Snow Day

MedicineDaka — Thu, 22 Feb 2007 10:31:16 GMT

I can't say I am overly excited about the weather at the moment....which is a blanket of white outside my window....but it does create for an internal mood. Somehow all the snow creates a permission to stay at home, cook good food and watch a movie without even considering what else you might be doing outside the house. Along with the white stuff is the reality that I prolly will not be heading to california for a poker tournament I had been intending to attend. The 6 weeks of solo parent time is coming to a close and I thought a road trip would be the perfect, get of town, take some perspecive, clean slate sort of activity. Its possible that the temps could warm up considerably in the next two days but somehow the pass closing tonight helped make the decision for me. In fact, it might be perfect timing to sit up in ceremony this weekend instead. Or....just continue to rip through more movies. I have been quite a movie whore during my solo time with Rowan. I finally saw Crash and Click....which is awesome if you havent seen it yet. Adam sandler rocks. I'd love to hang with him one day. Him and johnny Depp, although not necessarily at the same time. Johnny and I could have lunch and get philosophical...tell me what its like to deal with fame and help me appreciate all the mundane things I take for granted. Adam I feel like would be a bro. Catch a ball game, play some cards, talk about girls. Doesn't he seem that way? Anyway....I watched Brotherhood of the Wolf today...not sure what the hell that was about. Waste of time. I saw The Departed, acting was great, but the story had so many twists, I thin kit lost itself along the way. Could haver been a great one with the cast they had.....but the writing missed something somewhere along the line...The Bourne Supremacy was great...I love Matt Damon's character, even though it just seemed like an extension of the first movie, I enjoyed it. I finally watched the Kill Bill movies....sick. Jackass Two sucked. And last night I went to see Pans Labyrinth. AMAZING! so fucking good, from the cinematography to the effects to the message of the story. beautiful! So nice to see a really good movie...its been a while. I also took rowan to see night in the museum, which was significantly better than I ever imagined it to be....alwasy good to have low expectations. So sitting next to me I have The Godfather...can you believe I have never seen this? I think its because my grandmother watched it when I was little and I was freaked out with all the cursing. hit too close to home :) Malcolm X, Four brothers, Hannibal and babel are the next ones up.... On a separate note, I went to a workshop with this past weekend that was amazing. Its called family constellations. I had been introduced to it years ago with a guy from Germany who was comingto seattle regularly. I loved the work then but somehow doing it in Ashland with Stephen Victor has blown me away. I'll post the link here to read about it: http://www.transpath.stirsite.com/albums/album_image/4187683/1226018.htm While I have not set a constellation myself for many years, I have found this work to be deeply transformative. Even just standing in as a representative in someone elses constellation can be cathartic. There is something to this work that resonates with me very deeply. Its as if, so aspect of my service to humanity had gone untapped until began to offering myself as a representative for others familky systems. I have no idea hwere it will take me, but i recognize how this work is leading to an understanding of my livelihood in a way that no vision quest, medicine journey or teacher has has been so able to tap so directly. The key aspect of this type of work is it is beyond your mental capacities to comprehend all that is truly taking place. There are so many layers to it and its focus being on the field of energetics lend to shifts taking place despite our lack of understanidng of the hows or whys. I highly recommend it for anyone at any stage of growth....I am partial to Stephen because of his Andean shamanic background...but I would imagine anyone with significant expereince with the work would be adequate in facilitating a worthwhile experience. Thats my rant for today.....damn, still snowing.

Not so Super Sunday

MedicineDaka — Mon, 05 Feb 2007 04:57:08 GMT

In the moment, I am contemplating radical lifetsyle changes. Last week, I was looking into doing a work exchange at a Permaculture Retreat Center in Costa Rica. Last night, it was writing to several organizations in Peru that host guests for shamanic diets. Today, it is searching through job posts on career builder.com and imagining living out the fantasy of a beach side flat in the Palm Beach/Fort Lauderdale area. Random, I know. I think you can see the parallel, no? The Sun. I dont mean this watered down thing floating above the mountains here in Southern Oregon. I mean tan skin year round....salt in my hair...and a smile on my face. Those of you who know me well, recognize this banter. Its only recently, that I have recognized, I can do whatever the f&*k I want to do with my life. Not sure when the light bulb went off, but even in the midst of the Amazon, there was this notion of a life I had to return to. This rubber band behind me, stretched nearly to its capacity....threatened to yank me back in the instant that I continued beyond its flexibility range. Not sure where the hell I got that notion or when it opened up.....but all of a sudden, I am considering anywhere in the world as a potential home and being really honest with myself about what I truly desire. At this point, enjoying the possibilities and honestly, just throwing ideas in every direction to see where doors may open. There are a few commonalities in the potential futures I take off the rack and try on.....One is a desire to have another child. Not sure when that one crept in, but lately I feel like a woman whose hormonal clock is ticking. Everytime I see a baby, I want to go over to it and pick it up as if it were my own. God, I can't imagine how it must be fvor women who actually have that internal timer ticking. Another common thread is as mentioned, warmer climes....the ocean...and proximity to urban conveinences. I'm drawn to latino influences...spanish speaking...spicier more colorful styles....oh, yeah and darker complexioned boys and girls. I want to live in a place where I can do yoga at sunrise on a relatively quiet beach, have lunch in a styley veggie-ish, hip cafe....work on my laptop outside on the deck of my home in a pair of flip flops and surf shorts, head to a local card room for a poker tournament and afterwards celebrate my winnings at funky dance establishment that is filled with bohemian goodness, rather than the usual drug induced, silicone inspired, chaos. Does this place exist? Look into your crystal ball and search for me, will you?

In The Moment

Snow Day

Not so Super Sunday