able to actually alter the course of future memories of an immortal soul. And to whose soul is Gorgias ministering? Not Helen's so much as the collective soul of the Greeks. He sees that it is more important to purify Greek’s memory of Helen, than it is to tell the truth about her misfortunes. From this we can see that what is at stake in this case is not truth, but what is good for the immortal soul of a people, a polis, a civilization.

“…To tell the knowing of what they know is right but shows no delight.” Is truth worth nothing, according to Gorgias, if it is not also beneficial or flattering to the soul? I'm not sure. Perhaps goodness and truth are not equal because what is spoken can sometimes be the wrong truth at the wrong time. Gorgias promises to tell the truth of what matters, because truth leavened with goodness allows us to see the world differently. Truth is good when it is fashioned in a way that enhances the soul by putting bad memories in a new light. Perhaps... Gorgias is telling us the truth when he promises to tell us the truth, after all, and perhaps it is true that "what lingers is exactly analogous to what is spoken."


Gorgias' Encomium of Helen
Source: Rosamond Kent Sprague, ed. The Older Sophists: A Complete Translation by Several Hands of the Fragments in Die Fragmente Der Vorsokraticker Edited by Diels-Kranz with a New Edition of Antiphon and of Euthydemus. Columbia, South Carolina: University of South Carolina Press, 1972. 50-54.
Gorgias, the most famous rhetorician of the late fifth-century, composed this display speech as an exhibition of his talents. The brief he sets himself is to free Helen of blame for her part in causing the famed Trojan War through being seduced (or perhaps kidnapped) away from her husband Menelaus, king of Sparta, by the Trojan prince Paris (Alexander). Sections 8-14 represent a hymn to the power of rhetoric. MG
(1) What is becoming to a city is manpower, to a body beauty, to a soul wisdom, to an action virtue, to a speech truth, and the opposites of these are unbecoming. Man and woman and speech and deed and city and object should be honored with praise if praiseworthy and incur blame if unworthy, for it is an equal error and mistake to blame the praisable and to praise the blamable. (2) It is the duty of one and the same man both to speak the needful rightly and the refute the unrightfully spoken. Thus it is right to refute those who rebuke Helen, a woman about whom the testimony of inspired poets has become univocal and unanimous as has the ill omen of her name, which has become a reminder of misfortunes. For my part, by introducing some reasoning into my speech, I wish to free the accused of blame and, having reproved her detractors as prevaricators and proved the truth, to free her from their ignorance.
(3) Now it is not unclear, not even to a few, that in nature and in blood the woman who is the subject of this speech is preeminent among preeminent men and women. For it is clear that her mother was Leda, and her father was in fact a god, Zeus, but allegedly a mortal, Tyndareus, of whom the former was shown to be her father because he was and the latter was disproved because he was said to be, and the one was the most powerful of men and the other the Lord of all. (4) Born from such stock, she had godlike beauty, which taking and not mistaking, she kept. In many did she work much desire for her love, and her one body was the cause of bringing together many bodies of men thinking great thoughts for great goals, of whom some had greatness of wealth, some the glory of ancient nobility, some the vigor of personal agility, some command of acquired knowledge. And all came because of a passion which loved to conquer and a love of honor which was unconquered. (5) Who it was and why and how he sailed away, taking Helen as his love, I shall not say. To tell the knowing what they know shows it is right but brings no delight.
Having gone beyond the time once set for my speech, I shall go on to the beginning of my future speech, and I shall set forth the causes through which it is likely that Helen's voyage to Troy should take place. (6) For either by will of Fate and decision of the gods and vote of Necessity did she do what she did, or by force reduced or by words seduced or by love possessed.
Now if through the first, it is right for the responsible one to be held responsible; for god's predetermination cannot be hindered by human premeditation. For it is the nature of things, not for the strong to be hindered by the weak, but for the weaker to be ruled and drawn by the stronger, and for the stronger to lead and the weaker to follow. God is a stronger force than man in might and in wit and in other ways. If then one must place blame on Fate and on a god, one must free Helen from disgrace.
(7) But if she was raped by violence and illegally assaulted and unjustly insulted, it is clear that the raper, as the insulter, did the wronging, and the raped, as the insulted, did the suffering. It is right then for the barbarian who undertook a barbaric undertaking in word and law and deed to meet with blame in word, exclusion in law, and punishment in deed. And surely it is proper for a woman raped and robbed of her country and deprived of her loved ones to be pitied rather than pilloried. He did the dread deeds; she suffered them. It is just therefore to pity her but to hate him.
(8) But if it was speech which persuaded her and deceived her heart, not even to this is it difficult to make an answer and to banish blame as follows. Speech is a powerful lord, which by means of the finest and most invisible body effects the divinest works: it can stop fear and banish grief and create joy and nurture pity. I shall show how this is the case, since (9) it is necessary to offer proof to the opinion of my hearers: I both deem and define all poetry as speech with meter. Fearful shuddering and tearful pity and grievous longing come upon its hearers, and at the actions and physical sufferings of others in good fortunes and in evil fortunes, through the agency of words, the soul is wont to experience a suffering of its own. But come, I shall turn from one argument to another. (10) Sacred incantations sung with words are bearers of pleasure and banishers of pain, for, merging with opinion in the soul, the power of the incantation is wont to beguile it and persuade it and alter it by witchcraft. There have been discovered two arts of witchcraft and magic: one consists of errors of soul and the other of deceptions of opinion. (11) All who have and do persuade people of things do so by molding a false argument. For if all men on all subjects had both memory of things past and awareness of things present and foreknowledge of the future, speech would not be similarly similar, since as things are now it is not easy for them to recall the past nor to consider the present nor to predict the future. So that on most subjects most men take opinion as counselor to their soul, but since opinion is slippery and insecure it casts those employing it into slippery and insecure successes. (12) What cause then prevents the conclusion that Helen similarly, against her will, might have come under the influence of speech, just as if ravished by the force of the mighty? For it was possible to see how the force of persuasion prevails; persuasion has the form of necessity, but it does not have the same power. For speech constrained the soul, persuading it which it persuaded, both to believe the things said and to approve the things done. The persuader, like a constrainer, does the wrong and the persuaded, like the constrained, in speech is wrongly charged. (13) To understand that persuasion, when added to speech, is wont also to impress the soul as it wishes, one must study: first, the words of Astronomers who, substituting opinion for opinion, taking away one but creating another, make what is incredible and unclear seem true to the eyes of opinion; then, second, logically necessary debates in which a single speech, written with art but not spoken with truth, bends a great crowd and persuades; and, third, the verbal disputes of philosophers in which the swiftness of thought is also shown making the belief in an opinion subject to easy change. (14) The effect of speech upon the condition of the soul is comparable to the power of drugs over the nature of bodies. For just as different drugs dispel different secretions form the body, and some bring an end to disease and others to life, so also in the case of speeches, some distress, others delight, some cause fear, others make the hearers bold, and some drug and bewitch the soul with a kind of evil persuasion.
(15) It has been explained that if she was persuaded by speech she did not do wrong but was unfortunate. I shall discuss the fourth cause in a fourth passage. For if it was love which did all these things, there will be no difficulty in escaping the charge of the sin which is alleged to have taken place. For the things we see do not have the nature which we wish them to have, but the nature which each actually has. Through sight the soul receives an impression even in its inner features. (16) When belligerents in war buckle on their warlike accouterments of bronze and steel, some designed for defense, others for offense, if the sight sees this, immediately it is alarmed and it alarms the soul, so that often men flee, panic stricken from future danger as though it were present. For strong as is the habit of obedience to the law, it is ejected by fear resulting from sight, which coming to a man causes him to be indifferent both to what is judged honorable because of the law and to the advantage to be derived from victory. (17) It has happened that people, after having seen frightening sights, have also lost presence of mind for the present moment; in this way fear extinguishes and excludes thought. And many have fallen victim to useless labor and dread diseases and hardly curable madnesses. In this way the sight engraves upon the mind images of things which have been seen. And many frightening impressions linger, and what lingers is exactly analogous to what is spoken. (18) Moreover, whenever pictures perfectly create a single figure and form from many colors and figures, they delight the sight, while the creation of statues and the production of works of art furnish a pleasant sight to the eyes. Thus it is natural for the sight to grieve for some things and to long for others, and much love and desire for many objects and figures is engraved in many men. (19) If, therefore, the eye of Helen, pleased by the figure of Alexander, presented to her soul eager desire and contest of love, what wonder? If, being a god, Love has the divine power of the gods, how could a lesser being reject and refuse it? But if it is a disease of human origin and a fault of the soul, it should not be blamed as a sin, but regarded as an affliction. For she came, as she did come, caught in the net of Fate, not by the plans of the mind, and by the constraints of love, not by the devices of art.
How then can one blame of Helen as unjust, since she is utterly acquitted of all charge, whether she did what she did through falling in love or persuaded by speech or ravished by force or constrained by divine constraint?
I have by means of speech removed disgrace from a woman; I have observed the procedure which I set up at the beginning of the speech; I have tried to end the injustice of blame and the ignorance of opinion; I wished to write a speech which would be a praise of Helen and a diversion to myself.



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self-portrait of the artist as a young woman
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a father's love

wa-aaaaaaaahhh!
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Virgo HI 21

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Fortis

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We demand an explanation!
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it's magic

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sooo cliché

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Bernini’s Negotiation

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An Opportunity to Look

Renoir and Cassatt: An Opportunity to Look



In this essay we compare Renoir’s La Loge (c. 1875) and Mary Cassatt’s Lady in Black at the Opera (c. 1879), two works painted in the same medium, oil on canvas, and during the same period. First we will consider the overall Gestalt conveyed by the two images, moving from there to a closer look at the formal building blocks of each painting. We then ponder the sexual connotations of the paintings, as well as the ways in which gender or social status represented in them. In a concluding paragraph we return to the erotic charge that can be felt in these works, and we try as well to sum up the implications of our various observations. As we shall see, viewing Cassatt’s painting in light of Renoir’s has the effect of making us sensitive, in a way that we probably would not otherwise be, to the subterranean sexual content of that seemingly so ascetic work.

The paintings’ looks are very different from each other, but the events and settings they depict are identical: figures at the theatre are caught in the act of looking. Both pictures show moments of leisure, theatre life, the act of being seen, and the game of flirtation. Interestingly, the title of Renoir’s painting directs our attention not to the figures but to their circumstances and, perhaps, their intentions and desires. La Loge is a box at the theatre, but it is also a place where intimacies may be exchanged. Imagine a mid-twentieth-century impressionist work called The Drive-In, and we glimpse the range of connotations suggested by La Loge. A dandy’s wandering eye, an alluring, receptive woman seated next to him – it is like a snapshot, where the figures are seemingly caught almost at random rather than being formally posed, and is all the more sexually suggestive for its lack of formality and sense of raw, immediate presence. On the other hand, Lady in Black at the Opera, in which the lady is trying to remain hidden while in the public sphere, seems almost morbid.

To understand these images, we must also examine how our feelings and assumptions about gender roles work to shape the meanings we attribute to them. This is not to say that one must address gender to appreciate these works; we do so in the hope of achieving a more finely-grained understanding of the act of looking – which includes the power to express that act. As we know, the meaning of an artwork can change as its context changes, and “context” includes the period in which it is viewed and the question of whether or not the viewer’s period coincides with the work’s. Cassatt’s painting presumably speaks differently to a twenty-first century Californian than it did to nineteenth century frequenters of the Paris Salon. One strives not to be anachronistic, but we cannot help reacting to a painting with the ideas and perceptual habits that are ours. That is why we feel justified in noting – aware that it might be considered somewhat fantastic – that the negative space within the contours of the lady in black’s profile, forearm, and supported elbow forms what appears to be an image of a circumcised penis. We are not saying that Cassatt intended this image, of course. It may be quite invisible to someone who is not looking for it. But it is highly visible to one whose senses have been aroused by the erotic atmosphere of La Loge. The question of the penis will arise again.

Cassatt’s Lady in Black is an elliptical, sweeping, circular composition forming a lazy X of curving diagonals creating a background element of stirring action. The paint is a bit more tightly applied than in Renoir’s Loge, with a strong contrast of light and dark elements. There is a general quality of portraiture in the piece. The way it is cropped, with the figure in stark profile, directs our attention to the subject’s intense concentration, opera glasses in hand, on the spectacle before her. The juxtaposition of the indistinct blackness that forms virtually the entire lower right diagonal of the painting with the sweeping light and depth of the space that makes up the upper left introduces a powerful element of disorientation. The lines of the “X” meet at the locus of this disorienting contrast, namely the lady, whom, we discover, is much more than she appears. She appears to be unaccompanied, although we cannot say for sure whether she really is or whether this only seems to be the case as a result of the way the artist has composed the scene. The woman is of an age and is dressed in a way that suggests she is a spinster. The only exposed flesh, her face, emerges from out of the formless background to assume an aspect of precisely concentrated clarity. Thus framed, she gazes through her glasses at something in the open space of the theatre beyond the frame of the picture. Because we see her as unattended, and because she appears to ignore the viewer as well as other lookers, we feel inclined to say that she has adopted a masculine stance, in so far as it is right to associate masculinity with the assertion of the right to look without being looked at. From this we can infer that this woman is the flaneur, the dandy, the invisible eye wandering through the crowd. With her binoculars, she sees “farther” than others do, as if she occupies the future as opposed to the present that is inhabited by those around her and also, perhaps, by us. Even so, despite the subject’s distance from the others (and perhaps from us), all are involved in acts of looking. As she focuses on a distant goal, object, or desire, from a distance men focus on her. But she remains indifferent to the bold man in the middle background, who appears to be straining to see her through his binoculars. Does he desire her? Or is he merely curious? Is it legitimate to imagine that she disdains to notice him out of a refusal to be made into a mere spectacle, like the one on stage? Subdued, asexual, withdrawn, and disinterested, in her dark and unflattering dress, she seems to melt into the background – only to highlight the sharp clarity of a profile that, confident and self-composed, becomes the center of the composition.

Renoir’s La Loge is a diamond shape composition, with thick and heavy black and white vertical lines that seem to move glacially, if at all, compared to the dynamism of Cassatt’s Lady in Black. Renoir applies the paint in thick creamy swabs, loosely, as if in slow motion or rather freeze-frame – an invitation to look (and possibly more). The feathery brushstrokes are apparent, and the image is magnified as if seen through opera glasses, up close, blurred, and slightly out of focus. The woman, rendered in thick ribbons of black and white, occupies the foreground and most of the composition. Her arms amply spread, she displays an attitude that seems almost smug: she might want to know you, and is interested in what is happening now. She wants badly, we surmise, to be desired, or at least to be desirable. The delicate, pink, flesh-toned flowers we see in her hair, her fan, and her chest signal her fecundity and direct our attention to the glistening pearls draped loosely over her pillowy breasts and around her neck, the entire “scene” exposed frontally as if it were being offered at a buffet. The frothy texture of impasto paint lends a translucent quality to the surface of her flesh adding a butter-cream frosting appearance to the comely pink flowers at the plunging neckline of her open bodice. This chiffon texture of paint is like that of fresh icing over a Bundt cake – sweet, luscious, and eminently edible. Inviting your gaze, passive, open, receptive, she is addressing the viewer, you, and ignores the man who is sitting closely behind her and who seems stiff and rigidly composed by comparison: an erection prodding for a response. His figure composes a voluminous diagonal line, thrusting behind her and rhyming, as it were, with the arrow pattern that forms in her left sleeve. His back is straight and narrow; his left arm is drawn upward in his rippled evening jacket. While the girl leans forward into the light, illuminating her face, the man leans back, plunging his face into relative darkness that (together with his opera glasses) obscures the true direction of his gaze, though not disguising his pursed, anticipating lips. Pretending indifference to his companion’s open flirtation with – us?, he ostentatiously attends to other interests, if not the spectacle, then perhaps the ladies. Restrained, awkward, posturing, stiff, and erect, in formal dress that appears to be one size too small, rumpling around lapel and chest, a kind of strait jacket, he is finally no more than fussy – in other words, not much fun. It is no wonder that his date is flashing a “come hither” look our way. The juxtaposition of open female receptivity with frustrated, fidgeting masculine prissiness reflects, we are certain Sigmund Freud would agree, a psychological disposition of sexual voyeurism and repressed desires. Our eyes flit about the man, but settle on the woman. She is appetizingly forward, open, and inviting, but her invitation is extended not to her companion but to you. All of these nuances and innuendoes are put together in an image which is, we are inclined to imagine, an example of sophisticated pornography of the day.

The differences between these two works of art extend to differences between the artists. On one hand we have Mary Cassatt, an affluent American woman of decorum, who is invited by the Impressionists to work and show with them in Paris. And on the other hand, we have a middle-class Parisian man, Auguste Renoir. As we now know, a man painting a woman was so ordinary, in their day, as to go unremarked, whereas a woman painting anything at all was almost unheard-of. La Loge is clearly Renoir’s vision of an ideal lustful encounter, real or imagined (or both). This was an appropriate and acceptable way for a man to portray a modern, coquettish woman who seems to be on the verge of slipping out of her escort’s reigns. The subject of Cassatt’s painting is quite respectable by comparison. Cassatt’s affluence, connections, and decorum come through her art in her choice to portray a woman at a moment of change in how men and women are seen – a somewhat combative stance given that women painters would have been under pressure to portray women as they were typically portrayed by men. In other words, what Renoir can do with a woman and what Cassatt can do with one, as artistic subjects, are scrutinized and evaluated according to different standards. These standards are not only in accord with the Salon and its critics. They also operate in the larger social world of the artist. In that world, it would have been easy for Cassatt to portray women as decorous ladies. She also had “permission” so to speak, to play with sexual overtones, as Renoir did in La Loge, but that was not her style. The Lady in Black expresses Cassatt's vision of the limits to expression placed on women in a bourgeois society. It dramatically depicts the operation of social expectations and norms and presents, as it were, a “snapshot” of them in action. Cassatt’s exploration of the male aspects of her artistry is a delicate balancing act. To be a respectable female artist in a man's art world was to challenge expectations without becoming overly “political.”

Speaking of influences in both works of art, we must briefly address those of Courbet’s Burial at Ornans and Manet’s Olympia. If we examine closely enough Cassatt’s Lady in Black we will begin to see the influence of Courbet in her work: the black gown that blends into an undefined background is like the large area of darkness that predominates in The Burial at Ornans, and the predominance of negative space at the center of Cassatt’s composition expresses a similar disregard for the viewer’s expectations. The intensity of her gesture in this painting is all the more evident in comparison to Lydia Seated in A Loge Wearing a Pearl Necklace, also done in 1879 and typical of her more usual style. As Cassatt speaks to Courbet in this image, she seems to announce her desire to adopt his recalcitrant, avant-garde manner, usurping a male role for the female. At this point we again bring up what lies within the negative space that is the true center of the composition. Perhaps unwittingly, but entirely fittingly, Cassatt has “centered” the composition in the shape of a penis, as if to claim possession of the phallus as master signifier, a kind of microphone through which her artistic voice is amplified. The lady in black literally wears her phallus on her sleeve. There is also a hint of Artemisia Gentileschi’s Self Portrait, though more as an allegory of looking rather than of painting. In this sense, it could pertain to the representation of a modern woman, Cassatt herself being the flaneur. And, moving from here to Renoir’s Loge, we are reminded of the frontal, direct, steady gaze of Manet’s Olympia. Manet’s style is blunt and uncompromising, and Renoir’s portrayal of the woman in the loge is similarly brazen. The difference is that unlike Olympia, who is posed as an object for the male gaze, Renoir depicts a woman of a higher class, very much clothed, who acts for her own pleasure and not merely set up as needed for the enjoyment of a man. Aside from other obvious differences (class, hairstyling, social setting, etc.), the lady in the loge has a personality of her own and is accompanied rather than merely observed by the man who sits next to her.

Despite these many planes on which the works function, it is the erotic and sexual levels that remains most prominent, and we return to this dimension in conclusion. The paint in Renoir’s Loge is applied in a feminine manner, loosely and softly. The subject is a provocatively dressed bourgeois woman in a passionate and assertive posture. The invaginated pleats of her bosom are splayed away from one another and, together with her receptive expression, suggest the feminine position in sexuality. The man next to her is seated with a stiff, arched spine. His lips are tense and pursed, as if about to burst open. His gaze is focused and determined, as if concentrating on a specific goal. All this suggests the masculine position in sexuality. Perhaps he is looking off to another box, or perhaps his missing hand is behind or around the woman’s backside. There is also the possibility that he is getting a look at the woman next to him while pretending to look away through the glasses. He could be doing one or more of many things, but they all suggest sex. Though the couple are at the theatre, they are putting the loge to a time-honored use. La Loge, to my mind, is a portrait of sexual intercourse.

As for Cassatt, on the other hand, The Lady in Black at the Opera appears to be the complete opposite of sex. While Renoir is able to convey his own experience of a woman as a sort of edible confection, Cassatt is still adhering to the accepted social mores of the day. Cassatt portrays her subject as a lady of puritanical demeanor. Her use of paint is strong and tight, perhaps suggesting a lady in mourning, but in any case subdued, conformed, and absorbed in the activity of looking. Her hair pinned up tightly in her bonnet, she has the look of a lone spinster, surveying the crowd through her spectacles as if in scientific observation. She is focused on a distant object as she almost studiously avoids seeing the man in the crowd who quite assertively focuses on her. There is something comic about how this man, waving his arm for attention in a humorously futile, frozen gesture, egocentrically and who we feel believes himself to be at the center of things, has been placed by Cassatt in the distance, blurred, a mere speck in the crowd. It is this idea, we believe, of a woman who is there to see rather than to be reduced to a sight, that is at the center of The Lady in Black. The protrusion of a narrow band of loges extending from the man and ending at the lady’s head illustrates a solicitation to look, as if it were the bridge of the man’s desire that the lady acknowledge him. With her spinsterish look, the lady’s femininity is dormant, if not nonexistent. She is the agent, out to please no one, looking to her own pleasures, curiosities, desires, as in the orthodox male position. But the role of gender is in fact more ambiguous than we have so far suggested. Is the man necessarily trying to attract the lady’s gaze? Or is he merely straining to see her? If he is merely fastening his attention upon her, then he is assuming the role of the male gender. If he is trying to persuade her to accept him as a sight, then he is producing himself as “female.” Cassatt uses overlapping to create confusion in the viewer as to whether the man in the distance is rudely putting his hand in the face of the woman seated next to him, or whether it is resting, behind her, on the chair. Moreover, we cannot say for certain whether the lady is unselfconsciously enjoying the performance or engaging in some more contemplative or “scholarly” study. We must be careful to acknowledge that the lazy "X" in the painting's composition, and the corresponding ambiguities like these, as well, make it impossible to arrive at any final determination of the painting’s singular meaning.

As Renoir offers a stereotypical example of the male-female relationship, where the woman appears as the reactive object and the man as the active looker, Cassatt takes the subject into a different direction. To define the difference between the two impressions – that Renoir’s woman is there to catch your gaze and be admired while Cassatt’s lady would prefer not to be seen at all – is not entirely satisfactory, however, because the works contain irreducibly ambiguous elements. We can’t really know where the man is looking in Renoir’s Loge, whether he is gazing off or secretly groping the woman next to him. There is the question as to whether Cassatt’s lady is meant, loosely, as an “anonymous” woman at the theatre, or as the kind of “masculine” presence that surveys its dominion. The ambiguities in each picture persuade us to view them from a variety of angles, as the meaning of the picture shifts according to the filters constituted by them. In art, no conclusion is absolutely conclusive, so what follows is presented as the most probable interpretation at this moment of an on-going inquiry.

To state the obvious, then, Cassatt knows that she is a woman. We might assume, ipso facto, that she understands what a woman is thanks to her own experience of being a woman – a perspective not available to Renoir. And rather than “proving” her worth as a female artist by painting her version of woman as spectacle – as a sight to be seen, something to be evaluated or reduced to a commodity to be purchased and hung on someone’s wall – she disengages from this discourse. She seizes the opportunity to portray the woman as the looker in the theatre, this being the one place where it is à propos for a woman to be seen actively looking. Cassatt then upstages herself, qua woman-who-sees, by directing our attention to a man in the background and thus undermining the centrality of the lady in black – as if to represent her refusal to represent woman as object – even as an active object. In designing this composition, Cassatt is controlling the gaze from every angle, inside and outside the painting. Cassatt’s assumption, as the female maker of the painting, of the traditionally masculine position of mastery correlates with the painting’s subject, who is a woman but displays (as we have seen) decidedly masculine traits. Moreover, if we use Renoir’s La Loge as a control, as in the scientific method of comparing data, and accept his version of the ideological roles of males and females in society, we can see that Cassatt is arguing against Renoir’s version of the male-female dynamic. From one pivot, she defies his supposition by presenting the female, parallel to the male, as operating in a male-oriented manner. And from another point of view, she juxtaposes the male and female in opposite roles: the male, a distant object in the crowd subject to the gaze of the flaneur, who is in this case, the lady in black. In this way Cassatt accomplishes several things. First and foremost, by painting a woman with masculine characteristics, Cassatt plays with the presuppositions of femininity and inserts within this model the notion of androgyny. This is, perhaps, an understated suggestion that men can be objectified – that masculinity can be made into a commodity by means of art. By presenting the traditionally “objectified” woman as displaying masculine qualities, she associates masculinity with objectification. Cassatt further reinforces this theme by showing the man with the binoculars to be desirous of attracting the other’s gaze, in the way women are imagined to be. In this way, defining women as masculine and men as feminine, Cassatt formulates an unstable and dynamic set of questions about gender and art.

One might say that by assuming the dominant male role as the artist, the actor per se, Cassatt redefines the role of the modern woman. She challenges the conventional vision, as exemplified in Renoir’s La Loge: the ideologies of the way women exist in relationship to men, and vice versa.

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what is truth?

…What then is truth? A mobile army of metaphors, metonyms,
and anthropomorphisms- in short, a sum of human relations, which have
been enhanced, transposed, and embellished poetically and rhetorically
…truths are illusions…coins which have lost their pictures and now
matter only as metal, no longer coins… Nietzsche, Birth of Tragedy


Truth, as it is conceptualized in Western philosophy, is something that can never be acquired. And, as for Nietzsche, truth is a mere plaything, something we use to transport us from ourselves to an imagined reality. Truth has become a mere homonym, a displaced, connotative term that we’ve made which is detached from absolute meaning.

To Socrates and other ancient Greek philosophers the sign, truth, equals αρετή (areté), i.e. excellence and virtue. And to modern philosophers truth is now defined as the quality of being real. I can’t say for certain how theologians define truth as they perceive within the confines of their own mythologies, belief systems, what have you. Nonetheless, in man’s very pursuit toward truth an epic fascination spawned by Socrates over 2000 years ago in Athens ensued. Nietzsche claims in his Birth of Tragedy that, in summary, Socrates is the equivalent of evil deriving from the total destruction of values in Greek culture, i.e. the perfection of art and all that was good. For Nietzsche, this is a dramatic problem attributed solely to Socrates’ efforts, because truth is neither ascertainable, nor is it attainable; hence, the pursuit of it yields negative results, i.e. zero pleasure value minus the time wasted on its pursuit. It becomes, as all other illusions, just another way to expend limited resources. By studying Nietzsche, we discover his radical differentiation between this particular illusion and all others before it. As other Greeks created gods as representations of their archetypal values in order to live, so did Socrates set out to make a god of himself when he propagated the (latent) value of truth.

Nietzsche argues that in Greek (Attic) tragedy, and more specifically, in song and dance, the pinnacle of art in Greek culture could be expressed in its purest form. For, unlike other illusions, it was song and dance, dramatic dithyramb, through which man could completely identify with his god, the inspirer of the art, Dionysus. This identification with Dionysus led man, or members of the tragedian chorus, into an utterly complete intoxication (Rausch), with the essence of life qua the interconnectivity of nature via song and dance. The distinction between this and all other illusions is that the sheer desire to be something rather than nothing, or than oneself, disappears through a kind of transubstantiation experienced by the participants of Greek tragedy. For it is through this Dionysian intoxication that man communes with himself and his fellows as his god. Man is thus able to lose himself entirely and becomes something far beyond the illusion of identity he once had, something we ourselves might find essentially beautiful.

As Nietzsche claims, this experience of sheer intoxication yields pleasure enough to far surpass all other activities, and is unlike any other in the hierarchy of illusions. Despite all of that, Greek culture became intrigued with the study of a mere concept rather than the experience of intoxication. This study led to a dominant fascination with right and wrong thinking, logic, statements of truth, and higher virtues disassociated with the more primitive. However, if truth were a woman (or the archetypal value of its corresponding ruler, Socrates), would we be able to identify ourselves in her virtues as well? This may seem like a rather odd way of examining the notion of truth. But truth is a mere projection of the beholder onto its object:
…that whole tangle of subjective passions and stirring of the will
directed at some specific thing which it takes to be real…


It is only until we begin to identify ourselves with the illusion that we can see the actual transparency of the very idea or projection and thus become disillusioned by it. So, perhaps in this discussion we should be asking the question: what is the motivational structure behind the identification with truth or the desire for truth? That is, what kinds of motives made Socrates need this illusion? In order to answer these and other questions (e.g. have we any practical use for truth?), we must first consider the source of this fascination/identification with truth and the various hierarchies of illusions. For it is within the hierarchical structure that the meaning of truth rests. It is the very notion of the illusion that corresponds to its Greek creator, Socrates, who must have believed that a) people are all just going along locked up behind their phony exteriors, and b) civilization is just another illusion that can be altered by someone’s will and his will was just as good as anyone else’s.

…The Greeks knew and felt the horrors of existence; in order to live
at all they had to place in front of these things the resplendent, dream-born
figures of the Olympians…

Nietzsche claims that in order to live, the Greeks needed to create the gods. This means that the Greeks needed to subordinate their will to an illusion in order to escape the horror of living. They were called by their own desires to be subordinate to imaginary influences, some benevolent and some malevolent, which operate within a complex structure of power. Allow me to digress momentarily to explain how this works: For example, Zeus is a benevolent god who corresponds to the archetypal values of hospitality, travel, philosophy, and who looks after the suppliant. If I want to go on a long voyage away from home in hopes of meeting others who would look after my needs, I would make a generous offering to the Temple of Zeus. This act of sacrifice of a lesser token for a greater benefit would bless my quest. That gods are made in the image of the Greek’s values, unnamable energies that may already exist outside the folklore of our minds, this kind of performative is, in a sense, like praying to one’s idea of an aggrandized self as the avatar of Zeus. There, then, becomes a temporary identification with protection from a fear of harm. It is like a game of conscious sublimation.

Socrates, on the other hand, had a distinct aversion to this kind of identification with external gods, and specifically to the Dionysian. He needed to subordinate his will to his own mind, to reason, and to his own idea of what was good and virtuous because he believed that from virtue follows riches and all good things.

The distinction that Socrates makes of the sum total value of truth is that it amounts to virtue and beauty, that it derives from the realm of thought, and it ought to represent man’s highest attainment. Thought is a mere product of the mind, and the body anatomizes the mind of each and every man. The pursuit of truth becomes not only a matter of right thinking, or virtue, and wrong thinking, but it as well becomes a service to the archetypal values corresponding to Socrates.

Hence, the entire fulcrum of Western thought hinges on this very ideal, an obscurity of reality, and is based in homage to Socrates’ mythical imagination, one whose archetypal values are those of the purest asceticism. Since truth is an ascetic illusion that is neither ascertainable, nor desirable, is there no satisfaction associated in pursuing it? We ask ourselves why Socrates engineered such an insidious fantasy. What Nietzsche would like to suggest then is the question of the importance of this truth. If we could get our hands on it, would it be a good thing to have?

One way to test the value of truth is to draw from the methods of practical application. In law, a conclusion is drawn on which of two arguments was successful or whether or not the defendant successfully answered to the charges. Most of legal practice carried forward into a trial is based on the act of asking specific questions for predetermined responses. (A good lawyer is never fishing when engaged in the rigors of a courtroom drama and therefore never asks a question unless he knows the answer.) If the charges were reduced to some kind of bargain, then the defendant had then to answer to those respective charges. Criminal charges are always raised or reduced according to a scale of a reasonable degree of probable victory or to whatever the People, i.e. the attorney representing the state, believes he can prove based on the persuasion of the jury pool along with other variables like suppressed evidence, etc. The verdicts of criminal actions are based on a belief of whether a person is guilty as charged according to the burden of proof by the prosecution. This belief stems from collective assumptions usually of a jury whose decision is based on ascertainable evidence of which truth is excluded entirely. This is because truth, unlike empirical evidence, is not ascertainable to a judge of fact. Furthermore, locutionary statements of facts are not always truths, but most often are the best answers given based on one’s memory. Consider the usefulness of truth for Socrates in his Apology. First, he was charged for corrupting the youths of Athens. Yet he was unable to defend himself because he attempted to structure his argument on the very basis of truth. Truth had no suasory power in Socrates’ Apology because truth is neither ascertainable nor valuable in practical application, and it is for this very reason that any judgment or verdict in law is based on actual, ascertainable proof, which is usually in high percentage, substantive documentation, i.e. reliable hearsay and stuff that can be manufactured, oftentimes right on the spot.

Given that truth is neither valuable, in a practical sense, nor pleasurable, what does it take for a man like Socrates to want to believe in such an ascetic life pursuit? Socrates claims in the Apology that people are nothing pretending to be something. He also states that he knows that he knows nothing. And, it is in this knowing of nothing that puts him at an advantage over those who pretend to know something. But, at the same time, he claims a) to know the value of truth and virtue, and b) that virtue leads to riches and all other good things. He also argues that his poverty should be evidence enough that he knows nothing. This means that even he knows not the value of said truth and virtue. I am not convinced that Socrates really knows truth at all. He merely believed in his illusion and wished to impose it upon everyone else. And, history shows us that he has been just as successful as someone like Hitler- a man with a dream. So, why did Socrates set out to destroy a civilization? He admits that everyone else is pretending to be something when they are really nothing. In other words, Socrates believes that it is the better cause to have faith in one’s own ability to reason in pursuit of ascetic virtue, rather than to direct or subordinate the will to external illusions in pursuit of Dionysian debauchery. To Socrates, truth is not something external but is of a potentiality within all men.

We can’t say that Nietzsche is entirely justified in his accusation that Socrates legitimately destroyed all that was good and replaced tragedy with the pursuit of truth, which Nietzsche also claims has become a prejudice of Western Philosophy. Notwithstanding the problems of Nietzsche’s argument, he makes an interesting proposition. Though, personally, I would have to argue against Nietzsche on the grounds that his supporting evidence of the claim is neither sound, nor useful, but merely his opinion.

Since Nietzsche cannot know what the perceptions of people actually were while experiencing Attic tragedy at the time first hand, he also cannot know the value of it first hand. The pursuit of identification with the Dionysian nature and the pursuit of truth are not dissimilar. Both are still mere illusions, playthings that can be equally intoxicating. As one man metaphorizes his reality through song and dance and the aid of dramatic dithyramb, so does he have the power to transform his consciousness through reason. For Nietzsche to call Socrates evil because he allegedly destroyed what Nietzsche regards as the highest art of Greek culture, i.e. something that Nietzsche liked, is far too subjective. What reason could Nietzsche have given about intoxication that would persuade me that something is at stake in comparing truth to art? Not only does Nietzsche admit that art is the highest truth, but he also relies on Socratic reasoning to attempt to persuade us into siding with art against reason. Even so, his argument fails. It simply can’t be done without implementing a mutual language, one that excludes all mythologies. Even if he decided to use art as this common language to assess and appraise meaning, a common practice of the church and for several millennia, this is still impossible since culture is language made up of its respective mythology. Art is still grounded in mythology and its spectrum of cultural symbology and meaning. Needless to say, Nietzsche can’t seem to get around the very thing he refutes, because in doing so he accidentally reduces the worth of his own illusion by neutralizing the distinction between two comparable “metaphors.”

It seems what Socrates has proposed is that it is better to be a reasonable man than an intoxicated man. For, it is by reason that man can answer to his actions. This is virtuous. But, by intoxication, he becomes a madman who can potentially destroy himself and others. This is stupidity. To Selenus, who claims that the best thing about life is “not to have been born, not to be, or to be nothing,” Socrates would say: that if you are born, it is better to know you are nothing rather than to pretend to be something. This is his truth. This is his intoxication.

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The Triumph of 20th Century America

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The Dionysian Faith of Jesus the Jew

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the many conversations in me head

the school of athens
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Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life

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Eric The Half A Bee

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the Galaxy Song

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I Miss my Friend

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in case you got lost

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a reminder

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and before...

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a lifetime

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photon

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me at birth

I'm adorable
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dude, I know you don't believe me...

but, there are these things called stars. they are up there in the sky. I know you can't see 'em right now, because there's too much light out. but they are right there all the time. just keep looking for them and pretty soon you'll see them too
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for a certain tutor

A narrow fellow in the grass
Occasionally rides;
You may have met him,--did you not,
His notice instant is.

The grass divides as with a comb,
A spotted shaft is seen;
And then it closes at your feet
And opens further on.

He likes a boggy acre,
A floor too cool for corn.
Yet when a child, and barefoot,
I more than once, at morn,

Have passed, I thought, a whip-lash
Unbraiding in the sun,--
When, stooping to secure it,
It wrinkled, and was gone.

Several of nature's people
I know, and they know me;
I feel for them a transport
Of cordiality;

But never met this fellow,
Attended or alone,
Without a tighter breathing,
And zero at the bone.


-Dickinson

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clean-x

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me

anangelanangelanangelanangelanangel. ya. that's me. i'm just a lilttle angel

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cellphone pix

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fecundity

The Annunciation (1489-90), Sandro Botticelli, 1445-1510 , tempera on wood, The Uffizi, Florence, Italy. This is by far my all time favorite annunciation painting
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A Critical Deposit

A Critical Deposit


In Painting and Experience in Fifteenth Century Italy, Michael Baxandall states that any “fifteenth-century painting is a deposit of a social relationship.” In other words, Italian paintings of the Fifteenth Century in some sense embody, reflect, or offer information about the conventions governing how individuals interact with one another. In my opinion, however, Baxandall’s thesis, at least in this form, is otiose. Baxandall discusses a number of contracts that were executed by painters and patrons. We are shown financial records that document what is clearly a stark business transaction in which, because these paintings were frequently commissioned for the church, the artists’ freedom is quite limited. This is not to say that there was an absence of piety associated with the production many of these works. The audience presumably believes the stories these paintings tell. To try in any way to discount this obvious fact would be futile. But piety is not the only issue for the painters. A painter might also want to show that he is favored by the muses, that he is the greatest story-teller of all, a bard. After all, it is the centrality of the Biblical stories and what they represent, together with the artist’s skill at evoking them, that makes these works worth paying for.

Like the money spent by Hollywood producers in order to make movies with state-of-the-art visual effects, Italian painters too required substantial investment to contribute to their equivalent of the entertainment industry. But here again the question of piety arises. As often as not, piety and money go together quite well. The willingness to invest extravagant resources in the production of religious art is itself a tribute to God’s word, not merely as a way of giving alms to the church, but more significantly to clarify the story, to render it fresh and more vivid – a properly aesthetic aim. Both financier and artist are thereby each gaining grace, the one advertising his willingness to put his wealth, and the other his willingness to put his skill, aesthetic prowess, in the service of God. To say, as Baxandall does, that paintings embody social relationships is to say too little. Of more interest is the character of the social relationships that we find emerging through these paintings. We see business contracts for mutual profit, the struggle for achievement and recognition on the part of the artists, the desire to inform the public about sacred matters (and also to reinterpret them), the desire of financiers to demonstrate their piety, and no doubt much else as well. Our aim should not be merely to identify “the social,” but to characterize it in its complexity, ambiguity, and multiple and overlapping meanings.

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van Eyck was here

arnolfini wedding/betrothal witnessed by the artist. there was a hope, but she's not actually pregnant
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I can see...

myself in you
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creatio ex nihilo

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RAW

if I want your opinion, I'll give it to you