I DIDN'T BREAK THAT

Knock Knock, it's me...

madameb — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 22:37:02 GMT

Thanks Solovox. Epic. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqXi8WmQ_WM

Okay, Fuck it.

madameb — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 01:36:05 GMT

So, most of you don't know that after a short four month stint I "resigned" from my Editorial post at the creative firm I was working at in the Pearl last week. It was a difficult decision after all. But after much deliberation with my better half and basically a quick decline into hell from the rejection of my boss and lack of trust, work and responsibility... I firmly believe it was the right decision. This was confirmed by my bosses apology to our "team" that it was her fault that I left and she takes responsibility for my unhappiness. Great, a day late and a dollar short. Thanks for pouring salt into my wounds and wasting my time. So, where does that leave me now? Well, I'm at home... again. I am looking for work. I do not want to be a stay at home mom. I love having a savings account and a cosmetics / shoe / hair budget each month. More importantly... I want something to contribute to in a positive way besides being a laundry folder, diaper washing, housecleaner. Oh, and I miss my housecleaner. WAAAAA! Let me know if you hear of anyone who needs someone fabulous to work for them. I am fabulous.

WIG OUT TONIGHT !

madameb — Thu, 12 Jun 2008 17:04:22 GMT

Time to brush off that old haggard piece of crap you call a *wig* and bring her down to the Q-Center tonight for WIG OUT ! * contests and prizes for various categories, such as BIGGEST and most outrageous wig. * An "Iron Chef" type Wig-Off, for those of you who think you've got what it takes to design a wig on the fly (I'll be offering up my expertise on this one) * A Wig Walk Off, complete with giant runway. * DJ Jimme Jamma will be spinning in that magical way that he does ! * Admission FREE - Cheap Hooch too. * SAM ADAMS (mmmm, nuff said) & MOI ! I'll be heading over to Queer Bait afterwards...its at the eagle underground (below Casey's). nw 6th and couch. xoxox MB

Voting & Postage

madameb — Wed, 14 May 2008 03:38:53 GMT

Did you know that yesterday, Monday May 12, US postage increased by 1 cent? This is important because if you have not mailed your ballot (and you ARE voting, right??) in as of yesterday, you will have to put additional postage on it, or it MAY get returned to you, thus not arriving in time for the May 20 election. If you mailed it on Monday with a 41 cent stamp on it, you may be screwed. Can you say disenfranchised voter? I'm pissed this wasn't all over the front page of the papers, the news, etc. Fuckerz Or, if you prefer not to pay to vote (i.e. 42 cents), you can take your ballot to an official ballot drop-off site.

GO BUY THIS BOOK, NOW!!!

madameb — Fri, 09 May 2008 03:36:23 GMT

It's no secret that I love velvet paintings. Shit, the proof is in the pudding -----> http://people.tribe.net/madameb/blog/62739e97-c772-422c-8873-4f476eb39735 However, the loverlies who bring you the Velveteria Museum (http://www.velveteria.com/) have published a book and it is KILLER!!! Mine is autographed... blblblththththblblblblththththththth!!! Go. To. Powells. Tomorrow.

oh god

madameb — Wed, 30 Apr 2008 03:38:41 GMT

how can one person feel as miserable as I do now. achy body achy head achy ears achy nose achy scalp fever, kids are germ bags, i swear.. ahhhgghg

Deadly Sin of the day

madameb — Thu, 17 Apr 2008 20:30:29 GMT

Honesty and Questions

madameb — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 16:17:08 GMT

First, I find the stray Husky dog last night who I take in and feed, water and make a cuddly bed on the deck. I post "found" ads on craigslist, oregonlive, multnomah county animal control and the Humane Society all before going to bed at 11:30pm. This morning, that dog is gone. Second, I find someone’s bankcard in the parking meter this morning. Google the name, call the bank... owner lives in Bend, but is obviously downtown this morning so I wanted to contact her just give her the card back. Bank has no cell number. I have to cut up the card and she has to go through the hassle of getting a new one. I can’t help but wonder why this kind of stuff ALWAYS happens to me. Haven’t I proven that I’m a good honest person by now? I’m kind of annoyed. Why doesn’t the universe put some energy into me. Why is MY body falling apart. What a whiny little bitch.

Happy Mardi Gras Bitches!!

madameb — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 17:54:13 GMT

I have to work tomorrow, so needless to say, I won't be partying. I might flash the hubby though, just cause he deserves it and we get nostalgic for Louisiana at times.

CrackBerry

madameb — Mon, 04 Feb 2008 04:52:45 GMT

Oh man, I just got one of these beautiful little BB Pearl phones (PINK!). I can say, without a doubt, it is my FAVORITE FUCKING PIECE OF ELECTRONICS that I have every owned. EVER. And yes, smartass... it IS a vibrator too. http://www.handango.com/PlatformProductDetail.jsp?siteId=1999&osId=946&hz1=4&hz2=BlackBerry+Pearl&jid=C1CB88DB8F37EX1EC3445DAFBD9XB714&platformId=5&N=4294917542&R=125969&productId=125969 see? me + crackberry = together 4-evr

Happy V-D !

madameb — Fri, 01 Feb 2008 18:36:38 GMT

Drew will be beyond excited when he gets a card full of THESE ! http://www.subversivecrossstitch.com/valentines2008.htm

My friend Pepe

madameb — Sat, 15 Dec 2007 17:56:37 GMT

I get to see him tonight!! I love this crazy man from BarTHelona sooo much! He's playing a holiday party that i'm going to. I can't wait to smooch on him!

This is what a pigfucking tool looks like.

madameb — Tue, 11 Dec 2007 23:08:47 GMT

Take notes kids. The GOP is about to endorse a complete cockface. ***************** Huckacockface: Asked about gays in the military, for example, he didn't just reject the idea but added: "I believe to try to legitimize that which is inherently illegitimate would be a disgraceful act of government. I feel homosexuality is an aberrant, unnatural and sinful lifestyle, and we now know it can pose a dangerous public health risk." ++++ (in other words, please keep my private homosexual indiscretions a secret, PuhhhLLEASE!!) +++++ • Called for the elimination of political action committees and campaign contributions from lobbyists. He also said candidates should not be allowed to receive contributions until one year before an election and said there should be limits on the amount of out-of-state money they could accept. +++++ k, not so bad. +++++ As Arkansas governor, Huckabee formed a political action committee based in Virginia to raise money for non-federal candidates that allowed him to travel and raise his profile for a potential presidential run. The Hope for America PAC shut down earlier this year as Huckabee entered the White House race. +++++ wait, ...what??? +++++ • Said he would not support any tax increases if elected to the Senate. Huckabee's record of raising some taxes as Arkansas' governor has drawn fire from fiscal conservatives in the presidential race. +++++ clearly, he is balanced +++++ • When asked whether the U.S. should take any action to kill Iraqi President Saddam Hussein, Huckabee replied: "The U.S. should not kill Saddam Hussein or anyone else." +++++ except faggots, and poor people of course. but since disease and starvation take care of them, no blood on his hands! +++++ • Rejected the idea of women in combat "because of my strong traditional view that women should be treated with respect and dignity and not subject to the kinds of abuses that could occur in combat." +++++ fuck me once a month for procreation and make me a turkey pot pie! +++++ • Said living together out of wedlock "is demeaning to the highest expression of human love and commitment. I reject it as an alternate lifestyle, because it robs people of the highest possible relationship one can experience: marriage." +++++ highest, except for the relationship with god, you mean.... right?? OOOPS!, +++++ • Said he believed no one has a constitutional right to an abortion and supported requiring minors to obtain parental consent. Huckabee also said he supported requiring doctors to discuss abortion alternatives and a waiting period. +++++ Huckabee hearts Fetus' but FUCK THEM once their born... let their poor asses STARVE, be abused, end up in foster care! +++++ Huckabee's vocal opposition to gay marriage and abortion have attracted evangelical Christians' support and vaulted him to the top of the field in Iowa. +++++ i just boycotted corn +++++ • Said he had never smoked marijuana or "experimented with any illegal drug." In fact, he said he had never used any tobacco products because of "a very sensitive allergy" and would support a smoking ban in public places. +++++ because what's right for ME, is right for everyone! +++++ • Opposed passing a law that would give workers time off to care for an ailing family member. In 1993, Congress passed the Family and Medical Leave Act, which entitles eligible employees to take up to 12 weeks of unpaid leave for the birth or adoption of a child, to care for a close relative with a serious health condition or if the employee could not work due to health problems. +++++ again, screw those poor people with kids, families, ya... the Christian way, buddy... +++++ • When asked about the nomination hearings of Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, Huckabee said: "I watched or listened to many hours of the Thomas hearings and was firmly convinced that the preponderance of testimony backed up Clarence Thomas." +++++ Because Anita Hill SHOULD have been in the kitchen where she belonged instead of at a job!, and it wouldn't have happened" +++++ • Called the federal welfare system "disgraceful" and said the burden should be shifted from the federal government to local communities. +++++ should "those" people be someone elses problem? +++++

NEED A WIG

madameb — Mon, 26 Nov 2007 23:09:49 GMT

I know, believe it or not, i need to borrow a wig. It will be in good hands, i can assure you. Marie Antoinette Wig. White. I will have it back by Dec 10.

Doing something new

madameb — Sat, 24 Nov 2007 18:58:35 GMT

I've started doing some sewing on the side. I just made my site live. Lots of cute duds... more to come. www.mammabees.com

Happy T-Day!

madameb — Thu, 22 Nov 2007 01:27:51 GMT

Fun with panhandlers!

madameb — Wed, 31 Oct 2007 20:47:49 GMT

Okay, so i'm all dressed up as a Mime and I head to the $ store on Hawthorne to pick up some T or T stuff for the kids. On my way back to my car, a panhandler (aka *reedie*) asks me for some change. So, I reached in my pocket, pulled out some *money* and put it in his hand. Of course, there was no money because I was Miming. The look on his face... PRICELESS!! I want to be a Mime EVERY DAY!

10 am

madameb — Wed, 31 Oct 2007 18:09:59 GMT

I love halloween!!!

Ghost vid on youtube.

madameb — Tue, 30 Oct 2007 05:15:50 GMT

Damn dude. If I didn't believe before... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eo8CP9Hhb58&NR=1 Happy Halloween.

Stomach Flu

madameb — Thu, 25 Oct 2007 00:01:36 GMT

Oh my god. I've never had the stomach flu before. And i'm fucking GLAD about that. Well, i have it now (or something that is so fucked up, i want to DIE). I did eat at a shitty mexican joint on sunday and actually haven't felt right since. But, today about 1pm it hit me like a ton of bricks. Keeping kids alive while you are sick is awful. i feel awful.

Aids Walk 07 - Wig Nation!

madameb — Mon, 15 Oct 2007 22:14:31 GMT

Our team (Wig Nation !) walked with about 10,000 other folks to raise money for the Cascade Aids Project yesterday. The weather was phenomenal and the cause was great. http://picasaweb.google.com/madamebouffant/AidsWalk2007WigNationWalksAgain

an email, a phone call, SOMETHING!!!

madameb — Fri, 21 Sep 2007 21:59:41 GMT

think think think think think think... i am so impatient. MAKE HER CALL ME.

Listen, do you smell something?

madameb — Mon, 17 Sep 2007 20:37:28 GMT

Last night I stepped outside for some kid free fresh air and it SMELLED LIKE FALL ! You know that smell, I usually refer to it as "smelling like Halloween". Weird, I'm not sure if I'm ready for all the bundling yet. Fall also means it's been a year since Simon came along, unfathomable.

The Revolution Will NOT Be Televised -

madameb — Wed, 12 Sep 2007 05:46:08 GMT

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ypRS5lrKZP8 You will not be able to stay home, brother. You will not be able to plug in, turn on and cop out. You will not be able to lose yourself on skag and skip, Skip out for beer during commercials, Because the revolution will not be televised. The revolution will not be televised. The revolution will not be brought to you by Xerox in 4 parts without commercial interruptions. The revolution will not show you pictures of Nixon blowing a bugle and leading a charge by John Mitchell, General Abrams and Spiro Agnew to eat hog maws confiscated from a Harlem sanctuary. The revolution will not be televised. The revolution will not be brought to you by the Schaefer Award Theatre and will not star Natalie Woods and Steve McQueen or Bullwinkle and Julia. The revolution will not give your mouth sex appeal. The revolution will not get rid of the nubs. The revolution will not make you look five pounds thinner, because the revolution will not be televised, Brother. There will be no pictures of you and Willie May pushing that shopping cart down the block on the dead run, or trying to slide that color television into a stolen ambulance. NBC will not be able predict the winner at 8:32 or report from 29 districts. The revolution will not be televised. There will be no pictures of pigs shooting down brothers in the instant replay. There will be no pictures of pigs shooting down brothers in the instant replay. There will be no pictures of Whitney Young being run out of Harlem on a rail with a brand new process. There will be no slow motion or still life of Roy Wilkens strolling through Watts in a Red, Black and Green liberation jumpsuit that he had been saving For just the proper occasion. Green Acres, The Beverly Hillbillies, and Hooterville Junction will no longer be so damned relevant, and women will not care if Dick finally gets down with Jane on Search for Tomorrow because Black people will be in the street looking for a brighter day. The revolution will not be televised. There will be no highlights on the eleven o'clock news and no pictures of hairy armed women liberationists and Jackie Onassis blowing her nose. The theme song will not be written by Jim Webb, Francis Scott Key, nor sung by Glen Campbell, Tom Jones, Johnny Cash, Englebert Humperdink, or the Rare Earth. The revolution will not be televised. The revolution will not be right back after a message about a white tornado, white lightning, or white people. You will not have to worry about a dove in your bedroom, a tiger in your tank, or the giant in your toilet bowl. The revolution will not go better with Coke. The revolution will not fight the germs that may cause bad breath. The revolution will put you in the driver's seat. The revolution will not be televised, will not be televised, will not be televised, will not be televised. The revolution will be no re-run brothers; The revolution will be live.

Taking a much needed break...

madameb — Thu, 06 Sep 2007 20:48:00 GMT

Albeit a very short break. Leaving Friday, not returning until Sunday. No kids, NONE... Tiki Bar Costume Camping GUNS.